1. We have added a Gift Upgrades feature that allows you to gift an account upgrade to another member, just in time for the holiday season. You can see the gift option when going to the Account Upgrades screen, or on any user profile screen.
    Dismiss Notice

Shake and Then Throw Plastic or Resin Numbered Polyhedrons to Preside Over Segments of Planet Earth

Discussion in 'Imperium OffTopicum' started by Double A, Jun 26, 2019.

  1. Robert Can't

    Robert Can't Grantaire

    Joined:
    Dec 7, 2007
    Messages:
    3,151
    Location:
    The Barricade
    The washington died. It was very sad.
     
  2. Danwar

    Danwar Warlord

    Joined:
    Dec 30, 2017
    Messages:
    190
    Gender:
    Male
    Of course Washington has passed from this mortal coil - He did a long time ago. But afterwards, he ascended into the heavens to become the One True Divine Protector of The Multiverse, Earth, Mankind and America. That is indisputable truth.
     
    Last edited: Aug 20, 2019
  3. Crezth

    Crezth 話說天下大勢分久必合合久必分

    Joined:
    May 26, 2006
    Messages:
    10,426
    Location:
    北京皇城
    GODZILLA ANNOUNCES HIS CANDIDACY FOR PRESIDENCY OF THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA



    "DOES YOUR REPRESENTATIVE HAVE ATOMIC BREATH?"

    Vote early, vote often!
     
    Danwar and Robert Can't like this.
  4. Tolina

    Tolina trust the pillars with your s e c r e t s

    Joined:
    Feb 20, 2013
    Messages:
    10,513
    Location:
    Nightvale, US
    electoralism i can agree with
     
  5. JohannaK

    JohannaK Careless Whisperer

    Joined:
    Oct 13, 2011
    Messages:
    13,706
    Location:
    Last Christmas
    This is a disgusting revisionist experiment and the Presidium of the Central Committee for the General Assembly decrees it is outlawed.
     
  6. Danwar

    Danwar Warlord

    Joined:
    Dec 30, 2017
    Messages:
    190
    Gender:
    Male
    Your 'Central Committe' and its tyrrany shall not exist forever, and neither shall the perfidious Mann imperium. True Democracy and the light of Washington shall prevail over all!
     
    Double A likes this.
  7. Double A

    Double A ♫We got the guillotine♫

    Joined:
    Aug 22, 2009
    Messages:
    14,178
    Location:
    NC
    1: Tyrants get -10 on rolls next round.

    Please inform me if you are a tyrant so I can penalize you.
    96: if you are reading this, you are now Americanist

    77: The people responsible for this failure have been sacked. Their replacements confer a +3 bonus on murder, logistics, and murder logistics.

    97: the poors now have jobs supporting the wholesale massacre of other poors. They are very happy. Make that +3 bonus up there a +5.
    17+5 I guess: I haven't been paying enough attention to know what you're talking about but you can't find any. The opposite is not true, however. Now you only have the First and the Half fleets. -3 on naval actions til you recover.
    25: you bring your nerds what you think is a dead vampire, but it was sleeping. It enthralls half your science department and buggers off. You're probably gonna need to import some smarticles, while the vamps are pretty set with a +2 science bonus.
    32+5: They get drunk and knock over some statues. The media is shocked and outraged. Have fun dealing with the scandal before it blows up!
    15: You succeed in creating resistance groups. You do not succeed in creating friendly resistance groups. The New Eriksonians demand you sod off.
    94: aside from Newfoundland, pretty much everyone is going to vote, and the majority of folks like where things are going right now

    Heh.
    27: while you already turned half of the Half Fleet, they uncontrollably laugh to the point of ineffectiveness whenever they hear your name and are a total liability in combat. -4 penatly til you do something about that.
    15: "GLUB GLUB GLUB?" translation: "HOW BOUT I ASSAULT YOURS INSTEAD?"
    23-4: apparently none of your pirates are self-respecting

