Growing Old
- Thread starter stormbind
- Start date
pboily
fingerlickinmathematickin
These boards often make me feel old... what with kids and their funky spelling...
hawai_74
mac über alles
health. you have to drink less beer, take care of your sleep...
Bozo Erectus
Master Baker
- Joined
- Jan 22, 2003
- Messages
- 22,389
1. fewer and fewer people every year know what youre talking about.
2. more hair growing in your ears than on top of your head.
3. an almost irresistable desire to shake teenagers by the shoulders and shout 'YOURE DRESSED LIKE A CLOWN FROM KIBUKI THEATER! YOU LOOK RIDICULOUS! ALSO YOUR MUSIC IS NAUSEATING AND YOU KNOW VIRTUALLY NOTHING ABOUT ANYTHING WHATSOEVER!'
2. more hair growing in your ears than on top of your head.
3. an almost irresistable desire to shake teenagers by the shoulders and shout 'YOURE DRESSED LIKE A CLOWN FROM KIBUKI THEATER! YOU LOOK RIDICULOUS! ALSO YOUR MUSIC IS NAUSEATING AND YOU KNOW VIRTUALLY NOTHING ABOUT ANYTHING WHATSOEVER!'
hawai_74
mac über alles
i think the hair in the ear is matter of genetics
wilbill
That Old Time Religion
I got a wakeup the first time the cute, 20 year-old cashier at the grocery store called me "sir". 
Bozo Erectus
Master Baker
- Joined
- Jan 22, 2003
- Messages
- 22,389
@EzynkySeriously though, long before the top of my head and my ears traded places, I knew I was officially 'getting old' the first time I saw a punk kid walking by decked out in the ridiculous clothes they wear, and I shook my head in disgust. When I was their age, I swore Id never be like all the other grownups
BTW, you have my sympathies about the bifocals, I havent reached that point yet, but then, I havent reached the big four-oh yet. I hope when Im an old man like you I dont need them
betazed
Seeking...
- Joined
- May 9, 2003
- Messages
- 5,224
- A few isolated white hair here and there on my head reminds me every morning the meaning of the phrase "Tempus fugit!"
- Can't relate to the music that is being generated these days. Still think Roger Waters "Amused to Death" is one of the greatest albums
- Kill Bill gives me a headache. Go back home to see some old favorites like "Enter the Dragon"
- Can stay alone and yet not feel lonely.
- last but not the least, vices such us smoking, drinking are decreasing not increasing.
Originally posted by Dumb pothead
Seriously though, long before the top of my head and my ears traded places, I knew I was officially 'getting old' the first time I saw a punk kid walking by decked out in the ridiculous clothes they wear, and I shook my head in disgust. When I was their age, I swore Id never be like all the other grownups
My "tail" still goes halfway down my back, though I will admit to the ears. As far as dress goes, it was the pants falling off the butts that I couldn't understand. We used to laugh at old men showing off their cracks like that.
SanPellegrino
Wanderer
that is maybe more for the step youth-adulthood, but point 5 happened to me recently in the supermarket and point 1 applies only since a few years to me (I am 33 btw)
25 signs you've "grown up"
1. Your potted plants are alive. And you can't smoke a
one of them.
2. Having sex in a twin-sized bed is absurd.
3. You keep more food than beer in the fridge.
4. 6:00 AM is when you get up, not when you go to sleep.
5. You hear your favorite song on an elevator.
6. You carry an umbrella. You watch the Weather Channel.
7. Your friends marry and divorce instead of hookup
and breakup.
8. You go from 130 days of vacation time to 7.
9. Jeans and a sweater no longer qualify as 'dressed up.'
10. You're the one calling the police because those darn kids
next door don't know how to turn down the stereo.
11. Older relatives feel comfortable telling sex jokes around you.
12. You don't know what time Taco Bell closes anymore.
13. Your car insurance goes down and your car payments
go up.
