Marsden Goes to the Opera

[Marsden]

Hey what does that say in the corner?
It says 4000BC.
4000BC? What does BC mean? Your my future science advisor, what's the answer?
Well it means Before Christ.
How do we know it's "before Christ" if he isnt here yet?
Well some people say BCE the slip the E on there and change it to "Before Common Era"
Again, how do we know the common era is comming in 4000 years if it hasn't happened yet? What is this the Uncommon era. And another thing, if whe haven't discoverd an alphabet, writing, or mathematics, how are we even having this discussion?
That's it I quit. Let's stay here.


I don't know what to call myself.
What do you mean. Just use your name.
I don't want to, I think I should go by something else.
Like what, goober.
That's It! I will be Goober, the Head of Babylon! Or Head Goober to you. Well all I want is to have a nice cultural community and let the rest of the world enjoy me.
This is going to be a long 6000 years.


Wow, 450 years to build that! Thanks Elvis.

Your majesty... I mean Head Goober, we have trained a warrior, just one.

Great now I have an army.

A thousand years and this is all I have to show for it.



Thucydides! What the hell kind of name is that! When I find him he'll be Ouchydides!

Hey there's other people in this world.


The other peoples leader. I'm happy I'm the best looking leader here.



Oh, okay.

Hey, now that the ugly guys taught us how to make clay pots(?) lets save some food for later.


Lo, and it came to pass that Graceland was founded. So it shall be written so it shall be done.


Hey, wait a minute! It can't be written, we're 45 turns from discovering writing!

 

[Marsden]

Hey, Head Goober, I found another one of those "scout" things walking around. And look at who it belongs to.


Well, this is a small improvement.

See how happy my people are, Graceland is in flames from rioting! Who's paying these historians anyway.

Hey! Those Zulus are trying to make a grab for the ivory! I refuse to let them have it. Send my one man army!




Great, we beat the enemy warrior and the settler walking with him split into two workers, talk about good axe work.


And here's the home land.


Yaaa! Now I own the ivory. I want to build a giant statue of myself for all the world can marvel at me. It might even cause some guys to show up on horseback and work for us!


Well, I'm not sure what to make of this. It could be a good thing, but I have a feeling it would have been much better later on.


Alright, you suffered enough, lets stop fighting (for now)


Man, now I know I need to have that statue of me built. The people need something good to look at.


Geez, 3000 years in the bucket and this is all we have to show for it?

 

[Eltrai]

I love the city names Marsden.

What level are you playing at? Any restrictions? Size of map and # of opponenets?

 

[Vind2]

Very nice story What is the rulesset? And how as Shaka Gracious to you?

 

[carmen510]

Lol! Shaka was Cautious when makin peace treaty! I'll be followin.

 

[conquer_dude]

What's so great about that?

Thanks to your domestic advisor I have to go murder somone.

 

[Marsden]

Thanks, Eltrai, Vind2, and the rest.

Sorry I haven't gotten back to anyone, I've been busy with other stuff.

I don't know why Shaka was gracious, maybe he's just an @$$!()!#.

It's a small regent pangea 60% water with 3 opponents. Originally meant to be an entry into the HoF's GIII Gamma, I gave up on that an decided to do a nice little culture game. I pick 3 expansionist opponents because they get no culture buildings and I was sure to bump into one of those scouts early to give me pottery for the granery.

Don't worry, there might be time between updates, but I will finish it.

And if you don't care if I finish it then you are not reading this now so don't worry your little head over it.

 

[azzaman333]

There is more creativity in that 1 screenshot than most of my games put together. Die Shaka!

 

[carmen510]

Are you going to continue this Marsden?

 

[Marsden]

Hey, I noticed we know a better way to govern, but I am still just a Despot. Why is this?
Well, your Headness, we can change to that "republic" but we would need to have a revolution.
Don't start with the Beatle jokes!
I know, how about "the people are revloting!"
You can say that again, the whole situation is revolting.
What a revolting developement.
That's it with the revolting jokes! AGGhh!


Yea! were going to be Republicans, where's Lincoln?


