The Begining
In the Beginning of Time, there was only Chip, born from the wishes of those yet unborn. With theomnipotenence he posessed from being the only thing, he set to work. We created the True Universe and all of its planes. For them he created the universal laws(sceitific laws, laws of physics). He created time and waited. As he waited, a he pondered his existence. While he pondered, planetsa formed, star sprang to life. And he found the answer to his pondering. Why should he be the only one who could do this. And a thought immerged in his brain. This thought was life. And he brought life into being and created life to inhabit his creation. His large work complete, he settled himself in a planet, inhabiting with his spirt, and this planet thrived. He last creation was for this planet alone. From his loins sprung the Last Creation. This Creation was humanity.
Book of Future Prophet of Micalian
1
When the world was created by Chip their was Humanity. They lived good and peacful lives. But their was a problem. Their world was very, very boreing. So, Chip gave them a god known only as Micalian. Micalian would teach the people all things f-ing awesome and rad.
For hundreds of years Micalian tried to teach the people but he was not succesful. What was his problem? How could he help the people live exciting lives. And above All, be realy COOL. Then one day durring a very unsucesful party Micalian talked to a man called "I am the Future". After talking to "I am the Future" for a while Micalian took a drink of rather old Grape Juice. This Grape juice gave Micalian a very strange feeling. He quickly decided that this was Rad. And since he was with I am the Future when it happened HE thought that I am the Future must be rad too.
Micalian told I am the Future all of the secrets of the universe. Which didn't take a long time and turned out to not be all that rad. But, After knowing the secrets of the Universe I am the future had one very, very good idea. He would make this thing he called beer, he would then make television, and on this television he would advertise the beer with hot women who say they like guys who drink the beer.
The invention of beer setup a chain reaction in the world. Their was soon other even Cooler drugs. Then their was War and soon after War ROCK MUSIC! Yes Micalian had done it, He had made the world f-ing awesome and totally rad!
2
The End.
People of Chip, The Great and "RAD" One known as Micalian has sent me message of The End. It was told to The "RAD" One by His Sweetness Chip. Chip has coriographed a great ending for this project called life. One day once the holy Chiphad has been compleated and the people of the earth complete one of the 6 holy quests he shall apear to us again. The Holy Quests are parelless. But with out these quests man will never be able to fully reconnect with Chip. So shall the Holy Quests of Chip be presented upon the followers of SwissEmpire.
* Cleansing the Earth of all impure nations
* Controlling the lands and creatures of Chip
* Spreading the good and rad word of Chip
* Journeying to the sky to be with Chip
* Proving your manipulation of others through the Lord Chip
* Or running out of time in this place
Once a single one of these holy events has taken place. Chip shall reveal himself to the people and give them a holy sign. THis sign shall proclaim to them that they as followers of Chip have truely won. He shall then ask if they wish to continue. This decision can only be made by the people. Once this is done. Credits shall fill the great screen reading only one name for producer, animate, coder, etc. Chip.
The End.
3
After The End their is the Abyss. In the Abyss their is nothing, and thus nothing is there. In the souls of those who are not taken by the Omega Cat there too is nothing, and thus it is logical to think that they must be in the Abyss. SO in the Abyss which contains nothing lay the souls of those not taken by the Omega Cat.
Inside the nothingness that is the Abyss there is Muchness. Inside this Muchness is the paradise of Perosofo. Perosofo is reserved for those that have led good lives in the eyes of the Holy Chip. All those who have been taken by the Omega Cat but Chip dosent see fit to move into the paradise known as Perosofo are sent back to the Earth to relive a more fitting existence of the Great and Wonderful Chip.
And those the lands of the Earth will End. And the Holy Credits will role. And after words the Abyss will set in. And in the Abyss which contains nothing a center of Muchness will exist. Inside of taht Muchness will be the paradise of Perosofo where the souls of those taht Chip feels have led a good life shall reside for the rest of eternity.
The tale of Harocht
I have discovered ancient ruins with inscriptions of ancient text stained with blood. After I managed to read the runes a giant man appeared in front of me equipped with a huge sword made of gold and a shield made of crystal, he wore full body metal armor with a necklace made of human bones around his neck. He spoke to me, "I am Harocht, Almighty God of Wars, Death and Illness! You have reached the spot where I slew the great army of demons sent forth by Tac-Nal, God of the Underworld and Spirits. When your people engage in battle they are to pray to me so I may gift them with victory!" He threw me a small sword and shield, the Shield engraved with the rituals we must perform for battle and the sword engraved with my name and the title, Head Disciple of Harocht and Great Warrior. He then dissapeared with a trail as wisp of black smoke followed. The shield also mentioned that the month of October know known as Chadoshmet (month of war), each day a small blood offering must be made to Harocht to ensure survival and freedom of illness.
