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From the 'Bumper Book of Dad Jokes'

Discussion in 'Humor & Jokes' started by Parmenion, Nov 15, 2005.

  1. Parmenion

    Parmenion Chieftain

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    This joke works best when you tell it in a Northern (England) accent :


    A man takes his kids to the zoo.

    When they get there they discover that there are absolutely no animals in the entire zoo...

    Except for one....

    In a small cage at the far end of the zoo was a dog.





    .....Wait for it.....




    It was a Shih Tzu.....
     
  2. Trogg

    Trogg Spiritual Entity

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    I am overwhelmed with blankness of mind
     
  3. Parmenion

    Parmenion Chieftain

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    Okay, a Shih Tzu is a breed of dog. You pronounce it "Sh!tzoo"

    nevermind......
     
  4. Parmenion

    Parmenion Chieftain

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    Here's another 'Dad-joke' :

    Q - Why do elephants paint their toenails red?

    A - So they can hide in cherry trees.
     
  5. Parmenion

    Parmenion Chieftain

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    And another ;

    There were these two fish in a tank.....

    One says to the other.....

    "So how do you drive this thing then?"
     
  6. Rambuchan

    Rambuchan The Funky President

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    Two cows standing by a fence. One says "Moooo". The other says "Gosh that's strange, I was just about to say that."
     
  7. Rambuchan

    Rambuchan The Funky President

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    Two cows, standing in a field.

    One says to the other:

    "Say, you know this mad cow disease?"

    "Yup." Says the other.

    "Well, doesn't it worry you at all?"

    "Not really."

    "Well why not?" asks the first.

    "Well why should it? I'm a camel after all."

    ---------------------------------

    When you say 'Dad Jokes' you mean nonsense jokes right?
     
  8. Trogg

    Trogg Spiritual Entity

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    Yes i know that...
    Still not very goof...
    I might suggest checking out the riddle thread, the even more word association or one of the many other infamous threads
     
  9. Parmenion

    Parmenion Chieftain

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    Yeah, the sort of rubbish jokes that dads tell their kids. I used to poiltely laugh at my dad's awful jokes and pray that I wasn't going to develop his sense of humour when I grew up.
    I have friends that have recently become parents and suddenly got a really bad sense of humour. I think the midwife hands new fathers the 'big bumper book of dad jokes' as they are leaving the hospital so that they can entertain their kids - badly.

    Anyway :

    Irish man walks into a blacksmiths and asks them for a job. The blacksmith says have you any experience shoeing horses, and the Irish man says No, but I once told a donkey to f*ck off!!
     
  10. Rambuchan

    Rambuchan The Funky President

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    That's actually pretty good that one. Quite absurd but I like it!! :D
     

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