For gods sake don`t mind the crappy english

Tokuwaga was standig on his knees looking at the man about to execute him.He could see how well the axe glittered in the sun,his head and hands was tied and there was lots of people waiting for his death, this was like a birthday for them.
Two years ago he had started a rebellion to end the rule of the leaders in Kyoto, the people was suffering and all those leaders cared about was filling their own pockets. Now he had been arrested and was about to die. He started to look at the wals surrounding the fort were the execution was about to take place when he noticed something weird.There was just archers guarding the walls, no swordsmenn. This was weird he thougt. The executior was walking over to him and made his axe ready
"Any final words?" he said whit a smile around his face.Tokuwaga didnt answer. The man lifted his axe and was about to hit when suddenly an arrow came flying trough the air and left it self in the head of the executior.Another arrow came, then another and another.Tokuwaga realised what was happening the fort was being atackt by his own soldiers.
Suddenly his old seckond in command jumped down in front of him. "Tojo!, i knew you would rescue me!" "You didnt think we would just leave you here would you?"
Tojo drew his sword and cut lose his emperor.
Around him were dead soldiers serveing the goverment. The fort was won and his troops didnt have one single loss. Well Tojo said "What is your first order back as chief again?" "Rally the troops, let them rest one day and send someone to get us some wather" "Tomorow we march on Kyoto"

Gereat. I got two spelling errors in the first two linde

i meant great

Good writing, but I would have preferred an option for "Good" without having to say "best in the world".
Can you please write some more?

You ask the reader to ignore your "poor english", but I don't think that I myself, as a reader, can do so. Grammar and spelling exist for a reason: to provide clarity of thought so that you as a writer can better convey your message to the reader. When I read these lines, I find myself distracted by the awkward spelling mistakes and unable to focus on the story itself.

Tokuwaga was standig on his knees looking at the man about to execute him.He could see how well the axe glittered in the sun,his head and hands was tied and there was lots of people waiting for his death, this was like a birthday for them.

Keep in mind that it's physically impossible for someone to "stand on his knees". "There was lots of people" simply sounds wrong; you should know enough to spot such an obvious grammatical error. If you're trying to make your work great (as the poll would indicate), you need to have your words working for you, not against you. :)

As for the story itself, there is no real scene, no characterization, nothing beyond a rather basic description of the events involved. It's also quite short, for that matter. Not at all bad for a first attempt at writing, but there's much to be improved upon in this story before it can begin to be called "great." Please try to fix your spelling issues in the future; I can figure out what you mean, but it really does distract from the quality of your work. I'm not trying to offend here, but you asked for comments and I thought I would provide some - at least more than simply a vote in your poll.

I will try to post some more. Sulla i know that my spelling errors are annoying so i guess i will spend more time reading it trough next time.
Help from you means much since i`ve read every report on your Civ Page.
If i knew how i would remove the poll......

This tread will be closed now unless there is a huge amount of requests to continue. This was something i started on whitout really having an intrest of it. I will probably just write it up as it was instead of this story crap, i`m just not cut out for it.
But this still stands as in my opinion my best game ever.

Tnx to everyone who has read this pice of crap.


THIS TREAD IS NOW CLOSED




-Volum