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Clues you've been playing too much FFH

Discussion in 'Civ4 - Fall from Heaven' started by Scott Alexander, Nov 2, 2007.

  1. Scott Alexander

    Scott Alexander Chieftain

    Joined:
    Jan 7, 2005
    Messages:
    58
    (based on the 1000 Clues You've Been Playing Too Much Civ)


    1. You wake up in the middle of the night and go outside to check if Hell has spread to your backyard.

    2. Every time there's a cold spell, you panic and run off in search of your magic sword.

    3. You've built a Shrine of Sirona in your living room, which you use every time you skin your knee.

    4. The last time a spider got into your house, you stuck it in a pen and waited for the payoff.

    5. You oppose the war in Iraq on the grounds that it might raise the Armaggedon Count.

    6. You've received dreams from the Octopus Overlords.

    7. You call your minister/priest/rabbi "the local Luonnatar", and both respect his monotheism and find it laughably impractical.

    8. You refer to your neighbor's kids as "a new tribe slinking across creation, still in that twilight between birth and the recruitment of hell."

    9. You never lie, cheat, or swindle, on the grounds that "those features won't be implemented till Shadow."

    10. You've connected the clues in the Civilopedia and determined that Eurabates the Gold Dragon is Cardith Lorda. And although you don't have any proof, you also suspect Abashi the Black Dragon is Dick Cheney.


    I dare you to try and do another nine hundred ninety.
     
  2. ZhugeTien

    ZhugeTien Enlightened Despot

    Joined:
    Oct 10, 2007
    Messages:
    96
    Location:
    Ohio
    Quite an enjoyable read. I regret to say I cannot top it for the moment, but I'll certainly be thinking on how. Kudos.
     
  3. Psychic_Llamas

    Psychic_Llamas Wizard in the Making

    Joined:
    Nov 25, 2005
    Messages:
    6,366
    Location:
    Western Australia
    11. you have an irrisistable temptation to build a mana node over anything blue and shiney.
     
  4. loocas

    loocas Prince

    Joined:
    Jun 26, 2007
    Messages:
    439
    Location:
    Seattle
    12. You finish every transaction with, "Aye, and you're a shrewd negotiator."
     
  5. Nimbus

    Nimbus Prince

    Joined:
    Mar 9, 2006
    Messages:
    368
    13. You pay heed to the warning and eat your snacks in moderation.
     
  6. seZereth

    seZereth FfH´s art monk(ey)

    Joined:
    Feb 3, 2006
    Messages:
    3,900
    Location:
    Bayreuth
    :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
    this is awesome
     
  7. merciary

    merciary No idea what I'm doing

    Joined:
    Mar 8, 2006
    Messages:
    1,541
    Location:
    OSU
    14. Every time the news says we're running out of resources you wonder why the country doesn't build more Earth Nodes.
     
  8. zxcvbnm

    zxcvbnm The Nobody

    Joined:
    May 20, 2007
    Messages:
    2,070
    Location:
    nowhere
    15. Your wife/girlfriend asks why your home is untidy. Your answer: "my palace produces chaos and entropy mana"
    16. She is annoyed because you "use entropy magic"
    17. You donate $$$$$$$ to Unicef hoping it'll lower the armageddon counter
    18. You ask why people are allowed to mix science and religion despite of it being AV and very evil
     
  9. Nikis-Knight

    Nikis-Knight Deity

    Joined:
    Dec 22, 2005
    Messages:
    5,636
    Location:
    Orange County, CA
    More icons on your desktop refer to Fall from Heaven than to anything else... combined. ;)
     
  10. wilboman

    wilboman Hibernorse Frost Giant

    Joined:
    Nov 25, 2001
    Messages:
    2,403
    Location:
    A timeshare in Kwythellar
    19. You suspect that the recent spate of forest fires really are indications that Acheron is holed up in a small town in California.
     
  11. wilboman

    wilboman Hibernorse Frost Giant

    Joined:
    Nov 25, 2001
    Messages:
    2,403
    Location:
    A timeshare in Kwythellar
    20. Clowns are even scarier now than the used to be. And they used to be pretty damn creepy.
     
  12. TheJopa

    TheJopa Šumar

    Joined:
    Dec 29, 2005
    Messages:
    2,008
    Location:
    Croatia
    21. You think some people you know resemble to FfH leaders.
     
  13. zxcvbnm

    zxcvbnm The Nobody

    Joined:
    May 20, 2007
    Messages:
    2,070
    Location:
    nowhere
    22. You build obelisks in your neigbours' gardens hoping that they will lose some of their income.
    23. To prevent your backyard from becoming smaller you glue lizard posters on your walls, name your 10-year old child as the leader and build a statue in your backyard
    24. You run away from any puppeteers you see
     
  14. Black Whole

    Black Whole Dancing Condor

    Joined:
    Dec 21, 2005
    Messages:
    534
    Location:
    Theatre of Dreams
    25. You put down a mirror in the garden and await that it produces sun mana.
     
  15. Black Whole

    Black Whole Dancing Condor

    Joined:
    Dec 21, 2005
    Messages:
    534
    Location:
    Theatre of Dreams
    26. Every time you pass a cemetery, you flee because there could be a selpucher, which spawns Barbatos.
     
  16. zxcvbnm

    zxcvbnm The Nobody

    Joined:
    May 20, 2007
    Messages:
    2,070
    Location:
    nowhere
    27. You count the armageddon counter, based on the number of civilisations in the world and cities razed during the history
    28. You wonder how it can be only [Censored for your own good] as it's turn 12076
    29. You wonder why we don't have immortals to send to wars as it's turn 12076 and we surely must have researched divine essence
     
  17. Jenaelha

    Jenaelha fields of Elanor

    Joined:
    Jul 7, 2007
    Messages:
    251
    Location:
    Antelope Valley
    30. You see your undeveloped front yard and think a cottage would do nicely there.
     
  18. DeaExMachina

    DeaExMachina Warlord

    Joined:
    Sep 30, 2007
    Messages:
    168
    31. You sit down at your computer and go to open the internet, opening FfH by mistake.
    32. You go to open MSN wile opening FfH by mistake...AGAIN!
     
  19. loocas

    loocas Prince

    Joined:
    Jun 26, 2007
    Messages:
    439
    Location:
    Seattle
    33. You assign leader traits to everyone you meet. My boss is Spiritual and Aggressive, one manager is Charismatic and Philosophical, while I'm Organized and Expansive.
     
  20. KillerClowns

    KillerClowns Emperor

    Joined:
    Oct 6, 2007
    Messages:
    1,139
    34. (True story) You switch back to basic BtS, and when you get dropped in the middle of a desert, you instinctively start looking for mana to build a water node on.
    35. (Also happened once) Your exclamation of surprise is "What in Agares' unholy name?!?"
     

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