Tycho
AFK Forum Warrior
- Joined
- Jul 31, 2011
- Messages
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Humphrey the Crow
"Welcome, all of you, to the halls of our people."
Humphrey was two steps down from Lucius on the staircase, but he still looked down on the man. The portly pale Byzantian had a absurdly small head, squeaky voice, and all around attitude that grated on Humphrey's nerves like sandpaper on skin.
Two days they had been in the capital of the nation known as Byzantium, and while it was a nice, cultured place, it did not suit well with Humphrey. The people of the city they named Constantinople were friendly enough, but that was stretching it. Shops did not permit these outsiders from Washington, the people watched them with those pale eyes of theirs, and the officials that talked to the scouts from Amerika had a sharp manner around them, one that many of the scouts felt was racism towards these Amerikans. The trueborn Amerikans of Zach's people were better off; they looked mostly like the Byzantians if only slightly tanner from wandering in the wildlands, but the Vietemese and Chinese people were whispered about behind their backs and the comments were not always nice. Halfway through the first full day, merry Shang, who was the most polite, humorous, and positive of the scouts snapped a Byzantine's neck and cracked the skulls of two others before it took seven people to pull him off of another he was trying to kill by bashing a cobblestone into his face. The Byzantine had cheated at a game of chance, then had responded with several insults about Shang's people before he met his violent end. They almost executed Shang, but pardoned him after a "charitable donation" by Humphrey which included twenty gold coins.
The hall itself was made out of timber and stone, proud and tall, over twenty meters tall. The cavernous Hall of the Masses was the largest part, and the highest arching part of the building, close to thirty meters high, flickering torches adorning the walls and open air windows looking out from the hill that it was set upon onto the stone and mortar housing of Constantinople.
"Nice hall," said the Vietemese man Sparrow. "Hope you do not mind our muddy buts." A wide grin covered his face.
The nostrils of pudgy Lucius flared a bit as he replied. "We don't mind at all, but do not touch anything in the hall. You may sit in some of the chairs around here." Courteous speak, with heavy hints of bitterness and a thinly veiled mask of displeasure. He wasn't about to mouth off to anyone; Handsome Jack was eight feet tall, preferring to use the staff he had carved out of an oak tree with his own hands nearly as round and thick as the original tree.
"No problem." The men took their seats around the hall, touching the walls and the bas-reliefs carved into the stone depicting the great deeds of the Byzantian ancestors. Lucius left the hall wearing a face that had some resemblence of curdled milk. The second the thick oaken doors shut, several of the men roared with laughter about the man. Humphrey himself smiled as well; it was hard to act serious around a toad like that.
All the rest of the day, it seemed like the portly servant was taking his revenge. Other people came and went through the oaken doors with ease, but the Amerikans were left to sit in the Hall of the Peoples for most of the day, the sun cresting up over the village, up to the center of the sky, held aloft for a few hours, and then sent back towards the edge of the horizon. No food or drink was served, and even though the hall had been cool during the morning, it began to swelter with the heat. Even a person who was cold blooded and didn't warm well like Handsome Jack took off their furs and lounged around, slothlike and bored.
A servant woman bustled through the hall on her way to the oaken doors, on her way no doubt to meet the Caesar when Humphrey clamped down on her shoulder with a firm hand. She turned around slowly with a petrified look on her face, looking into Humphrey's sharp teeth and rheumy eyes. "Could you be a dear and take a message for the Caesar?" Humphrey asked in a sweet voice dripping with venom. "Tell. Him. We. Must. Meet. With. Him. Now. And we will just pop down to the city for some sport. Shang and Handsome Jack don't cheat at gambling, but all of you Byzantians do. I'm afraid I can not stop them if they do something. Do you understand?"
The servant nodded slowly. Humphrey smiled at her, "Could you bring some food as well? We are rather... starving right now, and could eat just about anything."
She bolted back the way she came, returning three minutes later with serving wenches in tow, who set out wooden tables and dishes of simple black bread, cooked turkeys, roasted apples, and some cheese, wine and water on the side. Humphrey smiled at them all in that venemous smile of his; it was about time that they got fed. If he had to wait any longer, he would have marched through those oaken doors and twisted that rat Lucius's head off his shoulders and rolled it across the hall.
