What's the fastest/ funniest/ most unexpected Civ3 loss you ever suffered?

Yeah... So last night I rolled another one of my (nearly) All-Random games (Small map, DG level, Restless Barbs, Normal AI-aggression). I got curb-stomped by the Iros on Turn 20, making this my Shortest. Civ3. Game. Ever.
So I'm looking for sympathy here (or at least, funny stories): Not including Regicide / Elimination-games, what's the fastest you've ever lost a solo-game (any difficulty, any map-size)?

When I lose it tends to be very fast indeed, normally from a horse invasion while I'm pushing for a low military, high science empire to rush to a certain point. However, my most memorable defeat was the first game I played coming off of Civ 2 and experiencing 3 for the first time. I fostered a tight, science rich empire of a handful of cities and thought my 3x Veteran Fortified inside Metropolises and Civil Defenced Infantry would hold off anything the AI could muster. Alas, an invasion of Cavalry went through them like butter and I had my first lesson that I was playing a different game

COTM 105 (Rome, Deity) was my fastest loss, (though it certainly wasn't funny... )

Not my fastest, but my most unexpected defeat.

I was playing as Spain on an island map on regent level. I discovered, that I had a huge, but harsh frozen island group all for myself.

Without contact to any other civ, I reached 40% of world population and 8 out of 9 iron resources.

Suicide galleys no longer work in my game, since they can no longer pass ocean squares.

With the discovery of Astronomy I finally was able to find another nation. To my surprise and horror, it were the Mongols, who had about 55% of the world population and such amazing developments as Steam Power, Nationality, Industrialisation and others...

Temujin had allready pushed all other civs out of the game. The largest surivivor was Carthago with a three or four city island.

Only a few rounds later the Mongols declare war, sunk my scouting Galeass (Astronomy) with an Armored Cruiser (Iron Construction, formerly Ironclads) and started an invasion with Cavalry, Early Tanks, Riflemen and an Keshik-Cavalry-Army, supported by a big fleet including Dreadnoughts (Steel).

A few rounds later I gave up as the mongol hords cuts through my defending Knights and Musketmen like a knife through butter.

I have never seen such a runaway KI befor (and that was only regent level).

Strange that it was you, who dicovered the advanced nation: normally it is the backward nation that gets discovered by the advanced nation... (Like the Native Americans who "got discovered" by Spain.)

I can only guess, that Temujin was busy killing everyone else on the map.

I found my (more accurate ) report here:
http://forums.civfanatics.com/showthread.php?p=13782688

EDIT: Current game nearly went into this, thanks to sloopy editing: While creating an enbassy in Tenochtitlan, I discovered to my surprise that Montezuma actually has an Aircraft Carrier under construction - in the ancient age.

Short inspection in the editor revealed that I forgot to add the requirements for the latest added units (Ranger Aircraft Carrier and Iowa Late Battleship).

Luckily the Iowa belongs only to the Iroquois, who are not in the game. Otherwise it would become very unpleasant...

My fastest loss was with France at Emperor level (back when I was winning one in about five games at Regent level), in a COTM; I don't recall the map configuration. I fell half an age behind technologically, but started to catch up despite getting my butt handed to me in past wars. Just when I was thinking I had a smidgen of hope I got dogpiled and lost around the late medieval age.

I once did something I have never been able to repeat and cannot reconstruct in my mind even how it was possible. I somehow how built either a settler or a worker beyond the capacity of my nascent capital, the game was ended immediately and I got 28,000 points. So it must have been one of those Easter egg things I stumbled upon. I'm not sure it counts as as an early defeat though. Of those, I have accumulated too many even to recall, let alone particularise, and there was nothing funny about any of them.

I have an early memory, though, from a distant time when I was an absolute beginner. I was struggling to cope with barbarians. Every now, one of my carefully tended towns would be ransacked and pillaged by a horde of horsemen. Anyhow, in one game I fortified a warrior at the far end of a distant mountain chain. Every so often a horde of barbs would hurl itself at him and he would fight them all off, reaching elite status very quickly of course. The rest of the empire expanded without incident. I was immensely pleased with this triumph!

I also have memories, too many to recall individually, of playing what I thought was quite a nice game only to find (usually when their vast horde appeared on my border) some monstrous superpower had emerged on a distant part of the map and that the end was very much nigh.

I've mostly played continent and archipelago maps that were kinda over after I got railroads/tanks.

I think I'll play some Pangea maps and go blitzkrieg, scorched earth, balls out, all out against the AI and see what happens.
Step 1: pillage
Step 2: build nukes
Step 3: ??
Step 4: win

I have been invaded by barbs while trying to build my first warrior. that was a quick game. I think it was a tiny map and another civ opened a hut near my city.

Kirejara said:

Not my fastest, but my most unexpected defeat.

I was playing as Spain on an island map on regent level. I discovered, that I had a huge, but harsh frozen island group all for myself.

Without contact to any other civ, I reached 40% of world population and 8 out of 9 iron resources.

Suicide galleys no longer work in my game, since they can no longer pass ocean squares.

With the discovery of Astronomy I finally was able to find another nation. To my surprise and horror, it were the Mongols, who had about 55% of the world population and such amazing developments as Steam Power, Nationality, Industrialisation and others...

Temujin had allready pushed all other civs out of the game. The largest surivivor was Carthago with a three or four city island.

Only a few rounds later the Mongols declare war, sunk my scouting Galeass (Astronomy) with an Armored Cruiser (Iron Construction, formerly Ironclads) and started an invasion with Cavalry, Early Tanks, Riflemen and an Keshik-Cavalry-Army, supported by a big fleet including Dreadnoughts (Steel).

A few rounds later I gave up as the mongol hords cuts through my defending Knights and Musketmen like a knife through butter.

I have never seen such a runaway KI befor (and that was only regent level).

Click to expand...

Sounds awesome
I put that "impassable ocean" in my mod too and to be honest, it's one of the best things I've done. (that and disabling map trading)

I try hard to think about a game where I went out discovering, only to meet a civ far more advanced well into the game. Because normally my best game is at the early middle ages mark.