Imperium Offtopicum IX
- Thread starter Tani Coyote
- Start date
Omega124
Challenging Fate
The year is quite clearly 487 AD. At least it was before we were transported to this weird, kingless, godless, and chivalrousless world.
Pink Sturm is the god-king of this world. Watch your tounge.
Robert Can't
Éponine
And you're arguing with me.
And this is probably getting to the point of unwanted Spam so I'll throw in some diplomacy:
Trade!?!
And this is probably getting to the point of unwanted Spam so I'll throw in some diplomacy:
Trade!?!
Are you insinuating that there was another point to this game?
Robert Can't
Éponine
Yes, Yes I am.
hoplitejoe
Top fun-poster
- Joined
- Mar 22, 2010
- Messages
- 5,470
JohannaK
Heroically Clueless
I side with Grantaire, and I am gonna look for a pic of Javert right now.
Robert Can't
Éponine
JohannaK
Heroically Clueless
I knew this change would favour me somehow
Hawai accepts trade with whichever nation is ruled by that apolitical drunkard known as Grantaire.
I am shocked and appalled.
GenMarshall
High Elven ISB Capt & Ghost Agent
The Republic of Coruscant is still awaiting patiently for Hawai's response on our deal.I knew this change would favour me somehow
Hawai accepts trade with whichever nation is ruled by that apolitical drunkard known as Grantaire.
Tani Coyote
Son of Huehuecoyotl
- Joined
- May 28, 2007
- Messages
- 15,195
Just because it's not as structured as a usual TanIOT doesn't mean spam should be the main point. I do enjoy humor (and reward it) but too much spam will probably incur the wrath of Iblis, Enerjak and Venice combined.
As for the date: I didn't really have one in mind. Be whatever you want.
Maybe we could argue we're all in time wormholes, was was the case in IOT IV, where Omega's nation had a day for every 24 hours, me 6 months for 24 hours, and 3 months for Mathalamus'.
As for the year let's compromise. I say it's 2422, halfway between RC and AA's suggested dates.
Kinich-Ahau
#JustGoomyThings
'Leader' looked out at his capital, and smiled.
Nou Fortăreaţă Oraş was a vast underground citadel, an inpenetrable fortress of a city that would never- could never- fall to hostiles. Not that CFCopia had much hostiles; indeed, New Kinichikia had remained relatively isolationist in the region, with the only time they had gotten involved in international affairs being the air support given to the United National Front in the Mechaerikistan Civil War.
As 'Leader''s thoughts turned to the United National Front, he had to force down a rising tide of anger. They called themselves right-wing, he thought. They claimed they would bring back Mechaeriskistan's honor. But they had done anything but; shortly after the UNF had won the Civil War, the fascist Blue Legion- a hitherto unknown, at least to New Kinichikia, faction of the UNF- had taken over the provisional government and created an oppresive, fascist, orwellian state.
'Leader' sighed, and was about to call in his assistant Aeneas Kronid, when said assistant walked right into his office, a puzzled look on his face.
"Ah, Kronid," said 'Leader', "I was just about to summon you. Now, what I need is-"
"Sir," began Kronid, "I do not mean to interrupt, but I believe that the news I have brought may be slightly more important than what you were going to say."
'Leader' looked at Kronid expectantly. Kronid took a deep breath and said, "Sir, it would appear that all of New Kinichikia has been teleported."
'Leader' was silent for a moment, then laughed, a deep, booming laugh; a laugh that went on uninterrupted for at least two minutes. When he finally stopped, 'Leader' wiped a tear from his eye, and said, "That is the most ridiculous piece of garbage I've hear all day; you really need to get in more practice if you seek to fool me."
"But sir, it's true- I swear it," said Kronid, "If you don't believe me, then why don't we make a deal; if what I had told you is false, I shall forfiet my pension."
That got 'Leader''s attention. "Okay, wise guy," he said cautiously, "I'll make that deal." 'Leader' turned to the intercom, pressed a button, & said "Eugen, bring up the feed in Spy Satelight G421-S9,"
"Yes sir," came the immediate response, as the viewscreen on the East wall of 'Leader''s office changed to display the satelight images.
"Now zoom in on Goa; I would like to see the Captol Building of the Dictatorship of West India."
"Of course, sir."
The satelight feed zoomed in, upon the city of Goa, and when 'Leader' & Aeneas Kronid saw what had become of the city, they were stunned into silence.
