Abaddon's Weird News of the World!

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Ice cream man went bezerk on Turkey Day seeking vigilante justice:

http://www.tampabay.com/news/public...-thanksgiving-day-shootings-in-ruskin/1137710

RUSKIN — For 10 months, the ice cream man waited for justice.

Michael Edward Keetley, 39, had been shot in the chest, leg and hand for a mere $12.

The thugs who did it were never caught. So Keetley began asking questions of his own.

On Thanksgiving, deputies say, he was ready for revenge. They say he pulled up to a Ruskin home with a gun and fake cop gear, ordered seven men to lie down on a porch and opened fire from right to left, hitting six.

Two died. All were innocent, deputies say.

Those who had attacked Keetley in January remain at large.

But on Thursday, the ice cream man went to jail.

• • •

On Ocean Mist Court, where Hillsborough County sheriff's deputies say Keetley sprayed the bullets, people loved the sight of his purple ice cream truck, which sometimes brought free treats. After he was robbed, people gave him money for medical bills. Even the mother of two men he is accused of killing once thought of him as a good guy.

Others saw a different side. Their stories fill court files in petitions for repeat violence injunctions.

Last year, Susan Camp says she got a call from a man who identified himself as a Ruskin sheriff and said he'd gotten complaints about someone driving drunk in her ice cream truck.

She recognized the voice of Keetley, who was new to the business and had previously talked to her about ice cream sales. She told him she was onto him, and they laughed, she said.

But then he got serious. He told her that if she didn't keep her truck out of his territory, he would burn it. In court documents, she said he called her repeatedly and put 10 signs on the road that said, Don't buy ice cream from the blue truck. She sells drugs from her truck and is a very bad, nasty person.

She said two similar signs advertised his own purple truck.

Camp filed an injunction petition and got in touch with two neighborhood families named in repeat violence cases connected to Keetley. They met at a Village Inn to trade tales of foul-mouthed, front-yard threats.

Like the time they said Keetley called a woman a "filthy whore" over his ice cream truck speakers.

And the time, a few days later, that Keetley accused that woman's teenage son of threatening his dog with a baseball bat.

Camp's attorney, Ron Young, contacted Tel Tech Systems with a subpoena for any calls made by Keetley through their "SpoofCard" product, which allows callers to disguise their identities. The company returned a recording of a man telling the teenage neighbor he was with the State Attorney's Office and wanted his mother's number.

One year later came a third allegation that Keetley posed as an official to do harm. It came from Sheriff David Gee, after a double murder.

• • •

In January, as Keetley underwent surgeries to repair his gunshot wounds, his father told the St. Petersburg Times he might never use his hands again.

He recovered to an extent, but became obsessed with finding his shooter, deputies said.

He was looking for a Hispanic man named "Creeper," he told people who spoke to deputies. He offered a $1,500 reward if someone would bring the man to him.

He told one person he had police badges and uniforms and wanted to kill the people who shot him, deputies said. He told another he met someone in a Publix parking lot to buy a gun.

He approached 605 Ocean Mist Court after 2 a.m. Thanksgiving morning, as people played cards on a porch, deputies said.

He wore something that said "Sheriff" — a shirt or a bullet-proof vest — and asked for ID. He asked for "Creeper." The men said they didn't know him.

He ordered the seven men to the ground and opened fire.

Juan Guitron, 28, stood up to look for his brother before he died, his mother said. His brother, Sergio, 22, also died.

Wounded were Richard Cantu, 31, Daniel Beltran, 24, Ramon Galan, 29, and Gonzalo Guevara, 28. A seventh man survived unscathed, because one of the others fell over him like a shield.

Investigators later heard from the people they said Keetley spoke with about vigilante justice. Deputies watched him from afar and eventually stopped the van they said was at the scene.

Inside it, they say, they found a gun, which Keetley wasn't allowed to have after his neighbor troubles. They arrested him for violation of an injunction. He posted bail but wasn't free long.

Investigators executed a search warrant on his home and found a notebook on his kitchen counter. Inside, deputies said, he wrote the address where he thought he'd find "Creeper."

Outside, deputies said they found a target he used for shooting practice — a car, riddled with bullet holes. One of the .45 caliber rounds matched one found under a dead man, a Florida Department of Law Enforcement analyst concluded.

A deputy visited a hospital where Guevara nursed a punctured lung Wednesday and presented a photo lineup.

