A World Rewritten: an Interactive Dawn of Civilization Narrative (Official Thread)

Welcome! This is the official thread for the new DoC interactive narrative. I am mrrandomplayer, author of several DoC stories, but enough about me! I am guessing that you are wondering what this is.

A World Rewritten is at core, an AI commentary. I have enabled cheating, turned off the fog of war, "played" the game as an NPC minor civ with no cities, and taken pictures of the entire game. However, in this game, I upload the pictures, but all of you CFCers tell the story!

That sounds great and everything, but how do I sign up?

That is extremely simple. You first choose an alive civ on the map at the time of the update (there will be a list of vacant civs). Then, you post in the signup thread that you would like to be that civ, and that's it!

I've signed up now. How do I actually play?

Good question! Once you have picked that civ, after each update, you see what your civ has done and how it has interacted. After reading that, you must write up (history book and narrative style are both fine) who did the actions, how they where done, and why. You can also flesh out the culture and organization of the empire. Basically, it is a worldbuilding/storytelling game.

What if my civ dies or I want to change to another civ?

Not a problem! Just post in the signup/questions/hangout thread that you are changing to the new civ. Then, after the next update, you can start posting for your new civ!

What if someone else wants to be the same civ as me?

Preferably, I would like the two of you to work it out amongst yourselves. Usually, it would just be collaborating on certain things or just writing about different topics within the empire.

What if I want to drop?

Just tell me in the other thread. DO NOT just dissapear, as I will bombard you with visitor messages and private messages. If you are leaving temporarily, just tell me when you will be back.

What if I have other questions or want to talk about the story OOC?

Then use this thread.. Hint: it is the same as the signup thread.

I think that's all!

Table of Contents:
Egypt:
Update 1
China:
Update 1
Greece:
Update 1
Phoenicia:
Update 1
Current Update: 3
Waiting for: Rome

Update 1:

Turn 1:
Egypt and China start the game. Niwt-Rst and Changan are founded.




Turn 7:
Warriors are sent out to explore by both nations.



Turn 15:
China sends out a Scout to explore.


Turn 28:
China is researching Writing and Egypt is researching Pottery.



Turns 29-33:
Infrastructure is slowly being built in both civs.



Turn 39:
Hinduism is founded in the new Harappan (Independent) city of Varanasi. Ocelotto, you can write about the Harappa if you want but you don't have to.


Turn 42:
Confucianism is founded in Changan. More infrastructure has also been built.


Turn 46:
The Hanging Gardens are built in Niwt-Rst.


Turn 48:
Guangzhou is founded.


Turns 50-51:
Greece is born at Athens. They settle there and send a Settler northwest.



Turn 51:
Egypt is researching Archery, China is researching The Wheel after finishing Mathematics, and Greece is researching Masonry.




Turn 54-57:
India is born and settles Pataliputra. Varanasi and Dilli flip to India. Greece also settles Epidamnos.




Turn 57: Egypt and Greece are Pleased while China and India are Cautious towards each other due to religious differences. China is now researching Construction and India is now researching Priesthood.






Turn 65: Egypt has settled Per-Atum.


Turns 66-67: Phoenicia is born.



That is all for this update! The next update is going to be sometime next weekend, so try to have your stories written by then. Now, go define your civilizations' actions!

You may now post.

Egypt

A long, long time ago, in the year of the-calendar-has-not-been-invented-yet...

Chief Ramesses looked upon his band of 999 people. They had been hunter-nomads for time uncountable, killing the big game roaming the Sahara plains. But now, the Sahara had suddenly changed in a desert without any known reason, and the band of men found themselves on the banks of the river Nile.

Ramesses: Woe, woe, oh people! We find ourselves without a home, and without food. Now, if we only had the knowledge of Sedentary Lifestyle, we could make this place a home and gather grains from the field! But no, we do not know how to settle

*Rumbling*

Suddenly the tribe was surrounded by houses and the sand coloured a bright yellow.

Ramesses: ... Right. I appoint me as the king of this polytheistic society, who are all slaves to the great and mighty Ramesses! I will now allow the Elder Council to vote on this motion. Elder Council, step forth!

A small, elderly man rises his hand.

Man: Uh, sir, you are the only member of the Elder Council

Ramesses: That is true! How could I possibly have forgotten? The motion has passed unanimously! Well, as I will now have to spend all the time on the running of this nation, I will need a new elder to advise me. Elderly man, I choose you!

The elderly man suddenly grows, his hairs becoming a dark brown and the wrinkles in his face disappearing.

