Have a special interest that is being ignored by our leaders? Need special sway in your Poll? A vote early and often campaign boost? You've come to the right place!

At Boondoggle & Pork, we're masters at getting the Special Attention You Need (tm) for your coveted plan, constitutional change, or get-rich-quick scheme.

For a sliding scale starting as low as 1gpt and ending somewhere north of there, we can offer these individual and highly customized services:

Lessee. Well, for 1 gpt, we can monitor your thread traffic and post occaisionally when things get slow to make sure people come in to see what's new.

For 20 gpt, we get really fancy and analyze who your market is, and do targeted PMs to potential customers who have not yet purchased, for example, Ministers and other Gov't officials who might need extra security.

For 100gpt we'll do a full SWOT (strengths, weaknesses, opportunities, threats) analysis, recommend marketing approaches, and solicit for gov't contracts. There will likely be bootlicking involved.

The Get Me Into Office program provides campaign strategy consultation, campaign management, candidate training, speech and concept assistance, candidate promotion and thread management services for the package price of 800g.

Package elements are also available individually:

Strategy Consultation: 100g
Campaign Management: 300g
Speech and Concept Assistance: 300g
Candidate Promotion: 300g
Thread Management Services: 200g

Don't think you can beat that incumbent official? Yes you can! Not sure what position to run for, or even how many elections to participate in? We do! Are there skeletons in your closet that must remain buried? All of our employees carry shovels and tasers as part of their basic equipment! Want the finest candidate promotion available? You found it!

Don't leave your dreams of elected office to chance. Hire the professionals who can make you a winner. Boondoggle & Pork has an impressive current record of 2 wins, no losses and 1 tie in the Get Me Into Office Program.

Two things, first, how much to get you to promote my bodyguard and mercinary service? I'm just starting up, so I can't afford much. Or have I come to the wrong place? Do I need to start an advertising agency and employ myself?

No, no, step inside! No job too small, no fee too high.

Lessee. Well, for 1 gpt, we can monitor your thread traffic and post occaisionally when things get slow to make sure people come in to see what's new.

For 20 gpt, we get really fancy and analyze who your market is, and do targeted PMs to potential customers who have not yet purchased, for example, Ministers and other Gov't officials who might need extra security.

For 100gpt we'll do a full SWOT (strengths, weaknesses, opportunities, threats) analysis, recommend marketing approaches, and solicit for gov't contracts. There will likely be bootlicking involved.

Of course, we can always work out some piece of your costs as barter for services. I may need a bodyguard. Do you offer palanquin bearers?

Sorry, no palanquins, but I can offer services as a bodyguard or mercinary. Lets see... You must travel alot in your line of work...
I can offer to provide you with a fast horse and a well armed bodyguard (me personally at the moment) between cities as well as camping gear, rations and medical treatment on the road.
All this normaly costs about 70g per trip between cities (much cheaper than the 300-400g you would need to but all the stuff).
Plus I can provide in-city bodyguarding for about 5-10gpt. I offer these prices as estimates in the hope of effecting a mutually beneficial deal.

I certainly don't need a SWOT (though maybe if I am really established down the track), but I like the 20gpt plan. What would you need for that in terms of combining services and gold (while I like the plan, I'm sure you can understand that a fledgeling buisness cannot afford quite so much, especially one with high overheads adn establishment cost!)

Ah... Well, Hmm.

Since we don't have cities yet, travelling between them seems moot, for the moment. The in-city (or currently: in the valley, between the one place, and that other, different place) bodyguarding could be helpful, as there seem to be a lot of people arming themselves to the teeth. In exchange, I'll provide the Plan B option for the low low price of the in-village bodyguard service and 13gpt.

How's that sound?

Sounds good to me, if you throw in a simple 1gpt plan for the useful items shop. I'll lend you a horse!

Perfect, as I'm likely to have to sell my horse once all these business startup bills arrive ;)

Looks like we have a deal!