Guevara didn't hesitate when he saw the face he had seen as he laid on his stomach. He was "2,000 percent sure.''

"I will never forget that face."

• • •

The man Keetley sought actually calls himself "Creep." He lives a few houses from the murder scene and his real name is Omar Bailon. Gee doesn't know how or why Keetley became fixated on him. He, too, is innocent in the January robbery.

Bailon had been friends with the Guitron brothers since he was 5 or 6, friend Juan Hernandez said. They didn't give him up to the gunman. Bailon later learned he was why Keetley came.

"He was a mess," Hernandez said of his friend.

So are the other mourners, who have paused atop the porch to light candles to saints. Some want the death penalty. Others, life in prison.

"The truth is," said grieving mother Paz Quezada, "I would just like to have him in front of me. I'd like to be alone with him."

Times staff writers Danny Valentine, Justin George, Jared Leone and Stephanie Bolling and researcher John Martin and contributed to this report.
 
Guerrilla Trucks - Why rebels and insurgent groups the world over love the Toyota Hilux pickup as much as their AK-47s.

As the war in Afghanistan escalated several years ago, counterinsurgency expert David Kilcullen, a member of the team that designed the Iraq surge for Gen. David Petraeus, began to notice a new tattoo on some insurgent Afghan fighters. It wasn’t a Taliban tattoo. It wasn’t even Afghan. It was a Canadian maple leaf.

When a perplexed Kilcullen began to investigate, he says, he discovered that the incongruous flags were linked to what he says is one of the most important, and unnoticed, weapons of guerrilla war in Afghanistan and across the world: the lightweight, virtually indestructible Toyota Hilux truck.

“In Afghanistan in particular,” he says, “[the trucks are] incredibly well respected.” So well respected, in fact, that some enterprising fraudsters thought them worthy of ripping off. The imitations, Kilcullen says, had flooded the market, leaving disappointed fighters in their wake. But then “a shipment of high-quality [real] Hiluxes arrived, courtesy of the Canadian government,” he explains. “They had little Canadian flags on the back. Because they were the real deal, and because of how the Hilux is seen, over time, strangely, the Canadian flag has become a symbol of high quality across the country. Hence the tattoos.”

It’s not just rebels in Afghanistan that love the Hilux. “The Toyota Hilux is everywhere,” says Andrew Exum, a former Army Ranger and now a fellow of the Center for a New American Security. “It’s the vehicular equivalent of the AK-47. It’s ubiquitous to insurgent warfare. And actually, recently, also counterinsurgent warfare. It kicks the hell out of the Humvee.” Anecdotally, a scan of pictures from the last four decades of guerrilla and insurgent warfare around the world—the first iteration of the Hilux appeared in the late ’60s—reveals the Toyota’s wide-ranging influence. Somali pirates bristling with guns hang out of them on the streets of Mogadishu. The New York Times has reported that the Hilux is the pirates’ “ride of choice.” A ragtag bunch of 20 or so Sudanese fighters raise their arms aloft in the back of a Hilux in 2004. Pakistani militants drive through a crowd, guns high, in 2000. It goes on. Nicaragua, Ethiopia, Rwanda, Liberia, the Democratic Republic of the Congo, Lebanon, Yemen, Iraq—U.S. Special Forces even drive Toyota Tacomas (the chunkier, U.S. version of the Hilux) on some of their deployments. (Click here for a gallery of Toyota trucks in conflict-torn regions.)

While Taliban leader Mullah Omar reportedly likes to roll in a Chevy Suburban and Osama Bin Laden is said to have preferred the Hilux’s bigger brother, the Landcruiser, when he was able to move freely, most Al Qaeda lieutenants drive Hiluxes, according to a New York Times report from the early 2000s. Even today, says Kilcullen, “It’s a bit of a sign you’re dealing with Al Qaeda when you come across them in Pakistan. They use the twin-cab version, because you can carry people and stuff in the back, and also mount a heavy weapon in the pickup.”

The truck even has a war named after it: the so-called “Toyota War” between Libya and Chad in the 1980s was dominated by fighters using the light, mobile Hilux. Indeed, Africa, says Kilcullen, is where the truck got its nickname as a fighting vehicle, “the technical.” “When [nongovernmental organizations] and the U.N. first went into Somalia,” he says, referring to a period in the 1990s, “they were not able to bring their own guards. So they got so-called ‘technical assistance grants’ to hire guards and drivers on the ground. Over time, a ‘technical’ came to mean a vehicle owned by a guard company, and then eventually to mean a Hilux with a heavy weapon mounted on the back.”

