It's not a gun, it's a burritto

ybbor · Apr 29, 2005

http://story.news.yahoo.com/news?tmpl=story&cid=816&e=2&u=/ap/20050429/ap_on_fe_st/burrito_lockdown

CLOVIS, N.M. - A call about a possible weapon at a middle school prompted police to put armed officers on rooftops, close nearby streets and lock down the school. All over a giant burrito.

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Someone called authorities Thursday after seeing a boy carrying something long and wrapped into Marshall Junior High.

The drama ended two hours later when the suspicious item was identified as a 30-inch burrito filled with steak, guacamole, lettuce, salsa and jalapenos and wrapped inside tin foil and a white T-shirt.

"I didn't know whether to laugh or cry," school Principal Diana Russell said.

State police, Clovis police and the Curry County Sheriff's Department arrived at the school shortly after 8:30 a.m. They searched the premises and determined there was no immediate danger.

In the meantime, more than 30 parents, alerted by a radio report, descended on the school. Visibly shaken, they gathered around in a semi-circle, straining their necks, awaiting news.

"There needs to be security before the kids walk through the door," said Heather Black, whose son attends the school.

After the lockdown was lifted but before the burrito was identified as the culprit, parents pulled 75 students out of school, Russell said.

Russell said the mystery was solved after she brought everyone in the school together in the auditorium to explain what was going on.

"The kid was sitting there as I'm describing this (report of a student with a suspicious package) and he's thinking, 'Oh, my gosh, they're talking about my burrito.'"

Afterward, eighth-grader Michael Morrissey approached her.

"He said, 'I think I'm the person they saw,'" Russell said.

The burrito was part of Morrissey's extra-credit assignment to create commercial advertising for a product.

"We had to make up a product and it could have been anything. I made up a restaurant that specialized in oddly large burritos," Morrissey said.

After students heard the description of what police were looking for, he and his friends began to make the connection. He then took the burrito to the office.

"The police saw it and everyone just started laughing. It was a laughter of relief," Morrissey said.

"Oh, and I have a new nickname now. It's Burrito Boy."

Solomwi · Apr 29, 2005

"There needs to be security before the kids walk through the door," said Heather Black, whose son attends the school.

She needs a good dose of the cattle prod. They locked the place down for a freaking burrito, you twit. What more do you want?

Oh, all those parents that pulled their kids out of school need to line up right behind Mrs. Black for their jolt, too.

The Omega · Apr 29, 2005

Hey, those burritoes can be dangerous, ja know. Someone killed 10 people sith a superburrito at my school, once.

Yuri2356 · Apr 29, 2005

Ah yes, the great Burrito massacre of '94....

Tomoyo · Apr 29, 2005

If you eat a burrito, under certain circumstances, your stomach will explode, putting Hydrochloric acid on every one...

Lord Draegon · Apr 29, 2005

Huh i remember something like that happening. It was really painful with the acid allover me. But it did kind of look like a gun and so the fear was justified, but still :lol:

Babbler · Apr 30, 2005

Didn't you know that burrittos are now the terrorist's choice of weapon?

YNCS · Apr 30, 2005

If you ate a 30 inch burrito, you'd have gas. That should qualify as a Weapon of Mass Destruction.

Yuri2356 · Apr 30, 2005

"I will not allow Mexico to threaten our freedom with Burritos of Mass Destruction!"

The Person · Apr 30, 2005

Nothing's impossible in the USA. Soon they'll have a Burrito Shield installed.

Perfection · Apr 30, 2005

I wanna see a picture of that burrito. I mean that thing is friggin' huge!

Chieftess · Apr 30, 2005

"Burrito Boy"... I guess he got his extra credit for the day...

*insert commercial with a bad punch line here*

ybbor · Apr 30, 2005

The Person said:
Nothing's impossible in the USA. Soon they'll have a Burrito Shield installed.

we must build an outrageously costly buritto defense system that can prevent any rouge taco shop in the axis-of-beans from attemtping to burritoficate great Amerricans.

thank you, and may God bless everything but burrittos

Hotpoint · Apr 30, 2005

ybbor said:
we must build an outrageously costly buritto defense system that can prevent any rouge taco shop in the axis-of-beans from attemtping to burritoficate great Amerricans.

thank you, and may God bless everything but burrittos

I hear that the CIA suspects there to have been high level talks with the Pretzel Liberation Organisation. President Bush has been rushed to his bunker.

FriendlyFire · Apr 30, 2005

Pretzel Liberation Organisation.

Dammit hasnt the President learnt anything from the last Attempt on hs Life.
Those Pretzels are dangerous.

The Person · May 1, 2005

In other words, all pretzels going to the USA should have a thorough background check before allowed to cross the border. One week later nobody knows why the price of pretzels has risen to its current level.

LLXerxes · May 1, 2005

"Get down on the ground *******! We've got you surrounded!"
"Put the weapon DOWN and slide it across the floor"
*burrito sliding across the floor sound*
"Mmm, Spicy chicken, my favorite!"

Taco Bell, spice up the night

Friggin idiots.

Nobody · May 1, 2005

im going to get a french stick and put a big knife in it and then take it to school and get Stabby

TrailblazingScot · May 28, 2005

Sounds like the cops were just hungry...

Actually, reading the article again:

"He said, 'I think I'm the person they saw,'" Russell said.

The burrito was part of Morrissey's extra-credit assignment to create commercial advertising for a product.

I think the unnamed person making the phonecall to the authorities can be named. A bit too suspicious, that happening when he is LOOKing to advertise a product for extra-credit, don't cha think?

It's not a gun, it's a burritto

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