HFC - Cup 4 - Asoka of China.

IMM/Epic

1859 culture

A tribe of men, lead by Asoka the Wise-yet-not-so-wise-as-to-agree-for-life-insurance-at-the-age-of-14 stood apon a hill. Asoka had lead his people here, knowing that in his dream a Diety had visited him. But they waited and waited. But no diety was in sight.

But then the Diety appeared from the clouds, after 2 sacrifices of the Cottage Engineer and the Therapist. He told his people that other 'aliens' had aproched it's land. "Destroy them", he commanded but Asoka defied the command. He made a deal with the Diety, who was halfway through destroying a distant planet in frustration.

And so Asoka-the-souless-leader-of-the-Chineese-for-he-had-sold-his-soul-so-that-he-may-not-be-chained-by-a-chicken-headed-diety Founded the City of Beijing apon the sacred site.

"Oh, we are truley bless with Livestock and Corn!" preached Asoka, "Let us study the art of taming the beasts and command the peasents to farm the animals!".
"So you want us to reaserch Animal Husbandry and build a worker unit?" said Patsy the Corn-husker.
Asoka sighed. "Yes, but it sounds less climactic the way you said it."

Asoka was greeted by a Red-haired courtball leader. "Surely we are blessed in her pressence by the Diety-who-could-be-named-but-won't-for-emphasis!" Preached Asoka.


Asoka is greeted again by the Frog Eater of the Jungle. "We will sacrifice a goat to celebrate this glorious event!" Preached Asoka.
"Sir, Elizabeth is Buddist." Said Patsy the Corn-husker.
"WHAT!?!" Screamed Asoka, "The Diety will not allow such a thing."


Asoka's empire reserched the arts of Animal Husbandry and Masonry! A worker was sent to slave over the resorces.

Asoka is greeted by the Frog Eater's brother from the Middle East! "Quickly, reaserch the Wheel so that we may build roads to these other lovely Civilizations!."
"That would take 100-turns sir, and we only have one worker."
"Shut UP!"


Asoka has great plans for his empire, and knowing that food is power had planed accordingly. Asoka then realised he was landlocked and Patsy pointed out, "you can't sail on the tops of trees sir."


And so, the round ends.
The save, is on Prince/Epic.

Frog-eater of the Jungle

Round 2 - The Religion Explosion​

Asoka summoned the Corn-husker Patsy.
"Patsy, I have met a Spanish fiend called Julius Ceasar, who follows a heaven religion. How shall we proceed?"
"Sir, Ceasar is Hindu. Thus we loath him, as our rules state from the Original Post page."
"...what"
"We can't trade with him sir. We must reject all threats and demands."
"Oh. Very good."


Asoka settled the city of Shanghai. Asoka planes farming the fertile flood-plains around the citys to feed the ever hungry Scientists.
"Have we mastered the secrets of Inscription, oh Corn-husker?"
"Yeah, we've reasechered Writing."
"I hate you Patsy."


Asoka built a new city, located agressivley close to heathen Civilizations.
"What did you call the City, Patsy? Guangzhou?"
"Sir, we have yet to learn the Alphabet. For all we know, Guangzhou could mean Fillibering-dipshit."
"Hmm. Make sure we begining looking into the secrets of this 'Alphphphphablet'.
"Alphabet, sir."
"SHUT UP!"


Asoka was greeted by the Transvestite from South Africa.
"Let us celebrate this event by erecting a statue of him in our Capital!"
"Yes sir."
"Did you just agree with me, of Corn-husker?"


Asoka heard rumours of Heathen Religions spreading like locusts. He ordered Patsy to research these Rediculous insults to the Diety-with-no-religion-as-yet.


Asoka glanced at the map. He realised that the Heathen who was weakest was our Red-haired Mayan, Elizabeth. He orders to build a city agressivley close to the Miserable Insect.
"Patsy, do we have Alphphphphpabettte?"
"No sir, we don't."
"Hmm...do you have any names."
"Nanjing sir. It roughly translate to Hilly-Sub-Par."


