Theodora's Always War Sid Excellent Adventure

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The Monument

In 1335AD this happened:


Then this:As a result, Theodora has a huge pile of ivory and gold created from the meltdown of the SoZ.


Theodora has been thinking. :hmm: She is a woman of beauty, style and grace. Her city centers however lack a certain beauty, style and grace. Theodora has the most wonderful set of wits in the world, and her city parks should be wonderful also. She loves to visit the city parks after a shopping spree for shoes at the market. In the park she meditates on the things that make life meaningful. She reflects deeply on things such as such as color, fabric and ensemble accessorization in these reflective moments. In one of these moments Theodora has had a brainstorm. She decides to accessorize her parks! She wants to create monuments honoring those whose writings in the Great Library have educated Theodora, as well as those whose inventions and writings have served or amused Theodora in some way. The royal council of artisans has been commissioned to appear before Throdora.

Theodora: What have you come up with for that huge pile of gold and ivory we wound up with after we torched the SoZ?

Artisans: What if we erect a monument in the capital’s city park to honor those who have educated, served, pleased or amused you in some fashion?

Theodora: Start over, I lost my train of thought when you said erect.

Artisans: What if we build a monument in the capital city center to honor each of those who have educated, served, or amused you in some fashion?

Theodora: Sounds good. Instead of the Great Wall, we will call it the Wall of the Greats. By order of the queen a fashionable monument will be immediately built in the Byzantine central park from the remains of the Statue of Zeus. This Wall of the Greats will honor those listed below because they have been found worthy:

betazed - Once upon a time Theodora knew little of the way of Always War. Then a war master known as betazed revealed to her many secrets.

Moonsinger - War cannot be won without artillery. The most influential (for Theodora anyway) war academy article ever written was the artillery article by moonsinger.

A Space Oddity - Theodora’s first SG experience was in Space 01. It was, of course, an always war game and gave birth to the grumpy old man series in GR01. The leader of Space 01 was A Space Oddity whose company pleased Theodora very much.

Greebley - It was during Space 01 that Theodora became acquainted with Greebley, an SG player of superior skill, tactics and intellect.

T_McC – during GR01 Theodora met T_McC. T_McC remains one of Theodora’s favorite AW players. And T_McC01 remains one of Theodora’s favorite all time AW games because of the huge hole that the team dug out of.

Barbslinger - How can you not like an AW player with Gun Toting Beer Drinker under his avatar.

Yom - A charter member of the Grumpy Old Men of Always War, Yom is out there somewhere, buried under an avalanche of AP course homework.

Dianthus - Theodora could not survive without CRpsuite, and Dianthus definitely deserves a round of applause and a statue in his honor.

:worship: Padma ; Turner 727 and Chieftess. :worship:
The Three. Theodora cannot exist without them. :D

SirPleb - Would Theodora be laughing her way through AWS without the tactic filled stories of SirPleb? She thinks not.

Mark1031 – AWS OCC WIN. Enough said.

LKendter - Soon to pass the century mark in SG’s, LKendter has earned a place for sure. The writings of his SGs fill an entire wing of the Great library.

Tomoyo gets a city name because Theodora thinks Tomoyo has the most excellent ever-changing avatars, and Tomoyo knows the game. Also, Theodora is shamelessly sucking up in the hopes she can gain a spot on Tomoyo’s legendary games list.

Doc Tsiolkovski He holds a doctorate in the workings of C3C, and his writings amuse and educate Theodora.

Sir Bugsy – A player of good cheer and great knowledge. Always a pure pleasure to play with. Besides, and anyone who has an AWD Pangaea win under his belt is a player.

Bede – A gentleman and a scholar and a also pleasure to play with. Any team that has Bede on it is an improved team.

TedJackson – One of Theodora’s all time favorite players. Theodora finds his writings both amusing and informative.

THeRat – anyone who gets up to speed as fast as Rat in high-level AW deserves a statue.

Northern Pike – Great player. Great writer. Great Avatar. Great name. Can’t think of a deficiency.

Admiral Kutzov – Wonderful player considering he is a complete idiot. ;)

Mad-Bax – Theodora only had the luck to play with Mad once, but she is a big fan of the avatar and writings.

Karasu – a gentleman and a scholar. When he writes, Theodora reads.

Combat Calculator Author – Whoever created the combat calculator has a spot reserved.