14. You feed your dog Science Diet instead of McDonald's.
15. Sleeping on the couch makes your back hurt.
16. You no longer take naps from noon to 6 p.m.
17. Dinner and a movie = The whole date instead of the
beginning of one.
18. Eating a basket of chicken wings at 3 a.m. would
severely upset, rather than settle, your stomach.
19. You go to the drugstore for Ibuprofen and antacids,
not condoms and pregnancy test kits.
20. A $4.00 bottle of wine is no longer 'pretty good stuff.'
21. You actually eat breakfast foods at breakfast time.
22. "I just can't drink the way I used to," replaces "I'm never
going to drink that much again."
23. Over 90% of the time you spend in front of a computer is
for real work.
24. You don't drink at home to save money before going
to a bar.
25. You read this entire list looking for one sign that doesn't
apply to you!
25 signs you've "grown up"
1. Your potted plants are alive. And you can't smoke a
one of them.
2. Having sex in a twin-sized bed is absurd.
3. You keep more food than beer in the fridge.
4. 6:00 AM is when you get up, not when you go to sleep.
5. You hear your favorite song on an elevator.
6. You carry an umbrella. You watch the Weather Channel.
7. Your friends marry and divorce instead of hookup
and breakup.
8. You go from 130 days of vacation time to 7.
9. Jeans and a sweater no longer qualify as 'dressed up.'
10. You're the one calling the police because those darn kids
next door don't know how to turn down the stereo.
11. Older relatives feel comfortable telling sex jokes around you.
12. You don't know what time Taco Bell closes anymore.
13. Your car insurance goes down and your car payments
go up.
14. You feed your dog Science Diet instead of McDonald's.
15. Sleeping on the couch makes your back hurt.
16. You no longer take naps from noon to 6 p.m.
17. Dinner and a movie = The whole date instead of the
beginning of one.
18. Eating a basket of chicken wings at 3 a.m. would
severely upset, rather than settle, your stomach.
19. You go to the drugstore for Ibuprofen and antacids,
not condoms and pregnancy test kits.
20. A $4.00 bottle of wine is no longer 'pretty good stuff.'
21. You actually eat breakfast foods at breakfast time.
22. "I just can't drink the way I used to," replaces "I'm never
going to drink that much again."
23. Over 90% of the time you spend in front of a computer is
for real work.
24. You don't drink at home to save money before going
to a bar.
25. You read this entire list looking for one sign that doesn't
apply to you!
SanPellegrino
Wanderer
improved version: 
1. You sigh and say "whatever", not to be smart,
but because you're too damn tired to argue about it.
2. You stop wishing your genitalia were something
they aren't, and are just glad that you don't have
to use them for a living.
3. Same with your brain. And talent. And lower
back.
4. Liver & onions aren't half bad if properly
cooked. Trouble is, most people don't know how to
cook them.
5. Doesn't anybody know how to make a dry martini?
6. This (whatever) is just too ****ing sweet.
7. You have no motivation whatsoever to eat stuff
that is painfully spicy or causes gastric upset.
8. You know the difference between various types of
fine wines, cigars, and enemas.
9. Tough it out? The hell with that. Give me
Novacaine. Lots of Novacaine.
10. Hey! You kids! Off the lawn!
11. Snow sucks.
12. Why should I do it myself when there are so many
enthusiastic workers in the world I can pay to do it?
13. You will vote for anyone who will lower the capital
gains tax.
14. You think it's funny as hell when you see young
men wearing baggy pants with boxer shorts sticking out
the top and their baseball cap on backwards, and you
think of a drill sergeant kicking the snot out of them.
15. The public execution of villains is not as repugnant
an idea as it used to be.
16. You ponder whether medical marijuana will help your
ouchy places. Who cares if you get high?
17. You get *real* mercenary when contemplating the
opposite sex.
18. You realize that you will never have as many dogs
or cats in your life that you want.
19. You are probably going to do pretty much what you
do now for the rest of your life. But less everything.
20. When someone young and cute smiles at you, your
first thought is to check your fly.
