The lamest jokes you can think of....... II

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She left a note on the fridge saying, "This isn't working. Good-bye."
So I opened it. It works just fine...
 
Cigarettes are like squirrels - they are perfectly harmless until you put one in your mouth and light it on fire.
 
My friend said, "Cheer up! Things could be worse... you could be in an deep hole full of water."
I know he means well...
 
The human brain is amazing... It functions 24/7 from the moment you're born, unless you're taking an important test or talking to someone attractive.
 
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Oh, God. :p
 
"Sir, I know it's not really my place as your secretary to ask, but why did you hire a German Communist to be the station's new weatherman?"

"Because Rudolf the Red knows rain, dear."
 
I've just figured out what Trump has been trying to say for the last year... Its actually, "Make America grate again!"
 
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