Arathorn – Winners of AWS games Theodora has read automatically get a spot. Regardless of how easy it is. :lol:

EvanCiv - for creating those very useful citizen smiley face badges.

Check back periodically for updates. Theodora is tired of typing for now and wants to go shop.
 
handy900 said:
Tomoyo gets a city name because Theodora thinks Tomoyo has the most excellent ever-changing avatars, and Tomoyo knows the game. Also, Theodora is shamelessly sucking up in the hopes she can gain a spot on Tomoyo’s legendary games list.
I was just gonna put this there! :eek:

You read my mind...
 
You've got pretty good momentum, should take an effort to lose. Was that what the :lol: was for?
 
Chapter Ten

Theodora is excited. The huge Wall of the Greats has been established in the capital city’s central park. Byzantines from all over the island empire have come to read of the legends that have been memorialized on the wall. A mysterious Byzantine citizen known only as Shakespearodora has turned many of the legendary stories into dramas.

Given the overwhelming amount of time Theodora has spent on the Wall of the Greats, she is anxious to hear the after action report of her military commanders who have returned from France.

Major Woody: Good morning Theodora, we have prepared an after action report.

Theodora: Yes Major Woody, tell me what you have been up to. :lol: Oh I’m soooo funny.

Major Woody: Err, ugh, yes… Well, things went very well early on in France. As you know, we razed Marseilles to open up some real estate to create the opportunity to deploy Operation Byzantine Babe Magnet.

Theodora: I bet it worked too, Joan is pretty ugly. Joan is so ugly there is a sign in her throne room that says “Beware of Dog”. Her troops must have been ecstatic at the site of a beautiful Byzantine Bikini Babe :wow: .

Major Woody: Yes, they were ecstatic, it actually worked a little too well. As you can see in the picture below, Strike Force Beta was moving north from the icy of Marseilles and got caught in a traffic jam of pikes anxious to impress the Byzantine Babe. But, their pikes were inadequate and she departed via Babe Barge.


Theodora: So force Beta and Alpha did not link up at Rheims as planned?

Major Woody: No, but Alpha razed Rheims anyway in 1380.

General Mayhem: A fine plan it was Theodora! The problem was Joan’s inability to act in accordance with the genius of the plan of Theodora. She is indeed stupid. Joan is so dumb she thinks Hot Meals are stolen food. Anyway, she responded to your plan by surrounding our inadequate army with superior numerical units and firepower.

Major Woody: Yes, classic military error, the use of overwhelming numbers and superior firepower and cutting the enemy off from reinforcement. Textbook error.

Theodora: Exactly! We were outgunned, out flanked, and out numbered. Perfect! We had Joan right where we wanted her, out in the open and not in her cities. Did you execute the appropriate measures?

General Mayhem: Yes, while we positioned Alpha to raze Rheims, the Byzantine Bikini Babe headed to the western coast of France to open up a coastal lane toward Chartres for Force Beta.

Theodora: Sweet.

Major Woody: We razed Chartres in 1385. Taking Rheims and Chartres back to back had to hurt Joan.

Theodora: I take great pleasure in Joan’s pain. :) Did you execute the rest of my Plan?

Major Woody: Yes. It just took a little longer to take Lyons than we had hoped, and Joan also settled the ruins very quickly and we had to deal with the new cities. The lack of roads also slowed us some.

Theodora: Can’t be helped. We had no choice but to raze Joan’s roads. What happened next?

Major Woody: It took quite some time to raze Lyons. There were so many huge stacks all over the place that when the Byzantine Babe pulled one stack out of Lyons, another stack moved into Lyons. Stacks of Death as far as the eye could see. Finally we just bombed the city to a pulp and killed a bunch of units. It was somewhat costly but Lyons fell in 1430. Then 1455 came along.

Theodora: You did something very special for Theodora in 1455, didn’t you?

General Mayhem: We sure did! Check this out.



Theodora: I’m so pleased and so beautiful. My wits are all ablaze. Is there anything else before I go the mall for a celebratory pair of shoes?

Major Woody: Would you like a heads up on Sumeria.

Theodora: Heads up eh? I like the sound of a heads up from Major Woody!

Major Woody: Yes, ugh, err… we have pillaged Sumeria and will soon be landing some units there in anticipation of an attack on Lagash. As you can see we have been running a blockade to starve the city, and one of the Byzantine Bikini Babes [dressed as a knight] pulled some units onto that mountain to get them out of the city. Lagash is starving and will soon be less than size 6.