21. If it wasn't for teevee, you would go to sleep even
earlier. As it is, you still haven't seen "The Tonight
Show" in years.
22. Judging from how things have changed in your life,
your grandparents must have been born in a cave.
23. After attending a family reunion, you wonder how
many of your kin still do.
24. You can spell words like "hemorrhoid" without
thinking about them first.
25. You really appreciate the idea that a "wild" animal
is an adult, but a "domestic" animal never emotionally
matures.
1. You sigh and say "whatever", not to be smart,
but because you're too damn tired to argue about it.
2. You stop wishing your genitalia were something
they aren't, and are just glad that you don't have
to use them for a living.
3. Same with your brain. And talent. And lower
back.
4. Liver & onions aren't half bad if properly
cooked. Trouble is, most people don't know how to
cook them.
5. Doesn't anybody know how to make a dry martini?
6. This (whatever) is just too ****ing sweet.
7. You have no motivation whatsoever to eat stuff
that is painfully spicy or causes gastric upset.
8. You know the difference between various types of
fine wines, cigars, and enemas.
9. Tough it out? The hell with that. Give me
Novacaine. Lots of Novacaine.
10. Hey! You kids! Off the lawn!
11. Snow sucks.
12. Why should I do it myself when there are so many
enthusiastic workers in the world I can pay to do it?
13. You will vote for anyone who will lower the capital
gains tax.
14. You think it's funny as hell when you see young
men wearing baggy pants with boxer shorts sticking out
the top and their baseball cap on backwards, and you
think of a drill sergeant kicking the snot out of them.
15. The public execution of villains is not as repugnant
an idea as it used to be.
16. You ponder whether medical marijuana will help your
ouchy places. Who cares if you get high?
17. You get *real* mercenary when contemplating the
opposite sex.
18. You realize that you will never have as many dogs
or cats in your life that you want.
19. You are probably going to do pretty much what you
do now for the rest of your life. But less everything.
20. When someone young and cute smiles at you, your
first thought is to check your fly.
21. If it wasn't for teevee, you would go to sleep even
earlier. As it is, you still haven't seen "The Tonight
Show" in years.
22. Judging from how things have changed in your life,
your grandparents must have been born in a cave.
23. After attending a family reunion, you wonder how
many of your kin still do.
24. You can spell words like "hemorrhoid" without
thinking about them first.
25. You really appreciate the idea that a "wild" animal
is an adult, but a "domestic" animal never emotionally
matures.
The Last Conformist
Irresistibly Attractive
Hitting twenty.
Vanadorn
Motorcycling Paladin
You get grey hair in the weirdest places (my ears and my beard?!?! not my head)
When you get hurt, and CAN'T shrug off the pain and discomfort after 5 minutes.
oh and definately (from DP): "An almost irresistable desire to shake teenagers by the shoulders and shout 'YOURE DRESSED LIKE A CLOWN FROM KIBUKI THEATER! YOU LOOK RIDICULOUS! ALSO YOUR MUSIC IS NAUSEATING AND YOU KNOW VIRTUALLY NOTHING ABOUT ANYTHING WHATSOEVER!'"
My 2 cents
When you get hurt, and CAN'T shrug off the pain and discomfort after 5 minutes.
oh and definately (from DP): "An almost irresistable desire to shake teenagers by the shoulders and shout 'YOURE DRESSED LIKE A CLOWN FROM KIBUKI THEATER! YOU LOOK RIDICULOUS! ALSO YOUR MUSIC IS NAUSEATING AND YOU KNOW VIRTUALLY NOTHING ABOUT ANYTHING WHATSOEVER!'"
My 2 cents
The Last Conformist
Irresistibly Attractive
First time I felt old? A little girl addressed me as farbror "uncle" - a usuage typical of kids speaking to or of adult males outside their immediate family. I was, I think, 15.
ShiplordAtvar
Texan by the grace of God
First time I felt old was the day when I realized that I too would someday die.
Rather depressing.
