Orc Onslaught : Semulin

Semulin

Bad Kitty
Joined
Oct 24, 2003
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Location
USA
Intro : Howdy folks!

This game is part of a friendly challenge between me and Black Adder. We'll both be playing the same game, and seeing what fate brings our way. To check out his version of the world, click the link in my sig.

For readers of my previous story : I've decided to do a bit more story, and a bit less "reporting." Let me know if you like it :)

Here's our start...
 

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In the history of the history of the War Hammer world, Gorbad Ironclaw led the orcs from their formation, to their eventual decline. What would have happened if he had been replaced? Would history have changed if another orc, from another time had emerged as their leader?
Lets find out.....


----- The Hand of Gork and Mork -----


As amazing as the sight was, it was the sound that truly defied logic.
Complete silence.

Ten of the worlds most powerful Orc Tribal leaders were gathered in a subterranean cave, each with a gaggle of goblin slaves, orc body guards, and squig pets, and not one of them made a sound. All eyes were focused on a raised platform, dimly lit by torches at the front of the cave.

A particularly large specimen of the orc race stood there. He wore a loin cloth, and a harness, full of bone daggers. Over his head he waved a bone club.

"I iz Gorbad o' de Ironclawz! I haz called yoos 'ere for yoo to know one fing!" The creature screamed.

"It iz I dat am gonna lead da orcses ta greatness!"

The assembled crowd was silent no longer. Goblins clapped their hands, orc bodyguards stomped their feet, and the chiefs hooted and hollered.

"If der anyone who doubt dis, let him challenge me now!" Gorbad exclaimed.

A figure entered from the shadows of the torch light. This orc was at least a foot taller and as much broader than Gorbad. His skin was such a dark shade of green that it was almost black. His features were obscured by a red cloak.

The figure spoke, in a soft whisper, " I iz da hand o' Gork an Mork. I iz da one dat are gonna lead us."

Silence once again fell over the assembled orcs and goblins.

Gorbad raised his bone club and charged, yelling "Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaug!" at the top of his lungs. Seconds before his club would impact, the stranger raised his had. Gorbad stood motionless, as if frozen in the Ice Wastes.

"I iz Ghazghkull Mag Uruk Thraka, da hand o' Gork an Mork, and I iz gonna lead us."

Ghaz slowly made a fist with his hand. Gorbad sprang into motion, clutching his heart, and going into convulsions on the cave floor.

"Anyone gotz a prob-lum wif dat?" Ghaz asked.

For the third time, a huge gathering of notoriously noisy creatures were silent.
 
Gorbad's body lie on the cave floor, sticky green blood running down from his ears.

"Yoo is gonna build me a Palace. Da Boss needs a place to liv and a cave not big enough for me."

Ghaz's stern gaze fell across the assemblage.

After a bit more orders and shouts of his greatness, the orc chiefs set about gathering their tribes. To build the kind of Palace Ghaz demanded, would take a lot of work. Their tribes moved to the spot Ghaz had selected, a spot near the sea and the Big Toof river.

And so the first Orc settlement was formed, more by accident than intent. The labourers didn't want to hike miles back to their caves after slaving to raise the stone walls of Ghaz's new residence, so they began to build small mud huts to sleep in overnight.

By the time the Palace was built, Ghaz found him self incharge of a thriving orc hamlet. He commanded it be called "Gorkamorka" to honor the orc gods of cunning and brutality.

Ghaz instructed his Shaman Grotsnik, also called The One Smart Orc, to begin researching a way to draw words, so that they could pass their learning on to future generations.
 
Nice! Though Ghazghkull Mag Uruk Thraka is from 40k its still good. Sos Gorkamorka come to think about it but its still great.
 
Very nice story telling. I have gone with a more reporting style so I can fit in all the stuff that happens. Good luck leading the orcs to greatness.
 
@Tyrion : Yup, Ghaz is from 40k. So is "mad doc Grotsnick" and Gorkamorka. I thought i'd have the best ork warlord of all time show up to lead us.

I'm glad a few others are taking up the torch, because my home pc died last night. Windows XP won't let any one log in. I expect to have it fixed over the weekend, and I'll get back to orcing.

Welcome to the game Tyrion and Art!
 
"Boss, we gotsta talk."
Nazdreg, Orcland's military advisor was in the palace.
"What," said Ghaz. It was more of a threat than a question.

"Dis Fuzzy," said Nazdreg, pointing down to something near his knees.