Oh, now this is NICE! This looks so good I think a bunch of guys will show up with their horses and agree to work for us!


Your Headness, we are expanding our lands and power.


This guy just showed up at the statue, saying he just lost his old gig because one of the other guy's girlfriend ruined everything.
Well, put him to work.


Hi, uh, sir. A man with a broom on his head to see you sir.
Thank you.


Map making? Why would I want to buy that? I never need to stop and ask for directions, and I never get lost.

Here's another guy, he said he got replaced by Joe Lynn Turner, they wanted songs about girls instead of wizards and magic and now he wants to get in touch with his inner warrior and needs a new job.


Another few of many new cities.



This republic is working out pretty good. Paying the workers instead of beating them is less demanding and they work faster, too.


Whoa, its a whole new age! Cool.


Does anyone think it's strange that this huge tomb acts as a granery in all of the cities? What does everyone do, mail their excess food to the pyramid?

 

[Marsden]

Hey, ya know we have a bunch of those horsemen now, lets set them loose.
Oooh, sounds good. Biff whose on the menu?
Well, we have broomhead to the northwest, mongoloids to the northeast and the kingdom of the tractor woman to the southwest.
I think....I'll...piiiiiiick.....broomhead!



The Zulu are not very dangerous, are they?


Oh, now that was Really nice of them to finish that nice temple for us last turn.



Well, here is a nice screenie of the greater kingdom.
Hey! Wait a minute, when did Christ come, it isn't BC any more. I didn't even get to see it and it's ten years ago already. *$&*#*(#&)(#%^**@


More fun for Groucho.


Hey Hey your Headness! We built you a big useless wall! Man we made a killing skimming the union dues on this one!
Shhh! Not so loud.


Great news! Jango felt a tingle at that last battle and a full grown man that has the potential to be a great general popped out of his...er.. well out.


Raiders, kill Shaka dead. Raaaiiid! BOOM


Great, the Lamda Lamda Lamda house is finished! Let's Party!


In honor of our reshent.. hic! I mean recent celebration, let's have another war!

 

[Marsden]

Hey I have to use the bathroom, number 2. And it's probably going to be a big one, I haven't gone in the last 4000 years.
Well sir you're in luck we just opened the Great Public Library, the restroom is on the first floor on the left.


Why the long face, Mr Ed?
Well, shucks. The discovery of theology made the oracle close up shop and move to Sheboygan.
What are you talking about! We don't have an Oracle!

By the way, if that guy is so smart, tell him to figure out a way to make me a fancy church instantly.

Not bad.


Wow, a book. This cost 200 units of industrial ablility?.


Good, another smart guy, another instant church. This one doesn't have the pictures, but the sound system is much better.



Boy, there are a lot of nuts running around armed. And this is supposed to be a station of peace in neutral territory. Our last best hope for peace.


I didn't even realise it was Christmas! Send Cathy a thank you note.


After 5000 years our little republic is still going.


Alright, now I can finally go to see the play. I wanted to go to the opera, but the Sydney Opera house didn't make the final cut at firaxis.


More for me! How nice.


Set up some velvet ropes and will charge everyone to look through the telescope toward the Pi Mu Sorority house.


Wow, now the ages are flying past.


Can you tell me please, how did an Englishman writing a thesis on economies decide to turn into Yosemite Sam and open a general store in Dry Gulch?


Well, if you think that's weird, why is the first ship that circumnavigated the globe being used as part of a playground?

 

[Marsden]

Wow, we built a bank so big the money has room to grow in there!



I can explain this one. The first statue is how I feel when I first get to the party, then after a few beers I'm feeling a little better, then later at night I'm fully erect.


Ta da! I win, what a shock.


I think this speaks for it self, don't you?





No more stats, you're putting me to sleep.

And now we leave the land of Goober. Flying away in our helicopter we take one final look back and wonder why we bothered.



Go away! It's over! So Carmen don't you go asking for an update, got it!

 

[azzaman333]

Go away! It's over! So Carmen don't you go asking for an update, got it!

Fair enough.

 

[Red Door]

Wow. An impressive win there.

 

[Lord_Iggy]

Nice one Marsden.