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The Llamast Jokes Thread... 3

Discussion in 'Humor & Jokes' started by Uncle Sparky, Dec 31, 2017.

  1. Uncle Sparky

    Uncle Sparky Pheasant Plucker

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    I just spent a week staying at an Air BnB in a repurposed nuclear power plant.

    My reviews are glowing.
     
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  2. Serutan

    Serutan Eatibus Anythingibus

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    I've heard the Air BnB's in repurposed missile silos are a real trip.
     
  3. Uncle Sparky

    Uncle Sparky Pheasant Plucker

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    People have often asked me why I became a book editor.

    To cut a long story short.
     
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  4. Serutan

    Serutan Eatibus Anythingibus

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    Apologies if this is in one of the picture threads...

     
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  5. Uncle Sparky

    Uncle Sparky Pheasant Plucker

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    Son: Dad, what are condoms used for?

    Dad: They're use to avoid questions like that.
     
    Last edited: Jul 14, 2020
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  6. Arakhor

    Arakhor Dremora Courtier Moderator

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    What do you call a snake that’s exactly 3.142 metres long? A πthon.

    (I hope it gave you Ω laugh.)
     
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  7. Kyriakos

    Kyriakos Alien spiral maker

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    Πλιζ λιβ νάου.
     
  8. Arakhor

    Arakhor Dremora Courtier Moderator

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  9. Uncle Sparky

    Uncle Sparky Pheasant Plucker

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    I cannot decide whether to be a bard or a thief in my next D & D adventure.

    I need to weigh the prose and cons...
     
    Last edited: Jul 13, 2020
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  10. Uncle Sparky

    Uncle Sparky Pheasant Plucker

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    Most ceramic garden figures are about 60 cm (about 2 feet) tall and have red hats.

    This is a little gnome fact.
     
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  11. Serutan

    Serutan Eatibus Anythingibus

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    Especially as relates to Linux desktops.
     
  12. Serutan

    Serutan Eatibus Anythingibus

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    A friend of mine told me about his kid breaking their arm while out playing. It was a humerus story.
     
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  13. Uncle Sparky

    Uncle Sparky Pheasant Plucker

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    What do you call a t-rex who sells guns?

    A small arms dealer.
     
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  14. Uncle Sparky

    Uncle Sparky Pheasant Plucker

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    I've decided to kill off a few characters in the book I'm writing.

    Autobiographies can be bland.
     
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  15. Kyriakos

    Kyriakos Alien spiral maker

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  16. Uncle Sparky

    Uncle Sparky Pheasant Plucker

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    There's something I don't like about 'Do Not Touch' signs, but I can't put my finger on it.
     
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  17. Uncle Sparky

    Uncle Sparky Pheasant Plucker

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    Don't let them take the temperature on your forehead when you enter a supermarket. It erases your memory.

    I went shopping for lettuce and milk, and came home with two cases of beer.
     
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  18. Uncle Sparky

    Uncle Sparky Pheasant Plucker

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    Because of COVID-19, for the first time since 1945, the The Scripps National Spelling Bee has been canselled.
     
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  19. Kyriakos

    Kyriakos Alien spiral maker

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    @Arakhor


    What do you call a blind deer?


    Spoiler :

    No idea.
     
    Last edited: Aug 2, 2020 at 3:49 PM
  20. Arakhor

    Arakhor Dremora Courtier Moderator

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    That joke is older than we are. ;)
     
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