Ghaz looked down to see a snotling. In one hand he held a pointy stick, the other hand he used to scratch his backside. Ghaz kicked the snotling. The snot flew in an impressive arch and landed about 6 feet away, on his head. Fortunatly nothing vital was injured, and Fuzzy returned to scratching his itchy part.

"Me haz seen a snot befor, Nazdreg, why yoo bring dis one to me an' waste me time?" Ghaz glared at Nazdreg.

"Boss, Fuzzy is our, um, Mil-a-terry. Him all we gotz," replied Nazdreg. "An' yoo got Grotsnick (he paused and looked down as he said the name of The One Smart Orc) thinkin' on how to draw words. Why ain't he thinkin' on how to make betta bonkin sticks or somefin'?"

"Ahh," Ghaz nodded, "Caus the best weapon iz in 'ere!" he tapped his finger on Nazdreg's forhead.

"Rocks?" Asked Nazdreg.

"No, I iz talkin' a..."

Nazdreg inturupted the Boss, "Dust?"

Ghaz smacked him in the mouth, often called a "gobsmack" in orcish circles, so that he'd know to be quiet.

"I iz talkin' about yur brain. The worky bitz in yur head what makes you remember stuff. If we writs down what we lurnz, then we ain't gots to think it again latas. First we lurn how ta do dat, den we can make betta bonkin' sticks. Get dat snot outta 'ere!"

Nazdreg bowed repeatedly, grabbed Fuzzy, and ran from the palace.
 

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Excerpts from "Histury of Orcland" by "Mad Shaman" Grotsnick. Text in (parantheses) were added by imperal scribe Semulin for clarity.


Now dat we can draw wurds, I iz gonna re-cord every ting we do.


One of our snots finds some old ruins. Dere are some gobbos dere wif out no orcs to boss em, so de snot tells 'em to settle down and build some houses. Dey makes a city and we calls it Bad Moonz, named afta de tribe dat our Mil-a-terry advisor is from. (this was in the year -1750 IC)

Dat little snot named Fuzzy found a map in de southern area. He not sure what to do wif it, and when I finaly gots it, it smelled real bad.

We meets some fings dat aren't orcs. Dey is small and pink and have pointed ears. Dey call dem selves "wood elfs" but dey aint made of wood. Me finks dem are stoopid, but dey knows stuff we don't yet. Dey teach us how to make Shrines, so's we can worship Gork an' Mork properly, and we teaches dem hows to catch animals. (It appers the wood elves taught the orcs Mysticism in exchange for Domestication and a lump sum of gold. How much is unclear. This was around -1575 IC)

Dat snot Fuzzy finds some old ruins. Dere are picturs on de walls dere what show people plantin fings in de ground and stuff growin. He comes and tells us and now we knows how to farm. (Aparently the orcs discovered the arts of farming amoung some ruins, around -1525 IC)

We builds one of dem shrines in Gorkamorka, so de gods will be happy and not smash us. Gods like ta smash things me thinks. (-1400 IC)

We send some boyz (orcs refer to other friendly orcs as "boyz) outta Gorkamorka. Dey is gonna go find a spot to make anoder city. We meets some more fings dat arn't orcs. Dey is biger than de wooden elfs, and more harry. Dey cals dem selfs Westerlanders. Dem knows de secret Warrior Code. We makes dem teach it to us, and we teach dem how to build de shrines and we gets some gold from 'em too. (-1275 IC)

De boyz we sent out to finda spot for new city find one. Over to da south west of Gorkamorka, dey makes one and calls it Goff. Dat are de clan Ghaz and me is from. (-1150 IC)

We lurnz how to write stuff down, so I start writin' dis fing wich yoo is readin' (orcs descover the art of chronicles around -1100)

We made one ob dem shrines in Bad Moonz too. (-1025 IC)

Dat snot Fuzzy gets him self kilt attackin' a Skel-e-ton (-975 IC)

We finds some more ob de big people like Westerlanders. Dey is called Chaos. Dey are stoopid and can't teach us nofin' (-975 IC, we think)

We finds some goblins dat are called Redeye. Dey don't have redeyes, and don't have no orcs incharge of em. We gives dem some gold and teach 'em how to make de shrines, and dey teach us about Ba-list-sticks. Dat mean we can make bows and shoot fings. Shooty bows iz gud. (around -775, it appears the orcs payed a substantial amount of gold to the Goblins, some where around 115. They also taught the forces of Chaos the art of Mysticism for a slave worker and a small sum of gold around this time.)

