Everyone gather 'round for...A-hole neighbor stories!
- Thread starter thestonesfan
- Start date
Bamspeedy
CheeseBob
I haven't had any really strange neighbors. Well, one of my current neighbors is a little weird, but she's more lonely than anything. I very rarely talk to her, yet she gives me champagne on Christmas and New Years, and occassionally gives me steak and homemade banana bread and tells me that I'm such a good neighbor. Her generosity is baffling to me. The only thing I've ever tried to help her with is getting her lawn mower started (which I failed at getting it started), yet she gives me this stuff. Her favorite saying is "My husband is in heaven, while I'm in hell."
For 2 years, I used to live in in the upstairs of a house, while a Hmong family (husband, wife, 1 or 2 kids), lived in the downstairs (seperate entrances to our apartments), but I never heard a peep out of them. The most quiet and hidden neighbors I've ever had. Both of the parents had jobs, yet I never saw or heard them leave the house. I think I only saw one member of that family, and it was their kid, and I only saw him once. I didn't really have any idea who lived down there until I was talking to my landlord when I was moving out.
My parents, however, currently have a neighbor that is quite the oddball. I know he had been in some sort of institution (mental or criminal, I don't know) or something earlier in his life, but I don't know for what reasons (my parents might know). It seems like my parents always have new stories about him. He lives in a trailer (this is out in the country), and he bought another trailer just to store more of his 'stuff'.
One story (more about him being 'unlucky' than odd), was when he destroyed his car. He was in his car warming it up to go somewhere. He had the door open and he dropped a cassette tape and it fell out of the car. He bent over to pick up the tape and then fell out of the car himself and so the car rolled forward by itself. The car went down his driveway, across the highway, down a ditch, BETWEEN a utility pole and the electric cable that goes down into the ground, and then smashed HEAD ON into a tree that was far apart from any other trees. The very next vehicle he bought had the gear (or drive?) shaft collapse and drop to the ground the first time he tried starting it up in his driveway.
For 2 years, I used to live in in the upstairs of a house, while a Hmong family (husband, wife, 1 or 2 kids), lived in the downstairs (seperate entrances to our apartments), but I never heard a peep out of them. The most quiet and hidden neighbors I've ever had. Both of the parents had jobs, yet I never saw or heard them leave the house. I think I only saw one member of that family, and it was their kid, and I only saw him once. I didn't really have any idea who lived down there until I was talking to my landlord when I was moving out.
My parents, however, currently have a neighbor that is quite the oddball. I know he had been in some sort of institution (mental or criminal, I don't know) or something earlier in his life, but I don't know for what reasons (my parents might know). It seems like my parents always have new stories about him. He lives in a trailer (this is out in the country), and he bought another trailer just to store more of his 'stuff'.
One story (more about him being 'unlucky' than odd), was when he destroyed his car. He was in his car warming it up to go somewhere. He had the door open and he dropped a cassette tape and it fell out of the car. He bent over to pick up the tape and then fell out of the car himself and so the car rolled forward by itself. The car went down his driveway, across the highway, down a ditch, BETWEEN a utility pole and the electric cable that goes down into the ground, and then smashed HEAD ON into a tree that was far apart from any other trees. The very next vehicle he bought had the gear (or drive?) shaft collapse and drop to the ground the first time he tried starting it up in his driveway.
Dann
Green bug
Reaction A: That sucks, allright.
Reaction B: What's your problem, man? FREE BOOZE!!! Join the party!
My current neighbors are ok. Not as friendly as the ones I'm used to back home but at least silent. It's me who's the neighborhood pest because of my occasional loud music.
What gets to me is not the neighbors, but the fact that there's construction projects to the north, south, east and west of our little housing cluster.
THAT is Shenzhen's curse. The noise!!! Make it stop!!! 
thestonesfan
A Client of Ron Kuby
Originally posted by Dann
Reaction A: That sucks, allright.
Reaction B: What's your problem, man? FREE BOOZE!!! Join the party!
Seriously, how many of you guys would just go join the party? I thought males had an aversion to social contact outside their group of friends.
Besides, I think they party in Spanish. So they'd talk about me and I would have no idea what they would be saying.
And I'd inevitably say the word "soccer", so I'm sure they'd beat me up for that.
Iggy
Deity
Understandable
Zwelgje
Deity
- Joined
- Nov 20, 2001
- Messages
- 3,953
My downstairs neighbour is a Chinese woman who flushes everything through her toilet, including the oil she cooks in. I don't have to tell you it gets messy. Just today the plumber had to come over to get my sewer to work again. I don't know how the situation is in her house at the moment (she only speaks chinese) but I do know that she can only use the toilet cause all other sewer openings (in the kitchen and bathroom) are clogged...