It was 'Leader' who had recovered first. "But, but, but, that is impossible-" he stammered, "Why, just the other day the Dictator of West India was telling me how massive his lake full of money was; the whole country couldn't have dissapeared so quickly, not without us knowing!"
The satelight feed swept over severel of the areas surrounding Goa; there was no trace of the Dictatorship of West India.
"Show me Dominus," 'Leader' shouted at the intercom, but when the satelight swept over to where the Capital city of Renfair should have been, he could see nothing; no trace of civilization.
"This cannot be," said 'Leader', a wild look in his eye, "Show me the rest of the world!"
Eugen complied, and though the satelight found plenty of cities on the world, at varying levels of technology, it could find no trace of the nations familiar to 'Leader'.
"Where is Grouchomarxia? Where is Nova-Olaf? Where is New Nukehavistan? WHERE IS REDSPYLAND!?!?!?" 'Leader' screamed at no-one in particular.
"They're gone, sir," said Aeneas Kronid quietly, "Only we are left; well, given that this planet has shown extensive signs of civilization- just unfamiliar civilization- it would likely be more accurate to say that only we are gone."
'Leader' sat down and ran his fingers through his hair; for the first time, he regretted banning alcohol in New Kinichikia.
"We must be cautious," he said at last, "This world is dangerous & unfamiliar; one wrong step, and poof, me, you, and every last New Kinichikianite on the planet could die; or they could not, who knows? Right now, the only thing that we can be certain of is that we are in strange, possibly hostile territory. We should tread cautiously. Our first order of business should be to establish diplomatic relations with the other countries."
Suddenly, 'Leader''s phone rang. He answered & spoke for several minutes, before hanging up & turning to Aeneas Kronid.
"Speak of the Devil," 'Leader' said, "Law Enforcement recently picked up some strange fellows wandering around our western territories; they claimed to be from a nation known as the 'Paris Commune,' and have come to offer us several diplomatic agreements. The event prompted the air force to send helicopters to patrol the borders, where they picked up people claiming to be from a part of India ruled by the 'Hadely Dynasty,' or some such, and a group of merchants from what they called 'The Most Interesting Nation in the Worldistan.' Funny, eh?"
'Leader' straitened his tie, then turned & said to Aeneas, "This is important; I should meet these diplomats in person. Hold the fort until I'm gone, would you?"
"Of course, sir," replied Aeneas, as 'Leader' left his office and prepared to make a good first impression upon the foriegners.
Accept trade with the Hadley Dynasty
@French Commune, Communism is just as bad as, if not worse than, fascism. We reject your offers of trade & an NAP. Furthermore, given your absurd asention that Capitalists are a threat as great as Fascists or Imperialists, we shall boycott the Paris Conference
Offer/Accept trade with the Most Interesting Nation in the Worldistan
Offer trade to Straightlinia, Unicornia, Persia, Denmarji, Camelot, Zanzibar, New Zulu, Maqrok Imperium, Australia, & the Republic of Coruscant
OOC: I apologize in advance for any spelling errors; at the moment, I do not have access to spell check.
Nou Fortăreaţă Oraş was a vast underground citadel, an inpenetrable fortress of a city that would never- could never- fall to hostiles. Not that CFCopia had much hostiles; indeed, New Kinichikia had remained relatively isolationist in the region, with the only time they had gotten involved in international affairs being the air support given to the United National Front in the Mechaerikistan Civil War.
As 'Leader''s thoughts turned to the United National Front, he had to force down a rising tide of anger. They called themselves right-wing, he thought. They claimed they would bring back Mechaeriskistan's honor. But they had done anything but; shortly after the UNF had won the Civil War, the fascist Blue Legion- a hitherto unknown, at least to New Kinichikia, faction of the UNF- had taken over the provisional government and created an oppresive, fascist, orwellian state.
'Leader' sighed, and was about to call in his assistant Aeneas Kronid, when said assistant walked right into his office, a puzzled look on his face.
"Ah, Kronid," said 'Leader', "I was just about to summon you. Now, what I need is-"
"Sir," began Kronid, "I do not mean to interrupt, but I believe that the news I have brought may be slightly more important than what you were going to say."
'Leader' looked at Kronid expectantly. Kronid took a deep breath and said, "Sir, it would appear that all of New Kinichikia has been teleported."
