It's A Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad, World

As for South America... no comment at the moment as I make considerations.

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The indecisiveness of the imperialist Manx are only matched with their stupidity and for their love of sheep. Because I am a nice Chavez, I shall give the Manx an idea of what they're going to so they can worry about more important problems such as which ewe to beckon tonight.

The foreign imperialists will leave Brazil and they will leave South America in general. The people's will of the united Chavezland dictates that our glorious republic be supreme, for the simple fact that we are not spineless cowards. For that, you must go to the land of bad teeth to see. The only thing weaker than a Manxman on the battlefield is their own currency.

Omega124 said:

The indecisiveness of the imperialist Manx are only matched with their stupidity and for their love of sheep. Because I am a nice Chavez, I shall give the Manx an idea of what they're going to so they can worry about more important problems such as which ewe to beckon tonight.

The foreign imperialists will leave Brazil and they will leave South America in general. The people's will of the united Chavezland dictates that our glorious republic be supreme, for the simple fact that we are not spineless cowards. For that, you must go to the land of bad teeth to see. The only thing weaker than a Manxman on the battlefield is their own currency.

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The Emperor, a divine figure who preaches holy words, is not amused by your clearly lustful, sinful lies that reek in disgrace and shows only hope pitiful you are. We are also amused that your focusing on one imperial power instead of all three (even Srbija) as notion that your rule is governed not by effective council. Our tanks will not fender under your pitiful reign; your inferior nation will be given a chance to bow before the supremacy of Man. Surrender will save you and your comrades from the fires of Hell, for I am a agent of Heaven who has been chosen by divine right! Glory to Man as we make our glory known to this world: sin will burn and we will be the burners of the sinners mortal coil in the name of the Creator and the Emperor!

Failure to comply to Manx demands will result in many deaths and end the independence of your country!

Ailedhoo said:

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"Why, yes, I do look silly wearing this sombrero and flannel shirt. However, compared to the Manx threats towards the Republic of Chavezland, this sombrero is as serious as a Greek Tragedy. Speaking of which, the Society of Friends, amiright? Well, it's more of a comedy. Either way, seeing those Greeks run around island hopping, pretending to be the American Marines of the 1940s as if the world cared about them and their plight is adorable. Wait, I take that back, comparing the Society to Americans is sadly an insult to the fat burger munchers."

*beat*

"Oh wait, I'm supposed to be adressing the Manx today? I'm sorry, the fact that they're so inconsequential outside of golden political satire made me forget I was supposed to criticizing them. What can I honestly say? Their Emperor feels so inadequate, that he has to make his spineless citizenry, comprised mostly of sheep, worship him. Well, if I was the Emperor, I'd have to have sheep worship me, because no human would even want to jeer at me. Anyways, I elected to throw an cocaine embargo upon the Manx. I figured this will bring reason to them because anyone who currently supports their failure of a leader is on the best drugs in the world, which is clearly ours. The Emperor will be on his knees by the end of the week.

Chavez out"

*mic drop*

The Imperium has over the last past years been conducting a war on drugs policy; however the clear sign that drug cartels, sponsored by "the government" of Chavez, clearly shows that Magnus III was not as grand on warring against drugs as he should have been. Hence Illiam II declares a harsher war on drugs, ensuring full criminalisation and hopefully a decline.

OOC: clue rise in Manx drug related crime.

Ailedhoo said:

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Chavez, laughing at yet another Western Imperialist gaffe

"I know the Manx think that they rule the world and thus that Manx laws apply in Chavezland, but I, like the doctor at the Emperor's birth, must deliver the bad news. Chavezland is not, nor ever was, a part of Manx. We do not follow your laws, we do not allow Manx personnel in our nation for the "war on drugs", and we are not listening to anymore drivel from you.

Repeat after me: Cocaine is legal in Chavezland. There is no illegal drug trade, there is no cartel barons running half the nation, and we can spend our money on more productive stuff such as 30 foot golden statues of me. The war on drugs is the biggest scam of humanity since your cult came around, and rather than wasting our money incarcerating half our population, we can afford universal health care. Since your Manx, I assume you don't know what health care is. Maybe instead of paying for old men in dresses singing praises for the only man in the world with no skeleton, you could had tried hiring a few doctors. At least some dentists, please. Seriously, those teeth are horrendous."

