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So you walk into this golden room...

Discussion in 'Off-Topic' started by Mr. Dictator, May 12, 2013.

  1. Mr. Dictator

    Mr. Dictator A Chain-Smoking Fox

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    Not a real one! Open your third eye for me, if you can.

    Now, you're in this foolish gold room and, after searching for something you can pawn, decide it's useless. That's when the android appears.

    "Greetings CFC_USER.EGO. Being your first time in the over-mind's financial nexus, you are probably slightly confused. Using state of the art mind-states, we can place you in control of the flow of money throughout the world. Your very consciousness becomes the market. The invisible hand is your hand. Do you have any questions?"

    At this point, you probably have a lot of questions for the android (and probably a lot more for the storyteller) but have a moment to figure out what you'll do.

    So, do you ask the android to put you in control of all of our wealth? Do you try and stretch yourself across the world as well as you can? Do you channel yourself into certain industries, for whatever means you can think of?

    You're in the golden room. What do you do?
     
  2. History_Buff

    History_Buff Knight of Cydonia

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    I would ask that the android help me create some conspiracy that would crash the value of gold and Dunning-Krugerands. Because gold has useful properties, and so I can cackle at idiots, respectively.
     
  3. Borachio

    Borachio Way past lunacy

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    I would ask: "Is it better to spend money than earn it?"
     
  4. Mr. Dictator

    Mr. Dictator A Chain-Smoking Fox

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    "Confusion. Being money, itself, you are free to revert back to any of your pure material forms. However, you also relinquish all control over those forms, since you are no longer a part of the market.

    "When you become the market, spending and earning are two sides of the same coin."
     
  5. Borachio

    Borachio Way past lunacy

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    Have I got time to ask another question?

    Nononono. That wasn't it!

    Doesn't everyone spend and earn? Or doesn't everyone who earns also spend?
     
  6. classical_hero

    classical_hero In whom I trust

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    As long as I don't get a golden shower, I'm happy.
     
  7. JohannaK

    JohannaK Heroically Clueless

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    I make Spain crash. :mwaha:
     
  8. warpus

    warpus In pork I trust

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    But the invisible hand is just a function of the action of many millions of humans. So when I control the invisible hand, do I also control the actions of billions?

    If so, I would probably crash the world economy, because I have a bit of an agenda, and to be honest, I wouldn't really know what I'm doing, as I only have an armchair understanding of world markets. Bacon prices would definitely go down though.
     
  9. Gelion

    Gelion Captain

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    Wait wait wait, I can get control over all of the world's money? Wow... well, I'd buy everything! Once I am done I will organise the things the way I want to and.... God this reminds me of something. Anyways I'd organise things the way I want to and fly off to Mars.
     
  10. Borachio

    Borachio Way past lunacy

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    With power comes responsibility. And why Mars? Surely there are places you'd rather live on Earth?
     
  11. Gelion

    Gelion Captain

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    I know that. Its just I'd like humans to solve at least the problem of ecology and poverty before governments continue to play their power games. Why Mars? Well for one I belive that humans should expand into space. With some money taken away from luxuries we should afford a decent space progam. Two, I don't want to stay here and see all my efforts go to waste. Thats the thing with control (or power as you call it), either you keep it or you loose it. I don't want to become the world's tyrant, I want to fix a few things to let the usual players to come back to their own business in better conditions. And lastly who'd refuse a mastery of a whole world? Gimme Mars and let no one who came with me think that they didn't know what they'd be getting into. This way I won't be conquering old, but building something new.

    So i guess it sums it up.
     
  12. NickyJ

    NickyJ Retired Narrator

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    If I pick up a sledgehammer and hit the Android with it, will thought fly on golden wings?
     
  13. LamaGT

    LamaGT Emperor

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    I'll reroute every single penny of every nation's military budget to space programs. But then, I'll probably refuse because it would mean that I would stop being a human.
     
  14. Mr. Dictator

    Mr. Dictator A Chain-Smoking Fox

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    "Explanatory. Direct, permanent control, of the market is a function that is currently back in the development phase. At the moment, individuals can only take it as an avatar for their will, for a period of time."
     
  15. Dann

    Dann Green bug

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    Don't care about the details and how the job gets done, but I want the global economy to completely collapse, thus leading to wars, nuclear annihilation, and the remnants of the human species reverting back to a hunter-gatherer existence. The way it was meant to be.

    :mischief:
     
  16. TheLastOne36

    TheLastOne36 Deity

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    Any other Mass Effect fans picturing the god-child at the end of ME3? :lol:
     
  17. Gucumatz

    Gucumatz JS, secretly Rod Serling

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    Hmm interesting, at the moment this is what I would do in a theoretical situation

    1. Switzerland burns

    2. I create the first ever corpor-nation

    3. Zimbabwean currency for everyone!

    4. I make the currency of the world cocoa beans once again. Reap what you sow, cash for what you weep

    5. Leave the room, there is only so much damage I could do before it becomes unfun
     
  18. Mise

    Mise isle of lucy

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    I don't really understand what's going on here but I would, for the most part, leave stuff alone, but channel, say, 5% of all short term stock market trades into poverty relief in Africa and Asia. EDIT: Maybe I'd take 5% of all luxury goods sales too. Rolex, Rolls Royce, diamond earnings, stuff like that.
     
  19. choxorn

    choxorn Watermelon Headcrab

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    Steal all the money in the world, then randomly redistribute it.

    Well, mostly randomly. I'd keep a few million (US) bucks for myself. :mischief:
     
  20. Farm Boy

    Farm Boy Deity

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    First you get the money, then you get the power, then you get the women.

    Actually, that's kind of terrifying. Seeing as you can get tired of anything if you have it all the time. What left would there be to do if I got bored? Take up carpentry or gardening? <shudders>

    I would at least definitely kill those payday loan places. Usurious parasites.
     

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