Things Your Wife Doesn't Know How To Do

[MacAttack]

For those of us who are not married, girlfriends too.


Replace the trash bag after taking the trash out. The box with the new bags are next to the trash can.

 

[downtown]

Answer her phone, or show up to things on time.

If she wrote a "things downtown doesn't know how to do" list though, it would be WAY longer, and she'd be right.

 

[Timsup2nothin]

Pee standing up.

 

[MacAttack]

oh, nearly forgot this one, close the bathroom door after dropping a deuce. I can't even enter the bedroom at that point.

 

[Gori the Grey]

Check into CFC to see how I might be badmouthing her. Whew!

Just to cover my ass:

Spoiler :

It's a joke, honey.

 

[illram]

Oh man my wife! Don't get me started. Things she does not know how to do:

-sit on the couch and be useless while there are plenty of chores to do;
-cook bad tasting dinners;
-say "yes I'll be right there" and then not move for like 20 minutes, which is super annoying especially when dinner is ready;
-sleep in when there is a need for a second parent;
-fail to plan and then wind up winging things;
-leave the car on empty
-just not do laundry and let a dirty pile of clothes pile up next to the bed;
-not listen;
-forget important dates...
etc.

Fortunately, I can help her get better at all of the above.

 

[Timsup2nothin]

Oh man my wife! Don't get me started. Things she does not know how to do:

-sit on the couch and be useless while there are plenty of chores to do;
-cook bad tasting dinners;
-say "yes I'll be right there" and then not move for like 20 minutes, which is super annoying especially when dinner is ready;
-sleep in when there is a need for a second parent;
-fail to plan and then wind up winging things;
-leave the car on empty
-just not do laundry and let a dirty pile of clothes pile up next to the bed;
-not listen;
-forget important dates...
etc.

Fortunately, I can help her get better at all of the above.

That was so cleverly done I expect it will fly over numerous heads.

 

[cybrxkhan]

I don't have a wife, and I'm not dating anyone currently, so I guess I'll pretend I was my dad answering about my mom.

My dad would probably talk about how much my mother doesn't know about technical stuff, how she doesn't know how to teach herself things, and how to not act like a spoiled fifteen year old princess. Probably a few others.

 

[onejayhawk]

Oh man my wife! Don't get me started. Things she does not know how to do:

-sit on the couch and be useless while there are plenty of chores to do;
-cook bad tasting dinners;
-say "yes I'll be right there" and then not move for like 20 minutes, which is super annoying especially when dinner is ready;
-sleep in when there is a need for a second parent;
-fail to plan and then wind up winging things;
-leave the car on empty
-just not do laundry and let a dirty pile of clothes pile up next to the bed;
-not listen;
-forget important dates...
etc.

Fortunately, I can help her get better at all of the above.

I feel your pain. My wife is a certified chef.

She also can use a clutch, so my kid brother has a favorite gripe that I am denied.

J

 

[Antilogic]

That was so cleverly done I expect it will fly over numerous heads.

You always know when a poster's GF or wife knows they post on this forum.

 

[Kozmos]

Frankly in almost all of my relationships I was the more incompetent one. The only thing I could serve as was the resident technology/IT/technical problem-solver and bug killer. (unless they were of the flying kind in which case I decided to run and leave them as bait)

 

[Timsup2nothin]

Frankly in almost all of my relationships I was the more incompetent one. The only thing I could serve as was the resident technology/IT/technical problem-solver and bug killer. (unless they were of the flying kind in which case I decided to run and leave them as bait)

A man who will face a large flying insect will never lack for female companionship.

 

[IglooDame]

My wife can't calculate a TCP/IP subnet mask worth a damn.

I can't boil cooking water without burning it, so I figure we're even.

 

[nc-1701]

My girlfriend can't:
Drive a stickshift - though I hope to teach her soon.
Talk about her feelings or emotions.
Understand why I won't eat vegetables.
Get sunburned.
Prove limits of functions using delta-epsilon arguments.
Run a 2 minute mile.

Pee standing up.

That's about all I can think of actually...

 

[Light Cleric]

She can't tell if this is a troll thread or not even after reading it like 3 times.

by she I may actually mean me instead

 

[Kennigit]

Exist

 

[Leonel]

Dry off the granite counter top around the bathroom sink after she washes her face!

 

[warpus]

She doesn't know how to exist.

 

[Antilogic]

Run a 2 minute mile.

That has to be an expression or something. I'm pretty sure that's physically impossible for a human to accomplish.

 

[nc-1701]

That has to be an expression or something. I'm pretty sure that's physically impossible for a human to accomplish.

Hence why she can't do it...