Thorvald of Lym said:

TO: Supreme Commander and Semi-Glorious Comrade King-President and Allmighty Emperor Chester Jimmy Giancarlo Stalin-Hitler the First and Only, Ruler of the Hippy Federation of Soviet Germans
FROM: Bishop Dragomir, a servant of the servants of God

Let not your recent diversion from the path of peace drag you down into sin and wretchedness. Let us set aside our differences to confront the true enemy of humanity, the vociferous Illiam and his slavish empire. In exchange for your support in our crusade and the cessation of German aid to rebel forces, we shall cede all currently contested claims with your state.

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Do you mean... you want me fight Imperium of Man? Why in the name of all things green would I do that? Put yourself into my shoes here, Bishop Dragomir: would you gobble up the remnants of a falling Empire, or would you attempt to chip away at the might of a rising behemoth? it's not like you can do too much, most of your territory is now independent and at war with your nation and my army of 80.000 is camped 2 miles away from Belgrad, ready to besiege it. Should I mention 100.000 of my troops ready at my borders? or 15.000 in each now-independent former nationalist movement?

You'll need more than cessation of "contested claims" (which are already mine anyway) to convince me to declare war on the Imperium of Man. The most you can do now is to make me stop my rampage through your nation.
Long live Comrade me!

Leader: King James XIII of Scotland
Capital: St Andrews


Too long have we languished under the rule of the English-Manx oppressors, too long has Scottish Independence been denied for its people. We are Scotland, brothers and sisters, and we will resist - so long as those one hundred brave men exist we will fight. Independence is our birthright and we will take it! Stand with me today my people: We fight!

To the Scottish rebel "King" James "XIII of Scotland"

I am a merciful man at heart: hence why I have bothered to send a letter to a traitor to the Imperium of Man. The Grand Duke Thomase II of Scotland will be tasked with dealing with the troubling rebellion in Scotland, the one that you claim against the Imperium. Tell me: do you really think you can succeed in succeeding from one of the strongest powers, if not the strongest power, in the world? You think can question the divine plan? Question my plan?

We are amused.

Still: I offer you a chance to redeem yourself and summit before your Emperor. We will be forgiving in return for you and your fellow would be rebels repaying any damages you have caused to imperial and private property, as well as commence to hard labour as a pay off. Again: I am in a mood of mercy; it is a good idea I remain in such mood for your sake.

Know that I will commission my imperial guard to Scotland to help the Grand Duke deal with your pesky ruffians should you refuse my merciful demands and I may use my alliances to call for a common stance against the agencies of chaos that you seem so tragically to be a pawn of.

Know that we will be prepared to unleash a zero tolerance policy towards rebellion that will be at maximum harshness if necessary.

We cannot have dissent, especially such violent dissent you plot against the humble peoples of the Imperium of Man, many citizens eagerly within Scotland to our callings and with loyalty to me.

Hence now I cry: be of good heart and accept my mercy at notion that you will cease your pitiful claimant to a "Kingdom" of Scotland and that you will apologise for attempting to cause such panic in the Imperial Realms. Fail to comply and I will have to... not be so kind to you. We cannot have dissent after all.

Be considering and take my offer.

Your Emperor Illiam II of the Imperium of Man, centred in the Isles of Man which include the Isle of Man, Ireland and Great Britain, the later containing Cornwell, England, Scotland and Wales.

In response to the "Emperor's" demands a messenger has been sent bearing the following message.

We will never accept you terms, we will never accept any terms until Scotland is free.
To not try our patience and send us letters signed "Your Emperor" you will never be our Emperor, we will not yield to your Empire. We will not respect the authority of any man who claims to do the work of your Empire. Among the Scots you have no authority, no loving subjects, no empire.
If we need to prove it to you by the strength of our arms and the courage of our hearts we will not falter to. If we need to prove it to you with our blood - mingled with yours on the field of battle - we will be there to fight you. If you pursue us to our last breath to try and scrape some shred of loyalty from us then you will fail; the Scots will die free. Either fighting for their freedom or living in their own country - this is the promise we make: All Scots will die free.

Robert Can't said:

In response to the "Emperor's" demands a messenger has been sent bearing the following message.

We will never accept you terms, we will never accept any terms until Scotland is free.
To not try our patience and send us letters signed "Your Emperor" you will never be our Emperor, we will not yield to your Empire. We will not respect the authority of any man who claims to do the work of your Empire. Among the Scots you have no authority, no loving subjects, no empire.
If we need to prove it to you by the strength of our arms and the courage of our hearts we will not falter to. If we need to prove it to you with our blood - mingled with yours on the field of battle - we will be there to fight you. If you pursue us to our last breath to try and scrape some shred of loyalty from us then you will fail; the Scots will die free. Either fighting for their freedom or living in their own country - this is the promise we make: All Scots will die free.