Propecies of cIVpasIVe
1
1:1 In the not so distant past, but longer ago than you would normally imagine, Chip created humanity. In his divine wisdom, he gave them the gift of communication. Through the transfer of thoughts and ideas, humans prospered through collective reasoning. Chip saw this and knew it was good, if not a little boring (all the incessant talking was giving Chip a headache). 1:2 Thusly, Chip brought unto them the god Micalian, god of the all things awesome and rad. Micalian taught humans, particularly one known as I am the Future, the art of distilling and of brewing. He also taught them the art of cultivating certain powerful herbs. While humanity was smitten with these new creations, there were consequences. 1:3 For the beer, herbs and other intoxicating creations were found to muddle communication. Speech became slurred or so full of ums, dudes and long pauses that humanity began to forget all it had previously mastered. 1:4 Humanity fragmented and spread to the far reaches of the planet, taking with them selective memories of what had previously been known by all: agriculture, the wheel, mysticism, mining, hunting and fishing. 1:5 This made Chip weep, and his tears quickly flooded a previously dry valley. Thus, a great Sea was made, salty from the water shed by Chips eyes. 1:6 However, Chip was not one to wallow, for he is an active and forthright god. He then created the goddess Papirus to bring permanent communication to humanity. 1:7 Chip made Papirus goddess of rite-ing, of let-hers, of pap-her, and of enck. 1:8 It is true humanity lacks a current understanding of the power of these things, and has no ability to yet utilize their strengths. Yet Chip, with his forethought, has brought us Papirus to show us these things, so that humans may make knowledge and thought permanent and easy to transfer to one another. 1:9 The gifts of Papirus will allow humanity, even in its Micalian-induced intoxicated fervor, to record forever that which is worth remembering. 1:10 Thusly, the month of September shall now be called Vulgotempo, for devotion to making of the written word.
2
2:1 As has been written, Chip created humanity in His great wisdom. 2:2 However, Chip did not immediately interact with His creation. He allowed us to mature through indirect guidance and through the natural course of events. 2:3 Then, when the time came for Chip to reveal himself, he appeared to a man, Swissy, in a field where wild sow fed on grass and grubs. It was there that Chip came upon the herder in the form of another human and spoke to him. 2:4 It was there he first said, I come and bid you greetings. How does it go? 2:5 Swissy, used to interacting only with sow, was frightened, and fell off the rock he was sitting on. Who are you, who comes out of nowhere? 2:6 Chip smiled at the herder, saying, I am the one who has created all things and named them. I created all of this world for you, and I created you for me. 2:7 This statement was not readily believed, not because Swissy was a faithless man, but because he lacked the imagination to conceive of the person before him doing so much. Therefore, he said unto Chip, Yeah? Prove it. 2:8 At this, Chip said, Very well. He pointed straight down at the ground and a shrub erupted from the soil and bloomed leaves. He pointed straight out at the shrub and it burst into white flames. He waved his hand over the bush, and a mighty wind was stirred that blew the fire out. He then pointed to the sky and dark clouds formed and rain fell, causing the shrub to bloom large, fragrant flowers of indescribable beauty. 2:9 Chip the looked at Swissy and said, Do you now believe? The herder looked at the shrub, breathed in the calming fragrance of its blooms, smiled and said, Do I have a choice? 2:10 To this, Chip said, No. You dont. However, everyone else who has not seen me with their own eyes has a choice. I shall give them the gift of faith. And whosoever accepts and keeps this faith shall be rewarded abundantly when they reach Perosofo, the Perfect Paradise I have created for them. 2:11 Swissy stood amazed. He asked, how shall those who have this faith show it? Chip replied simply, Make testament to what I have done. 2:12 It is by this that Swissy the First, Head Acolyte of Chip, did pass on the Sign of Chip: Point down at the ground, Point straight out, Wave your had horizontally in front of you, and Point Upward toward the sky. 2:13 The Sign of Chip has been thusly translated to mean: Point down you were born of this earth; Point straight out but your life here; Wave hand does not matter; Point upward it is your life in Perosofo that you should seek.
3
3:1 It is assumed, though Chip has not revealed it directly to his followers, that he is immortal. For his life spans greater than the heavens, and while his patience is not infinite, his benevolence has no end. 3:2 When Chip created humanity, in his limitless foresight, he cut the strings of our unnatural longevity and gave us the gift of mortality. 3:3 Mortality is rightly a gift. For life on this planet is difficult, and full of toil and strife. While Micalian, Lord of Enjoyment, brings us that which is awesome and bestows upon us the Holy Rad, it is simply not enough to overcome the shortfalls of our current lives. 3:4 That is why Chip also gave us the gift of Perosofo, the Perfect Paradise. It is more wondrous than can be described and exceeds every imaginable pleasure (no, really, it does)! 3:5 Perosofo is so wonderful, in fact, many of our ancestors were doing everything within their power to get there as fast as possible. Humans were wrestling with bears, conducting unsafe experiments with fire and precariously stacking huge stones into building without mortar. 3:6 What many of our ancestors did not realize was that the Omegacat is a crafty and jealous Lord. Chip quickly realized too many humans were willingly expiring before they had a chance to prove themselves through good works and mighty deeds. Consequently, the Omegacat was taking many of our forefathers for his own, denying them a chance to reach Perosofo or be reincarnated. 3:7 It was then that Chip, through his almighty wisdom, created Mandition, the God of Common Sense. 3:8 Chip gave Mandition charge over his humans, and bade Mandition to protect us from doing that which is ill-advised or foolhardy. Through Mandition, humans began to shy away from that which caused an early exit from this planet, and thusly Omegacat was foiled by the mighty Chip. 3:9 Mandition, as testament to his great and mighty deeds, as well as his useful advice, is known today as the Holy Protector of Life.
