Traditions of your fathers...what should you teach your kid?

[rugbyLEAGUEfan]

I suspect you may find much of what you wish to teach them out of your control . School , TV etc may win this fight and you'll end up settling for loving them to bits , good dental hygiene , how to cook a steak and pimping them out to mow the lawns.

 

[NickyJ]

• Religious traditions? Check.
• Ethnic? Check, duh. I wouldn't want him to be ignorant of how rotten the damn Yankees are!
• Political? Half-check. For the different issues, I'd show my kid why I hold my opinions. On a few issues, I'd gently nudge him in what I think is the correct direction.
• Musical? Meh, 1/8 check. I'd just play the music I like when I want to, unless it bothers him. I would let him handle deciding which music he prefers.
• Sports? Seven checks! The Dallas Cowboys sucks. He's got to be taught that! It's like learning the sky is blue!
• Others? Unknown. I can't really think of anything else at the moment.
• The fact that downtown is awesome? Infinite number of checks.
• Forever alone? Check.

 

[schlaufuchs]

My children will grow up appreciating Bay Area sports and good music. The rest is fairly irrelevant, although I also kinda want to raise my future children speaking German; I've always been rather bummed that my mom didn't follow through with it when I was a kid.

*EDIT*: Knowing my family, at least one of my future children will end up going through a welsh nationalist phase, which will be hilarious considering our families entirely tenuous claim on "welshness" will become exceedingly tenuous with the next generation.

 

[BvBPL]

I figured this obviously went without saying, so I didn't include it. That should not be controversial.

I don't think it goes without saying. For one, a positive (ie proactive) approach to instructing children in any given behavior will always be more effective than passive approach. Taking such a positive approach requires more than just suggesting that it goes without saying, instead a conscious effort must be maintained.

Furthermore, there are scads upon scads of children who do not learn proper respect, courtesy, or intellectual curiosity (and, I would like to add, civics) that grow into adults who do not have these attributes. It is a self-repeating cycle and any sane parent, in my mind, should do his utmost to ensure that his children learn these values. Without them, no one will give up a subway seat to you when you are old and gray.
--
Also, WTF is with that drawing of Mr. Potatohead? If we're going to devolve into an image board then why can't people make an effort to display images of a reasonable quality.

 

[Zelig]

I don't really care about any of the stuff in the poll.

Religious traditions - Don't have any.
Ethnic traditions - Don't have any I care about.
Political opinions - Don't have any that I'll share with my kids unless they ask me.
Musical or otherwise artistic tastes - I'll make sure to enroll my kids in some structured music lessons so they can properly appreciate music.
Sports team affiliation - Don't care.

 

[Whiskey_Lord]

Critical thinking and tolerance.

The first one. The second one is questionable. Some beliefs are stupid and destructive and deserve only derision and ridicule.

 

[_random_]

On Sundays, my children will go to church and watch Bengals games. This is non-negotiable.

I don't really have any strong ethnic traditions, since I'm generically white, and the "white identity" thing is kind of frowned upon. If I wind up marrying a sexy ethnic woman, I suppose I wouldn't mind if she shared those traditions.

Politics is a bit of a gray area, but I think it's fine in moderation. My dad is a good deal more conservative than I am (He voted for Santorum!) but I don't fault him for trying to impart his values on me, since he was pretty accepting when I rejected them.

 

[Takhisis]

If he supports Celtic or any English club then we have a problem.

A lot of other things are also handable down (there's a difference between handing down and shoehorning`brainwashing), but Sport is SRS BSNS.

 

[Tee Kay]

All of the above.

The important thing is to allow your kids to see and tolerate other viewpoints too (yes, even sport teams; but of course all my kids will barrack for North Melbourne)

 

[GhostWriter16]

My children will share my religious views as the most important thing I will be teaching them.

No, you're going to teach it to them, they have to decide for themselves. Here is the essential point that makes the thread. You have every right, and in fact I'd say responsibility, to pass your religious beliefs down, but you can't force them to believe.

No child of mine will ever support Liverpool, Chelsea, or Man City. Neither will they be allowed to support San Antonio Spurs. Any child of mine who listens to rap will get a wrap on the knuckles for doing so.

What if its Christian rap?

On Sundays, my children will go to church and watch Bengals games. This is non-negotiable.

Did you really put those two things in the same sentence?

Really?

REALLY?

I'm ashamed

Politics is a bit of a gray area, but I think it's fine in moderation. My dad is a good deal more conservative than I am (He voted for Santorum!) but I don't fault him for trying to impart his values on me, since he was pretty accepting when I rejected them.

That. Its funny when you support your dad on over 85% of views, but not on what candidate you want (As in my case, I want Paul, he wants Santorum, we both know we're getting Romney, which means I go to sleep while dad votes for Romney)

 

[Cheezy the Wiz]

I don't know what I'm going to do. One the one hand, I feel responsible for passing on my aggregate knowledge of the world to my child, so that he or she can build upon what I have done. On the other hand, I don't know that creating a child in my image is the right or best thing to do. I'd like to think that I could perhaps show them multiple paths and let them decide, but what if they picked the worst one? I would be responsible because I'm the parent! How do I balance natural growth with parental direction?