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The following is on Manx Radio...

To all citizens of the Imperium and the traitors who dare defy the order of the divine: heed your Emperor's words!

I, Illiam II of Man, had offered James [insert family name here] the mercy of chance: the chance to lay down his arms and be forgiven by his Emperor. I offered mercy and compassion: James pay back in further treachery and now threatens to disrupt the order of not only Scotland but the Imperium itself. This self proclaimed "king" believes he has the support of the people of Scotland, when their loyalty is set from the barons, mayors and bishops to the counts to the dukes to the Grand Duke of Scotland and to the Emperor of Man. I am certain that a significant number of Scots have turned traitors and now wish to savagely pillage their own land, while many more remain loyal to Man.

I ensure you all that I will seek to liberate the loyal Scots from the evils of the traitors.

The traitors have proclaimed that the Scots will die outside the Imperium by one matter or another. This means the lives of the loyalties are in danger of the "freedom fighters" that now plot the massacre of those loyal to the union of the Isles of Man. Together the loyal imperialists who strive to protect the legacy of their Emperor will have a united reward, while the traitors will know only punishment after turning down my offer of mercy.

I ensure you: we will not show mercy to traitors now.

By degree of my lawful word I task Grand Duke Thomase II of Scotland to dispatch forces to deal with the deviant threats. All dukes under Thomase's command are to reaffirm their allegiances as the counts in turn followed by the barons, bishops and mayors. The Grand Dukes of England and Ireland will be summoned to also gather their levies to cleanse Scotland of the plague that infects it. Thomase II must, if he wishes to remain Grand Duke of Scotland, remove the pests at once. I will not underestimate James so I will apply a patch of my imperial guard to help ensure victory. Meanwhile I commission divisions of the imperial navy to surround Scotland's waters so that we can count supply lines and impose a embargo upon the traitors, that will in many ways be a blockade that will block weapons, defences and other military supplies from getting into the rebels' hands. I also commission the air force to set divisions to guard the air space; Scotland will as of now be a no fly zone, with only the imperial military and commercial airlines with imperial approval of sending cargo in and out of Scotland be allowed in the air, the later approved commercial planes must by law be escorted by jet fighters with loyalty to the Emperor.

The rebels will not be given the oxygen of external supplies.

I will also order a special division of troops leaded by the Duke of Orkney, with support of the local Count of Fife, to commence, at once, a landing around St Andrews so we may commence a blockade of the "capital" of the rebellion and lay the foundations of the hopeful surrender of the foolish James. I give permission of our latest weopon, the “Caorthannach” Hover Flame Tank, to help with the assault. This combine with our rocket artillery, off-shore bombardment from our cruisers and the birds of prey keeping the skies safe... we will begin to lay down the rebels.

All in all: I declare a fox hunt against these traitors! Those who slay or capture rebel leaders will be given my personal blessing and financial rewards for their troubles, all measured on the value of the leader. Bounty hunters and local figures wishing to enlist as volunteer militants in the matter are hence encourage to contact your local recruitment agency. Supplies in and out of Scotland will be set by the commission of the Grand Duke of Scotland, who is instructed to ensure that no supplies heed the rebels. In the end I want to see the traitors strangled for their threats against the humble worshippers of the Creator.

Show the traitors no mercy! Bring glory to the Imperium and your Emperor!

Long live the Imperium and may Scotland enjoy the fruits it gains from being a member of the Imperium!

Glory ever after!

oh god megs stop please my sides


Sjrbija has begun full mobilization of its armed forces. The 7th Army has rallied outside Madrid to confront the Catalans, while the 4th and 12th Armies are preparing to strike back at the German invaders. The Greek garrison has been fortified, temporarily quelling the dissent sparked by the recent terrorist attacks. Across the world, colonial garrisons have begun open attacks on Manx co-occupiers. Everywhere else, away forces dig in for a bloody defence, anticipating the ravenous hounds congregating to bite off as much of the Empire's extremities as they can.

Conversely, the Society of Friends has been downgraded on the State Threat Index to "gnat". Elements of the Mediterranean Fleet not assigned to shelling Catalan positions have begun a quarantine of the Aegean Sea. When asked why not simply bomb the truckers to kingdom come, Marshal Miljan Mihailović replied: "Keep your friends close, and your enemies closer."