Finally, about a third of way into the afternoon, the great oaken doors clanked open on creaking hinges, Lucius stepping through. "You may enter Amerikans," he said crisply.
"About damn time." Humphrey stretched his legs and his arms, patted a full stomach and marched up the steps with his men. Their discipline would have shamed an organized army, shown up by grubby scouts.
Humphrey paused for a second as he stood bye Lucius. "I don't know if you know this little pigeon, but I am not a man to toyed with. If I ever see you do what happened here today, your head is coming off your shoulders faster than you can blink. Try to get a shocked expression on your face though as you realize you've been decapitated, I rather like that in my ornaments."
Lucius turned pale but responded steadily. "I hope you enjoyed your time here, Amerikan, but threats do not come to your lips easily."
Chuckling at that, Humphrey whispered. "That was not a threat little pidge, that was truth right there. If I should happen to visit Constantinople again in my lifetime, myself and my men had better be treated with better courtesy. We are a peaceful people, but I do have counsel with Victor."
He got the hint, sidestepping to allow Humphrey to pass, bowing as he did so. Humphrey wasn't the man to be overly joyous on most occasions, but right now he was so ecstatic he probably could have jumped into the air and clapped his feet together.
The next room was long, lined with columns hewn out of wood and logs, polished to perfection, with roosting torches covering them. The skylight was glass, Humphrey noted. Obviously this little city had realized how to make it, while the Amerikans did not. A fine trade resource that could be for the city.
At the end of the massive annex was a raised platform, steps ascending up to it. A throne made of hard stone without a single comfort or pillow held the man that Humphrey had sought to talk to: the Caesar of Byzantium.
A hooked nose, bushy eyebrows, neat black hair and olive skin, a crown of olive leaves, and hardset blue eyes. "Hello travelers of Amerika." It was a rich, fluid voice, one that could talk you off a cliff, make you believe what he wanted you to, or compel you to answer him. "You have seen the sites of our flourishing city. May I ask how you enjoyed it?"
"Everything was good except for the veritable hostility we had." Humphrey's rheumy eyes watched the man carefully. Not a single twitch or movement besides his lips and the inflation and deflation of his stomach as he breathed. "There was some trouble early on. One of your citizens cheated at a game, and proceeded to call my friend a lackwit fool of a boy whose father had courted a goat before he was born. His people don't take things like that lightly."
"No matter, it was Kalin after all. A bad apple, not many will miss the man. A greedy bastard of a noble and a baseborn woman, he was not right in his mind."
"Mmmm."
"But you have found my people here in Byzantium. What brings you hear to Constantinople from your far flung lands and hills of Amerika?"
"Not much, scouting for our leader and his rather deceased father. Orders are orders after all, and I obey what I am told to do."
"Rather deceased you say?"
"Well you don't see him very well walking with us, do you? If so, we need fire and a very large decapitation tool to kill the wight. Although it wouldn't have surprised me to see him alive in truth. Flung off a cliff, stabbed, washed away and drowned in water, and came into our little tribe's village three days later to kill the usurper."
The Caesar stiffened at that. "What did you say again?"
"He survived being flung off a cliff, being stabbed, drowning, and returned to our village. He brought more people to the village after he supposedly talked to the gods." Humphrey laughed at that. "Gods tend to speak to one man after all, so it was mostly a coincidence we found Shang's people."
"I see."
"I have a few questions to ask you Caesar, if you do not mind."
"Of course not."
"Do you mean to cause my people harm?"
"Not while I am alive, and my bloodline thrives. We are a just people, and we would never attack a neighbor that does not harbor covetous eyes upon our land."
"Good, good. Second question, do you know of any other peoples nearby?"
"None that we know of besides your folk right now. A group of fine Byzantine men were sent out to explore the wildlands, but we have been unsucessful in finding any other people."
"Ah. Final question, what is to the west and the south?"
"Forests. Leafy or needled, they stretch far and wide. Or so my grandfather told my father, and he told me." The Caesar stroked his beard. "No one knows what lies to the south now. It has been generations since we moved from this area."
"Thank you for your time Caesar." There had been some information to gain, and that knoweledge would help them out later on their explorations. Humphrey motioned for the men to leave the hall, all of them forming up in single file and waiting for him to lead them out. "We thank you for your time Caesar, and we hope to return one day to this place."