Patsy did his latest work.
"Patsy, why is that Frog-Eater from the Jungle in...Unuve...Univre..."
"Universal Sufferage sir. He built the Pyramids, sir."
"Can we aquire it Patsy?"
"Not until the Modern Era, sir. And that would take years of reaserch and labor. Including the fact that we must also addopt a religion by 500AD, sir."
"...you could just say no."
"I could, sir. But that would be a bit dull."


"Oh the heathens of India, lead by the Frog-Eater from the Jungle, must be truley Loyal to thier religion, as they have built many great monuments to display thier devotion."
"They're wonderhogging sir."
"I KNOW WHAT THIER F**KING DOING!!!"
"And how do you suppose we proceed?"
"Foolish Corn-husker, land is power. As the Indians foolishly erect monuments to thier Heathen Religion, we can expand into our large land mass."
"So where boxing them out, then."
"I hate you Patsy."


The Save:

I can say with the utmost certaintenty that I have no idea how to run a SE.
I can also say that I can sevierly crash my economy.

Round 3 - Bugger​

(Patsy enters lord Asoka's chamber. Patsy is wearing a large floral dress, high-heels and a sombrero.)

Patsy Lord, Napoleon wishes to see us.
Asoka What do our bretheren wish, from the mighty (if broke and backwards) Chinese?
Patsy You better come see for yourself.

Napoleon Bonjour! Bonjour, bonjour, bonjour jour. (Hello. Give us writing or we'll kill you.)
Asoka ..what did he say Patsy?
Patsy He said he wants to know if you have any frogs, sir.
Asoka Okay. (Returns to face Napoleon.) No.
Napoleon Bonjour!?! BONJOUR, BON BON JOUR! (Fine. Screw you!).
Patsy He said he is going home because of Digestive Distress.
Asoka Oh. Have fun crapping!


(Soon, a settler reached the new city location. It was named Xian. At this time, Patsy was wearing a cat-outfit from grass while playing Lady Gaga's 'Pokerface' with a tissue, also made from grass pasted together with...grass.)


Asoka I smell the shreedings of a diety, o corn-husker.
Patsy Yeah, Judaism spread into one of our citys. I think we should convert, as the most powerfull nations are in the religion, allowing is to boister our chances with the rules in place.
Asoka Fine...fine. Why aren't you king?
Patsy I don't look like a transvestite sir.


Patsy Sir, we are worst enemys with Ceaser.
Asoka Then we shall erect a thousand monuments of him to display our disgusts! MUHAHAHAHAHA!
Patsy Sir, he is in WHEOOHRN mode, sir.
Asoka And?
Patsy I suggest we bribe someone else into war with him, thus making us less likely to be attacked.
Asoka So no epic monument building then?
Patsy I don't think so, sir.


(The sounds of war railed distantly. The sounds of sponges also sounded as Patsy was Spongebathing Asoka.)


Patsy SIR!
Asoka Yes, o Corn-husker?
Patsy The thing is, uh.... well we have, uh... Napoleon just declared war....sir!
Asoka WHAT! How can this be?
Patsy I believe he wants to find some frogs, sir.


1) We are Definetly getting code of laws.
2) I believe we are, well, screwed as far as running a SE goes. Until Caste System, thus the above.
3) We have...no production citys and our units are going on stike.
4) How do you people survive running a SE economy?

"Remember: patience, discipline," eh?
Fellow Warcraft player?

Level 80 undead priest!
Discipline specced, stopped playing after defeating Professor Putricide.
Will return once Cataclysm have come out.

The amount of times I've mind controled people off the cliffs in Arthi Basin.
I played (and will continue to) play on Aman'thul. The characters name is 'Ghoti'.

Hey Metzi,

First of all I like your games, so don't take the following the wrong way but what is up with your city placement? I would have placed Ghuanzou 1E so it could work the gold. At size two it could work the corn and the gold and that would be huge boost to your economy. Gold is the best resource after food if you ask me.
Then Xian? Why not 1E again to get the fish in the BFC? That city is so low on food it can almost never work the copper and/or the gold.
Nanjing is under direct cultural pressure from the maya's. I can understand you want the elephants but the banana's are out of your league. If you would have settled 1SE of the pigs you would have had pigs and horses in the inner ring, which would have been a lot better. Maybe even sneak in another city close to the gems/elephants. RIght now Nanjing has no way to grow, is unhealthy because of all the jungle and it will take a long time before you will even get the horses online. Is there something I am missing with the placement?