She used to live with her husband but they got in a fight over his gambling-addiction and he tried to kill her with a stick. He failed and locked himself into the storage box below the appartment complex and torched himself. The fire-department put out the flames and rescued him but he died a few months later.
Never a dull moment...
She used to live with her husband but they got in a fight over his gambling-addiction and he tried to kill her with a stick. He failed and locked himself into the storage box below the appartment complex and torched himself. The fire-department put out the flames and rescued him but he died a few months later.
Never a dull moment...
Chief Lunatic
Chieftain
My neighbour has a thing about trying to kill pigeons.
Its more of an obession really.
He says they carry all sorts of dieases.
He trys to encourage other species of birds by putting out bird feeders etc and throws stones and bits of pottery at any pigeons that he sees in the grass area round the back of our block.
He also used to go balistic (lose his temper somewhat) if you ran the hot water after a certain time because it woke him up? He's stopped doing this thank god but it made life difficult for a time.
Otherwise he's a good neighbour.
Its more of an obession really.
He says they carry all sorts of dieases.
He trys to encourage other species of birds by putting out bird feeders etc and throws stones and bits of pottery at any pigeons that he sees in the grass area round the back of our block.
He also used to go balistic (lose his temper somewhat) if you ran the hot water after a certain time because it woke him up? He's stopped doing this thank god but it made life difficult for a time.
Otherwise he's a good neighbour.
Dann
Green bug
Not when I'm already pissed out of my mind.
Who cares? You're there just for the free food and drinks. All you need to be able to say is "Hola", "Gracias" and "Uno mas, por fabor".
Mrogreturns
The Ghost Who Posts
I once lived next to a house that was a sheltor for battered women. One night I was up watching a movie when I heard something hit the air conditioner ouside. This was followed by things hitting the walls and roof. I went outside just in time to see a white car speeding away. The next morning I found numerous vinyl records strewn around the house and garden. I think that an angry husband wanted to off-load his wife's record collection but got the wrong house.
I just moved a couple of weeks ago, into one of those apartment complexes that's made up of a lot of smallish 2-floor buildings. The complex allows cats, but only indoor-type cats. They're allowed in your apartment, and on your deck if you have one, but not allowed to roam around loose outside.
I have a deck, and since I'm on the upper floor, was thinking it'd be a great opportunity to let the cat get some fresh air. Since she's declawed and no jumper to begin with, and since the nearest neighbor's deck (which happens to be in the next building) is at least 10 feet away, I figured I had no worries about her getting loose.
She did, though, right across a teeny little ledge onto the neighbor's deck railing and down maybe 3 feet onto the neighbor's deck. Then she sat there and cried and cried, because she couldn't get back.
The neighbor happened to be home. This was fortunate, I thought, because with the cat on a deck attached to the next building (to which I have no key, and to which the door buzzers probably didn't work based on the non-functioning of those in my own building), who knew how I was going to get access to retrieve the cat? So when I saw the blinds in front of the deck door moving, I thought, great, this won't take long.
Only, when I finally got her attention, I find out that my neighbor
a) won't let me come up to her apartment to get the cat
b) won't get the cat herself and bring her down to me (her exact words on the latter option were "I'm not going to touch that THING!")
Then she shut the door and closed the blinds. The cat just meowed at me.
I spent about an hour trying various schemes to get the cat back -- from trying to lure her into jumping back up to the railing, to climbing up on the railing of the deck below her, grabbing her leg and trying to pull her through (all I got out of that was her collar), to calling my boyfriend and another friend to try to recruit them to help (both were out), to calling up Home Depot to figure out how much it cost to rent a ladder (too expensive, not to mention I'd need a trailer for it and I have no trailer hitch). I also went around the front of my neighbor's building to ring buzzers to see if anyone else would let me in (maybe I'd be more persuasive at the woman's actual front door?), with no responses.
Finally I wound up calling the police. They, very kindly, sent an officer over, who did manage to get into the building next door. The woman told him to bugger off as well! Finally, between him, me and another patrol officer, we repeated the maneuver with the lower deck and grabbing the cat's leg and managed to drag her through the rails, only a tad stressed out from her 3-hour ordeal.
The next day, I found out the woman had called the complex supervisor to rat me out for letting out my cat. I got a phone call from said supervisor, referring to the House Rules and reminding me that letting my cat run about loose could get me thrown out. Happily, I was able to clear that up.
