IdIOT: Shock and Terror

>be a scientist in year 3000
>be working on ‘merican superweapon
>accidentally a weapon that causes all the nations in the world to suddenly collapse and to be replaced by weird nations inhabited by humans and non-humans
>whoops.jpeg
>spaghetti oozes out of my pockets
>then the prince of bel-air came in
>he opened the door
>got on the floor
>everybody did the dinosaur
>and then a skeleton popped out

Theme Song: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dys8KUnwGGg

Have you ever wanted to play as a nation, but you have thought “Nah, that would be too silly and stupid for this game?” Have you ever felt like being a nation from some random silly fictional show, but knew that everyone would look at you and the GM would say “ha-ha-ha-no”. Have you ever felt like acting completely bathorsehocky insane in a game, but didn’t want to ruin the srsbuiness game for other people? OF COURSE YOU HAVE! This is your chance for you to make a super silly nation, your chance to let your creative juices have their freedom, your chance to emancipate all of the silly, foolish or just plain stupid ideas you have had from your head and allow them their freedom. And everyone likes freedom, right?

Wait! Wait! Before you grab your guns and run off to your OsamaCare-Proof Freedom Bunkers™, your freedoms aren’t going to get restricted THAT much. And they’re only being restricted to stop CommuNazi Terrorists, so it’s all fine.

Joining the IOT is pretty simple. At the most basic level, I need a name, a quick description of your government and 20 claims on the map. More RP will be highly appreciated though (like history), as that is what will make this IOT funny and interesting. Note that things like tech levels, population and what exactly your nation is inhabited by are not currently tracked so it can be completely determined by you, the player. Powergaming will result in me either ignoring things or, for blatant cases, Dr Hax summoning a hurricane of computers to ruin your nation, so consider well.

i warned u

I’m just joking, the amount of stats in this game is not anywhere near as complex as even something like an early SonIOT. It’s mainly RP focused, I just have a few stats because I don’t trust myself to just wing it.

There are five stats at the beginning of the game. There might be extra stats that I might add if RP it up enough (ala Slavery from MPIV), but you don’t have to worry about that at the moment. The five stats are Money, Economy, Military, Political and Stability. Everybody starts off with 20 of Economy, Military and Political and with 80% Stability, although this could change from first turn random events/the quality of your signup.

Money ($) is the amount of money you have. You use it to buy things. Pretty simple.

The Economy Stat is the amount of money you make per turn. It is an abstract representation of the amount of money your nation makes. Think of them like factories from early SonIOTs. Each point in the Economy Stat produces $1 per turn and it costs $5 to increase it by one point.

The Military Stat is an abstract representation of your military strength. You use them to fight your wars for you. They also cost $5 to increase it by one point (see the pattern?). The military stat will be further discussed in another section.

The Political Stat is the state capacity for espionage, both against dissident groups in the country and against other countries. Political points can be used for espionage against other nations by investing points into other nations or used for espionage defence for you and your puppets. Espionage will be discussed in a separate section as well. Also, you can use the Political Stat to increase Stability by 1% per point you get. It costs $5 to increase your Political Stat by one point (surprise, surprise). The Political Stat is subject to the most random variations to discourage people from guessing who is doing what espionage action.

Stability is measured by a percentage. The lower it is the more the populace wants your head on a pike. When Stability gets low Bad Things™ start happening so keep that Stability high!

The Military Stat is an incredibly abstract representation of your military. This includes the army, navy and whatever other branches you may or may not have. Each point is equivalent to a unit in a normal IOT. As each nation is going to have variable technology rates and military organization, each point will represent something vastly different for each nation. One military point could represent a giant mech or one million peasants armed with sharped spoons, they would have an equal chance of beating each other.

War orders are simple. Just say how many points of the Military Stat you are placing to attack/defend a certain region. All points that aren't assigned by the player are put on generic defence mode. Be warned, if you get attacked in multiple fronts generic defence mode will end badly. You can send more complicated war plans if you like and you’ll probably get a bonus for them. However, as RP is basically masturbation if nobody but the GM and the player reads it, all war plans will be divulged after a few turns.

The combat system is based off of Sone’s Standard Combat System of old. The number of points participating on each side of the battle have the bonuses multiplied or added onto them. These two new numbers are then added together, they each come up with a percentage. For example, if two armies worth 100 Military Points go up against each other they each have a 50% chance of winning. If one army only has 10 Military Points and the other has 90 then the first army has a 10% of winning and the other has a 90% chance of winning. A RNG is used to then determine the winner of the battle, larger rolls on the RNG will mean more provinces are taken. The victor kills 25-50% of the enemy's numbers, whereas the loser kills 1-50% of the enemy's numbers.