Theodora: Nice work. Keep it up Major Woody. :rotfl:

And with that Theodora left the throne room laughing hilariously at her little joke, at her good fortune, and especially at Joan’s pain at the loss of her palace.
 
Why is the AI so stupid on what should be the hardest difficulty level?!? Can't they make a Beyond Sid difficulty level like Bamspeedy?
 
lurker's comment: They can. But all they can do is keep giving the AI more. Chieftan to Sid and beyond, it's still the same dumb 'ol string of computer code.
 
This is good so far... 2 questions
one, why did you distroy citys with wonders in them?
and two, why did you name your citys AWS and 1 and 2 and so on?
 
CoolioVonHoolio said:
This is good so far... 2 questions
one, why did you distroy citys with wonders in them?
and two, why did you name your citys AWS and 1 and 2 and so on?

My culture is far below France and I did not want to slow down to quell resistance and/or lose them to a flip. I did keep the Lighthouse. I captured that Chinese city last so I would not have to risk a flip. I also rushed a library in the Lighthouse city to avoid the Aztecs taking it from me. I'll try to keep Leo's, Magellans and Sun Tzu. I did not want to capture SoZ as the last French city because I'd have more Acav to deal with. I wanted it gone first. It probably would have flipped and just been a royal pain to keep taking.

I don't like to MM very much, a little is okay, but every city every turn is not my cup of tea. But you must MM at least decently to win on high levels. Giving core cities names like 2,3,4,5 places them at the top of F1 so I can MM them more quickly. AWS is for Always War Sid. The 11_AWS makes it first on F1. Chinese cities are c1, c2, c3. Island cities are i1, i2, i3. Sometimes I forget to remane them when I settle and do it later.

If a player really MM'd this game for every last shield and coin they could probably finish centuries before I will. Also I regret going for chem before banking. This really is a fairly easy game, AWDG on continents or AWE pangaea standard size map is usually alot harder IMHO. This game just takes a long time to play and gets a little tedious.

How do u get away with these jokes?
:lol: Who knows. :lol:

Chieftan to Sid and beyond, it's still the same dumb 'ol string of computer code.
Yeah, you have to use the computer against itself. But I do avoid the blatant exploits like free wealth. I think my biggest only LK banned exploit is the Byzantine Babe Bait & Switch.

It is amazing to see just how big the French SODs are even with so few cities left. The MI stacks are huge. Also it seemed like Joan would resettle almost immediatly. Some ruins were razed three times as Joan kept getting settlers to the sites very quickly.
 
Great game, and fun report. Can you just clarify exactly how the baiting of city garrisons to make them desert their posts works? I presume you are landing one weak unit two squares away, just out of reach, and that this is proving irresistible for the AI.
 
Offa said:
Great game, and fun report. Can you just clarify exactly how the baiting of city garrisons to make them desert their posts works? I presume you are landing one weak unit two squares away, just out of reach, and that this is proving irresistible for the AI.

Exactly. :goodjob:

One big surprise for me was how Joan spread her stacks out all over the place in response to the bait & switch, which created the traffic jam you see above. She would essentially move 1/2 a stack each time I baited her so the available tiles became few and far between. Lucky for me she was too dumb to just cover all her tiles, and she eventually quit splitting her stacks.

It's more like bait & run than bait & switch. :lol:
 
What weak unit are you using? Earlier you were talking about Theo herself landing, did you send your Regicide King (Empress :lol: ) unit there?
 
Dachspmg said:
What weak unit are you using? Earlier you were talking about Theo herself landing, did you send your Regicide King (Empress :lol: ) unit there?

Explorers work really well because they can dart out from under an army to the appropriate spot. Then they can run like he** when the AI get close. Warriors, LBs, whatever extra is laying around are okay too, but you have to drop them from a boat. Planning ahead is a must.

Theodora pulled the stunt against Mao, but she refused to set foot on French soil so she sent the Byzantine Bikini Babe instead. :cool:

I took some time lapse photos of the bait & switch run against Sumeria over three turns for Offa, and I'll post them tomorrow. :goodjob:
 
I'll buy Theodora an Orange Julius and a slice of Sbarro's if she gets back to this story soon.

V
 
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