The Toyota is such a widespread and powerful weapon for insurgents, says Dr. Alastair Finlan, who specializes in strategic studies at Britain’s Aberystwyth University, because it acts as a “force multiplier.” It is “fast, maneuverable, and packs a big punch [when it’s mounted with] a 50-caliber [machine gun] that easily defeats body armor on soldiers and penetrates lightly armored vehicles as well.” It is particularly dangerous, he adds, against lightly armed special-forces operatives.

An experiment conducted by British TV show Top Gear in 2006 offers one explanation. The show’s producers bought an 18-year-old Hilux diesel with 190,000 miles on the odometer for $1,500. They then crashed it into a tree, submerged it in the ocean for five hours, dropped it from about 10 feet, tried to crush it under an RV, drove it through a portable building, hit it with a wrecking ball, and set it on fire. Finally they placed it on top of a 240-foot tower block that was then destroyed in a controlled demolition. When they dug it out of the rubble, all it took to get it running again was hammers, wrenches, and WD-40. They didn’t even need spare parts.

The Hilux was originally designed, says Kevin Hunter, president of Toyota’s design division in California, as “a lightweight truck with big tires on big wheels. It was meant as a recreational truck, a truck people could have fun with. They also have a really high ground clearance, which means they’re ideal for off-road work.”

They have always been built, says Hunter, as “body-on-frame” trucks: “There’s a rigid steel frame construction, and the body is fitted on top of that. That’s much stronger that most modern cars, where the body and frame are one. I would describe them as bulletproof. We get people who run them for years. There are 200,000 or 300,000 miles on them and they’re still going.” But Hunter admits he doesn’t know why Hiluxes are so popular with guerrilla forces; many other manufacturers’ trucks, he says, are also body-on-frame.

Kilcullen, who has faced forces using the Hilux in Afghanistan, Pakistan, and Iraq, says the vehicle’s longevity is a factor, as is the high ground clearance. “They cover the ground incredibly well,” he says. They are often used by insurgent forces as “a modern version of light cavalry. They move weapons into positions to fire, and can also shift people around very quickly, with a quick dismount. The Hilux is perfectly designed for that. I’ve seen 20 people and a mounted weapon on one.”

A former British special forces soldier, who asked not to be identified because he still consults on active operations, says he too has faced the Hilux, which he refers to as “the technical,” in both Iraq and Afghanistan. “I’d say the appeal is pretty simple,” he says. “You can’t underestimate the value of having a vehicle that is fast, will never break down, and is strong enough to mount a heavy weapon in the back.”

Exum, who has seen the Hilux in action across the Middle East, says the Toyota’s status is self-perpetuating. “Because everyone uses them, there are parts easily available, and mechanics everywhere know how to fix them. That kind of feeds on itself,” he says.

The New York Times piece on Mullah Omar’s car also noted that during Taliban rule in Afghanistan, the Hilux and its larger sibling the Landcruiser “provided ideal platforms for intimidation and enforcement.” The Taliban rode around “ready to leap down and beat women for showing a glimpse of ankle or to lock a man in a shipping container for three weeks until his beard grew to the approved length. Or, most dismal, to drag an accused adulterer or blasphemer to the soccer stadium for execution.”

Some of the Canadian-flagged Hiluxes, says Kilcullen, have almost certainly ended up in Taliban hands this time around. Here’s hoping that history doesn’t drive back around in a Toyota.

Top Gear episode. The controlled demolition survival part is near the end.
 
Iraqi killed and buried his teenage daughter after learning she planned to be an Al Qaida suicide bomber.

http://af.reuters.com/article/worldNews/idAFTRE6BN1R520101224?pageNumber=2&virtualBrandChannel=0

BAGHDAD (Reuters) - An Iraqi man killed and buried his teenaged daughter after learning she had intended to become a suicide bomber for al Qaeda, a security official said on Friday.

Iraqi security forces raided the man's house in Mandili, 100 km (60 miles) northeast of Baghdad, to search for Shahla Najim al-Anbaky after receiving information that she had ties to the Sunni Islamist militant group.