"Wait sir." Humphrey stopped and rotated around to the Caesar one last time. The man's eyebrows had smashed together like bears, and his mouth was turned downwards in a frown. "What was the name of the leader that died but did not?"
"Zach sir."
The Caesar leaned back in his throne and smiled at the Amerikans. "Thank you," he said. "May your journey be safe and the stars guide you well."
Humphrey smirked as he left the hall. "If there was no danger or risk, it would not be an exciting journey now would it?"
"So do they know?"
"About what?"
"Vir quisnam would exsisto Caesar, what else?"
"By the sound of it, yes he is. He's the one who would challenge the Wrath of the East."
The other man tapped his fingers on the table. "We still don't know," he insisted. "How do we not know the the Easterner is the one that the tales speak of."
"Oh he is, but he plays a different part."
"Still though, do you think that they will figure this out on their own? You gave away quite a bit of information to those outsider Amerikans, and I don't like it."
"They asked questions of me, and I had to know if that man Zach was the one that we speak of."
"I don't know at this part Caesar, we have to consult the legends again."
"And what will they till us, hmmm? Not bloody much, I'll tell you."
"Maybe Zach is the Wrath of the East. Circles within circles this is turning out to be."
"Indeed it is. So we need to get rid of most of the circles."
"Consult the legends again?"
"No you fool, burn the tablets."
The man was shocked into silence by that, his drumming fingers silenced. "We can't burn those," he spoke slowly. "Those are the only tablets your grandfather brought back from the Wildlands, and he said explicitly not to destroy them, lest the wrath of the gods descend upon us."
"Crack them open vertically then. You will still be able to keep them, won't you?"
"Of course I will brother, but I can tell you that the priests will not approve of this."
"Bugger the priests," Caesar said to his brother. The sun was dipping down over the horizon to signal nightime. "Those tablets hold the answer. 'Look deep inside of your own knoweledge', that's what they said."
"I hope that it isn't metaphorical, otherwise the priests will be coming after you, as well as most of the devout population of Constantinople."
"Aye they shall, but only if I'm wrong. But we can't tell unless we try do we?"
"Welcome, all of you, to the halls of our people."
Humphrey was two steps down from Lucius on the staircase, but he still looked down on the man. The portly pale Byzantian had a absurdly small head, squeaky voice, and all around attitude that grated on Humphrey's nerves like sandpaper on skin.
Two days they had been in the capital of the nation known as Byzantium, and while it was a nice, cultured place, it did not suit well with Humphrey. The people of the city they named Constantinople were friendly enough, but that was stretching it. Shops did not permit these outsiders from Washington, the people watched them with those pale eyes of theirs, and the officials that talked to the scouts from Amerika had a sharp manner around them, one that many of the scouts felt was racism towards these Amerikans. The trueborn Amerikans of Zach's people were better off; they looked mostly like the Byzantians if only slightly tanner from wandering in the wildlands, but the Vietemese and Chinese people were whispered about behind their backs and the comments were not always nice. Halfway through the first full day, merry Shang, who was the most polite, humorous, and positive of the scouts snapped a Byzantine's neck and cracked the skulls of two others before it took seven people to pull him off of another he was trying to kill by bashing a cobblestone into his face. The Byzantine had cheated at a game of chance, then had responded with several insults about Shang's people before he met his violent end. They almost executed Shang, but pardoned him after a "charitable donation" by Humphrey which included twenty gold coins.
The hall itself was made out of timber and stone, proud and tall, over twenty meters tall. The cavernous Hall of the Masses was the largest part, and the highest arching part of the building, close to thirty meters high, flickering torches adorning the walls and open air windows looking out from the hill that it was set upon onto the stone and mortar housing of Constantinople.
"Nice hall," said the Vietemese man Sparrow. "Hope you do not mind our muddy buts." A wide grin covered his face.
The nostrils of pudgy Lucius flared a bit as he replied. "We don't mind at all, but do not touch anything in the hall. You may sit in some of the chairs around here." Courteous speak, with heavy hints of bitterness and a thinly veiled mask of displeasure. He wasn't about to mouth off to anyone; Handsome Jack was eight feet tall, preferring to use the staff he had carved out of an oak tree with his own hands nearly as round and thick as the original tree.