Ramesses: Oh, I forgot to mention that everyone in the Pharaoh's entourage gets eternal life too. What is your name, Elderly man?

Elderly man: It is Pi-Caxum, great Pharaoh.

Ramesses: What should we do first, Pi-Caxum?

Pi-Caxum: Our city of Niwt-Rst is unhealthy and the people are dying by masses from mosquitoe bites, great Pharaoh! We should scout to find more fertile grounds.

Ramesses: Then let us assemble a group of three sturdy men to explore the surrounding region! You, you, and you, go scouting!

Pi-Caxum: Great Pharaoh, that is not how it works. We have to wait several centuries before we will find three men who have learned the complicate arts of club-bearing and walking. However, the proces can be sped up by working the stone quarry west of our city, as this mysterious material, surely sent by the gods, greatly improves our tribe's ability to wear clubs and walk.

Ramesses: Well, let us gather the stone and wait!

Several centuries later...

Ramesses: Zzzzz...

Pi-Caxum: Pharaoh, it is time to wake up! We have found three men!

Ramesses: Let us send them to the north-east!

Pi-Caxum: Pharaoh, we surely need more of those bands to wander aimlessly around our lands.

But after they have been trained, I propose the construction of a great project to improve your citizens' access to water and food!

Ramesses: Not interested.

Pi-Caxum: ... Which will be remembered as the great Hanging Gardens of Ramesses, constructed during his reign, and according to myth, completely built by his own hands!

Ramesses: That sounds more like it. But, say, I have this odd urge to construct a giant lion statue with a human face...

Pi-Caxum: That is an option, oh Pharaoh, but that will only allow us to hire more dudes with lutes.

Ramesses: Yes, we already have enough of them.

Ramesses' personal orchestra of dudes with lutes starts a new tune.



Soldier: Pharaoh, Pharaoh! Terrible blue people have been spotted in the north. They call themselves the Greeks!

Pi-Caxum: Pharaoh, I suggest we tell the sages to focus on unraveling the mysteries of Archery, which consist of throwing pointy sticks several hundred meters away by using a stick and a sturdy string.

Ramesses: If you already know what Archery is, why in Aton's sake do we have to research it?

Pi-Caxum: That is one of the great mysteries of the gods, oh Pharaoh...



Pi-Caxum: Our plans have succeeded! Seeing our current development in military technology, the Greeks have become Pleased with us.

Ramesses: Wasn't the whole point to make pin-cushions of them with our new bows?

Pi-Caxum: But Pharaoh, as the old saying says, the pen is mightier than the sword! Why achieve with warfare what diplomacy can do to?

Ramesses: What are pens? Those buildings we keep animals in?

Pi-Caxum: Oh, we haven't researched writing yet...



Pi-Caxum: We have trained a settler, ready to expand our lands! Let us settle a new city in the Nile delta towards our north, opening up trad -

Ramesses: No, I want a beach resort. We'll settle on those sand dunes to our east, with all the odd brown rocks in them.

Pi-Caxum: In our north there is also a sea, Pharaoh!

Ramesses: I don't want to spend the holidays watching that blue blob calling themselves the Greeks.

And so the second city of Egypt, Per-Atum, was settled on the Red Sea shore.

China

A long time ago in far east a civilization was born...

No one knows but this civilization would evolute and be a glorius celestial empire.The first settlement was Changan, a very fertile place.



The first emperor of China, Qin Shi Huang, a imortal, wanted more space to expand, because the celestial empire need to be the world largest nation, so he send some warriors to explore the Terra Icognita.



Unfulfilled, Qin Shi send some scouts, because he said:"作為一個帝國勇士還可以擴大，如果只是去每轉一平方！"



The first thing that China started to develop was the writing, to build the first imperial academy, the Taixue.



China is also the birt place of a religion-philosophy, created by Confucius and creatively called Confucianism.The pensants created a farm, cuz' they know if the empire lack food, they are first to die




Qin Shin, who was hungry to expand, so he created Guangzhou, in a fertile place AND with exit to the sea.To attack the Japan



To connect his GREAT empire, Qin Shin started to research the wheel, something that almost all the world had.

Qin Shin:



As Qin Shin don't trust in nobody, and was not the most reliable person, he had a cautious stance with he new neighbor, India, and vice-versa.

Qin Shin:




China was constantly threatened by barbarians, who wanted to kill Qin Shin, and Qin Shin in counterpart, was a coward and don't want to face the barbarians, so he started to research construction to build the Great Wall.