They arrested her father, Najim Abd al-Anbaky, on Thursday when he confessed he had killed his daughter and buried her body near his house, said Major Ghalib al-Jubouri, a police spokesman in Diyala province.

"He confessed he killed her when he learned she worked for al Qaeda and she wanted to blow herself up," Jubouri said.

The man guided security forces to his daughter's grave, he said.

Diyala, a mainly Sunni Arab province with significant Shi'ite and Kurdish populations, has seen some of the worst violence since the U.S.-led invasion in 2003.

In a separate incident, suspected al Qaeda militants bombed the home of a Shi'ite family in a town south of Baghdad on Friday, killing five people.

Three bombs were planted overnight at the home of Mohammed al-Karrafi, a follower of anti-American Shi'ite cleric Moqtada al-Sadr, in Haswa, a religiously mixed town about 50 km (30 miles) south of the Iraqi capital, police said. Continued...

"After midnight, two bombs completely destroyed the house of the Sadrist, Mohammed al-Karrafi, killing five people and wounding four others," said Major General Fadhil Razaq, the chief of police in Babil province. "All the casualties are from the same family."

The blasts killed Karrafi, his wife, his two sons and a nephew. Two of Karrafi's brothers and their wives were wounded in the explosions.

Razaq said a third bomb was detonated when security forces reached the scene but no one was hurt.

"We accuse al Qaeda. Al Qaeda is trying to take Iraq back to sectarian conflict by targeting Shi'ite figures," Razaq add.

Overall violence has fallen in the last two years as the sectarian bloodshed that followed the 2003 U.S.-led invasion fades, but bombings and attacks still occur daily.
 
Trowbridge driver lost for three days

Auntie said:
A Wiltshire grandfather spent three days trying to find his way home from Gatwick Airport after becoming disorientated in snowy conditions.

Moroccan-born Mohammed Bellazrak's family reported him missing after he failed to return to Trowbridge after dropping his wife off for a flight.

Police in Oxfordshire eventually flagged down the 72-year-old after his car triggered a camera in Oxford.

They found he had spent from 23 - 25 December driving, trying to get back.

Analysis from number-plate recognition systems showed he had driven around various towns in Buckinghamshire, Berkshire and Oxfordshire and on the M4.

Mr Bellazrak had no mobile phone with him, and he told newspaper reporters that his sat-nav was not working.

Thames Valley Police took him to Oxford police station after he was stopped in Abingdon Road in the city at 2pm on Christmas Day, and after a rest, relatives took him home. He was unharmed by the ordeal.

A police spokesman told the BBC it was "nice the story had a happy ending".

WTF?
 
Analysis from number-plate recognition systems showed he had driven around various towns in Buckinghamshire, Berkshire and Oxfordshire and on the M4.
Good thing Britain has its own version of Big Brother to keep us all safe from lost terrorists.
 
Practical joke gone awry?

Navy officer jumps to death after drug arrest

MANILA, Philippines — A U.S. Navy officer jumped to his death at Manila's airport after he was arrested with what was thought to be cocaine, Philippine officials said Tuesday, but tests later showed the white powder wasn't an illegal drug.

Lt. Cmdr. Scintar Buenviaje Mejia died of head injuries after jumping from a second-floor staircase Monday while a security guard escorted him to the bathroom, aviation police chief Pedro Desuasido said.

Mejia had asked to use a nearby bathroom, but it was occupied, the Manila Standard Today reported. A guard at the aviation security facility instead took him to the parking lot to releive himself, the report said, where — still handcuffed — he broke away and ran to the stairway, the report said.

The 35-year-old Mejia, a U.S. citizen of Filipino descent, was arrested a day earlier at an airport X-ray machine after security officials found a plastic packet containing what was suspected to be cocaine in his bag, Desuasido said. He was about to board a flight to Los Angeles.

Desuasido said Mejia shouted and threw the packet at security officials. He denied the packet was his and claimed he was set up.

Wossie Mazengia, a U.S. Embassy spokeswoman, said American officials were aware of what happened to Mejia. She said Philippine National Police officials were investigating.
 
There's a police incar video at the website:

Driver crashes twice after being stopped for suspected DUI

LAGUNA BEACH – A man suspected of driving while intoxicated crashed his car – twice – after he was pulled over by a police officer, authorities said.
The Huntington Beach man was pulled over for a suspected traffic violation and DUI, but he crashed into the officer's patrol car as he tried to park in the lot of a nearby gas station, said Sgt. George Ramos of the Laguna Beach Police Department.