"No problem." The men took their seats around the hall, touching the walls and the bas-reliefs carved into the stone depicting the great deeds of the Byzantian ancestors. Lucius left the hall wearing a face that had some resemblence of curdled milk. The second the thick oaken doors shut, several of the men roared with laughter about the man. Humphrey himself smiled as well; it was hard to act serious around a toad like that.
All the rest of the day, it seemed like the portly servant was taking his revenge. Other people came and went through the oaken doors with ease, but the Amerikans were left to sit in the Hall of the Peoples for most of the day, the sun cresting up over the village, up to the center of the sky, held aloft for a few hours, and then sent back towards the edge of the horizon. No food or drink was served, and even though the hall had been cool during the morning, it began to swelter with the heat. Even a person who was cold blooded and didn't warm well like Handsome Jack took off their furs and lounged around, slothlike and bored.
A servant woman bustled through the hall on her way to the oaken doors, on her way no doubt to meet the Caesar when Humphrey clamped down on her shoulder with a firm hand. She turned around slowly with a petrified look on her face, looking into Humphrey's sharp teeth and rheumy eyes. "Could you be a dear and take a message for the Caesar?" Humphrey asked in a sweet voice dripping with venom. "Tell. Him. We. Must. Meet. With. Him. Now. And we will just pop down to the city for some sport. Shang and Handsome Jack don't cheat at gambling, but all of you Byzantians do. I'm afraid I can not stop them if they do something. Do you understand?"
The servant nodded slowly. Humphrey smiled at her, "Could you bring some food as well? We are rather... starving right now, and could eat just about anything."
She bolted back the way she came, returning three minutes later with serving wenches in tow, who set out wooden tables and dishes of simple black bread, cooked turkeys, roasted apples, and some cheese, wine and water on the side. Humphrey smiled at them all in that venemous smile of his; it was about time that they got fed. If he had to wait any longer, he would have marched through those oaken doors and twisted that rat Lucius's head off his shoulders and rolled it across the hall.
Finally, about a third of way into the afternoon, the great oaken doors clanked open on creaking hinges, Lucius stepping through. "You may enter Amerikans," he said crisply.
"About damn time." Humphrey stretched his legs and his arms, patted a full stomach and marched up the steps with his men. Their discipline would have shamed an organized army, shown up by grubby scouts.
Humphrey paused for a second as he stood bye Lucius. "I don't know if you know this little pigeon, but I am not a man to toyed with. If I ever see you do what happened here today, your head is coming off your shoulders faster than you can blink. Try to get a shocked expression on your face though as you realize you've been decapitated, I rather like that in my ornaments."
Lucius turned pale but responded steadily. "I hope you enjoyed your time here, Amerikan, but threats do not come to your lips easily."
Chuckling at that, Humphrey whispered. "That was not a threat little pidge, that was truth right there. If I should happen to visit Constantinople again in my lifetime, myself and my men had better be treated with better courtesy. We are a peaceful people, but I do have counsel with Victor."
He got the hint, sidestepping to allow Humphrey to pass, bowing as he did so. Humphrey wasn't the man to be overly joyous on most occasions, but right now he was so ecstatic he probably could have jumped into the air and clapped his feet together.
The next room was long, lined with columns hewn out of wood and logs, polished to perfection, with roosting torches covering them. The skylight was glass, Humphrey noted. Obviously this little city had realized how to make it, while the Amerikans did not. A fine trade resource that could be for the city.
At the end of the massive annex was a raised platform, steps ascending up to it. A throne made of hard stone without a single comfort or pillow held the man that Humphrey had sought to talk to: the Caesar of Byzantium.
A hooked nose, bushy eyebrows, neat black hair and olive skin, a crown of olive leaves, and hardset blue eyes. "Hello travelers of Amerika." It was a rich, fluid voice, one that could talk you off a cliff, make you believe what he wanted you to, or compel you to answer him. "You have seen the sites of our flourishing city. May I ask how you enjoyed it?"
"Everything was good except for the veritable hostility we had." Humphrey's rheumy eyes watched the man carefully. Not a single twitch or movement besides his lips and the inflation and deflation of his stomach as he breathed. "There was some trouble early on. One of your citizens cheated at a game, and proceeded to call my friend a lackwit fool of a boy whose father had courted a goat before he was born. His people don't take things like that lightly."
