"Can I hold your bag for you?"

Want some bacon?

Go for the record!

See you at five for the potluck. Oh, are you bringing the pasta salad or a dessert?

"I'm a virgin"

"How about a pint?"

"I hate you."

I'm an American!

Dude, I love that vest, it's da' bomb!

(If he has a bad map) "Dude, here's the real map to the white house.".

"I'm from the government and I'm here to help."

Can I have a sip of your bottled water?

I am so proud of my country that I will die with the American Flag draped over my body.

Hey, do you hear something ticking?

You shouldn't say, "can you tell me how to get to the Unitarian church", 'cuz they wouldn't know where it is. :(

I have a picture of Mohammed... wanna see?

Why are you wearing a towel on your head?

"Spare a light?"

If it's a hostage situation:
"I'm just going to call for pizza."

"Hey, buddy, I'll buy your ticket for you and your friends!"

"I hate flying! I want to get down on the ground as soon as possible!"

Allah allah allah!

Since not all terrorists are fundamentalist Muslims:

"Is that a gun in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?"

I bet you couldn't handle 72 virgins.

'dam it to allah!'

'muhamad dam it!

If Terrorist is in a robe:

"Hey dude,nice dress!"

If female:

"How old are you?"

Even if she's a terrorist it's not polite to ask a woman her age.

If female:

Did you know you look fat in that?

Let's get some super bacon cheeseburgers!!

http://www.recipestar.com/img/quizzes/bacon_addict/bacon_burger.jpg

"I'm calling the police."

I work for the FBI.

*discusses the socioeconomic and political factors that contradict the rationalization of the terrorist's cause*

"Take a left to the main Road, walk straight down and on your 3rd right, turn in and cross the road. You should see the Empire State Building. Are you a tourist?"

(If its a female)
"Wuh-oh! Someone's pregnant! Could I baby it?"

"Can I get your autograph!?"

Touch me like a Catholic priest touches young boys.

(espeically if they're a Catholic terrorist)

"Hello." :)

In general.

"Show me yo moves!"

If a woman.

"Show me yo boobs!"

"Who wants a hug?"

Who did you vote for last election?

"Why do all you guys smell funny?"

Why do you guys talk funny?

"Can I see that suitcase,sir?"

Why aren't your jokes funny?

Is your turban dirty?

'But my name's John!'

Let's blow this joint and have some fun.

"Are you a Muslim?"

"Why do you hate our freedom?"

Write me sometime. Here's my address.

"Why do you hate people!?!?!!?!?!?!?!?"

Is it true you guys are all queer?

hurry up or I'll be late for my bar mitzvah!

Home made detonator? Ah! I bet it doesn't work!

Do you wanna see something," (Moons the Terrorist)

"Hey. Is your hair wet?"

Can I have a gun too?

Can I have a gun too?

That's what she said!

She did say that didn't she:D

"Qantas never crashed"

"Hi. I'm George."

Speak in a bush-style accent.

is that the police repelling outside the window?

"My name is George W.Have you a man named Osama bin Ladan?

Interesting thread juxtaposition:

What not to say to a terrorist?
Stupid proverbs

If he's a vacuum cleaner salesman;

You suck.

Coz he'll want to blow you up for making such a terrible attempt at a pun.

"You aren't a very terrifying terrorist..."

He will either laugh or kill you, depending on his opinion of Jeff Dunham.

"I don't understand what's wrong with a perfectly good elephant penis."

"Excuse me sir, would you be interested in purchasing life insurance?"

"I don't understand what's wrong with a perfectly good elephant penis."

What?

'Is that a detonator in your pocket or are you just pleased to see me?'

"What's blowin' up, eh?"

"Betcha can't do it again!"

What?


He took that from a quote in my sig. It was completely sensical in context, but makes no sense here.

"Ok, Mr. Sahad. Where do you see yourself in three years?"

He took that from a quote in my sig. It was completely sensical in context, but makes no sense here.

I think I remember the original...

Anyway: 'Ever been to Omagh? Nice place'

Terrorist: "I'm looking for a building."
You: "Oh, that's me, m'name is Bill Ding."

"Mammon is my copilot".

"I'd believe in that religious crap for $1 million".

"We should turn the middle east into one big porn lot."

"20 bucks in my pocket says you can't get some idiot to fly a plane into a skyscraper in New York."