Rammy's Revenge, or, How to Take Over the World and Regain your Honour

[YourDeath/TSAR]

btw, if u want i can help u create the website, im pretty good at drawing cartoons as background, and i have loads of time

 

[YourDeath/TSAR]

DONT READ IT MZROKKS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

sorry civ'ed, but my assasin started chasing a ice cream van when he was about to kill abdul...stupid assasins

 

[Civ'ed]

Aaaargh!!!! SEND A NEW ONE!

 

[YourDeath/TSAR]

DONT SEE THIS MZROKKS, its just me helping civ'ed, it has nothing to do with killing abdul, we love abdul.....

Spoiler :

dude, i think abdul works with the north koreans..... i even got a picture of my second assasin being nuked!!! RIP for my second assasin (btw, i killed my first assasin). Our last chance is Stewie from family guy first picture is my second assasin dying, second picture is stewie

 

[sukritact]

I love this, but the bad thai is making me confused. I loved the ปัญญาควายเอ้ย though.

 

[Yoshiegg737]

Don't suggest something like that! I meant (Mzrokks may not see this):

Spoiler :

Has he been poisoned yet?

I guess that explains why the technology advisor died under mysterious circumstances after playing "switch the drink"

 

[YourDeath/TSAR]

hehe, nice yoshiegg!

 

[Civ'ed]

i guess that explains why the technology advisor died under mysterious circumstances after playing "switch the drink"

tsaaaaaaar!!!!!

 

[Mzrokks]

Rammy: A samurai? Excellent! Come, friend, and help us defeat the wretched Askia!
Oda: Who's Askia? I haven't met him yet.
Rammy:


King Rammy gathers his troops for a pre-battle pep talk.
"Now, listen, men. Askia may be Evil, but he isn't stupid. He'll send hundreds, thousands even, of his best warriors. They may have superior technology. I can offer you no defense agaisnt that. All I can offer is blood, tears and sweat! Askia may send numberless legions of far-future fighters, and can I protect you from those? No! ALL I CAN PROTECT YOU FROM IS COWARDICE! YOU SHALL JOIN WITH ME! WE SHALL LIVE, FIGHT AND DIE TOGETHER IF NEEDS BE! AND YOU WILL NOT BE DOING IT FOR JUST ME! YOU WILL BE DOING IT FOR YOUR FAMILIES, YOUR CHILDREN, AND THEIR CHILDREN TOO! YOU WILL CHARGE WITH ME FOR SIAM!!!"

King Rammy scratches his head. "That, my friends," he says. "Is what we call...
An Anticlimax."



Jokes aside, I expected a large force, perhaps six or seven spearmen and a couple of horses? But he sends a spearman and two warriors. Horsemen attacking over a river, into a forest still nearly blew up a warrior.
So I lead my troops to the Songhai lands. Hoorah! 2 or more free cities to take!


It would be unfair to call Askia's strategy as good as a 4 year old's. Sending 3 mediocre troops to take two well defended cities. Yep. That would be insulting to 4 year olds.
At least he realises quickly when he's in big trouble, I'll give him that.

Rammy: Nope. You started it.

 

[Bob_]

And THIS is the point the whole world will forever consider you a bloodthirsty warmonger. Even the civs you havent met yet

 

[Yoshiegg737]

Obviously, Askia's better troops are busy saving his Granmama

 

[YourDeath/TSAR]

errr, my assasin killed his grandma.......

 

[Civ'ed]

errr, my assasin killed his grandma.......

Whaddaya mean, your assasin?

 

[Mzrokks]

Catherine: Greetings. Yuri, сколько больше из этих идиотов вне там?
Rammy: I beg your pardon?
Catherine: Oh, nothing, nothing. Я отнесу дружески вам для теперь, но более поздно я backstab вы и сгорю ваши города как смертоносная русская собака я!
Rammy: I'm sorry, I never did learn Russian.
Catherine: Of course not. Такой красивейший или/и сложный язык никогда не приспосабливал бы в ваш мозг, который очевидно как мал как ваше положение. Отсутствие обиды, конечно - он как раз что вы вертикально брошены вызов.



What's wrong with this picture?
Anyway, my plan for world domination isn't going too badly. I'll destroy Askia in a moment, but for now, I have this to worry about.

Could three of my opponents really be going for a cultural victory? Oh well, maybe they'll have puny armies and make my job easier.




Askia's defences were just sad. My small troop of spearmen and horseys easily overwhelmed his two, rather stunned, warriors.

Where art thou, cunning, backstabbing Askia from my Egypt story? In the above picture he rushed a settler and settled there in desperation. His plan failed.

This is Askia before he lost his last city. Just, truly sad. Doubling my number of cities really didn't give me any satisfaction.
One thing's certain.
He underestimated me once. And that was enough to seal the fate of the Songhai.

Spoiler :

Askia: Ramkhamhaeng, is that you?
Rammy: (Looking down at Askia, lying in the ruins of his palace) Yes, it's me.
Askia: (Clutches Rammy's sandals) How could you?
Rammy: I could. :suicide:

Askia the Foolish of the Songhai
RIP

 

[Sparthage]

That Russian conversation was pretty funny.

 

[LamaGT]

lol i am russian and i can't understand what's written there .-.
google translate sucks

 

[Yoshiegg737]

Now you must destroy Lizzy

 

[Sparthage]

google translate sucks

Yep, I also speak some Russian and Spanish and I usually find that Google does a pitiful job. When people in my language classes use those translator sites, it's usually obvious.

 

[Yoshiegg737]

Yep, I also speak some Russian and Spanish and I usually find that Google does a pitiful job. When people in my language classes use those translator sites, it's usually obvious.

I use the translator to translate 1 word at a time then I jumble the resultings words so that it ends up worse than the translator

 

[Civ'ed]

Lol Catherine is mean