(tacks 1st gold piece proudly to wall)

This is to announce that Boondoggle & Pork, Lobbyists has officially set up their new hut on Fanatika Square, which is that dusty area with the twigs marking it off, down there by the big rock. I encourage all other businesses to join us there, making Fanatika Square a, uh, what's it called? a 'central-bidness district'.

Must be called that cause people bid on things....

As soon as I figure out the rules, this will be an official business.

Lot's of room in Fanatika Square, by the way. Just mentioning it.

Advertisment space!

I would like to be your employee... thats how it will work:

As you lobby things or people or businesses, i have a good offer for you:

I have plenty of posts where i would like to offer advertisment space.

We must talk about payment though.
Who to:
* I offer 1 line of advertisment space for any kind of lobbying, advertising for a business etc.
* I will only hold one add at a time
* The ad will be of size=0
* Coloring of the ad will cost 2* the price
* Custom formatting will cost additional 2* the price
* Url-Implementation will cost additional 2* the price
* Title- or Location Ad will cost 5* the price
* Avatar-Ad will cost 10* the price
* I get payed for as long as i hold the ad in my signature, the duration will be set in advance and payment is done in advance
* If i get forced to remove the ad by a 3rd party which is not under my controll (like mods), then the payment for the outstanding time will not be given back
* the price for a campaign will be fixed at the signing time of the contract according to my postcount on that day.
* if the contract is canceled from my side, then you get the outstanding money back (like i did 1 day and you payed 6, you get the money for 5 days back from me).
* if you cancel the contract before the time is up, you only get 50% of the outstanding money back (like i did 1 day and you payed 6, you get money for 3 days back).

Example:
If we comply on 1/100 gold per post, rounding up on posts per day (rl) and i have 2500 posts at the moment we sign the contract:

This would cost you 25 gold per day for a plain text ad.
plain text: 25gpd
colored only: 50gpd
bolded without color: 50gpd
bolded with color: 100gpd
plain with url: 50gpd
colored with url: 100gpd
bolded with url, no color: 100gpd
bolded and colored with url: 200gpd

if you decide to do an plain text campaign with url for 10 days, this will cost you 500gold in total in this example. the high-end version will of course be 2000gold. and the low-end no-url version would be 250 gold.

gpd=gold per day (real time days) from the signing of the contract for the number of days specified for each campaign.

THE IDEA OF SELLING SIGNATURE- OR OTHER POST-BASED ADVERTISMENT-SPACE IS PATENTED TO DISORGNAIZER.
LICENSES CAN BE OBTAINED FROM HIM AT A RESONABLE PRICE OF 50% OF THE RESULTING INCOME.
ANY COPYING OF THIS IDEA OR THE CONCEPT WILL BE PROSCECUTED!

Interesting idea, though your pricing is a bit steep (and by steep I mean far exceeds what I make on a contract). Of course you will need that much to pay Shaitan to prosecute your copyright infringement suits ;)

sure. but as i said, we should talk about payments. now what would be suitable on a daily basis for a simple plain-text ad?

example: a normal citizen will (out of the current rule proposal) earn 30 gold per 10 days (roughly). having it up to 25 per 10 days? would that be ok? you could then still make profit out of it.

Dis, I think it is a good idea, but I am not making any financial deals until 1) my business is officially registered, and 2) there is actual consensus on the RPG rules. Right now I don't know how much money I have, am earning, am spending, or will owe.

Originally posted by Danke
Interesting idea, though your pricing is a bit steep (and by steep I mean far exceeds what I make on a contract). Of course you will need that much to pay Shaitan to prosecute your copyright infringement suits ;)
Apro, Poe & Nuffin would be happy to represent disorganizer in defending his copyrite.

What would it cost to harrass department leaders until they vote on outstanding Council Votes? Same thing with governors and Legislative Votes.

I thought you and CT did that for free!!

Yeah, but if I can pay someone else to do it... ;)

Plus I may need to contract this service for one of my own customers.

