Yes. But you cannot change someone else's bigotry and that boy is responsible to make the decision whether to put up with it or leave. Claiming kidnapping is ridiculous, unless they used unlawful means to force him.
Parents of 'ex-gay' student threaten lawsuits
- Thread starter Talkie_Toaster
- Start date
Yes. But you cannot change someone else's bigotry and that boy is responsible to make the decision whether to put up with it or leave. Claiming kidnapping is ridiculous, unless they used unlawful means to force him.
Mise
isle of lucy
I don't understand the focus on the boy, when it's the parents who are in the wrong here? Or do you agree with the parents' actions?
Enkidu Warrior
Ultramagnetic
Having your family threaten to disown you is never a small matter, especially when you're a medical student and still dependent on them. They were threatening to ruin his life. This guys parents are scum as far as I'm concerned. I hope the poor guy emerges from his brainwashing sane enough to ditch his backwards family as soon as he's out of their financial grip.
As far as the law goes, I guess it's impossible to intervene legally as far as the parents bigotry is concerned. I do think that these ridiculous psychological torture camps should be shut down though.
As far as the law goes, I guess it's impossible to intervene legally as far as the parents bigotry is concerned. I do think that these ridiculous psychological torture camps should be shut down though.
That kid should join the forces and grow up a bit. Living at home at 23?
If they threatened him that way, they are morally in the wrong. But legally they're not. There is nothing to gain by blaiming someone bigotry, in the end you are responsible for your life.
It's societies fault, if they actually can ruin his life that way.
Enkidu Warrior
Ultramagnetic
He's a medical student. It really isn't unusual at all. Plus the US military would have disowned him even faster than his family once they found out he was gay.
Mise
isle of lucy
There's nothing to be gained by criticising racism, sexism, ageism or homophobia? There's nothing to be gained by opposing slavery or the oppression of minorities? Victims of discrimination should put up and shut up, and simply learn to live with the consequences of other people's hatred? We as a society should blame the victim of bigotry and discrimination, for being dependent on bigoted and immoral people?
Well, that sort of fastidious attention to legal rights over what's morally right seems to prevail on this forum, so it shouldn't surprise me. But it never fails to, every time.
Education takes a long time if you want to qualify for many good professions. Of these, many give training jobs so that you can achieve financial independence, but medicine doesn't.
Maybe according to the law he's an independent adult, but actually he's a university student. His parents know the career he's chosen, and probably were very approving.
I wonder if they had to prove that they had the means to support him through his education. If they did then he could walk out and either force them to pay, or apply to a number of hardship funds which most universities have for sudden hardship.
To have control of someone's life and ruin it in this way (and either option is ruining it) is despicable. To take advantage of a power over someone else that he cannot avoid is rather ungodly. This is precisely the reason that freedom is so valuable: because people, even devout Christians, cannot be trusted to understand and respect autonomy and free will.
Maybe according to the law he's an independent adult, but actually he's a university student. His parents know the career he's chosen, and probably were very approving.
I wonder if they had to prove that they had the means to support him through his education. If they did then he could walk out and either force them to pay, or apply to a number of hardship funds which most universities have for sudden hardship.
To have control of someone's life and ruin it in this way (and either option is ruining it) is despicable. To take advantage of a power over someone else that he cannot avoid is rather ungodly. This is precisely the reason that freedom is so valuable: because people, even devout Christians, cannot be trusted to understand and respect autonomy and free will.
Enkidu Warrior
Ultramagnetic
I'm not sure that's really true. Any parent supporting their child through university can really screw them up by cutting them off at the worst possible time. Even where there are measures in place to provide support to students who can't rely on their parents, a well timed threat to disown you would still be enormously powerful to the vast majority of students in any country. Of course this is something that no even barely decent parent would consider inflicting on their child, but if some backwards pondlife want to ruin their kid's life, I don't think we can stop them. I suppose a strong society should ostracize the parents and ensure that the child can get the support they need to complete their studies without the support of their vile parents. I doubt that either will happen in this case, which is a great shame, but even if it did, the threat would remain hugely powerful.
Normally students leave home when they go off to university.
Yes. You can argue about it and try to convince someone, but if he doesn't want to be convinced, it accomplishes nothing.
No. You cannot change opinions, but you can try to make actions illegal.
No, we as society should offer them a way out of that dependance. Everyone should have the ability to make his own life. Then these parents could be bigots as much as they want, but it wouldn't matter.
Enkidu Warrior
Ultramagnetic
Exactly. Most of us accept that our families have power over us in one way or another because we love them and trust that they would never abuse that power. I'll admit that I'll never understand the supposed anguish of this backwards family, but for them to so enraged that they used their power over their own son to threaten to ruin his life and coerce him into this torture camp strikes me as unambiguously evil.
Enkidu Warrior
Ultramagnetic
Many do, but a significant minority attend universities close to home for convenience, cost, or personal reasons. They are not freaks.
Talkie_Toaster
I toast, therefore I am
30% of medical students live at home. This guy is not unusual in the slightest. Even if it was, it WOULD NOT MATTER. They're forcing him to go to this brainwashing camp against his will.
aneeshm
Deity
Even if the parents were perfectly within their legal rights, that still doesn't make their action morally right in any way. The law is the lower bound on behaviour - individuals are expected to stay well above this limit in their normal lives. The ones who keep relying on it to decide the acceptability of their behaviour are either career criminals or the scum of civilised society.
In this case, I'd say that the actions of the parents are disgustingly immoral. They display a complete lack of common humanity. They also show that they have no understanding whatsoever of homosexuality, nor any command over logical thinking. In a word, they suck.
In this case, I'd say that the actions of the parents are disgustingly immoral. They display a complete lack of common humanity. They also show that they have no understanding whatsoever of homosexuality, nor any command over logical thinking. In a word, they suck.
Enkidu Warrior
Ultramagnetic
Wow, I agree completely. Very well put.
MobBoss
Off-Topic Overlord
That has to be a joke.
Why cant the parents say if you embark on something we dont agree with we are simply not going to support you?
If there were any validity to the kidnapping charges, dont you think the police would have acted upon it?
RedRalph
Deity
- Joined
- Jun 12, 2007
- Messages
- 20,708
No, its not. I presume the answer is no, but why? My politics? My religious views?
Enkidu Warrior
Ultramagnetic
Common human decency? They didn't have to agree to fund him through university, but ditching him part way through is super low. Haven't you yourself said that you'd support your kids if they turned out gay even though you wouldn't approve? How can you approve of these people using their son's love for them as a weapon against him?
warpus
In pork I trust
Because he's not embarking on anything, he just is the way he is.
The parents overreacted. It's a bit sad that there is a community out there that supports them in this bs.
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