Below is an interview between MM and The God Emperor Ramius Lim (GERL) of the Holy Chinese Empire. Its an epic game on Huge map, continental map, 16 civs and monarch level. (Just in case u guys wonder there are 2 chinese races, HCE and The Reds)
MM: Let me congratulate you, sir, for conquering the Roman Empire.
GERL: Thank you. It's nothing actually.
MM: No sir, it was very impressive indeed. The Carthage, The Celts, The Korean, The Arab and now India, France, Scandinavia, Persia and Rome. It was nothing short of spectacular.
GERL: Oh, its not all my work actually, i got to thank my family for their support and of course all of you men out there so that we can unite this continent.
MM: Must you eliminate all the races just so to unite the continent ?
GERL: Well, lets say your country is going strong and some low cultured civilisation is blocking your advancement so you really have to remove them. Ahem .
MM: Why can't we all just live together in harmony ? Isn't there enough land for all of us?
GERL: SEX !!!
MM: Pardon me sir ?
GERL: Errrrr..., nothing. Why you asked ?
GERL: I was saying Its not fair that they got the better land than us. You know, we HCE are much more " advance", so we do really need more space for our cattle ranch, Chariot racing, 3500 sqf houses with garden and gigantic fooball field.
MM: Thought i heard something, must be my bad. Sorry sir.
MM: So, we just needed more space ? Yeah ?
GERL: Thats right.
MM: But why are we still enslaving their people ? Making them work in our fields and construct roads ?
GERL: Thats because our own people got better things to do. Like arts, researching, training for war and pondering on how to better our lives. For all of us, even those workers .
MM: Dont they have their rights too ? They are human just like you and me, you know.
GERL: They DO have their right, you know~. They have the power to vote ever since we became a Democracy.
MM: Yes, they sure can, but provided they must first pass a literacy test or at least have a grandfather and father who had passed the test before.
GERL: Same rules applied to all the citizen of HCE. All citizen must at least reach a certain literacy standard before they can vote, so we know that they will make the "right" choice.
MM: But isn't it the spirit of "Universal Suffrage" that everyone can vote regardless of age, race, language, sex, religion or social standard ?
GERL: Errr.. well, we called it "Universal Suffrage" only because it sounds better and hey, everyone in the world call it "Universal", see the English and Egyptian. Its actually "Women Suffrage", we builded it so that all the women will STF* when all the men go to war.
MM: I get it, so its acutally a publicity stunt, i get it.
GERL: Glad you do.
MM: So, lets move on to world politics shall we ?
GERL: Sure, shoot.
MM: What do you think of the war between British, China, Egypt and Zulu against the Ottoman ?
GERL: They're all suckers.
MM: Why would you say that ?
GERL: You know, its was actually my idea for Britain to attack the Ottoman?
MM: Wow ! How did you do that ?
GERL: It was easy actually. I signed a Alliance against the Ottoman with the British. I also supply some "wine" to them.
But actaully they had asked for some "Saltpeter".
MM: So u brided the British with "Wine" ? Why dont you give them "Saltpeter" so that they can build better units like Musketmen ?
GERL: Nah, i heard the British actually fought better when you give them Booze and Beer. Trust me, I saw" Waterloo".
MM: And the Chinese , Egyptian and Zulu ?
GERL: Lets start with the Zulu.
MM: Im listening.
GERL: As you know the Zulu are a sorry bunch. They lost their country since ancient time and been wandering the world just to find a place to live. But nooo... they wanted more. They started to outperform the local crowd. Out doing them in every way.
MM: That was impressive.
GERL: If only things are so easy. You see, the local crowd don't like it. And so they started to have rivalry between the races. This is bad for the local authority. The local pressured them to do something about it. Hey, it wasnt our fault when some for you guys are born losers. Of course this doesnt happened in the HCE.
MM: Thats because you kept them out.
GERL: Thereofore, we decided to gave them a place to live. So they can go play with themselve over there.
MM: And how you got them into the war ?
