TerraNES: The Civil Experiment

Danae-southern Mesopotamia. Controls all the ports into Levea from that end. In a single BAMF, the growing Levantine trade route sneaking towards India is cut.
Parusha is the blob between and east of Iggy and Stockholme. They control the most minerals, which the League, Hyakkid and Aramyan armies basically run on for quite some time. Hyak is the least dependent on their minerals, Aramya the most. The League has possible but more expensive stuff elsewhere, but then... (looks at Valyria) those sources won't be ready for export easily...

Ah, the stuff you learn in ancient history class.

This is just to say, Viria agrees to not middleman trade between League and the other Aramyan powers. Imports from the League will be sold locally.

EDIT: And so the War of Prince Jerome's Balls begins.

Castrate the messenger, send him back in chains, let them know the fate that will befall any prisoner captured inside our borders.

SKILORD said:

Castrate the messenger, send him back in chains, let them know the fate that will befall any prisoner captured inside our borders.

Click to expand...

With the cutting of the balls of Grand Vizier Hiram's son, Jahon, Viria is reconsidering their relationship with the League.

I don't take kindly to people declaring war on my nation. I hope that the (whoever rules those countries) gets the picture and realizes that their decision was both hasty and foolish, they don't know who they're threatening, and sending his own son? We already castrated the first messenger who declared war on us!

Well, I'm sure that Jahon will make a fine eunuch, no loss. In a land of miracles where the descendants of Gods rule over less men I am sure that he can be healed.

-Public Statement from the Administration.

OOC: See backstories of Aramya... yeah, they send their sons to help out, including managing diplomacy.

To the League
From Viria

We merely declared our neutrality in this matter and you castrate the messenger? If it wasn't for your previous reasonableness, we would have declared war on you right now, and through our leadership of Kitabalism to ask your priests to throw you out as well. Be careful who you insult and who you befriend, oh Administrator.

(Note, Viziers like you because they are city states Papal States style, not kingdoms. Also, for all, please PM or VM questions if you are confused about ANYTHING, at ALL)

Whoa, I never intended to castrate anyone from Viria.

I'm not that crazy, I only castrate specific people.

Terrance888 said:

To the League
From Parusha and Danae

I guess you didn't take our warning seriously, eh? All trade will be diverted southward to Axum, no Paruhorsehockye or Danaean merchant is allowed to enter the lands of the League on the pain of death. No League merchant may enter Parusha or Danae on the pain of death. War is declared.

Now that that is done, we can take a break and talk about where to send our troops. The Medes are the most important threat right now. Oh, the League? They can't even reach us, so what do we care? We destroyed their livlihood, and that is that. Confiscate all League merchants currently in our lands and their property and hold them ransom. Its good that so few of our merchants work in the League...

Click to expand...

This guy got castrated.

-

This is just to say, Viria agrees to not middleman trade between League and the other Aramyan powers. Imports from the League will be sold locally.

Click to expand...

This guy was accepted as a brother, not castrated.

I fell behind on the thread, that castration post was clearly poorly placed. Should have edited it for clarity.

OOC: I would like Quoting as well during responses. Besides, you can't castrate a guy twice. That's Ball-less Jerome, he's back.

OOC: Well then nevermind.

To the Hyaks
From Prince Ball-less Jerome of Parusha

We want to have our revenge on the League personally. I am willing to murder my father, the king, and take the throne, and declare Parusha for you if you will help us invade the League. Don't worry, I already have an heir in place, but I want revenge for what they stole from me.

Shall you let me call you my High-King?


From Parusha

What? Don't mess around with Ball-less Jerome. He's crazy since he got his balls chopped off and want us to do more against the League. Just... just help us get him in his straightjacket.

To Parusha

Don't worry, at least he won't afflict you with any raving lunatic children.

To the League

No one of the Line of Nir-Aram is crazy! I have half a mind to abdicate the throne to Ball-Less Jerome and die in peace, as in with a spear in my hands.

To Pommerania/Hamburg;
You have some mail gents, please read.

To: King Edguar, Master of the Heavenly Kingdom of Etass
From: Sarrukan-sar, High-King of Hyak, Avatar of Takarzi

Your requests are beginning to tire me, Edguar. You may accept what I have offered you, or you may reject it. I believe I have made my offers sufficiently clear. Nothing stops you from influencing the northern trade routes, just as traders from Ortun and Bablae have spread across Hyak and beyond. However, over these routes you will not wield sole authority.

You may accept my offer as it is, with all that it contains. You will rule your own lands as I have designated. You may commence these construction projectss on your own, should you so desire. Everything else I have promised will be upheld as written. Your enthusiasm to fight and willingness to recognize Takarzi's rightful position are noted with approval, but you would do well to not push my limits in the midst of these negotiations. If my terms are unacceptable to you, then you are at liberty to fight me. I desire to create a new ally from a strong and respected rival, not a to subsidize an uncooperative kingdom within my own borders.

Terrance888 said:

BY THE WAY GUYS!!!!!

6 Months left, more or left, in the seige of Etass. Attack, counter attack, blah blah. Most important news here is that half the Hurrians got to the other side while the other half drowned via Rammage by curraghs. This is to say that the Garrison is now only outnumbered 3-2, with food running out faster but a chance of doing something.

