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Winston Churchill a closet Muslim?

Discussion in 'Off-Topic' started by aelf, Jan 22, 2015.

  1. aelf

    aelf Ashen One

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    Forget Barack Hussein Obama. We might have had Winston bin Randolph Churchill.

    Sir Winston Churchill 's family feared he might convert to Islam
    Thanks, multiculturalism!

    What would Quackers say? Was Churchill merely bowing to the imams, who were intent on destroying British culture? Where's his birth certificate?
     
  2. Tahuti

    Tahuti Writing Deity

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    I have heard a very different thing about Churchill and Islam.

    Winston Churchill, on Islam.
     
  3. Ajidica

    Ajidica High Quality Person

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    Relevant BBC article, with relevant part quoted:
    http://www.bbc.com/news/magazine-29701767
     
  4. aelf

    aelf Ashen One

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    Heck, that's mentioned even in the article linked to in the OP.

    Maybe some prefer to live in the Nile.
     
  5. timtofly

    timtofly One Day

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    Saying one thing and doing another is par for the course of most, if not all National Leaders.
     
  6. Tolina

    Tolina trust the pillars with your s e c r e t s

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    Yes, but Churchill wasn't a National Leader in 1899. Hell, he became a Minister of Navy during WWI!
     
  7. warpus

    warpus In pork I trust

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    If you're a closet Muslim, you've got to make sure that your closet gives you enough room to face towards Mecca and bow down. As such, we could easily expose closet Muslims by paying more attention to the way people pick out their homes and how much closet measuring goes on when they're doing a walkthrough.
     
  8. Tolina

    Tolina trust the pillars with your s e c r e t s

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    Winston Churchill insisted for breaking the Ottoman Empire so that he can conquer Levant and build a house which can face always towards Mecca! More in News of the World, shocking new news.
     
  9. Tahuti

    Tahuti Writing Deity

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    Winston Churchill was in fact, a closet Bulgarian. His great-great-great-great-grandfather had the name Boyko Nikolov.

    An assertion, that is based on absolutely nothing, may I add. Still reliable though.
     
  10. Tolina

    Tolina trust the pillars with your s e c r e t s

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    Well, I, for one, can this time vouch that this is false. If he was indeed Bulgarian, Britain would have lost both World Wars. We're really good at winning minor conflicts, then aligning with the wrong powers, and then losing everything.
     
  11. Tahuti

    Tahuti Writing Deity

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    Britain aligned with the USSR and USA during WWII. Guess which countries supported the dismantlement of the British Empire after WWII? Right...
     
  12. Tolina

    Tolina trust the pillars with your s e c r e t s

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    Yes, but they didn't get into essential occupation by a foreign power who set a puppet regime for the next 45 years, who were completely incapable of running a proper economy and drumming an enormous debt by buying patents for factories that would close the moment the resources from Russia, did they?

    The worst UK got is Margaret Thatcher, and the worst thing that she did is laying off several thousand miners and killing some Argentinians.
     
  13. SS-18 ICBM

    SS-18 ICBM Oscillator

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    So he's an Armored Closet Muslim then.
     
  14. aelf

    aelf Ashen One

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    I'm not sure what this is in reference to?
     
  15. warpus

    warpus In pork I trust

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    I think he's saying that every political leader in the world is a Muslim.
     
  16. Narz

    Narz keeping it real

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    Geez, can't we leave the poor guy alone & let him enjoy his 72 virgins in peace?

    Sidenote, once you deflower your 72 virgins do you get 72 new ones?
     
  17. Bugfatty300

    Bugfatty300 Buddha Squirrel

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    They're physically perma-virgins I think. Which seems like a horrible Twilight Zone twist.
     
  18. Narz

    Narz keeping it real

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    I don't understand how that works. They lose both body & mental memory of sex everytime & are always all nervous about it?

    I'd rather have 72 sluts personally. Ok, maybe a few virgins for variety.
     
  19. Tahuti

    Tahuti Writing Deity

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    I think the much vaunted 72 virgins in Muslim Walhalla are actually Vestal Virgins. So enjoy that one-night stand with them, because they are going to end up immured!
     
  20. Tolina

    Tolina trust the pillars with your s e c r e t s

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    Perhaps, in the Heavens, your power ratio is measured by the amount of virgins you have. In other words, 72 virgins is the.. ground zero for the power levels in Heaven.

    The more virgins you have, the better!

    Also, I wonder if you get male virgins alongside the female virgins, so that they can have virgin babies, which will multiply your power level? It's certainly a question I should ask a theologian, although definitely not the ISIS one.
     

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