GERL: I was figuring, if i don't get the Zulu on our side, the Ottoman will. So it better that we do it first. This also apply to the Egyptian.
MM: K, i get it, Its either you are with US or against US.
GERL: Hey, i like that. Its either you're with US or against US. Its either you're... Its either...
MM: And the Chinese ?
GERL: Oh, you mean the Reds ?
MM: Yes.
GERL: Those Son of a *****
MM: Why you say that?
GERL: I wouldnt trust those Commuist even with a slingshot let alone a gun.
MM: But then why you get them, thought you hate them.
GERL: Thats because the British and Zulu couldnt get the job done. They were being slapped left right by the Ottoman.
MM: Not surprise from the second superpower.
GERL: So i have to lower my voice and get the Chinese to join the war. So embrassing.
MM: Also this time, you have to trade in "Saltpeter" and some technology.
GERL: SEX !!!
MM: Hey you did it again !! I swear i heard that !!
GERL: Heard what ?
MM: You shouted "Sex" !!
GERL: No I didn't.
MM: Yes you did, i heard that.
GERL: Oh i was saying Saxaphone, you know the one before me like to play that.
MM: Errr......
GERL: Ok, lets get back to the interview.
MM: Errrr.. sure
GERL: I was saying damn those Reds. I actually wanted to isolate them before they can rise up and challenge the ORIGINAL HCE. But noooo. I was forced to make peace with them. Else the Ottoman would have win the war.
MM: So you managed to get all these countries to fight for us without fighting the ear ourselves, Its just like a internet proxy. Yeah, its the proxy war.
GERL: Oh yes, I got a great idea, this should be called a proxy war. Man, i'm so smart.
MM: Yeah~~
MM: So why do you wanted this war initially?
GERL: Well, at first the Ottoman, The Reds and The British are living peacefully together and exchanging their research and technology between themselves. leaving us out of the loop. I was so damn pissed, that wasn't fair ! They should trade with us, you know, US !!! So i set up some international bodies to monitor the trading between the nation, making sure that they have to abide the trading rules and trade fairly.
MM: But we impose sanction and levy on their products?
GERL: Thats because they dont trade fairly !! Especially the damned Reds. They sell their products way under value than the ones that we produced and undercut us at the world market. They can afford to pay low wages to their people and exploit their own people.
MM: Maybe its because they have a lower standard of living ?
GERL: Bull**** , everyone deserved a Three horse chariot and 3500sqf house.
MM: Im sure they all do.
GERL: But too bad, the trade bodies are not doing their jobs and now these countries are turning it against US ! You know, US ! We invented and built it and now they are turning it against US !! Im not going to pay.
MM: That will make us sounds hypocrite.
GERL: F U
MM: And so it doesnt work now, izzit ? What are you going to do?
GERL: Im thinking of invading the Ottoman ourselves. You know, if you want things to be right, you have to do it youselves.
MM: And now You are going to invade another country ? In this modern age ?
GERL: Why not, they got things we want.
MM: And what is that ?
GERL: HELLLLOOO ! Anybody there? They got chicks over there, chicks !Of couse its OIL you idiot, its all about OIL !!! Your Three horse Chariots, 3500sqf house, Aircons, TV, what think you think powered these ?
MM: Dont we have enough oil ourselves ?
GERL: When can anyone have enough ?
MM: Ok, it is getting hot in here, isn't it ? Wooot ...
GERL: Anymore questions ?
MM: Lets talk about your coming election.
GERL: Great ! This is what im waiting for.
MM: So how were you planning you strategy.
GERL: Simple ! Im sure to win this election ?
MM: And hows that ?
GERL: Cause im going to declare that the Ottoman is going to use Weapon of Mass destruction against us and we will have to go to war.
MM: And then ?
GERL: Then i will call a revolution, you hear me, A REVOLUTION !!
MM: Wow !!!
GERL: And we're going to change into Communsim.
MM: Why ?
GERL: You moron. So that i can rule forever !!