Anyway, love the games. Unrestricted leaders are fun. Keep it coming. Cheers.

Yeah, Xian is a (don't get me wrong, love the series) very poorly placed city. Why not 1E?

Good point.
I should realy think twice before I place my citys, oh well.
I doubt I could win this game, even with good city placements because:
1) First time runing a SE, even after reading up on it in these forums.
2) I have no production citys, but that's realy my fault .

Ty both. I won't improve (and thus write better stories) without your assistance!

Round 4 - Recovering an empire​

(Asoka and Patsy walk down the royal palace. Patsy is wearing a ravishing floral dress with matching heels. Asoka is wearing a red Cocktail dress)

Asoka Why have you disturbed me from my meditation to the Diety-who-cannot-be-named-for-dramatical-affect?!
Patsy We have built Courthouses across our nation sire! Our economy is recovering!
Asoka And what is this flimsy parchment you gave me?
Patsy It's money.


Asoka How is the war against the Sumerians?
Patsy It's over. We declared peace.
Asoka Did we?
Patsy That's why wear in these rediculouse cloths sir.
Asoka But how did we manage to sign a treaty? For I have prayed for years, asking the Diety to smite that unbeliever dead!
Patsy As we are Protective, we built numerous archers and walls. Then we hid behind our citys, while sending a counterforce to attack the SoD.
Asoka I say it again, why aren't you king?


(The empire was thriving, or for what stands for it while running a Specilist Economy.
A few trades where made to further our progress. Please note that Sury of Zululand is the current tech whore.)


Asoka (attempting to preach) THE LORD HAS GIVEN US A GIFT! WE CAN KNOW PRAISE HIM THROUGH OUR SACRED TEMPLES, MONASTARIES AND SUN-BATHING SPOTS! NOW, THE DIETY SHALL AID US!
Patsy We're accepting Organized Religion then?
Asoka ...............yes.........


Asoka What does our dear friend want?
Patsy He wants Polytheism, sir.
Asoka WHAT?!? HOW DARE HE DEMAND THAT FROM THE HAND OF THE DIETY!
Patsy He says there's gold in it for us.
Asoka Oh, how much?


(Several things happened at once, at this point. We discovered a very nice monoply tech. We sell said monoply tech. The diety Asoka was praying that a the Diety would rain death apon his enemys, while Patsy was plucking his toenails.)


Patsy Sir! Napolean has just declared war on Elizabeth!
Asoka Then we shall aid him! We shall rid this world from the buddist scum!
Patsy ....but...
Asoka What, O corn-husker?
Patsy It's just.... I was going to say that.... (begins crying)


(As Asoka was chasing down Patsy-the-wet-corn-husker-from-having-his-duties-as-advisor-made-obsolete-by-his-master, a new technology was made and several charts where made by Cherry-the-new-chart-lady.)


The save!

Metzi,

For starters, good work for (afaik) your first game on Prince (?), to be solidly #1 on the leaderboard is an encouraging indicator.

Although there's a lot of pointers, just some 'food for thought' ...

• You're building The Forbidden Palace in a city five tiles away from your capital. It's an expensive build for questionable retuns in this case, and it's in a city that is not benefiting from Judaism's Organised Religion (+25%).

• Shanghai is a really good spot for a Great Person Farm ... good work so far on this
  
  ... but it has so much more opportunity to grow beyond its current state. All of those 4 tiles should be supporting a ton more specialists. Let it build a Granary and an Aqueduct, and use Hereditary Rule to deal with happiness issues. Drop the Settler build, and do that elsewhere. It could accommodate 15 population while running 7 specialists (Farm your Wheat, take back the Floodplains from Beijing). Obviously you'll want to pop that Great Scientist, but I'd suggest you rework this city with growth in mind.

