The lamest jokes you can think of....... II

Status
Not open for further replies.
How do you catch a unique rabbit?
Unique up on it.

How do you catch a tame rabbit?
Tame way, unique up on it.

What's invisible and smells like carrots?
Bunny farts.
 
Did you hear they're tearing down the pub and replacing it with a cell phone store? They're razing the bar.

A Microsoft executive said computers should only have one font. It was a bold type of thing to say.

Times are tough for the farming industry. All the eggs are getting laid off.

"I just sheared my sheep."
"Isn't she cold in the freezing weather?"
"Not wooly."

The police are accusing a man for killing a hobbit. He said he just happened to be at the scene of the crime, but a policeman said "One does not simply walk into murder."

I'm writing a novel set in Helsinki, but I don't have time to Finnish.

My friend has been to both the arctic and antarctic. Sometimes he's proud of it, but other times he thinks he's wasted money doing it. He's bipolar.

A man keeps on calling me asking if I wanted to buy a case of Kit Kats. I told him to give me a break.

Where does the gingerbread man go to drink? The candy bar.
 
I hate those Russian Dolls. They're so full of themselves.

As I get older I find the desire to sing "The lion sleeps tonight" is just a whim away.
 
How do you call an alligator in a vest?

Spoiler :
An investigator
 
That is terrible! :lol:
 
Hey, I'm not saying the postal service is slow, but the last batch of seeds I ordered arrived as a bouquet.
 
Did you hear about the famous opera singer who de-loused her prized pet rodent?

Spoiler :
She de-fleaed her mouse.
 
guy #1: Who wants my snickers bar?

guy #2: a few million kids in Africa!

It was pretty funny at the time.
 
I'm glad you approve!

My boos wanted me to buy him a sandwich from Subway, but I refused. He wouldn't no for an answer though and I was forced into submission.
 
Those are awful. At least the alligator joke was good.

Did I tell the Russian Doll joke? I hate them, they're so full of themselves.
 
Those are awful. At least the alligator joke was good.

Did I tell the Russian Doll joke? I hate them, they're so full of themselves.

Perhaps you are becoming senile. :p
 
The whim away joke is also good, give me credit.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Top Bottom