We makes a road to da big harry cowz. (he means elephants.) At furst we ain't sure what ta do wif em. They tase good, but we gots the normal cowz ta eat. Dey don't make good pets, cause dey make big poops in da huts. Den we figures it out. We puts em in a pin wif some squigs. (squigs are small round monsters, with large mouths full of teeth. The orcs use them for pets, food and sometimes weapons in war.) Da big harry cowz stomps em flat and we scrapes up whats left. We calls it "Squig Jelly." It taste real nice and all da boyz like ta eats it on toast. Eberyboddy real happy bout dat. (Arround -700 IC the orcs find their first luxury.)
 

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I really liked the story telling style the quality of writing was very good. I see that you've switched to a reporting style now which is also good because you can fit more detail about the game in and I can gauge how well you are doing. When you get to around +950 please post a map of your territory - it's about that time that BA and myself posted one so it would be good to compare progress.
 
@ KA - Will do. I haven't read you folks storys yet, but I think I will soon. I've played to around 300 IC Now. Here's some more from "da book"



We starts ta make Goblin Spearmen to guard our fings.

We see da wooden elfs kill a camp o' skel-e-tons. (around -575 IC)

Goff sends out some boyz to find a place for a new city (-575 IC)

We meets da Arabyans. Dey looks like Westerlanders and Chaos. Dem know how to dig fings out of ground. So does ebry boddy but uz. We trys to makes em give it to us for nottin' but dey won't. (-475 IC)

We makes da city of Blood Axe souf west of Goff. Dis gives us a line of city's dat we hopes da elfs won't cross, and will let us settle in da souf lata. (-375 IC)

Da westerlanders sends a 'ommie (orc for human) ober to talk at us. Him wants to teach us how ta dig stuff out of ground. (mining) But him wants ta lurn how ta draw wurds. Me decide not ta teach dem yet. We gots a cunnin' plan ta make big book house fur me dat will makes us more smarter. (around -200 IC. We belive Grotsnick is speaking of the Black Library here)

We lurns how ta write storys. It's gud fur da little ones. We had been buildin a big beer factury in Gorkamorka, but I tells Ghaz to change dat to my big book house and he does. Him say we have it built soon. A big spider eats one ob our snots up north. Me angry, only orcs supposed to eat dem. (this was near -100 IC as far as we can tell)

We makes da town of Snakebite it north of Blood Axe. We lurn how ta make pots ta keep stuff in. It come in handy. (150 IC)

We trades da secrut ob makin pots to da Wooden Elfs fur dem teachin' us how ta dig stuff out a da ground and some gold. Da Arabyans teaches us ta ride stuff, which am good, but we had to teach dem how ta make pots too. We teach da others how ta make pots fur some gold. Ghaz says he needs lotsa gold fur somfin. me not sure what. (This flurry of trading was in the year 175 IC)

We makes one ob dem shrines in Blood Axe, dey start formin a group ob boyz to make another city later. (-225 IC)

We finally finish my book house in Gorkamorka. Me gonna calls it "Da Green Library." Me gota feelin' we bout ta get lots smarta. (325 IC)
 

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Glad to see you're back in business:). Great updates:thumbsup: - love the explanation why elephants make orcs happy :lol:. Seems to be going quite well too.

Spoiler :
in my game, the sylvanians built the great library in 740 - didn't go for it, but I think that will make our games even more different


My story is in the late 16hundreds right now btw...
 
Looks interesting :) Keep it up!

Although let me tell you, handling a huge mob of dimwitted greenskins isn't as easy as it looks ;)
 
Thanks for the good responce guys!

I'm going to be a bit behind compaired to the others I"m afraid. I spent no less than 2.5 hours on the phone with Microsoft trying to get this hunk o' junk running again. We finally got it, but by that time on saturday, I had no interest in anything computer related. So I lost my biggest "playing day." I may finish last, but hopefully I'll still be entertaining.

@ Adder - Will it ruin my story if I read what you and the others have? Or should I just wait till I finish to go peep?
 
I don't think it will ruin the story. You might find some things out like who's around and who's powerful and who's not, but imho, it's nothing important. It would just ruin the story if you decided to do exactly the same as anyone else did, but I don't think you would - besides even the events not influenced by the player seem to differ enough to prevent too many similarities: KA was "discovered" by Kislev for example, whilst my Kislevites still have to find our continent. In his game, Reikland was destroyed, whilst my Reikland still exists a few centuries later etc...

