in my opinion, there is no level where i say to myself "this guy is new". what i want to see is "this guy is having fun". i've seen folks playing at deity and not having fun; i don't think "ooooh aaaah what a skilled player", i think "why play a game if it frustrates you that much?

" so for me, if you hate losing, then spend what limited time you have at a level where you won't always lose, but that does provide some challenge as defined as "i'm not bored to tears". if the next difficulty level is too big a jump, maybe play the current level but give yourself restrictions so that you get a challenge for a while and aren't bored, and maybe you work up the confidence to later go up the level if that's a goal you want to work toward.
i have my own scoring system that i put far more value on than i do firaxis's "official" in game one. did i have fun, giggle, and/or pull off something new for the first time? did i surprise myself doing stuff i didn't think i could do, or recovering from a mistake? did i get revenge on whoever killed me most recently? that sort of thing. but when i lose, i do feel better when the game considers me a good loser and gives me a ranking of Ethelred the Unready (3rd from bottom) and not Dan Quayle (the very bottom, you haven't yet had that honor). i'm a permanoob, i admit it. it makes me giggle and it lets me get away with a lot of crazy stuff

. i have a blast playing; to me that's the point.
being a wuss isn't bad. spending what limited time you have playing a game that constantly makes you want to tear out your hair in frustration, that (in my opinion) is "ummm, what are you thinking?"
but, my #1 rule above anything else is, play in a way that's fun for you, don't let what anybody else thinks interfere with that. so if some folks do get a kick out of constant hair-tearing-out, then they should go for it. me questioning their sanity is certainly no reason to stop; folks question mine just about every time i speak or type, and i clearly haven't stopped doing that.
mostly joking disclaimer: i'm a girl. i honestly don't know how much of that attitude is a result of that. the stereotype is that guys are more competitive about stuff like this.