    47-4: eh I'll just give you this one since you're ditching land
    this is a great picture
    24: just keep telling yourself that, hoss
    59: termites have invaded Washington's teeth
    25: nobody was sad because nobody died

    poor nobody
    33: [citation needed]
    96: people seem very responsive to godzilla's message. It's gonna be a tight race.
    84: same tbh
    27: they hated Jesus because he was right

    The revisionists launch massive pushback on the Central Committee
    63: and to that end I can be easily convinced to apply the tyranny penalty to the central committee next turn
     
    Ailedhoo and Danwar like this.
  8. Ailedhoo

    Ailedhoo wonderer

    Joined:
    Mar 19, 2012
    Messages:
    7,625
    In light of this: I wish to note that there has been a malfunction at the Project Wardrobe site in Iceland and...

    The Imperium of Man wishes to declare that they deny that a army of orcs, minotaurs, goblins, kobolds and other fantastic beings have sprung through a portal and be leaded by a draconic daddy magus who is currently attempting to take over Iceland. These tales are clearly the invention of dissidents and we urge people to not pay attention to clearly faked videos of dragons flying across from Iceland to Scotland. These rumours are totally false and the Imperium of Man has total control in Iceland. The Emperor, who is clearly the Chosen One, will guide us all in our heroic efforts against the Americans and the Soviets as we strive to unite the world under the order and peace of Mann!

    Praise the Emperor!
     
  9. NinjaCow64

    NinjaCow64 The Continuation of the Dream Supporter

    Joined:
    Apr 4, 2010
    Messages:
    7,757
     
  10. JohannaK

    JohannaK Careless Whisperer

    Joined:
    Oct 13, 2011
    Messages:
    13,706
    Location:
    Last Christmas
    The revisionists are now the Central Committee. Revision this!
     
  11. Danwar

    Danwar Warlord

    Joined:
    Dec 30, 2017
    Messages:
    190
    Gender:
    Male


    With elections prepared and readied to select the President for the next four years, we shall ensure that the elections held are free and fair, and that all, regardless of race, gender, sexuality, or any other factor, so long as they follow the Holy Washington, will be able to vote and elect a new President of the Union. Democracy shall finally begin in earnest!

    In the meantime, however, there is some business to settle. The Washington Guard have been unruly and undisciplined, and so they must be reined in and a public show should be made to show the world we take their drunken rampage seriously and that we will not tolerate indiscipline among our standing forces. Discipline and order must be instilled in our men, lest they fail to serve our country in its times of need.

    With Newfoundland under threat by heretics still seeking to rejoin their blasphemous Saber, we shall send the Airborne unit deployed there to exploit the cracks in the resistance movement we created to dismantle the heretics and build up support from those among the populace who converted to the Faith.

    Our navy has suffered a catastrophic defeat, and must regroup. Send the half-strength fleet to repair, reinforce, and replenish, and hopefully its new battle experience against the Vampires will give us an edge against them. The First Fleet shall cover their retreat.

    It seems science cabinet after science cabinet has been failing to provide any meaningful advances in our goals and even has even hampered us... Perhaps it would be prudent to outsource the job to a private research organization, and to fund them in exchange for them researching ways to defeat the Vampires for us. Capitalism can be useful sometimes.

    With the Vampires retreating from their mainlands, now is the Bisons' chance! Launch a new campaign into the lands of the Vampire Coast with the replenished Bisons, and drive the stake into the heart of the vampiric menace! Without a coastline, their navy cannot be supplied, and will slowly sink to the bottom of the sea!

    Finally, we shall construct a great Cathedral using our streamlined logistics and industrial strength to establish a mighty edifice to the Holy Washington, hopefully allowing more heretics to be converted to His light and to drive away the Saberists on every front! This massive temple will surely win us the favor of the Holy Washington, and so He will guide us to victory in our just wars!
     

Share This Page