 

[Takhisis]

At least you'll teach your children that Red is the best colour, aren'tcha Cheezy?

 

[Whiskey_Lord]

Teach them to be compassionate and fair-minded, and the Redness will follow naturally.

 

[MagisterCultuum]

You should teach your children why you believe what you believe and prefer what you prefer, but let them make their own decisions on their own beliefs and preferences.


My children would be taken to church with me as I would not want to arrange for alternate childcare during that time. I would make sure that they understand the message of Christianity better than their peers. I'll probably read from Proverbs at bed time when they are quite young, and make sure they are familiar with various patristic writings before high school. I'll do my best to make sure they understand the principle Christian Love, and don't simply follow rules out of fear of punishment. I of course will never resort to threats of Eternal Damnation, as I think Conditional Immortality is much better supported by scripture. I'll share my preference for literal translations over paraphrases that let the biases of translators creep into the word of God. I reject paedobaptism and the belief that there are any sacraments that have any value except as understood by their recipients, so I of course will not have them join any church without informed consent.

I don't really have ethic traditions. I will teach my children to embrace the good and reject the bad in all cultures.

I'll certainly make my libertarian leanings clear and will not be happy if a child of mine rebels by turning fascist, but it would be inconsistent to use force to convince a child to reject the use of force.

I'll sing and listen to some music around them and assume that they'll come to enjoy at least some of it. If they prefer some sort of cacophony I'd at least make them turn the volume down around me.

Loyalty to sports teams is extremely stupid. As Chomsky says, competitive sports are training in irrational jingoism. I would certainly try to convince my children to oppose all such blind loyalty and tribalism.

 

[Narz]

Critical thinking and tolerance.

I'd up tolerance to compassion & those'd be my top two.

I think religion is something a child should be exposed to when they're old enough to think.

On that note I do respect the Mormons for waiting to baptize unless the kid is old enough to think at least somewhat rationally. However, it's still not a real choice if they're pressured from the family to participate.

My dad & I sports teams in common & that was about it (I was a St. Louis Cardinals fan since he was from the MidWest), which didn't help in a school full of Mets fans (back when they were rivals in the NL East).

 

[GhostWriter16]

Ethnic? Check, duh. I wouldn't want him to be ignorant of how rotten the damn Yankees are!

I am one by force, but don't like it. Go CSA!

Political? Half-check. For the different issues, I'd show my kid why I hold my opinions. On a few issues, I'd gently nudge him in what I think is the correct direction.

I really need to convince you of WHY Franklin Delano Roosevelt was such an awful president before you have any kids and try to brainwash them

Sports? Seven checks! The Dallas Cowboys sucks. He's got to be taught that! It's like learning the sky is blue!

If that's so, knowing the New England Patriots suck is like knowing the Earth rotates around the sun. People have been persecuted for the belief, but we all know its the truth

 

[Narz]

You should teach your children why you believe what you believe and prefer what you prefer, but let them make their own decisions on their own beliefs and preferences.

Yeah, I think the most important thing is to explain why you do as you do or believe as you believe. I try to do this even with my three year old (even if she doesn't get what I'm saying I think it's good practice & shows her that I respect her). If she thinks going into the car seat is a horrible burden she'll whine but if she understands it's to keep her safe she still may whine but at least she understands).

Loyalty to sports teams is extremely stupid. As Chomsky says, competitive sports are training in irrational jingoism. I would certainly try to convince my children to oppose all such blind loyalty and tribalism.

Yeah, I remember drunk a-h's yelling crap at me when I went to baseball games rocking my Cardinals gear when I was just a little kid (maybe 7 or 8).

 

[Cheezy the Wiz]

At least you'll teach your children that Red is the best colour, aren'tcha Cheezy?

Teach them to be compassionate and fair-minded, and the Redness will follow naturally.

I wasn't even talking about politics. I meant about much broader issues of morality, spirituality, and dealing with life's problems.

 

[Takhisis]

Aren't non-Communists immoral people? Or are we allowed to say that only in 'Ask a Red'? .

 

[PlutonianEmpire]

The only thing I would do is love my kid. Because I was never loved growing up, and it had a profound effect on me. Not loving your kid (and actually telling them you love them) is one of the worst things you can do to a kid. Never once did my parents tell me they loved me. If I had a kid, I would not repeat those same mistakes.

I recall someone saying (don't remember when or where), that the vast majority of parents vow to not make the same mistakes their own parents made, and yet wind up making those mistakes anyway. I think that the best thing you can do is to realize that, yes, mistakes will be made sometimes, it's a part of life, accept it, and not to beat yourself up over it, and if and when a mistake is made, you do your best to remedy the situation, if possible.

EDIT: Crap. Bottom of the page.

As for me, I don't plan on having kids. I hate them, and I have too many mental issues to sort out. If for some inane reason I do wind up with one, I'll do my best to heed my own advice, and look to my own parents for guidance.