MEANWHILE

Viria and Parusha start preparing armies, supposedly to fight the Medean menace.

Hurrian battlelines stabilize, Etassite Hurrians use archers to harass supply barges of Hyak.

Mini-updates are back as an option. Will Levea wish to take this advantage?

Click to expand...

How did the Etass-aligned Hurrians get across the river in such great numbers without any naval force prepared, out of curiosity?

To: Parusha, Danae and the Levantine League
From: Hyak

Halt this nonsense at once.

To my allies in Parusha: I would be most pleased to see your great warriors marching under my aegis, but this spat is foolish and distasteful to me. Calm yourself, for proper battles lie elsewhere, and we shall taste much of this combat in the near future.

To my neighbours in the Levant: For a nation that styles itself as a keeper of peace, you have done an astoundingly poor job in recent months. While you behave as a man of business, you speak with the bearing of a prideful soldier- which of these two things do you desire to be? You cannot be both. Your provocation of the Aramyans was entirely unnecessary, and inflames a conflict that, while it promised to be a good fight, provided a distraction the likes of which I have exceedingly limited interest.

Were it not for the oath of my father Naran, I would have half a mind to allow Parusha and Danae to march across into your lands- perhaps even with myself at their lead. However, this rash response is not in keeping with my doctrine, and I have little interest in seeing your lands engulfed in a war of my own design.

To all, war approaches us on all sides. If you seek more amongst your own Levean ranks, then your devotion to Takarzi is noted, but your long term ability to sustain the war god will be called into question.

The Administrator is willing to apologize and to castrate his own messengers if the other nations require proof of his sincerity.

Lord_Iggy said:

To: King Edguar, Master of the Heavenly Kingdom of Etass
From: Sarrukan-sar, High-King of Hyak, Avatar of Takarzi

Your requests are beginning to tire me, Edguar. You may accept what I have offered you, or you may reject it. I believe I have made my offers sufficiently clear. Nothing stops you from influencing the northern trade routes, just as traders from Ortun and Bablae have spread across Hyak and beyond. However, over these routes you will not wield sole authority.

You may accept my offer as it is, with all that it contains. You will rule your own lands as I have designated. You may commence these construction projectss on your own, should you so desire. Everything else I have promised will be upheld as written. Your enthusiasm to fight and willingness to recognize Takarzi's rightful position are noted with approval, but you would do well to not push my limits in the midst of these negotiations. If my terms are unacceptable to you, then you are at liberty to fight me. I desire to create a new ally from a strong and respected rival, not a to subsidize an uncooperative kingdom within my own borders.

Click to expand...

OOC: You've been very vague by Etassian standards. Could you draw up a basic treaty? We need points which are specific; more than "wield sole authority", so for example in the trade routes if you want some authority you should say that you want to have the right to station soldiers, or send settlers or what have you.

From Exalted King Edguar
To Sarrukan-sar

Negotiations are tiring. The first to sleep loses. We expect a great conqueror to understand the lengthiness of treaty processes. If Sarrukan-sar is willing speak once more before Edguar admits his kingdom into your empire, be it a response to this question.

What are your terms precisely? You haven't been as clear as the legal minded people of Etass would comprehend. Please engrave them in a clay tablet that future kings may adhere to these conditions.

Castration seems unnecessary and wasteful, unless you're really into that sort of thing and the other nations really want to see it.

OOC: I'll write up a treaty summarizing everything- I don't have any new points to add, and I feel any further points are starting to cut down below the minimum resolution of details in this NES.

TO: Ctesiphod
FROM: Katan

We will accept your surrender of your remaining holdings in Koislyu (Greece) to bring an end to this great war. If you do not surrender we will slaughter your men and children, rape your women and destroy all traces of your civilization from history. If you do surrender, now, we promise safe passage from your cities and across the seas. What say you?

TO: Toras-Noth
FROM: Katan

We extend the same terms to you as we have to Ctesiphod. Leave Koislyu in the hands of the High Kingdom of Katan and in the capable hands of the Master of Men, Fire Lord, the High King of War.

OOC: For the treaty; well, just roleplay that detail.

For the Hurrian Soldiers; they did what Neo-Egypt didn't, namely, swarm over with a large amount of hastily built rafts while archers provided covering fire. They brought food and more importantly, more manpower into the city.

IC:
From Jerome the Ball-less
I want the Balls of the Administrator himself. FRY IT infront of him... Then I will MAKE HIM EAT IT.

From Parusha
Ignore Jerome. He is as crazy has his new high-pitched voice. We're willing to allow peace to return if the League pays 1EP ransom for his merchants and an official apology, carved in stone, towards the institution of Monarchy.

From Danae
We want 1EP in ransom for his merchants and the lowering of his tariffs to a suitable rate, as well as the monument desired by Parusha. The Bloodline of Nir-Aram is nothing to be joked with, I shall see to that.

TO: People of Koislyu (Greece)
FROM: High King of War, Fire Lord, Master of Men of the Katanic Empire

Your lands join the empire and gain rights therein. Present to me a suitable prince and he may rule over the High Princedom of Koislyu in my name as a born son of the land.