Funny diplomacy

Oh, I do love this game! It's been long enough for me to have forgotten how massively addictive and life-consuming it is, so I'm dipping in once more . I'm on Emperor as the English and doing quite well. I'd also forgotten how weird some parts of the game are. Case in point:

Zulus: Will you sign a ceasefire?
Me: I will!
Z: Done. But don't expect us to honour it. To us it means nothing.
M: ...
Z: Now how about signing a peace treaty?
M: ???

Persians: We demand you give us some tech.
Me: No. But how about a trade?
P: We have no interest in the primitive tech of your pathetic civilisation!
M: ....Well.... YOU brought it up... Now I'm thinking about your tech AND my feelings are hurt... This has been a disaster...

Me: Well, it's a straight choice really. I can give you Elvis, no problem at all there. But we have very little food. 100,000 of you will starve to death. Alternatively, if you can just work the field for ONE more year...
The People: BOLLOCKS WE WANT ELVIS

Zulus: Will you sign a pact against the Mongols?
Me: No, the Mongols are my friends.
Mongols: Will you sign a pact against the Zulus?
Me: No, the Zulus are my friends.
Spies: Mongols and Zulus have signed a pact to contain your aggression!
Me: For the last time, I'M FRIENDLY!!! Moderator Action: Removed text
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(Also, it's only just occurred to me the humour of it costing your city the equivalent of 100,000 people in food to host Elvis. No wonder he died.)

Can someone delete my account? I can't seem to be able