MM: Oh great, your highness.
GERL: You betcha.
MM: K, lets me congratulate you on this one then.
GERL: Thanks !!
MM: Let me congratulate you, sir, for conquering the Roman Empire.
GERL: Thank you. It's nothing actually.
MM: No sir, it was very impressive indeed. The Carthage, The Celts, The Korean, The Arab and now India, France, Scandinavia, Persia and Rome. It was nothing short of spectacular.
GERL: Oh, its not all my work actually, i got to thank my family for their support and of course all of you men out there so that we can unite this continent.
MM: Must you eliminate all the races just so to unite the continent ?
GERL: Well, lets say your country is going strong and some low cultured civilisation is blocking your advancement so you really have to remove them. Ahem .
MM: Why can't we all just live together in harmony ? Isn't there enough land for all of us?
GERL: SEX !!!
MM: Pardon me sir ?
GERL: Errrrr..., nothing. Why you asked ?
GERL: I was saying Its not fair that they got the better land than us. You know, we HCE are much more " advance", so we do really need more space for our cattle ranch, Chariot racing, 3500 sqf houses with garden and gigantic fooball field.
MM: Thought i heard something, must be my bad. Sorry sir.
MM: So, we just needed more space ? Yeah ?
GERL: Thats right.
MM: But why are we still enslaving their people ? Making them work in our fields and construct roads ?
GERL: Thats because our own people got better things to do. Like arts, researching, training for war and pondering on how to better our lives. For all of us, even those workers .
MM: Dont they have their rights too ? They are human just like you and me, you know.
GERL: They DO have their right, you know~. They have the power to vote ever since we became a Democracy.
MM: Yes, they sure can, but provided they must first pass a literacy test or at least have a grandfather and father who had passed the test before.
GERL: Same rules applied to all the citizen of HCE. All citizen must at least reach a certain literacy standard before they can vote, so we know that they will make the "right" choice.
MM: But isn't it the spirit of "Universal Suffrage" that everyone can vote regardless of age, race, language, sex, religion or social standard ?
GERL: Errr.. well, we called it "Universal Suffrage" only because it sounds better and hey, everyone in the world call it "Universal", see the English and Egyptian. Its actually "Women Suffrage", we builded it so that all the women will STF* when all the men go to war.
MM: I get it, so its acutally a publicity stunt, i get it.
GERL: Glad you do.
MM: So, lets move on to world politics shall we ?
GERL: Sure, shoot.
MM: What do you think of the war between British, China, Egypt and Zulu against the Ottoman ?
GERL: They're all suckers.
MM: Why would you say that ?
GERL: You know, its was actually my idea for Britain to attack the Ottoman?
MM: Wow ! How did you do that ?
GERL: It was easy actually. I signed a Alliance against the Ottoman with the British. I also supply some "wine" to them.
But actaully they had asked for some "Saltpeter".
MM: So u brided the British with "Wine" ? Why dont you give them "Saltpeter" so that they can build better units like Musketmen ?
GERL: Nah, i heard the British actually fought better when you give them Booze and Beer. Trust me, I saw" Waterloo".
MM: And the Chinese , Egyptian and Zulu ?
GERL: Lets start with the Zulu.
MM: Im listening.
GERL: As you know the Zulu are a sorry bunch. They lost their country since ancient time and been wandering the world just to find a place to live. But nooo... they wanted more. They started to outperform the local crowd. Out doing them in every way.
MM: That was impressive.
GERL: If only things are so easy. You see, the local crowd don't like it. And so they started to have rivalry between the races. This is bad for the local authority. The local pressured them to do something about it. Hey, it wasnt our fault when some for you guys are born losers. Of course this doesnt happened in the HCE.
MM: Thats because you kept them out.
GERL: Thereofore, we decided to gave them a place to live. So they can go play with themselve over there.
MM: And how you got them into the war ?
GERL: I was figuring, if i don't get the Zulu on our side, the Ottoman will. So it better that we do it first. This also apply to the Egyptian.
