Middle Ages
90 BC - We completed The Great Lighthouse. We tried to build the Statue of Zeus, but the Mayans beat us to it. At some point we build Knights Templar.
190 AD - We discover the Dutch. This is like if the US sent two boats from California, one north around Eurasia and the other one south around Africa, and discovered Puerto Rico only after sailing around the world. Plan to execute my admirals to hide my own incompetence and so I don't have to pay them the bonus for meeting Theodora. Then more embarrassing discoveries. The Dutch homeland is not their homeland after all, just an island practically next door that rightfully should be ours. I name it Newfoundland, and while planning an invasion, we discover an even closer, unoccupied island that we name Cuba.
We hastily plan to settle Cuba, but when we arrive, there's a Byzantine settler/spearman pair. My men murder them and attempt to hide their bodies in the sea, but are caught. Theodora refuses to accept my explanations that their deaths were accidental, and declares war on us.
350 AD - Phony war with the Byzantines draws to a close. Cuba has long since been occupied. Attack the Dutch.
470 AD - Liberation of Newfoundland is complete, and we sign a peace treaty with the Dutch. I discover that William has allowed Theodora to build a summer palace/winery on his continent, probably so he can peep through her windows. I try to warn her of the threat, but she's too Cautious of me to listen.
510 AD - Discover a bunch of islands in the middle of nowhere. Surely our crafty Lord and creator of this world, Templar_X placed valuable resources on them. The ships sent to settle these islands must cross through Mayan waters. Even though we only have to cut through ONE square, Smoke is a giant baby about it and complains constantly.
530 AD - Dutch, Byzantine, and Mayan ships constantly infringe on our territorial waters, but I dare not challenge them lest they declare war to get out of paying their debts.
580 AD - The Mayans land a warrior next to the island town of Alalah, located just west of our continent. I do not notice him, and the next turn they declare war on us and he suicides on the swordsman defender. Welp, don't have to feel bad about crossing their sea squares any more. I enlist Julius as an ally, since he has a city in the midst of Mayan territory, on the peninsula to our south.
610 AD - Destroy the peninsular city of Lagartero. Want to replace it, not on the old city site, but in the marsh on the very tip so we can get the whale. Block off the peninsula so the Romans don't get any ideas.
630 AD - Try to take Palenque but fail. Survivors cluster on a mountain peak and wait for reinforcements
650 AD - Destroy Palenque. The Romans have been of no use, having even lost the city of Antium to their rivals. However, I reassure Julius that I appreciate his moral support.
660 AD - Troops advance towards Chichen Itza. I use the bottleneck on the peninsula as a waystation for wounded troops to heal, and send captured Mayan workers to clear the marshlands.
710 AD - Prepare the final assault on Chichen Itza. Attacking force is 3 crusaders, 2 knights, swordsman and a cannon. Strongest defender showing is a javelin thrower, but for some reason a pikeman and trebuchet are prancing around outside the city.
730 AD - Goodbye Mayan capital. Nothing left of value that we could hold, so we begin to evacuate the continent.
750 AD - Working on Magellan's Voyage and Copernicus' Observatory. Found the city New Tarsus near where Lagartero once stood. The Mayan continent has become a mess, as the Byzantines, Dutch and Incans swoop in like jackals. The Incans are the first to settle the barren land to obtain Ivory. I do not care - Theodora is once again Polite with me, and offers to "Show Me Hers" if I "Show Her Mine", though unfortunately she is talking about Maps.
770 AD - Have finished settling the three islands in the middle of nowhere, and discover a fourth! Ooh, it has bonus grassland, and probably rubber or uranium! Send settler. Congratulate my ally Julius on finally being able to retake Antium.
790 AD - Orderly evacuation complete, we sign a peace treaty with the Mayans.
810 AD - The crusader guarding the bottleneck near New Tarsus gets bored and starts building a fortress. Byzantines build a city down there too.
840 AD - After 240 years of war the Romans finally go on the offensive and conquer Tikal, which I alternately like to pronounce "Tickle" or properly, but in a Method Man voice.
850 AD - The Romans build Hispalis in the Mayan wasteland. The wretched Mayans are down to 3 cities. Go Julius! Romans surpass the Mayans by one point in score, 315-314. We're in first with 765. Incans in second with 611. Power graph shows we are as strong as the next four civilizations put together.
900 AD - Plotting an invasion of the Netherlands. We have 5 turns left on our peace deal, which I don't care about, but I do like getting their silks for free as long as possible. Mayans are down to two cities.
920 AD - 17 turns til Smith's is built in Lisbon
940 AD - Five caravels, loaded with cannons and crusaders, wait near Utrecht. A second shipment will bring the faster-moving knights and cavalry.
960 AD - Take Utrecht. Commando units (crusader, pikeman, longbowman) blow up the Dutch iron mines in the north to prevent them from building their stupid Swiss Mercenaries. The Romans and Mayans finally make peace. Didn't bother enlisting any allies vs the Dutch - we're just too amazing to need any.
1000 AD - Conquer Amsterdam, learn Magnetism, and enter the Industrial Age