What do I have to do to get a city?

Long story short, Bismarck took offense to my forward settled city and DoW'd me. I was prepared with comp bows and swordsmen, and he lost probably 30 units to my 4, barely scratching my city. I've plundered trade routes, pillaged every resource I can, and killed probably another 5 units after his initial 30 or so from the failed siege. He will not give up his closest city to me. It's got a major monger penalty for capture, so I don't want to go do that now (only medieval era, I don't want everyone hating me before we all get fancy schmancy units and all) so I'm stuck. I want his city pretty badly, as it was where I initially wanted to settle the city he was trying to capture, and he's been beaten to a pulp. Every turn he offers peace, open borders, his horses and his only remaining lux that wasn't pillaged, but won't relinquish the city even when I offer him a lux he doesn't have, and iron. Do I need to siege the city? Siege his cap? Or is it not going to happen and I need to make peace or take it by force?

make DOF with the other leaders and then take his city that you want (idk if it is his capital or satellite), but the DOF wears off around the same time that the penalty for taking the city wears off. then take the city using comp bows depending on the era, maybe rush machinery for the crossbows would be better though, and then take the city. Also, what civ are you playing as and what turn is it?

I'm Inca, it's probably around turn 130 or so? As far as I know, none of us know civs from the other continent, and I have DoF with 2 of the 4 other civs on my continent. I was unaware that warmonger fades though, that's good to know. Roughly how long does it last?

AI doesn't care about military loses. It cares about ratio of his army to yours (as given by the same flawed calculation the military adviser uses) and economic loses (losing cities) You'll have to take the city if you want it at which point there is chance he'll be willing to surrender another city for peace.

bringing the city down to zero life (even better bringing his capital down to zero life) can sometimes make the AI see sense.

So there is benefit to seiging the city, yes.

Pengui6668 said:

but won't relinquish the city even when I offer him a lux he doesn't have, and iron.

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I am pretty sure that putting things into the peace offer does not work. I think your only hope of getting a city in a peace deal is to be in a position to conquer his cap. That said, I don't think I have ever been offered cities without first taking at least one.

Also, you mentioned that you are kind of isolated. AIs that have not met Bismarck will not care what you do, so long as you are at peace when they met him.