MM: K, i get it, Its either you are with US or against US.
GERL: Hey, i like that. Its either you're with US or against US. Its either you're... Its either...
MM: And the Chinese ?
GERL: Oh, you mean the Reds ?
MM: Yes.
GERL: Those Son of a *****
MM: Why you say that?
GERL: I wouldnt trust those Commuist even with a slingshot let alone a gun.
MM: But then why you get them, thought you hate them.
GERL: Thats because the British and Zulu couldnt get the job done. They were being slapped left right by the Ottoman.
MM: Not surprise from the second superpower.
GERL: So i have to lower my voice and get the Chinese to join the war. So embrassing.
MM: Also this time, you have to trade in "Saltpeter" and some technology.
GERL: SEX !!!
MM: Hey you did it again !! I swear i heard that !!
GERL: Heard what ?
MM: You shouted "Sex" !!
GERL: No I didn't.
MM: Yes you did, i heard that.
GERL: Oh i was saying Saxaphone, you know the one before me like to play that.
MM: Errr......
GERL: Ok, lets get back to the interview.
MM: Errrr.. sure
GERL: I was saying damn those Reds. I actually wanted to isolate them before they can rise up and challenge the ORIGINAL HCE. But noooo. I was forced to make peace with them. Else the Ottoman would have win the war.
MM: So you managed to get all these countries to fight for us without fighting the ear ourselves, Its just like a internet proxy. Yeah, its the proxy war.
GERL: Oh yes, I got a great idea, this should be called a proxy war. Man, i'm so smart.
MM: Yeah~~
MM: So why do you wanted this war initially?
GERL: Well, at first the Ottoman, The Reds and The British are living peacefully together and exchanging their research and technology between themselves. leaving us out of the loop. I was so damn pissed, that wasn't fair ! They should trade with us, you know, US !!! So i set up some international bodies to monitor the trading between the nation, making sure that they have to abide the trading rules and trade fairly.
MM: But we impose sanction and levy on their products?
GERL: Thats because they dont trade fairly !! Especially the damned Reds. They sell their products way under value than the ones that we produced and undercut us at the world market. They can afford to pay low wages to their people and exploit their own people.
MM: Maybe its because they have a lower standard of living ?
GERL: Bull**** , everyone deserved a Three horse chariot and 3500sqf house.
MM: Im sure they all do.
GERL: But too bad, the trade bodies are not doing their jobs and now these countries are turning it against US ! You know, US ! We invented and built it and now they are turning it against US !! Im not going to pay.
MM: That will make us sounds hypocrite.
GERL: F U
MM: And so it doesnt work now, izzit ? What are you going to do?
GERL: Im thinking of invading the Ottoman ourselves. You know, if you want things to be right, you have to do it youselves.
MM: And now You are going to invade another country ? In this modern age ?
GERL: Why not, they got things we want.
MM: And what is that ?
GERL: HELLLLOOO ! Anybody there? They got chicks over there, chicks !Of couse its OIL you idiot, its all about OIL !!! Your Three horse Chariots, 3500sqf house, Aircons, TV, what think you think powered these ?
MM: Dont we have enough oil ourselves ?
GERL: When can anyone have enough ?
MM: Ok, it is getting hot in here, isn't it ? Wooot ...
GERL: Anymore questions ?
MM: Lets talk about your coming election.
GERL: Great ! This is what im waiting for.
MM: So how were you planning you strategy.
GERL: Simple ! Im sure to win this election ?
MM: And hows that ?
GERL: Cause im going to declare that the Ottoman is going to use Weapon of Mass destruction against us and we will have to go to war.
MM: And then ?
GERL: Then i will call a revolution, you hear me, A REVOLUTION !!
MM: Wow !!!
GERL: And we're going to change into Communsim.
MM: Why ?
GERL: You moron. So that i can rule forever !!
MM: Oh great, your highness.
GERL: You betcha.
MM: K, lets me congratulate you on this one then.
GERL: Thanks !!
.
