seanos08
Apr 17, 2004, 08:09 AM
Note - See German response in Tale Of Theodora. Note this is based on a real Regent level game which I won by space race - and never fought France.
Sorry about the French Bashing but I am a New Zealander at Heart and a greenie. I have no problems with the French people and can speak bad French.
SCENE PARIS. President Joan's War Room. Marshall Napoleon is present.
Enter the Byzantine Ambassador Julian.
Joan (Cautious): Welcome Ambassador. I hear you are at war with Germany. Why ?
Julian: The Germans viciously attacked us! We are weak and Germany is your biggest strategic rival. What do you want for an alliance against Germany ?
Joan (Facetious) 50 Tanks
Julian - but the closest city to Paris is Dortmund and they have a wine supply you need.
Joan (annoyed) We buy that wine at a fair price and the germans sell us excellent dyes at a fair price - whereas your little spice scam what was that ? 2 turns of spice for Republic? What a Rip off.
Napoleon: I suggest you leave.
Joan: Wait - Von Runstead will be here soon - maybe I can be a mediator.
Enter Ambassador Von Runstead (VR).
Joan (polite) Perhaps you two gentleman may agree to end your silly little war.
(VR) I have no such orders - He can leave.
Julian: Would you accept a peace treaty ?
(VR) After your vicious sneak attack I think not and we have no interest in your 13 gold. German Honour Demands Satisfaction.
Julian: Is there any hope for peace.
VR Tell that witch Theodora German Honour demand Satisfaction
Julian: I spit on German Honour.
Spits on VR. VR punches julian in the face and applies a knee to the groin.
Joan (Furious) Stop fighting in here - this is the war room (Plagarized from Dr Strangelove)
Julian is dragged out groaning.
Joan (Cautious) Well what do you have to say.
VR recounts details of previous parts.
Joan (Polite) Well Germany has always been honest with us.
VR: This is an ambit claim (Australian for offer that will probably be rejected) but an Alliance against Byzatium and Right of Passage ?
Joan (gracious) agreed.
VR (taken aback) Thank you Madame President. Germany intends to strike East and South. If you attack to your South you can capture 3 cities. It will be difficult to coordinate our forces.
Napoleon: Sounds easy.
VR excellent. Joan waves VR to leave.
Joan: Now Napolean what is your plan ?
Napoleon: Rommell is an excellent general - Theodora will throw every soldier she has to defend Constantinople. If we attack south we can capture 3 cities without weakening our Aztec frontier
Joan: Are you aware of what the fall of Constantinople to the Germans would mean ?
Nap: We and our German allies win the War.
Joan: Presently Germany is our cultural inferior and is more powerful. With the wonders of Constantinople Germany will be our cultural superior.
Nap: So what is the plan?
Joan: Assemble an army in Paris and march on Constantinople directly
Get it before the Germans at ANY COST.
Nap: What about the Aztecs
Joan: I'll sell that little savage printing press cheap - anyway he is busy getting his soldiers killed by the Greeks.
Rommell may be a much smarter General than you Napolean but I am smater than Bismark.
NOTE: The lesson here is for a war with a weak foe don't ask a strong neighbor in as ally as Germany did. The real victor of the Byzantine war was Joan of Arc, ruler of Paris and Constantinople.
Also Joan can pump out Med Inf swarms like nobody else.
Nobody in this war had horses.
Sorry about the French Bashing but I am a New Zealander at Heart and a greenie. I have no problems with the French people and can speak bad French.
SCENE PARIS. President Joan's War Room. Marshall Napoleon is present.
Enter the Byzantine Ambassador Julian.
Joan (Cautious): Welcome Ambassador. I hear you are at war with Germany. Why ?
Julian: The Germans viciously attacked us! We are weak and Germany is your biggest strategic rival. What do you want for an alliance against Germany ?
Joan (Facetious) 50 Tanks
Julian - but the closest city to Paris is Dortmund and they have a wine supply you need.
Joan (annoyed) We buy that wine at a fair price and the germans sell us excellent dyes at a fair price - whereas your little spice scam what was that ? 2 turns of spice for Republic? What a Rip off.
Napoleon: I suggest you leave.
Joan: Wait - Von Runstead will be here soon - maybe I can be a mediator.
Enter Ambassador Von Runstead (VR).
Joan (polite) Perhaps you two gentleman may agree to end your silly little war.
(VR) I have no such orders - He can leave.
Julian: Would you accept a peace treaty ?
(VR) After your vicious sneak attack I think not and we have no interest in your 13 gold. German Honour Demands Satisfaction.
Julian: Is there any hope for peace.
VR Tell that witch Theodora German Honour demand Satisfaction
Julian: I spit on German Honour.
Spits on VR. VR punches julian in the face and applies a knee to the groin.
Joan (Furious) Stop fighting in here - this is the war room (Plagarized from Dr Strangelove)
Julian is dragged out groaning.
Joan (Cautious) Well what do you have to say.
VR recounts details of previous parts.
Joan (Polite) Well Germany has always been honest with us.
VR: This is an ambit claim (Australian for offer that will probably be rejected) but an Alliance against Byzatium and Right of Passage ?
Joan (gracious) agreed.
VR (taken aback) Thank you Madame President. Germany intends to strike East and South. If you attack to your South you can capture 3 cities. It will be difficult to coordinate our forces.
Napoleon: Sounds easy.
VR excellent. Joan waves VR to leave.
Joan: Now Napolean what is your plan ?
Napoleon: Rommell is an excellent general - Theodora will throw every soldier she has to defend Constantinople. If we attack south we can capture 3 cities without weakening our Aztec frontier
Joan: Are you aware of what the fall of Constantinople to the Germans would mean ?
Nap: We and our German allies win the War.
Joan: Presently Germany is our cultural inferior and is more powerful. With the wonders of Constantinople Germany will be our cultural superior.
Nap: So what is the plan?
Joan: Assemble an army in Paris and march on Constantinople directly
Get it before the Germans at ANY COST.
Nap: What about the Aztecs
Joan: I'll sell that little savage printing press cheap - anyway he is busy getting his soldiers killed by the Greeks.
Rommell may be a much smarter General than you Napolean but I am smater than Bismark.
NOTE: The lesson here is for a war with a weak foe don't ask a strong neighbor in as ally as Germany did. The real victor of the Byzantine war was Joan of Arc, ruler of Paris and Constantinople.
Also Joan can pump out Med Inf swarms like nobody else.
Nobody in this war had horses.