As of turn seven, I replaced this system with a more complicated one. It really doesn't make a difference to the player though, just know that larger armies will win against smaller ones and that equal or near-equal size armies are anyone's game.

Espionage will work a similar way to battles, except instead of Military Points being put through the Standard Combat System it will be Political Points invested in whatever nation. Enemy spies will fight each other when they are in the same nation. Winning a “battle” of spies will result in your schemes being successful and your enemies’ spies being driven out. Losing means that your plot will fail, depending on the degree of failure they might even find out compromising information about your plot!

This is, if you haven’t guessed already, primarily a comedy IOT. And this game will be about as funny as bowel cancer if the player’s don’t spend time doing Roleplay to MAKE it funny.

Doing RP will give you hilariously unbalanced and biased bonuses. Although I will reward players for doing RP even if I don’t find it funny, if I DO find it funny the bonuses will be bigger. I find a lot of things funny, although I am prone to dadist funposting I do find subtle satire and other kinds of “gentile” humour. Just try your best everyone!

-[insert standard “don’t be a bad sport” rules here]
-You can claim five provinces per turn
-Each turn is a year in game
-I’ll try and update once a week, or possibly faster
-Genocides have a 60% chance of success per province. Genocides will also do wonders for you national stability and your international reputation.
-This game is also known as Vichy Neverending Spreadsheet: Mosher’s Glorious Anschluss
-NPCs might pop up out of successful revolts, the inevitability of player inactivity and if I feel bored and want some more nations on the map. NPCs usually are easily intimated into becoming political and economic vassals. Be warned however, some nations have leaders that make the leadership of North Korea look positively sane.
-Sucking up to the GM will almost always end well.
-Saber is love, Saber is life.
-If in doubt, pray to Ravus and the rest of the IOT Parthenon.
-The most important thing is to have fun.

IN A.D. 2013



This is the result.

• God (Goomy, genderless)
  • Lv. 200
  • Divine Nature (+++++all)
  • 62/62/62/62/62/62
  • Wonder Guard/Protean/Speed Boost
  • Goomyite/Power Herb/Pixie Plate
  • Shiny
  • Moves:
    • Geomancy
    • Judgment
    • Roar of Time
    • Psycho Boost
    • Dragon Ascent
    • Precipice Blades
• Mary (Goodra, F)
  • Lv. 100
  • Modest Nature (+Sp.Att, - Att)
  • 31/0/31/31/31/31
  • Sap Sipper
  • Assault Vest
  • Moves:
    • Draco Meteor
    • Fire Blast
    • Sludge Bomb
    • Muddy Water
• Apostle (Muk, M)
  • Lv. 98
  • Adamant Nature (+Att, - Sp. Att)
  • 31/31/31/0/31/31
  • Poison Touch
  • Black Sludge
  • Moves:
    • Curse
    • Gunk Shot
    • Ice Punch
    • Shadow Sneak
• Shepard (Reuniclus, M)
  • Lv. 95
  • Modest Nature (+Sp. Att, - Att)
  • 31/0/31/31/31/31
  • Regenerator
  • Choice Specs
  • Moves:
    • Future Sight
    • Psychic
    • Focus Blast
    • Shadow Ball
• Seraph (Gastrodon, F)
  • Lv. 98
  • Relaxed Nature (+Def, - Spe)
  • 31/31/31/31/31/0
  • Storm Drain
  • Leftovers
  • Moves:
    • Toxic
    • Recover
    • Scald
    • Earthquake
• Ophanim (Ditto, Genderless)
  • Lv. 95
  • Relaxed Nature (+Def, - Spe)
  • 31/31/31/31/31/0
  • Impostor
  • Choice Scarf
  • Moves:
    • Transform

• Illumiose-de-France
• Champagoo-Ardenne
• Gooraine
• Arceusace
• Nord-Pas de Goomy
• Upper Goomandy
• Lower Goomandy
• Brittagoo
• Pays-de-la-Goo
• Poigoo-Charentes
• Agootaine
• Midi-Goorenees
• Limousligoo
• Goontre
• Burgoondy
• Franche-Goompte
• Rhone-Arceulps
• GOOPA
• Languedoc-Goossilon
• Arceuvernge
• Belgoo
• Bade-Wurtembergoo
• la Sligoouisse
  Added c. 3000 AG (Anno Goomini)
• Basgoo Country
• Aragóo
• Gootalunya
• Vorarlbergoo
• Göodtirol
  Added c. 3001 AG (Anno Goomini)
• Astnumeria
• Valensligoo
• Thuringigoo
• Goostood Boajan
• Goustria
• Goolicia