ruff_hi
Nov 24, 2005, 08:20 AM
“Sire! Something important has occurred over-night!”
“Urg – let me sleep, we hashed this all out last with our advisors. The head of science was given to Jacques, the important cultural directorate was awarded to Henri for his fine speech about us. Oh, and the stupid blunder-head, Alex, got his foreign relationships position – as if there are other people on this earth that France will need to be nice to – HA!”
“Sire, the world has changed, come to the window and see.
http://img256.imageshack.us/img256/4955/sc027ae.th.jpg (http://img256.imageshack.us/my.php?image=sc027ae.jpg)
WHAT!! Where did those cities come from? We better get out there and find out what is going on.
… later that same day …
Alex: “… and they have all started singing in the town to the north. So, to summarize, we have dancing to the west, the smell of incense to the east, what sounds like rocks being knocked together from the south and singing from the north. I have no idea what these heathens are doing”
Louis IV: “Have you been out to talk to them? Do they understand French?
Alex: “We cannot set foot in their land without starting a war and that is the last thing that I think we want to do at this time. The people I have tried to talk to, well, yell at is more accurate, have all ignored me.”
Napoleon: “Sire, we may need to fight out!”
Louis IV: “No, not yet, we must sent out our people while we still can. Get starting on that expansion pack.”
… a few days later ...
http://img256.imageshack.us/img256/4847/sc039pk.th.jpg (http://img256.imageshack.us/my.php?image=sc039pk.jpg)
Louis IV: “This is not looking good. They are too strong for us to fight and the land that we can travel on is slowly coming under their control. Where are we up to with that expansion pack?”
Jacques: “We are still trying to figure out that round object so they can take more stuff with them. We should have it all figured out shortly.”
… too late ...
http://img256.imageshack.us/img256/8123/sc055ci.th.jpg (http://img256.imageshack.us/my.php?image=sc055ci.jpg)
Henri: “Sire, I have figured out what they are doing. The singing, dancing, rock chipping (that is called ‘sculpture’) as well as that funny smell that started from the south east the other day (I believe that is paint, Sire) is all about culture. They have started these towns around our beautiful capital and loaded them with artists. They are trying to out culture us!”
Louis IV: “HA! No-one out cultures the French. We are French for goodness sake. All the great artists come to my city to learn and then we send them out to help the heathens.”
…later that year …
Alex: “I believe Henri is correct Sire. Their culture is starting to win the peasants over. They are starting to control more of our land. We must do something!”
http://img256.imageshack.us/img256/9280/sc082qz.th.jpg (http://img256.imageshack.us/my.php?image=sc082qz.jpg)
Napoleon: “Sire, we need to meet this aggressive behavior with our mighty armies.”
Louis IV: “Yes, it is starting to look that way. Napoleon, start training the garrison.”
http://img256.imageshack.us/img256/614/sc101fv.th.jpg (http://img256.imageshack.us/my.php?image=sc101fv.jpg)
… the situation after a few week-ends of military exercises …
Napoleon: “Sire! We are ready. The exercises were a huge success. Everyone was put through their paces and we did win all the ‘engagements’ with the ‘enemy’.”
Bernard: “Sire. I don’t know what Napoleon was playing at but that army of his has destroyed valuable city resources and food production areas. Look at this map …”
Louis IV: “Who are you?”
Bernard: “Town planning, Sire. Here, look at this map … we need these resources productive, not destroyed by Napoleon’s army. We have to grow our population so that we can expand.”
http://img256.imageshack.us/img256/1160/sc126cr.th.jpg (http://img256.imageshack.us/my.php?image=sc126cr.jpg)
Louis IV: “Firstly, it is MY army, not Napoleon’s. And, secondly … Napoleon, please instruct your new recruit ‘Bernard’ in our current predicament.”
Napoleon: “With pleasure, Sire – you there! left turn, left, right, left, right, ”
… some time later …
Henri: “Sire, have we tried to talk to these people? Is there anyone else we can appeal to? Maybe we can adopt all of their religions? I did see a missionary outside our gates this morning.”
http://img256.imageshack.us/img256/6941/sc158jj.th.jpg (http://img256.imageshack.us/my.php?image=sc158jj.jpg)
Napoleon: “Sire, the situation is bleak. We have thrown our mighty battle army at these ‘people’ but to no avail. They seem to have access to almost unlimited resources.”
http://img256.imageshack.us/img256/2355/sc172uf.th.jpg (http://img256.imageshack.us/my.php?image=sc172uf.jpg)
Bernard: “Sire, our population is reducing.”
Louis IV: “Back from the army I see Bernard. How was it?”
Bernard: “I only live to serve, Sire. But I must report that the population (that is, the three families that are left, have been talking about the blasted foreigners and their great works of art and stupid ‘culture’ with increasing devotion. There was even some rabble rousing over the week end.”
Louis IV: “[sigh] Not much rabble rousing given the current situation.”
… later that same day …
Jacques: “Sire! We have done it. We have invented the WHEEL!”
Louis IV: “Napoleon!”
