If Vicky was your neighbour you are probably doomed in spite of all previous suggestions... that means that you chose wrong the order of civs when you configured your game.
is there a way to pick who'll be next to you by what order you enter them on the screen?
even you have Friendly relations with your neighbours you must keep in mind that military weakness will provoke them to attack you. So you must keep at least 4-5 modern units in each border city. As a rule AI attacks you when you are at the straightaway.
none will
decide to declare while friendly, not even monty. there are some leaders who won't decide to declare at pleased. vicky is on the "will declare at pleased" list.
people get confused because the decision to declare war is made well before the war starts. if they already made the decision beforehand, and
then you get up to friendly before they've declared, that's too late. once the decision is made, they go into preparation mode and they DoW no matter what when they're ready. they don't check the relationship again at that point, they just start beating you up. so you will have cases of "so-and-so declared war on me but we were friendly", that's why. some people get that and think "grrrrr, if they declare on me even when we're friendly what's the point of getting to friendly?" but there really is a benefit.
once you've been friendly for a while, or pleased for a while with certain leaders, you're safe as far as he goes. your position on the power curve doesn't matter, weakness won't provoke that particular leader into attacking, once you've laid that groundwork. but it's not a free pass to just look at the diplo screen and think "oh, friendly, i can let my guard down" instantly, because the decision might have been made earlier. and you have to be sure to maintain good relations, send him flowers every once in a while and stuff. and there are still other guys out there to worry about of course!
that is why i well and truly hate victoria. i'm just sick of her nonsense by now. because there are leaders that won't declare at pleased, i just plain don't invite her to games where i don't want to go to war. and if i have to use more leaders than are on my "pick because they won't declare at pleased" list, i don't pick her just out of superstition and bitterness
.
if in doubt at all, build some troops! being high on the power graph is almost never a bad thing. (if you're trying to sign a PA, you don't want to be #1 on the chart is the only exception i can think of *giggle*)
! sounds weird huh?
). Was still targeting early to mid 1400's... certainly better than my 1478 submission. I was clicking through to the end when Vicky decided she had enough of me... DOW in 1310. Stack of knights and maces against 1 Quechua per city defending. Game, set, match! 
