Something I found from the Funny Pages

[Illusion13]

How many Virginia University Students Does it Take to Change a Lightbulb?


How many William & Mary students does it take to change a light bulb?
Three, one to change the bulb, and two to crack under the pressure.

How many Old Dominion students does it take to change a light bulb?
Four, two to change the bulb, and two to figure out how to get high off the old one.

How many Mary Washington students does it take to change a light bulb?
The whole student body, there's nothing better to do on weekends.

How many Georgetown students does it take to change a light bulb?
Two, one to change the bulb, and one to throw the old bulb at American U students.

How many UVA students does it take to change a light bulb?
One, he just holds the bulb and lets the world revolve around him.

How many Virginia Tech students does it take to change a light bulb?
Three, one to change the bulb, and two to discuss how they did it as well as a UVA student.

How many James Madison University students does it take to change a light bulb?
None, Harrisonburg doesn't have electricity.

How many Virginia Commonwealth students does it take to change a light bulb?
None, downtown Richmond looks better in the dark.

How many Eastern Mennonite U students does it take to change a light bulb?
Two, one to hold the candle, and the other to strike the flint.

How many George Mason University students does it take to change a light bulb?
Three, if they get lucky and one of them has taken the course at NOVA.

How many Washington and Lee students does it take to change a light bulb?
Four, one to change a bulb, and three to write up a complaint to the board of directors stating that they could have gone to a better school if they had wanted to.

How many Mary Baldwin students does it take to change a light bulb?
Four, One to change the light bulb, and three to figure out how it will help them meet their future husband.

How many U of Richmond students does it take to change a light bulb?
Two, one to mix the martinis and one to call the electrician.

How many Hollins College students does it take to change a light bulb?
None, that's what maids are for.

How many Radford University students does it take to change a light bulb?
Just one, but it takes six years.

How many Sweet Briar Students does it take to change a light bulb?
The entire student body, once they hear the word screw.

How many Randolph-Macon Woman's College students does it take to change a light bulb?
One, if she can handle four majors she sure as hell can handle changing a light bulb.

 

[Gengis Khan]

Might be funnier if you actually went to any of those schools.

 

[The Person]

Awesome.

[compliment]My view --> [/compliment]

 

[Pirate]

How many Penn State students does it take to change a light bulb?
None, all Joe Paterno has to do is say "Let there be light!"


And I DID go to Penn State...

 

[Illusion13]

Answers to Driving School Tests


The following are purportedly a sampling of REAL answers received on exams given by the California Department of Transportation's driving school (that is, Saturday Traffic School for moving violation offenders.)


Do you yield when a blind pedestrian is crossing the road?
What for? He can't see my license plate.

Who has the right of way when four cars approach a four-way stop at the same time?
The pickup truck with the gun rack and the bumper sticker saying, "Guns don't kill people. I do."

What are the important safety tips to remember when backing your car?
Always wear a condom.

When driving through fog, what should you use?
Your car.

What problems would you face if you were arrested for drunk driving?
I'd probably lose my buzz a lot faster.

What changes would occur in your lifestyle if you could no longer drive lawfully?
I would be forced to drive unlawfully.

What are some points to remember when passing or being passed?
Make eye contact and wave "hello" if he/she is cute.

What is the difference between a flashing red traffic light and a flashing yellow traffic light?
The color.

How do you deal with heavy traffic?
Heavy psychedelics.

What can you do to help ease a heavy traffic problem?
Carry loaded weapons.

 

[Illusion13]

btw, who has more lightbulb jokes? And nice one bout Penn State