• Beijing is your science centre. Build a Taoist Monastery instead of (a now pretty obsolete unit in) a Swordsman. I know you've settled a Great General there ... if you must leverage your GG, at least build a Longbow. Consider spreading Buddhism there for another Monastery, and when Lakamha comes out of revolt it can work on a Confucian Missionary as one possibility for running up to Beijing.

• Spread Judaism for extra happiness and to leverage Organised Religion. Who knows, one day you might even run the Apostolic Palace? Spreading Judaism to Lakamha with a Jewish Missionary will give it culture so it need not work on a Monument for its border pop.

As I say, encouraging so far given you're trying a new level (I believe) with a fairly constraining variant in no cottages.

Ty Cam H. Great scolding as always.

I cannot build a taoist monastary as it clashes with our rules, I.E we cannot build other relgious buildings.

Metzi said:

Ty Cam H. Great scolding as always.

Click to expand...

Well, hopefully a few suggestions at a time might help. Even if you disagree, at least hopefully they're worth considering.

Metzi said:

I cannot build a taoist monastary as it clashes with our rules, I.E we cannot build other relgious buildings.

Click to expand...

I can't see that rule, but it's 'your party', so as you see fit. If so, obviously disregard suggestions on spreading religions other than Judaism into Beijing.
___

I'm assuming that you're going after Metal Casting for Machinery > Cho Ko Nus?

I'd also think about Literature for the National Epic (Shanghai). It'll take 6-9 turns depending on your commerce slider. Heroic Epic would be handy, but I can't see a 10XP / level 4 unit.

Best of luck with it.

You're not Protective.

@ CHEESE, Good point. But still, we survived.

@ Cam H, You are a great help. I won't change the rules, as it's a simple mistake to make. Also, I'm trying to spread judaism via Missionarys from my new Production City!
I think I've also got the hang on fog-busting.

Round 5 - Chinese UU = ​

Patsy Sir, why did you build a city there?
Asoka Because it's the best worst spot currently.
Patsy I see therapys working for you then. What's in the sandwiches?
Asoka Lemond curd.
Patsy Oh. (He's finally gone mad. Perfect!)


(Techs went Metal Casteing -> Machinary. I must say, the Chinese UU is most impressive in battle.)

Asoka How went the trading with our brothers?
Patsy Pretty sweet.
Asoka Beg pardon?
Patsy I mean...the diety truly shines upon us, as.... we have gained gold in the spirit of the Diety-who-will-eventually-controll-the-continent.


(We get Paper! Next step, Education! MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!)

Asoka Where'd that cute redhead go? She was just admiring my pike.
Patsy The Diety has ridden her from our presence. Her remains have been split, half being burnt in the Ziggurats of Uruak and the other will be feed to you, oh lawfull and holy lord!
Asoka Uhhh...okay!
Patsy Oh lord, Suryavarman was built an palace to honour the gods. We have voted for us to rule it.
Asoka Get to the point man, where losing moon-light.
Patsy The diety prohibits it.
Asoka So we lost then?
Patsy ...yes.
Asoka (Begins smoking the shreddings of the Red-haired Lady) Sooo...uhhh...anything else, man?
Patsy We settled a new city, in the name of the Diety! Long live.... the Diety!


Asoka Man, why did we declare on Jujucus?
Patsy We have been building a large army of Cho-ko-nu's, War elephants and catipults to rid the scum from our marvolous presence!
Asoka Allright! Have we won yet?
Patsy We did take one city, of lord. One Cho-ko-nu was unfortunetly found not-wearing the holy hand-grenade of Antioch, and was thus sacraficed.
Asoka So we lost a dude then?
Patsy

Metzi, do you hate sushi? Macau would have been a lot better 1SW. You get the fish, which is a lot more important then a desert tile. If there is a possibility to get a food resource in the BFC then it is almost always more important then other resource. With the fish Macau could work the horses and 4 or 5 plain cottages and still grow.

I love the expensive catapult crossbows in action btw. Get Julius.

There's also Fish to the east of Macau, so he's covered there.

It's still possible to settle an Iron-Fish city aound there too on the desert peninsula. Not a great city, but a possibility.