The Visions of Benegence
1
1)In a manner most strange a sleeping vision visited me. It was more than a dream but less than reality. In this strange vision the future was laid out like the flowing of a river.
2)Upon a great plain I saw herds of large four legged beasts. These beasts moved as the wind; faster than even the swiftest man could run. Across the plain they roamed wild and free.
3)Then did the majesty of the Great Chip fill my vision and instead of wild beasts I did see the same animals being watched and protected by a distant figure. Swiftly then was I transported onto the plain and as I went I could see that the beasts had been tamed and answered to the call of the figure.
4)When finally I stopped I was face to face with the figure keeping watch over the animals. Then I heard a great voice speaking to me of things I did not know.
5)"This task have I set for you Bengeance. You must leave your home and all of your possesions. You must go unto this place and keep watch over my herd; for one day you and they will be needed. Tame these wild beasts and name them as it please you, but know that one day I will return to you and call upon your service."
6)Such was the power and might in this voice that I shook and was mute. Only then did I know that the figure I had seen was not a stranger but was me as I was to become.
7)I was startled out of my sleep with this image firmly placed in my mind and the instructions of the Chip written upon my heart.
8)So it was that I left my home in Boaring Wallow knowing only that I was drawn south. I did not know my destination but I knew that I was to spend many days on my journey.
9)I also knew what I was to call these beasts which were to be my charge. In the language of my ancestors it meant "running before the wind." These strange creatures would henceforth be known as Horse.
2
1)Many days had I traveled on my wandering path. I don't know how long I had traveled only that someday I would find the Horse Plains. Then as I finished my prayers to Chip I saw someone moving in the distance. The figured approached me from the west, the direction of the Sea of Chip, that holy sea formed by the tears of Chip in ancient times.
2)The figure approached me and called to me. "Hail and Welcome Bengeance. I was told that you would pass this way. I do not wish to delay your travels only to greet you and tell you that you do not travel alone. Chip has spoken to me and instructed me to deliver a gift to you and to pronouce a blessing upon you."
3)Then, amazed, I asked the man who he was. he told me "I am cIVpassIVe, prophet of Chip and High Priest of Boaring Wallow. Soon, I will make my presence known to the city of thy birth but first I was instructed to visit with you."
4)Great was the wisdom and guidance of Chip to send to me someone to aid my journey and give me direction. I asked the prophet if he knew the way I was to follow. "That I don't know good friend, but I give you this gift and this blessing to speed you on your way."
5)"May Chip speed your way, great Bengeance, and may He protect thee from harm of bear or wolf. May he clear your path through the glen, and may he rise your feet above the rushing waters of all rivers."
6)"In His benevolence, he has chosen you to bring us Horse. May your endeavor be blessed and fruitful. Now go, spread the Word of Chip, and the bounty which is His, to all those who are in need of all things awesome and rad!"
7)Then did he make the sign of Chip before me and give me a small barrel containing a sweet smelling liquid. He would not say more and I did not press him for I knew he followed the visions given to him by Chip. The prophet cIVpassIVe left me and I sat down to contemplate what had happened.
8)As the day waned and dusk settled over the land I was struck by a deep thirst. Seeing no spring or lake and finding my waterskin empty I was left to breach the barrel the prophet had given me. The first smell was like the aroma of life itself, full, sweet, and lively. Dipping my hands into the liquid I took a drink.
9)A strange euphoria came over me and I was immediately carried into another vision. This time it was not the Horse which I saw but a beautiful woman. She glowed with an inner radience that bit deep into my heart. When she spoke her voice whispered like the slightest breath of wind against my face.
10)"Bengeance, Mighty Chip has sent me to you. It is you who will reveal me to the peoples of this world. You will be my emmisary and my servant. You will help me shape this world and bring the gifts of the gods into the lives of men. You will know me as Alvaro. I will lead you on your path and I will guide your hand. Through you will much be revealed that is now hidden. Rest well and think upon what I have told you when you wake."
11)When I woke I saw that the cask given to me by the prophet was empty. I knew that it had given me this vision. I knew that it had been blessed by the hand the prophet and by the will of Chip. I bore up the empty shell and carried it on with me. I knew it's purpose was not yet finished.
12)Alvaro visited me several times as I continued my journey and much did I learn from her. I learned that she was the Goddess of Horses and the daughter of Harocht and Papirus. I knew I was just learning the extent of her domain but much time remained on my journey. Many other things did I learn, but those belong to another time and another story.
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