The driver, Christian Aparicio, was pulled over for a suspected traffic violation and DUI, but he crashed into the officer's patrol car as he tried to park in the lot of a nearby gas station, said Sgt. George Ramos of the Laguna Beach Police Department.

Officer Tony White spotted the vehicle near Broadway Street and South Coast Highway Saturday at about 11:30 p.m., Ramos said.

The man, who was accompanied by a woman, drove into the parking lot of a gas station as he was pulled over. White stopped behind the vehicle and walked over to driver's side door.

The driver was identified as Christian Aparicio, said Sgt. Louise Callus.

Aparicio, 42, was getting out of the car, but had apparently left the car in reverse before climbing out, Ramos said.

The car backed into the officer's patrol car, crashing into the grill.

Aparicio jumped back into the car to stop it, then apparently put it into drive.

The car sped rapidly forward and crashed into a pole directly in front of it. The force of the crash lifted the rear wheels of the car about a foot into the air, Ramos said.
"He put it into drive, and he just punches (the gas) and it hits the pole," Ramos said.
Aparicio's passenger was still inside the car.

"Fortunately no one got hurt," Ramos said.

The vehicle also hit a water and air dispenser at the gas station, causing the water line to rupture, Callus said. Water department officials were called to shut off the water.

Aparicio was taken into custody on suspicion of a DUI crash, Ramos said. He was released Sunday. The incident remains under investigation.
 
Relatively tiny turboprop plane causes widespread panic in DC:

Jets scramble and Capitol emptied after pilot error

WASHINGTON — A passenger plane briefly lost radio contact with air traffic controllers when the pilot turned to the wrong frequency as he approached Washington, leading to the scrambling of fighter jets and the evacuation of the U.S. Capitol, federal officials said Saturday.

Federal Aviation Administration spokesman Jim Peters said the agency is reviewing the "pilot readback error." The loss of radio contact as the plane approached the nation's capital also led officials to evacuate all House and Senate office buildings.

Piedmont Airlines flight 4352 from Hilton Head, S.C., was on course for Ronald Reagan Washington National Airport when it lost radio contact with air traffic controllers at a regional radar facility in Virginia for about 15 minutes, FAA officials said. The facility is responsible for handling the plane almost until the landing, when Reagan National takes over.

F-16 fighter jets were scrambled from Andrews Air Force Base, but the airliner was able to re-establish radio contact and it landed at Reagan National, said Stacey Knott, a spokeswoman for the North American Aerospace Defense Command. It was unclear how contact was re-established. The FAA and U.S. Secret Service interviewed the pilot when the plane was on the ground.

The evacuation order was issued around 1:30 p.m. and was called off about a half-hour later, when the plane landed. Few people were at the Capitol complex on Saturday as Congress is out of session, and the Capitol Visitors Center was closed because of the New Year's holiday. The Secret Service moved to a higher security condition during the incident, but did not evacuate the White House, according to agency spokesman Max Milien.

Piedmont, based in Salisbury, Md., is a wholly owned subsidiary of US Airways. US Airways spokeswoman Tina Swail said the airline was working with local authorities to investigate the incident. The number of passengers on board wasn't immediately known. The company's website says it operates 44 de Havilland DHC-8 turboprop aircraft.

Comparable plane:

 
Of all ships this had to happen on, it happened on the Enterprise?!

Star Trek nerds will have a field day with this.

Maybe. :p

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20110102/ap_on_re_us/us_lewd_navy_video
NORFOLK, Va. – A top officer aboard a nuclear-powered aircraft carrier broadcast to his crew a series of profanity-laced comedy sketches in which he uses gay slurs, mimics masturbation and opens the shower curtain on women pretending to bathe together, a newspaper reported.

The Virginian-Pilot reported in its Sunday editions that Capt. Owen Honors appeared in the videos in 2006 and 2007 while he was the USS Enterprise's second-ranking officer, and showed them across the ship on closed-circuit television. He took over as the ship's commander in May.

The Navy said it plans to investigate the videos, which it called "clearly inappropriate."

"The videos were intended to be humorous skits focusing the crew's attention on specific issues such as port visits, traffic safety, water conservation, ship cleanliness, etc.," the Navy said in a statement to the newspaper.