Silver lining: it's probably best to know my enemy from the get-go ...
Renata
I have a deck, and since I'm on the upper floor, was thinking it'd be a great opportunity to let the cat get some fresh air. Since she's declawed and no jumper to begin with, and since the nearest neighbor's deck (which happens to be in the next building) is at least 10 feet away, I figured I had no worries about her getting loose.
She did, though, right across a teeny little ledge onto the neighbor's deck railing and down maybe 3 feet onto the neighbor's deck. Then she sat there and cried and cried, because she couldn't get back.
The neighbor happened to be home. This was fortunate, I thought, because with the cat on a deck attached to the next building (to which I have no key, and to which the door buzzers probably didn't work based on the non-functioning of those in my own building), who knew how I was going to get access to retrieve the cat? So when I saw the blinds in front of the deck door moving, I thought, great, this won't take long.
Only, when I finally got her attention, I find out that my neighbor
a) won't let me come up to her apartment to get the cat
b) won't get the cat herself and bring her down to me (her exact words on the latter option were "I'm not going to touch that THING!")
Then she shut the door and closed the blinds. The cat just meowed at me.
I spent about an hour trying various schemes to get the cat back -- from trying to lure her into jumping back up to the railing, to climbing up on the railing of the deck below her, grabbing her leg and trying to pull her through (all I got out of that was her collar), to calling my boyfriend and another friend to try to recruit them to help (both were out), to calling up Home Depot to figure out how much it cost to rent a ladder (too expensive, not to mention I'd need a trailer for it and I have no trailer hitch). I also went around the front of my neighbor's building to ring buzzers to see if anyone else would let me in (maybe I'd be more persuasive at the woman's actual front door?), with no responses.
Finally I wound up calling the police. They, very kindly, sent an officer over, who did manage to get into the building next door. The woman told him to bugger off as well! Finally, between him, me and another patrol officer, we repeated the maneuver with the lower deck and grabbing the cat's leg and managed to drag her through the rails, only a tad stressed out from her 3-hour ordeal.
The next day, I found out the woman had called the complex supervisor to rat me out for letting out my cat. I got a phone call from said supervisor, referring to the House Rules and reminding me that letting my cat run about loose could get me thrown out. Happily, I was able to clear that up.
Silver lining: it's probably best to know my enemy from the get-go ...
Renata
My best dorm life story thus far comes from last semester when I was in "The Party Dorm." About 2:30 AM my roommate and I were sitting in our rooms surfing the net and watching TV when we hear this loud BANG BANG BANG out in the hall. Naturally we look out to see what's up and there's these 2 drunk frat guys banging on the door (Later we found out they were upper classmen coming to do something to these 2 freshman of their frat) about 5 doors down.
Well the 2 guys inside wouldn't answer, and why should they at 2:30 in the morning when they had class the next morning. Well, the drunks just wouldn't take no as an answer and continued beating on the door. They were making such a ruckus that the RA on the other side of the building came over and told them to quiet down on 2 occasions.
Then finally about 3 AM my roommate goes to take a shower to get ready for bed. Well the 2 drunks are still out there and just as my roommate steps out our door he sees them literally kick down the door. It was at this time that the RA from the other side came over for the last warning before a write up and he starts up "Guys I told you twice to hush up (Then looking up at the kicking in), OHHHHHHH SH*T!"
Turns out after we inspected the next day, the lock had been knocked out of it's peg and the door frame was ripped to shreads. Quite a bit of damage. Took about 2-4 weeks for the university to replace the door as well, which would have made me mad.
Well the 2 guys inside wouldn't answer, and why should they at 2:30 in the morning when they had class the next morning. Well, the drunks just wouldn't take no as an answer and continued beating on the door. They were making such a ruckus that the RA on the other side of the building came over and told them to quiet down on 2 occasions.
Then finally about 3 AM my roommate goes to take a shower to get ready for bed. Well the 2 drunks are still out there and just as my roommate steps out our door he sees them literally kick down the door. It was at this time that the RA from the other side came over for the last warning before a write up and he starts up "Guys I told you twice to hush up (Then looking up at the kicking in), OHHHHHHH SH*T!"
Turns out after we inspected the next day, the lock had been knocked out of it's peg and the door frame was ripped to shreads. Quite a bit of damage. Took about 2-4 weeks for the university to replace the door as well, which would have made me mad.
samildanach
Necrophile
I went to visit some friends who were living in California, at the time, in an apartment complex and the week before I got there this happened.....
