My collection of Civmas poems/songs

[remake20]

Hello,
I did a "Twas the night before civmas" last year and I've come back with more. The two of the new was about you being owned... . Hope yo guys enjoy this, some of the rhymes are off, but WTH. If this dies I'll Start it again closer to Christmas.

This thread is also in the off-topic forum (and that's where last years was).

Twas the Night Before Civmas:
This is the one from last year. That a few of you said you liked it and no one said that they didn't.

Spoiler :

This may be in the wrong forum, if it is them please move it.

'Twas the night before Civmas, when all through the house

Not a creature was stirring, not even a Bear;

The nukes were hung by the Palace with care,

In hopes that Sid Meier soon would be there;

The Civ players were nestled all snug in their beds,

While visions of Domination danced in their heads;

And William in his Mall, and I in my cap,

Had just settled down for a long winter's play,

When out on the town square there arose such a clatter,

I sprang from the bed to see what was the matter.

Away to the window I flew like a Jet Fighter,

Tore open the shutters and threw up the sash.

The moon on the breast of the new-made Fallout

Gave the luster of Nuclear Winter to objects below,

When, what to my wondering eyes should appear,

But a miniature sleigh, and eight tiny Leader Heads,

With a little driver, so cool and fun,

I knew in a moment it must be Sid Meier.

More rapid than eagles his coursers they came,

And he whistled, and shouted, and called them by name;

"Now, Washington! now, Khan! now, Roosevelt and Tokugawa!

On, Ashoka! on Churchill! on, Saladin and Montezuma!

To the top of the grocer! to the top of the wall!

Now dash away! dash away! dash away all!"

As dry leaves that before the wild Random Event fly,

When they meet with an obstacle, mount to the sky,

So up to the house-top the coursers they flew,

With the sleigh full of Computer Games, and Sid Meier too.

And then, in a twinkling, I heard on the roof

The prancing and pawing of each little Chin.

As I drew in my hand, and was turning around,

Down the Palace Sid Meier came with a bound.

He was dressed all in fur, from his head to his foot,

And his clothes were all tarnished with ashes and soot;

A bundle of HOF Updates he had flung on his back,

And he looked like a peddler just opening his pack.

His eyes -- how they twinkled! his dimples how not there!

His cheeks were like Ivory, his nose like a Spices!

His droll little mouth was drawn up like a bow,

And the culture of his chin was as legendary as the snow;

The stump of a pipe he held tight in his teeth,

And the smoke it encircled his head like the Apostolic Palace;

He had a broad face and a little round belly,

That shook, when he laughed like a bowlful of jelly.

He was chubby and plump, a right jolly old Leader Head,

And I laughed when I saw him, in spite of myself;

A wink of his eye and a twist of his head,

Soon gave me to know I had nothing to dread;

He spoke not a word, but went straight to his work,

And filled all the nukes; then turned with a jerk,

And laying his finger aside of his nose,

And giving a nod, up the Palace he rose;

He sprang to his sleigh, to his team gave a whistle,

And away they all flew like the down of a thistle.

But I heard him exclaim, ere he drove out of sight,

"Happy Civmas to all, and to all a good-night."

Frosty the Bowman:
New one about the player getting owned.

Spoiler :

Frosty the bowman is a killer threat to all,
With a antique bow and a super dagr'
He killed all your units...
Frosty the bowman is a super god, they say,
He was made of steel but the Mongols
Know how he came to life one day.
There must have been some magic in that
Old silk bow he had.
For when he drew it up...
He killed everything on screen.
O, Frosty the bowman
Was alive as he could be,
And the Mongols say he could kill
away just the same as Dreadnoughts in Next War.
Boometty, boom, boom,
Boomety boom, boom,
Run from Frosty now.
Boomety boom, boom,
Boomety boom, boom,
Over the hills of blood.

Santa Claus is Owning Your Face:
Another one about the player getting owned.

Spoiler :

You better watch out
You better not cry
Better not pout
I'm telling you why
Santa Claus is owning your face
He's making a tank
And promoting it twice;
Gonna find out where you cities are at
Santa Claus is owning your face
He sees you when you're in a GA
He knows when you are weak
He knows if you've got obsolete units
So be upgrade them for your civ’s sake!
O! You better watch out!
You better not cry
Better not pout
I'm telling you why
Santa Claus is owning your face
Santa Claus is owning your face

We Wish You a Merry Civmas:
Merry Civmas everybody... This is also the shortest.

Spoiler :

We wish you a Merry Civmas;
We wish you a Merry Civmas;
We wish you a Merry Civmas and a Happy Conquest victory.
Good tidings we bring to you and your civ;
Good tidings for Civmas and a Happy Conquest victory.

We wish you a Merry Civmas;
We wish you a Merry Civmas;
We wish you a Merry Civmas and a Happy New Year.

I know some of these aren't the full length, but WTH. Hope you enjoy.

And Merry Civmas from remake20...

 

[Bushface]

Guard the walls with bows and arrows
Falalala, fa-la-la la!
Block the land just where it narrows
Falalala, fa-la-la la!
See the enemy, through our le-en-ses
Falalala, fa-la-la la!
We're secure in our defenses
Falalala, fa-la-la la!

 

[bobbyboy29]

For all the other Hanukkah celebrators out there:

To the tune of "dreidl, dreidl, dreidl, I made it out of clay"

I had a little Axeman,
I made him out of copper,
REX queen Cathy's right next door,
And I need someone to stop her.

Oh Axeman, Axeman, Axeman,
I made him out of copper,
And when I've chopped and whipped enough,
The sexy russian I shall clobber!

(note, axes can also be made from iron but surprisingly i found that harder to rhyme with than copper)

 

[LegionSteve]

All very good, but I particularly like 'Santa Claus is Owning Your Face'

 

[McThomas]

make some with cottages and scientist xD