Danke: Apro, Poe & Nuffin is ready to assist your business in registering. Do you have a more developed price list? If you do, we'll need it to make sure your business is classified correctly.

Originally posted by Shaitan
What would it cost to harrass department leaders until they vote on outstanding Council Votes? Same thing with governors and Legislative Votes.

Just harassing with no intent to sway is cheap; harassing with motive costs a bit more :-)

Originally posted by Shaitan
Danke: Apro, Poe & Nuffin is ready to assist your business in registering. Do you have a more developed price list? If you do, we'll need it to make sure your business is classified correctly.

Well, that's tough since "all the market will bear" is hard to pin down. Let me take a look at what others are charging and I'll get back to you.

I hope you still remember my advertising offer for you ;-) We still should comply on a payment plan so you could offer that to your customers for maybe campaigning the next elections.

I have not forgotten, just swamped lately with RL! I'm trying to catch up though. I'll ping you after i get the business back up and running

k'

Boondoggle & Pork, official re-opening!

Since the red tape is almost completely out of the way (thank you, Shaitan!), I am re-opening B&P,L's offices. I should say, I am rebuilding the offices as we are building a spanky new wattle & daub office at One Fanatika Square. A beautiful two-room affair to house us and a desk in the corner for the Fanatika Square Buildiung Association.

I'm very excited.

WWWWWHHHHHEEEEEWWWWW. I AM SOOOOOOOOOO WASTED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Diabloinex - Spam, especially invasive and disruptive spam like this, will not be tolerated. Do this again and you'll get a vacation.

Boondoggle & Pork in cooperation with Apro, Poe & Nuffin is proud to announce a comprehensive service package for election candidates.

The Get Me Into Office program provides campaign strategy consultation, campaign management, candidate training, speech and concept assistance, candidate promotion and thread management services all for the low, low price of 800g.

Package elements are also available individually:

Strategy Consultation: 100g
Campaign Management: 300g
Speech and Concept Assistance: 300g
Candidate Promotion: 300g
Thread Management Services: 200g

Don't think you can beat that incumbent official? Yes you can! Not sure what position to run for, or even how many elections to participate in? We do! Are there skeletons in your closet that must remain buried? All of our employees carry shovels and tasers as part of their basic equipment! Want the finest candidate promotion available? You found it!

Don't leave your dreams of elected office to chance. Hire the professionals who can make you a winner!

Good news! I've just received word from the Price Manager that your business startup is approved. You're official! I will now put your business in the "registered" part of the index thread.

Hallelulah and pass the pork! :)

Got a job for Boondoggle and Pork. I need your help to promote the Deputy Governor proposal and the PR Office proposal for Almightyjosh. What can you do and how much will it be? We can go big here, AJ is very committed to these programs and has put his accounts under our joint discretion to get them passed.

I have a job for you. Pm me to find out the specifics. It must remain a secret until nominations and elections come around.

The Great Iguanaman

For 20 gpt, we get really fancy and analyze who your market is, and do targeted PMs to potential customers who have not yet purchased, for example, Ministers and other Gov't officials who might need extra security.


Put SKILORD's Politics and Image Company down for one of these.

Danke, I am intrested in the full version of the Get Me Into Office program package. I am undecided between the President or Military Leader at the moment, I may need a jump start :)

Danke, here's 800 gold. I'm running for science leader against a 4 term incumbent. He's youthful and vigorous and loved by the people. I'm old, crotchedy and the most investigated citizen in demo game history. Boy, have you got your work cut out for you! :lol:

(Do I get a refund if I lose the election?)

Boy, you can tell it is almost election time!! I will discuss with Shaitan (as this is a shared activity). Thanks for the interest, everyone!

Fanatika Square, Bavaria - Sep 25th. - Boondoggle & Pork, Fanatika's leading custom special interest service bureau, today announced that it has been purchased by Shaitan. Terms were not disclosed.