In response to the message given to the Scots people the Independence movement decided to win over the support of the remaining Scots Barons, Earls, Lords and other members of the nobility beneath Thomase the Oppressor. Gathering a vast majority of said nobles the Kingdom of Scotland has issued its declaration of independence.

Signatories include but are not limited to:

Ivar Duke of Rothesay
Lord David of Kirkcudbrightshire
Duncan Laird of Roxburghe
Henry Sinclair, Duke of Montrose
John Atholl, Duke of Atholl
Earl David of Mar and Kellie
Earl Robert of Galloway
James Earl of Roxburgh
Laird Jennings of Lanarkshire
David Mormaer of Fife
Donnchadh, Earl of Lennox
Margaret, Countess of Mar
Laird Donald of Dunfaurlin
Bishop Harrison of Kirkcaldy
William, Earl of Menteith
Walter, Earl of Strathearn
Findláech, Mormaer of Moray
Malcolm, Earl of Ross
Countess Elizabeth of Sunderland
The Bishops of Aberdeen, Argyll, Brechin, Caithness, Dunblane, Dunkeld, Galloway, Glasgow, Ross and St Andrews (Representing 10 out of the 13 Bishoprics)
The Clan leaders of the 24 most influential clans (14 Highland, 10 Lowland)
Many other nobles of less power and notability.

In short nearly the enteritis of the Scottish Nobles are in opposition to the Manx nobles. Thomase the Oppressor will soon find himself with very few friends inside Scotland.

Edit:

[insert family name here]

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His Grace James Stuart-Carver the Thirteenth, King of Scots

Operation Thunderfall

Liberation of Louisiana, Cataouba, and Eastern Arkansas

The Serbian occupation army seized southern Canada in a moment of weakness. But now it is time to reclaim our patrimony.

The eastern flank on the Upper Ohio has been fortified and allocated eight divisions against possible Serbian attack while the bulk of the army strikes south into occupied territory.

Forty divisions will be committed to the offensive, attacking from three directions. Massive air and artillery bombardment of Serbian positions will precede the crossing of the Ohio and Mississippi rivers by the First and Second Armies (28 divisions), that will then strike south on the left bank of the Mississippi aiming for Biloxi and Mobile. The Third Army (12 divisions) will attack Eastern Arkansas from the north and west and move south on the right bank of the Mississippi aiming for La Petite Roche (Little Rock), Baton Rouge, and La Nouvelle-Orleans (New Orleans)

The thick black line will be the limit of Canadian advance, being the limit of legal Canadian territory on the continent.

Operation Maple Syrup

Incorporation of Southern Ouragon

Two army divisions assisted by the Mounted Police are moving into Southern Ouragon to end warlord rule in that region, after the success of the liberation of Northern Ouragon.

Robert Can't said:

In short nearly the enteritis of the Scottish Nobles are in opposition to the Manx nobles. Thomase the Oppressor will soon find himself with very few friends inside Scotland.

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OOC: I call the GM to do a assessment of how many Scot nobles joined the rebellion and how many stayed loyal: the number RC given are too high me thinks.

Edit: wait... did you mean the nobles in Scotland or the Scottish born? I make a mistake.

And that's my final say on the matter.

Well... I guess its 50/50? I may make it 60/40 in RC's favour perhaps?

I say that all the Manx are on your side and all the Scots are on mine.

Considering this is Scotland I think that means I have sway over the majority of the population.

Robert Can't said:

I say that all the Manx are on your side and all the Scots are on mine.

Considering this is Scotland I think that means I have sway over the majority of the population.

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Wait!

Not all the Scots have to be against the Manx, just as all the Manx have to be for the Imperium...

I say that the "majority" factor forgoes the considerations: the Manx may have placed their own among much of the baronies etch, plus there is assimilation to consider.

In the end I think the 60/40 in your favour, mix of Scots and Manx on both ends, would be a more... gentleman set, yes?

Holy Srbija, as vanguard of the faith and crusader against the barbaric oppressors, declares its wholehearted support for Scots independence. So it may please God, His servant Bishop Dragomir has made correspondence with James XIII, and declareth the formation of a mutual alliance and military right of passage for the purpose of expelling the infidel Manx from the British Isles.

Ailedhoo said:

the Manx may have placed their own among much of the baronies etch,

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I totally read that as bronies.

Sweet hypocrisies.