I didn't post a minimap yet btw, which would be the only thing that could influence it to some extent, because you could maybe see passages leading to other continents/islands and have some "unfair" advantage.
Afaik KA and Tyrion didn't find a passage yet anyway, so for me, it would be perfectly fine if you'd read the other stories. (The others are reading mine as well anyway...).
 
More from the book...


I moves inta my book house. Dere are lots to read dere. I set to readin and we lurnz about makin' good pokers (smithing), some kind o' weird stonez (Meteoric Iron) how ta make big shootaz (Siegecraft) and how ta lurn stuff from da starz (Astrology). Me head iz gettin' quite big from all dis knowledge.

Itz about dis time we has a prob-lum. See, I iz Da One Smart Orc. All of a sudden dere pops up another smart orc. He starts askin' lotsa questions and raisin a fuss. He asks why come other orcs gets old and die, or gets kilt, and Ghaz and me are always around. He starts tellin' da boyz dat we is Vamporcs, and we sucks da blood ob other orcs. We coulden't have him sayin' dat, so Ghaz had him kilt, and fur good measure had everyboddy what had listenend to him kilt too. (This was around 375 IC. The secret of Grotsnick's and Ghaz's unusually long life was never discovered.)

We makes some boyz from Blood Axe go luk for a place ta make a new city. (400 IC)

Den we has some boyz from Gorkamorka do de same (425 IC)

And den we has some boyz from Goff do dat too. Dey start buildin one ob dem shrines dere afta dat. Den some ob de big spidas kils de snot what was guardin' Goff, and dey pillage our city. Dey do de same fing in Snake Bite. Ghaz is mighty mad bout dat, and orders Nazdreg to make us a betta Mil-a-terry. (around 475 IC)

We found da city of Whump! Dere funny story bout how it get name, maby me tell you latta. (this was in 500 IC. Grotsnick never did recount the story, so I took it upon my self to do the necessary research. I have compiled an account which I belive to be close to the truth. It follows now.)
 
-----Whump-----


Ghaz lumbered slowly down the steps of his Palace. Grotsnick has sent a messenger saying that he had some new technology to unvail.

On the way through the street, a small weedy looking orc in a toga grabed Ghaz by the arm, "Excuse me Boss, may I have a word with you?"

Ghaz glared down at the orc. Normally touching the boss would get your hand choped off, but Ghaz was in a good mood and decided to be polite.
"Who da hell iz yoo!" he screamed, loud enough to quiet the street vendors selling squig jelly.

"I am Gorbald Pinksplat, your cultural advisor." The weedy orc said.

"What kul-ture?" Ghaz asked.

"Culture is the acomplishments of our Race. The things we build that stand the test of time. The shining beacon of light the emits..." The weedy orc was cut off by a spear in the head.

"No wonder I never talks at yoo," Ghaz said, and made his way down the street to the Green Library.

A small croud has gathered around Grotsnick. He had a giant contraption made of wood and rope. One long "stick" as it was labled ran over the top and had a small round cup on it.

When Ghaz arrived, Grotsnick began to shout at the assembled orcs, goblins, snots and squigs.

"Dis are a Cat-a-Pult. It gonna shoot fings at da wooden elfs when we goes ta war. See dat target ober dere?" He pointed to a large stone wall, set up several yards outside of the city proper. "We gonna smash dat good! Gobbo's load it up!"

Goblins scampered over to the catapult. One particularly ugly one sat in the cup, while another pulled a leaver labled "Only orcs kan pull dis." The goblin in the cup let out a squeel of glee as the catapult arm launched him high in the air. He flew through the sky and disapeared into the clouds.

Oooos and Ahhhhs erupted from the gathering.

"NO! dat not right! Stoopid gobbos! It shootz rocks! not gobbos!"

The goblins went into action again, this time loading the catapult with a large rock. When the lever was pulled, the target was smashed into pulp. Ghaz was pleased, and the city of Gorkamorka reveled in their technalogical supremicy.

Meanwhile, on the west coast of the orc penensula, a group of orcs that had been traveling paused to rest.

"Ghaz said dat when we were supposed ta stop walkin' and make a city, Gork an' Mork would give us a sign," said the leader of the settling party.

Just then they heard a squeel from up high. The watched as a goblin, grinning from ear to ear, fell from the sky. He landed face first on the planes with a resounding WHUMP!

The orc settling party leader hooted in excitement.

"Dat are our sign from de gods! Here we makes our new hom, and we gonna call it Whump!"

The settlers cheered and Whump was founded.
 
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