"No matter, it was Kalin after all. A bad apple, not many will miss the man. A greedy bastard of a noble and a baseborn woman, he was not right in his mind."
"Mmmm."
"But you have found my people here in Byzantium. What brings you hear to Constantinople from your far flung lands and hills of Amerika?"
"Not much, scouting for our leader and his rather deceased father. Orders are orders after all, and I obey what I am told to do."
"Rather deceased you say?"
"Well you don't see him very well walking with us, do you? If so, we need fire and a very large decapitation tool to kill the wight. Although it wouldn't have surprised me to see him alive in truth. Flung off a cliff, stabbed, washed away and drowned in water, and came into our little tribe's village three days later to kill the usurper."
The Caesar stiffened at that. "What did you say again?"
"He survived being flung off a cliff, being stabbed, drowning, and returned to our village. He brought more people to the village after he supposedly talked to the gods." Humphrey laughed at that. "Gods tend to speak to one man after all, so it was mostly a coincidence we found Shang's people."
"I see."
"I have a few questions to ask you Caesar, if you do not mind."
"Of course not."
"Do you mean to cause my people harm?"
"Not while I am alive, and my bloodline thrives. We are a just people, and we would never attack a neighbor that does not harbor covetous eyes upon our land."
"Good, good. Second question, do you know of any other peoples nearby?"
"None that we know of besides your folk right now. A group of fine Byzantine men were sent out to explore the wildlands, but we have been unsucessful in finding any other people."
"Ah. Final question, what is to the west and the south?"
"Forests. Leafy or needled, they stretch far and wide. Or so my grandfather told my father, and he told me." The Caesar stroked his beard. "No one knows what lies to the south now. It has been generations since we moved from this area."
"Thank you for your time Caesar." There had been some information to gain, and that knoweledge would help them out later on their explorations. Humphrey motioned for the men to leave the hall, all of them forming up in single file and waiting for him to lead them out. "We thank you for your time Caesar, and we hope to return one day to this place."
"Wait sir." Humphrey stopped and rotated around to the Caesar one last time. The man's eyebrows had smashed together like bears, and his mouth was turned downwards in a frown. "What was the name of the leader that died but did not?"
"Zach sir."
The Caesar leaned back in his throne and smiled at the Amerikans. "Thank you," he said. "May your journey be safe and the stars guide you well."
Humphrey smirked as he left the hall. "If there was no danger or risk, it would not be an exciting journey now would it?"
"So do they know?"
"About what?"
"Vir quisnam would exsisto Caesar, what else?"
"By the sound of it, yes he is. He's the one who would challenge the Wrath of the East."
The other man tapped his fingers on the table. "We still don't know," he insisted. "How do we not know the the Easterner is the one that the tales speak of."
"Oh he is, but he plays a different part."
"Still though, do you think that they will figure this out on their own? You gave away quite a bit of information to those outsider Amerikans, and I don't like it."
"They asked questions of me, and I had to know if that man Zach was the one that we speak of."
"I don't know at this part Caesar, we have to consult the legends again."
"And what will they till us, hmmm? Not bloody much, I'll tell you."
"Maybe Zach is the Wrath of the East. Circles within circles this is turning out to be."
"Indeed it is. So we need to get rid of most of the circles."
"Consult the legends again?"
"No you fool, burn the tablets."
The man was shocked into silence by that, his drumming fingers silenced. "We can't burn those," he spoke slowly. "Those are the only tablets your grandfather brought back from the Wildlands, and he said explicitly not to destroy them, lest the wrath of the gods descend upon us."
"Crack them open vertically then. You will still be able to keep them, won't you?"
"Of course I will brother, but I can tell you that the priests will not approve of this."
"Bugger the priests," Caesar said to his brother. The sun was dipping down over the horizon to signal nightime. "Those tablets hold the answer. 'Look deep inside of your own knoweledge', that's what they said."
"I hope that it isn't metaphorical, otherwise the priests will be coming after you, as well as most of the devout population of Constantinople."
"Aye they shall, but only if I'm wrong. But we can't tell unless we try do we?"