Napoleon: “With pleasure, Sire”
… sounds of a body being crushed by a large wheel …
Louis IV: “Quick, Napoleon, grab what you can and follow me. We need to sneak out of here before the people come for my head.”
http://img256.imageshack.us/img256/3508/sc205ar.jpg
“Urg – let me sleep, we hashed this all out last with our advisors. The head of science was given to Jacques, the important cultural directorate was awarded to Henri for his fine speech about us. Oh, and the stupid blunder-head, Alex, got his foreign relationships position – as if there are other people on this earth that France will need to be nice to – HA!”
“Sire, the world has changed, come to the window and see.
http://img256.imageshack.us/img256/4955/sc027ae.th.jpg (http://img256.imageshack.us/my.php?image=sc027ae.jpg)
WHAT!! Where did those cities come from? We better get out there and find out what is going on.
… later that same day …
Alex: “… and they have all started singing in the town to the north. So, to summarize, we have dancing to the west, the smell of incense to the east, what sounds like rocks being knocked together from the south and singing from the north. I have no idea what these heathens are doing”
Louis IV: “Have you been out to talk to them? Do they understand French?
Alex: “We cannot set foot in their land without starting a war and that is the last thing that I think we want to do at this time. The people I have tried to talk to, well, yell at is more accurate, have all ignored me.”
Napoleon: “Sire, we may need to fight out!”
Louis IV: “No, not yet, we must sent out our people while we still can. Get starting on that expansion pack.”
… a few days later ...
http://img256.imageshack.us/img256/4847/sc039pk.th.jpg (http://img256.imageshack.us/my.php?image=sc039pk.jpg)
Louis IV: “This is not looking good. They are too strong for us to fight and the land that we can travel on is slowly coming under their control. Where are we up to with that expansion pack?”
Jacques: “We are still trying to figure out that round object so they can take more stuff with them. We should have it all figured out shortly.”
… too late ...
http://img256.imageshack.us/img256/8123/sc055ci.th.jpg (http://img256.imageshack.us/my.php?image=sc055ci.jpg)
Henri: “Sire, I have figured out what they are doing. The singing, dancing, rock chipping (that is called ‘sculpture’) as well as that funny smell that started from the south east the other day (I believe that is paint, Sire) is all about culture. They have started these towns around our beautiful capital and loaded them with artists. They are trying to out culture us!”
Louis IV: “HA! No-one out cultures the French. We are French for goodness sake. All the great artists come to my city to learn and then we send them out to help the heathens.”
…later that year …
Alex: “I believe Henri is correct Sire. Their culture is starting to win the peasants over. They are starting to control more of our land. We must do something!”
http://img256.imageshack.us/img256/9280/sc082qz.th.jpg (http://img256.imageshack.us/my.php?image=sc082qz.jpg)
Napoleon: “Sire, we need to meet this aggressive behavior with our mighty armies.”
Louis IV: “Yes, it is starting to look that way. Napoleon, start training the garrison.”
http://img256.imageshack.us/img256/614/sc101fv.th.jpg (http://img256.imageshack.us/my.php?image=sc101fv.jpg)
… the situation after a few week-ends of military exercises …
Napoleon: “Sire! We are ready. The exercises were a huge success. Everyone was put through their paces and we did win all the ‘engagements’ with the ‘enemy’.”
Bernard: “Sire. I don’t know what Napoleon was playing at but that army of his has destroyed valuable city resources and food production areas. Look at this map …”
Louis IV: “Who are you?”
Bernard: “Town planning, Sire. Here, look at this map … we need these resources productive, not destroyed by Napoleon’s army. We have to grow our population so that we can expand.”
http://img256.imageshack.us/img256/1160/sc126cr.th.jpg (http://img256.imageshack.us/my.php?image=sc126cr.jpg)
Louis IV: “Firstly, it is MY army, not Napoleon’s. And, secondly … Napoleon, please instruct your new recruit ‘Bernard’ in our current predicament.”
Napoleon: “With pleasure, Sire – you there! left turn, left, right, left, right, ”
… some time later …
Henri: “Sire, have we tried to talk to these people? Is there anyone else we can appeal to? Maybe we can adopt all of their religions? I did see a missionary outside our gates this morning.”
http://img256.imageshack.us/img256/6941/sc158jj.th.jpg (http://img256.imageshack.us/my.php?image=sc158jj.jpg)
Napoleon: “Sire, the situation is bleak. We have thrown our mighty battle army at these ‘people’ but to no avail. They seem to have access to almost unlimited resources.”
http://img256.imageshack.us/img256/2355/sc172uf.th.jpg (http://img256.imageshack.us/my.php?image=sc172uf.jpg)
Bernard: “Sire, our population is reducing.”
Louis IV: “Back from the army I see Bernard. How was it?”
Bernard: “I only live to serve, Sire. But I must report that the population (that is, the three families that are left, have been talking about the blasted foreigners and their great works of art and stupid ‘culture’ with increasing devotion. There was even some rabble rousing over the week end.”
Louis IV: “[sigh] Not much rabble rousing given the current situation.”
… later that same day …
Jacques: “Sire! We have done it. We have invented the WHEEL!”
Louis IV: “Napoleon!”
Napoleon: “With pleasure, Sire”
… sounds of a body being crushed by a large wheel …
Louis IV: “Quick, Napoleon, grab what you can and follow me. We need to sneak out of here before the people come for my head.”
http://img256.imageshack.us/img256/3508/sc205ar.jpg