Navy Cmdr. Chris Sims said in a statement sent to The Associated Press that the videos "were not acceptable then and are not acceptable in today's Navy."

A phone listing for Honors was not immediately available. He is a 1983 alumnus of the U.S. Naval Academy and was a naval aviator before holding command. He attended the U.S. Naval Fighter Weapons School, also known as Top Gun.

Commanding officers and enlisted chiefs "are charged to lead by example and are held accountable for setting the proper tone and upholding the standards of honor, courage and commitment that we expect Sailors to exemplify," Sims said in the statement.

In a video obtained by the newspaper and posted on its website, Honors addresses the camera and introduces a series of several lewd video clips, which he acknowledges have drawn complaints.

"As usual, the admiral and the captain have no idea about the contents of the video or movie this evening, and they should not be held accountable in any judicial setting," Honors says on the video. "Over the years I've gotten several complaints about inappropriate material during these videos, never to me personally but, gutlessly, through other channels."

During this introduction, he also uses a derogatory term for gays.

Next comes a sequence of what appear to be outtakes in which Honors and others curse. Honors observes that comedians who performed on the ship always got laughs when they used "the f-bomb." After that, Honors and others are shown making hand motions that mimic masturbation.

Honors segues to the next segment by saying, "Finally let's get to my favorite topic ... chicks in the shower." Next are shown clips of pairs of women and a pair of men pretending to shower together. No nudity is shown, but the men's and women's bare shoulders imply they are nude.

It's not immediately clear where the ship was located when the videos were produced. The Enterprise served a six-month deployment in support of the war in Iraq in 2006 and another six-month deployment to the Persian Gulf in 2007.

Commissioned in 1961, it's the world's first nuclear-powered aircraft carrier. It is scheduled to sail two more deployments before it is decommissioned in 2013. It can carry a crew of more than 5,800.
 
Has there ever been an openly gay Star Trek character?

"Over the years I've gotten several complaints about inappropriate material during these videos, never to me personally but, gutlessly, through other channels."
I love it when the homophobes call others "gutless" merely for appropriately complaining about their overt bigotry.
 
Punitive Articles of the UCMJ
Article 133—Conduct unbecoming an officer and gentleman

“Any commissioned officer, cadet, or midshipman who is convicted of conduct unbecoming an officer and a gentleman shall be punished as a court-martial may direct.”

I think indecency and indecorum qualify, but Mobboss would know better (IIRC he's JAG), so would Patroklos (officer in the Navy)
 
I know this is over a year old, but I just stumbled on it and found it too lolworthy not to share:

SA pigeon 'faster than broadband'
Broadband promised to unite the world with super-fast data delivery - but in South Africa it seems the web is still no faster than a humble pigeon.

A Durban IT company pitted an 11-month-old bird armed with a 4GB memory stick against the ADSL service from the country's biggest web firm, Telkom.

Winston the pigeon took two hours to carry the data 60 miles - in the same time the ADSL had sent 4% of the data.

Telkom said it was not responsible for the firm's slow internet speeds.

The idea for the race came when a member of staff at Unlimited IT complained about the speed of data transmission on ADSL.

He said it would be faster by carrier pigeon.

"We renown ourselves on being innovative, so we decided to test that statement," Unlimited's Kevin Rolfe told the Beeld newspaper.

'No cats allowed'

Winston took off from Unlimited IT's call centre in the town of Howick to deliver the memory stick to the firm's office in Durban.

According to Winston's website there were strict rules in place to ensure he had no unfair advantage. They included "no cats allowed" and "birdseed must not have any performance-enhancing seeds within".

The firm said Winston took one hour and eight minutes to fly between the offices, and the data took another hour to upload on to their system.

Mr Rolfe said the ADSL transmission of the same data size was about 4% complete in the same time.
Hundreds of South Africans followed the race on social networking sites Facebook and Twitter.

"Winston is over the moon," Mr Rolfe said.

"He is happy to be back at the office and is now just chilling with his friends."

Meanwhile Telkom said it could not be blamed for slow broadband services at the Durban-based company.

"Several recommendations have, in the past, been made to the customer but none of these have, to date, been accepted," Telkom's Troy Hector told South Africa's Sapa news agency in an e-mail.

South Africa is one of the countries hoping to benefit from three new fibre optic cables being laid around the African continent to improve internet connections.
 