'Leader' was silent for a moment, then laughed, a deep, booming laugh; a laugh that went on uninterrupted for at least two minutes. When he finally stopped, 'Leader' wiped a tear from his eye, and said, "That is the most ridiculous piece of garbage I've hear all day; you really need to get in more practice if you seek to fool me."
"But sir, it's true- I swear it," said Kronid, "If you don't believe me, then why don't we make a deal; if what I had told you is false, I shall forfiet my pension."
That got 'Leader''s attention. "Okay, wise guy," he said cautiously, "I'll make that deal." 'Leader' turned to the intercom, pressed a button, & said "Eugen, bring up the feed in Spy Satelight G421-S9,"
"Yes sir," came the immediate response, as the viewscreen on the East wall of 'Leader''s office changed to display the satelight images.
"Now zoom in on Goa; I would like to see the Captol Building of the Dictatorship of West India."
"Of course, sir."
The satelight feed zoomed in, upon the city of Goa, and when 'Leader' & Aeneas Kronid saw what had become of the city, they were stunned into silence.
It was 'Leader' who had recovered first. "But, but, but, that is impossible-" he stammered, "Why, just the other day the Dictator of West India was telling me how massive his lake full of money was; the whole country couldn't have dissapeared so quickly, not without us knowing!"
The satelight feed swept over severel of the areas surrounding Goa; there was no trace of the Dictatorship of West India.
"Show me Dominus," 'Leader' shouted at the intercom, but when the satelight swept over to where the Capital city of Renfair should have been, he could see nothing; no trace of civilization.
"This cannot be," said 'Leader', a wild look in his eye, "Show me the rest of the world!"
Eugen complied, and though the satelight found plenty of cities on the world, at varying levels of technology, it could find no trace of the nations familiar to 'Leader'.
"Where is Grouchomarxia? Where is Nova-Olaf? Where is New Nukehavistan? WHERE IS REDSPYLAND!?!?!?" 'Leader' screamed at no-one in particular.
"They're gone, sir," said Aeneas Kronid quietly, "Only we are left; well, given that this planet has shown extensive signs of civilization- just unfamiliar civilization- it would likely be more accurate to say that only we are gone."
'Leader' sat down and ran his fingers through his hair; for the first time, he regretted banning alcohol in New Kinichikia.
"We must be cautious," he said at last, "This world is dangerous & unfamiliar; one wrong step, and poof, me, you, and every last New Kinichikianite on the planet could die; or they could not, who knows? Right now, the only thing that we can be certain of is that we are in strange, possibly hostile territory. We should tread cautiously. Our first order of business should be to establish diplomatic relations with the other countries."
Suddenly, 'Leader''s phone rang. He answered & spoke for several minutes, before hanging up & turning to Aeneas Kronid.
"Speak of the Devil," 'Leader' said, "Law Enforcement recently picked up some strange fellows wandering around our western territories; they claimed to be from a nation known as the 'Paris Commune,' and have come to offer us several diplomatic agreements. The event prompted the air force to send helicopters to patrol the borders, where they picked up people claiming to be from a part of India ruled by the 'Hadely Dynasty,' or some such, and a group of merchants from what they called 'The Most Interesting Nation in the Worldistan.' Funny, eh?"
'Leader' straitened his tie, then turned & said to Aeneas, "This is important; I should meet these diplomats in person. Hold the fort until I'm gone, would you?"
"Of course, sir," replied Aeneas, as 'Leader' left his office and prepared to make a good first impression upon the foriegners.
Accept trade with the Hadley Dynasty
@French Commune, Communism is just as bad as, if not worse than, fascism. We reject your offers of trade & an NAP. Furthermore, given your absurd asention that Capitalists are a threat as great as Fascists or Imperialists, we shall boycott the Paris Conference
Offer/Accept trade with the Most Interesting Nation in the Worldistan
Offer trade to Straightlinia, Unicornia, Persia, Denmarji, Camelot, Zanzibar, New Zulu, Maqrok Imperium, Australia, & the Republic of Coruscant
OOC: I apologize in advance for any spelling errors; at the moment, I do not have access to spell check.
bestrfcplayer
Steppin' up!
Aussieland offers an NAP to all nations bordering the pacific.
Omega124
Challenging Fate
Eh, why not? We need the trade.
GenMarshall
High Elven ISB Capt & Ghost Agent
The Republic accepts the trade deal.
Celticfury
King
Claims edited.
Similar threads