A worried looking guy comes to their door and asks them if they've seen their next door neighbour around. They tell him they haven't seen their neighbour for a week or two. He tells them that he is a friend of his and that he had loaned him his car for the week but he isn't around and this is the second or third time he has been over to collect the car.
The guy is a bit anxious for his friend (or more probably his car) and asks them if he can use their phone so he can call the cops. Anyway the cops come round and they decide to force the door. Inside the apartment it looks like someone has left in a hurry. When they get to the bedroom they find a heavily bloodstained bed with handcuffs attached to the bed frame, and the walls and ceiling spattered with blood. The police later reckoned that their neighbour had driven the car out of state, possibly, with something unpleasant in the boot.
After my friends told me this story I asked them if I could borrow their car.......they said no!
A worried looking guy comes to their door and asks them if they've seen their next door neighbour around. They tell him they haven't seen their neighbour for a week or two. He tells them that he is a friend of his and that he had loaned him his car for the week but he isn't around and this is the second or third time he has been over to collect the car.
The guy is a bit anxious for his friend (or more probably his car) and asks them if he can use their phone so he can call the cops. Anyway the cops come round and they decide to force the door. Inside the apartment it looks like someone has left in a hurry. When they get to the bedroom they find a heavily bloodstained bed with handcuffs attached to the bed frame, and the walls and ceiling spattered with blood. The police later reckoned that their neighbour had driven the car out of state, possibly, with something unpleasant in the boot.
After my friends told me this story I asked them if I could borrow their car.......they said no!
hawai_74
mac über alles
About 8 years ago, in my previous apartment i could hear all what's around, the walls were so thin. My nearest neighbour was a man, about 40 years old. I saw him once, but i could hear him all day and night long. This guys suffered from something very bad. he coughed to death and vomited quite 10 times a days (i heard everything 
) So one days i saw him down the stairs, he looked awful, he sweated like oil stuff and his eyes were yellow... a couple of days later i went out and i saw 2 men (re)painting the flat. They told me that the guys died...
One week after a nice girl took up the apartment (i never told her the story) but one day she told me that the toilets looked very awful. The painters jut gave a brush on the toilet rim, and the beautiful white paint begins to crumble showing a yellow-mouldy-color. yes i never told her that was the effect of the previous owner's bile...
) So one days i saw him down the stairs, he looked awful, he sweated like oil stuff and his eyes were yellow... a couple of days later i went out and i saw 2 men (re)painting the flat. They told me that the guys died...One week after a nice girl took up the apartment (i never told her the story) but one day she told me that the toilets looked very awful. The painters jut gave a brush on the toilet rim, and the beautiful white paint begins to crumble showing a yellow-mouldy-color. yes i never told her that was the effect of the previous owner's bile...
thestonesfan
A Client of Ron Kuby
Lots of great stories!
The dorms are always an experience. I remember one time I heard a terrific crash in the hall way, and opened the door to find a shattered 40 oz. beer all over the floor, with no one in sight. What a waste. Then there was the really high-strung dude who rode a bike around the halls and listened to really loud heavy-metal at 6:15 in the morning. He didn't do that long, however.
I really shouldn't complain. The fiestas are really annoying, but that is the only bad thing about living where I am. By far the worst people to live by are college guys. I lived in a duplex a little while ago, and we were surrounded with college jackasses. The guys sharing the building with us were complete pricks who could not leave the house without slamming the door loud enough to shake the building. But, like all blustery college guys, they were afraid of assertive women, and my wife had them scared.
The guy living diagonally to us who worked on his motorcycle at 1 AM really needed shot, though. I don't know if he really worked on it, or if he just sat on it and made vroom-ey noises all night in his garage.
The dorms are always an experience. I remember one time I heard a terrific crash in the hall way, and opened the door to find a shattered 40 oz. beer all over the floor, with no one in sight. What a waste. Then there was the really high-strung dude who rode a bike around the halls and listened to really loud heavy-metal at 6:15 in the morning. He didn't do that long, however.
I really shouldn't complain. The fiestas are really annoying, but that is the only bad thing about living where I am. By far the worst people to live by are college guys. I lived in a duplex a little while ago, and we were surrounded with college jackasses. The guys sharing the building with us were complete pricks who could not leave the house without slamming the door loud enough to shake the building. But, like all blustery college guys, they were afraid of assertive women, and my wife had them scared.
The guy living diagonally to us who worked on his motorcycle at 1 AM really needed shot, though. I don't know if he really worked on it, or if he just sat on it and made vroom-ey noises all night in his garage.