So lost. So very, very lost.



The story:
Two Swedes were out ice skating when the waves from a boat passing far away caused the ice to break up. They called the Emergency Service and explained the situation and suggested they could jump from ice flake to ice flake until they reached land. The Emergency Service suggested that was a stupid idea and sent a helicopter. So a happy ending at the end.

Must have been quite an experience to find themselves trapped on an ice flake...
 
Weird or just gross?

Most expensive flat in London bought by bored man surfing net at weekend.

"the £135million penthouse was bought by someone making a casual enquiry via the internet on a weekend afternoon. That's right. Such folk exist, apparently. There you are, casting around on Google because you're bored and a few clicks later you're on your way to spending north of £100million. They won't say who he is (it is a male), but "he's not an Arab, not a Russian"'

Spoiler :
Today, at One Hyde Park, 300 guests sat down to lunch cooked by Heston Blumenthal and Daniel Boulud. For Nick and his brother Christian, developers of the luxury apartment block next to the Mandarin Oriental, there was triumph and relief - finally their project is ready for launch.

For the past few years, the scheme has dominated this corner of Knightsbridge - in more ways than one. The traffic has been horrendous as the imposing concrete and glass structure has taken shape, although the Candys insist the jams and delays are not of their making - Transport for London has been slow to make its own agreed changes to the busy junction.

And while this lunchtime's official opening should mark the end, the bad news for frustrated bus and other road users is there's still to be no relief. Congestion will continue to be hellish for at least another year as work (nothing to do with the Candys) begins on the site of the former Normandie Hotel nearby - plans have been approved for a 76-bedroom hotel, restaurant, retail space and five residential flats on no less than six basement levels, ground floor and nine upper floors.

By the time that is completed, the brothers and their backers hope all their units in One Hyde Park will have been sold. Designed by Richard Rogers, they are intended as the last word in luxury. Certainly, they retail at prices unheard of in London or virtually anywhere in the world - £6,000 a square foot, which means a four-bed apartment reaching from the front of the building to the back overlooking Hyde Park costs just short of £60million.

The top penthouse has gone for £135million. In all, the Candys say they have sold half the 86 units.

What do you get for that sort of money? Bomb blast-protected windows, fortress-type security, computerised lighting and audio, use of a state-of-the-art gym complete with private exercise and treatment rooms and 21m "ozone" swimming pool, saunas, steam rooms, squash court, golf simulator, "virtual" games room, wine cellars, business suite and meeting rooms, entertainment rooms, Park Library, underground car park, car cleaning and valet parking ... the list of accoutrements and gadgetry goes on and on. There are separate entrances for staff and room service from the restaurants of stellar chefs Blumenthal and Boulud at the Mandarin Oriental should they so desire (there's a connecting tunnel for the 60 hotel staff who will service the apartments). Plus "Candy & Candy" interiors if they want them, with oodles of marble and porcelain and silk and leather wall coverings.

But buying an apartment in One Hyde Park, the brothers argue, is about much more than acquiring a property in which to live and entertain and rest your head for the night. They say it's also to do with acquiring the most prestigious address in the world. Their reasoning is that London is the planet's pre-eminent financial centre and a tax haven for many rich foreigners. Its best residential location, they maintain, is at the top of Sloane Street, the city's most fashionable shopping street, bang opposite Harvey Nicks and directly adjacent to Hyde Park. And that spot has been renamed by them One Hyde Park.

To reinforce the message of international, top-of-the-market appeal, the ground floor commercial spaces at One Hyde Park have been sold to Rolex watches, McLaren performance cars and Abu Dhabi Islamic Bank.

We may baulk at the cost but in truth they are not really catering for us. They are aiming One Hyde Park at the sort of jet-setters who already have bases in New York, Singapore, Dubai, wherever - and need somewhere central in London.

These are purchasers, too, who have not suffered much in the credit crunch, if at all, who have money to burn and can afford to buy an apartment running into tens of millions, seemingly with their loose change.

As if to emphasise that, they say the £135million penthouse was bought by someone making a casual enquiry via the internet on a weekend afternoon. That's right. Such folk exist, apparently. There you are, casting around on Google because you're bored and a few clicks later you're on your way to spending north of £100million. They won't say who he is (it is a male), but "he's not an Arab, not a Russian".
 
Birds wouldn't be able to fly were they not all lightweights.
 
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