Shaitan, perhaps best known as the legal genius and entrepreneur behind the reknowned Apro, Poe & Nuffin legal powerhouse, adds to the APN family to create (with Yes, No & Abstain Polling Services) a veritable triumvirate of services catering to the movers and shakers of Fanatikan Society.

With Boondoggle & Pork, one of the oldest firms in Fanatika, Shaitan gains a pioneer in custom billing and using big words like "trumvirate".

Neither Danke or Shaitan could be reached for immediate comment, but Danke was sighted at his Fanatika Square townhouse dancing giddily while hefting overly heavy trunks onto a loaded cart.

Boondoggle & Pork has accepted 2 contracts for the "Get me into office" program and is currently working on these. During our transition period we will be unable to accept new contracts. We will reopen fully within a week with a revised slate of services.

Thank you for your support!

Dear Shaitan,
maybe you also remember my "signature advertising(tm)" idea. the offer still stands, maybe we can pm with each other for a price offer?
just drop me a note.

dis

Once I've done a bit of reorganization here (and the elections are over) I'll contact you to work out rates.

The offices of Boondogle and Pork are once again open for business. Lobbying and back door dealings with a touch of class. No job to big, no fee either. Stop in and chat. We're sure to be able to help.

Is the Get Me Into Office program still being offered :).

I was wondering if it still continuing since I have Over heard that Falcon02 is making a comeback and planing to run for Military :eek:. Well, Looks like I should run for a different office :)

Hi Danke/ Shaitan I would like a Strategy Consultation. Get back to me on this.
Thanks,
Sir Plexus; Crimson Knight; Hawk of Cinnamon

@Civanator - It sure is. We'll get started immediately.

@Plexus - Happy to help. Please PM or post the situation/problem to be consulted.

oh well thats little 'ol me not going for military this time then

Great to hear the Get me into Office program is still running :D, I am planning on running for Domestic Leader :)

Here is the 800g for the Get me into Office program


Orriginaly posted by Shaitan
@Civanator - It sure is. We'll get started immediately.

P.S. Umm... I think you had the names mixed up ;). I am intrested in the Get Me into Office Program, I dont think Civanator had poasted anything about the Program. Only Me (CivGeneral) and Plexus has recently poasted about it ;). Though I can understand the mistake since it is early in the morning ;).

Originally posted by CivGeneral
P.S. Umm... I think you had the names mixed up ;). I am intrested in the Get Me into Office Program, I dont think Civanator had poasted anything about the Program. Only Me (CivGeneral) and Plexus has recently poasted about it ;). Though I can understand the mistake since it is early in the morning ;).
Doh! You caught me posting before the coffee was brewed. :crazyeye:

Originally posted by Shaitan

Doh! You caught me posting before the coffee was brewed. :crazyeye:

:lol: and I had finished my breakfast at the same time you were making your coffee ;).

Anyway, Here is the plan, After much though. I have decided to run for Domestic Leader :). I like to run for Domestic Leader since I like to organize the Sci/tax/lux rate and other responsibilites Domestic has :).

ok i might run for military yay :) but still dont think ill win might have to employ you see whos nominated first

Fanatikan Copyrighting Association will copyright the name "Boondoggle & Pork, Lobbyists" for you. It will come at a cost, but who knows who might try to steal your name?

CivGeneral: 800g (http://forums.civfanatics.com/showthread.php?postid=555486#post555486)
GMIO program

Plexus: 800g
GMIO program, via PM:
Plexus wrote on Oct 23, 2002 05:56 PM:
Dang, you are persuasive, I'll do the GYIO:)

Gross: 1600g
Profit: 1280g

Distribution:
Boondoggle & Pork: 256g
CEO (Shaitan): 128g
Shaicorp (51): 457g
BCLG100 (9): 80.6g
Donsig (10): 89.6g
SAaM (10): 89.6g
VHS (20): 179.2g

VHS has been banned from the demogame and his shares were sold to someone. I don't know who though.

At the moment, the Bank of Fanatika has control over VHS's assets.