Qin Shin:GUARDS!!!Execute the narrator for treason!!

Narrator:I do not regret anything

Qin Shin:Next time I will narrate

Good updates! We still need Greece and India (and Phoenicia if they want to update) to update, but those will be much shorter.

(With apologies to Baseballpie)

The Aegean peninsular was the home of small communities during the Helladic period, a non-specific term used by historians to reference the period before 1700 BC when the Mycenaean period is generally seen as having begun.

The inhabitants of the Early Helladic period left little archaeological evidence of their way of life, all information about this period comes from a series of educated guesses using information gleaned from archaeological digs. Clay pots, bronze tools and jewelry from this era appear to show that these ancient Greeks lived in separated communities across the peninsular with the highest concentration in Northern Greece, there was no large scale agriculture and nearly all people were subsistence farmers and hunters. The main legacy from this period on what is known as the Greek civilization can be seen in the Helladic creation myths and their pantheon of gods which included a god of the Sky (later believed to have become Zeus) a god of the Earth (Hades) and a god of the Waters (Poseidon) as well as the language which many Greek words originated from.



The shift to the late Helladic is seen as coming from contact with the ancient Cretan Minoans (2700 BC- 1600 BC), during this period the communities in the Southern Greek peninsular experienced a population boom and an increase in importance surpassing the North. The Minoans introduced the wheel, fishing, more advanced bronze working techniques and their own gods who joined the expanding Greek pantheon. Southern Greek communities traded with the Minoans for exotic goods and this would explain the existence of several sites in Southern Greece where tools and jewelry of clear Egyptian manufacture have been discovered and vice versa in Northern Egypt. The Later Minoans also introduced sailing and perhaps most importantly of all a writing system which fused the early Helladic and Minoan languages which with the addition of some Mycenaean created what is known as “Old Greek.”



The collapse of the Minoan civilization circa 1700BC is believed to have spawned the Greek legends of Atlantis and ended the late Helladic period. Historians believe a ecological disaster on Crete (some historians also blame nearby volcanic activity) caused by population carrying capacity being exceeded caused a 100 year decline which effectively destroyed the Minoan way of life. The Peloponnese and South Aegean island communities suffered as a result of trade rapidly drying up as many had come to rely on the regular flow of Minoan traders. Renowned Greek historian Nikolas Kokinos described the situation in Greece as “a vacuum of power and influence where communities had become used to regular contact with the wider civilized world but seemingly unable to take the steps necessary to join it leaving them in limbo.”


It was in this vacuum that the Mycenaean period began from roughly 1700 BC, the Mycenaeans themselves were another wandering people, genealogical evidence supporting theories that they originated in Western Asia Minor and spread into the Balkans in the late Helladic period. While there were peaceful migrations, many aggressive Mycenaean tribes clashed with the local Helladics in Northern Greece in a manner similar to other communities across the Balkans, the evidence showing the more warlike Mycenaens coming out on top and supplanting the Northern Helladic communities.



In the area now known as Attica several local Helladic communities combined with more peaceful Mycenaean immigrants and possibly (according to archaeological evidence) Minoan refugees to defeat the Mycenaean aggressors. Greek legends speak of the Hero-King Ajax leader of the what have become known as the “Helladic Mycenaeans” who united and led several Mycenaean tribes and Helladic communities against the Mycenaean invaders who sought to intrude into Attica. According to Greek legend the Mycenaean tribes led by their evil chieftain Memmon (almost certainly a name fabricated by a later Greek historian as were tales that he feasted on human flesh) were defeated on the Pedias plains and Ajax was rewarded by the Gods with great wisdom for killing over a hundred men and delivering Memmon's soul personally to Hades so it would not escape (the exact method of delivering a soul seems to depend on the story teller themselves).



It is difficult to separate the embellishments of early Greek historians, who were effectively a better class of storyteller, from the fact but it seems likely that a Mycenaean leader (possibly named Ajax although unlikely to be 7ft tall) was able to unite several communities including Minoans with his own Mycenaeans, repulse or subjugate the Mycenaean tribes that came after and found the city which we would now call Athens. Ajax was held as something of a icon for all Greece for many years after he supposedly existed and his legacy can still be seen today in the name of the Athenian football team.



Between 1600 BC -1500 BC the city of Athens spread its influence over the rest of Attica, the South Aegean islands and east Peloponnese by providing protection from the Mycenaeans with it's large militia and by acting as the regional trading hub that had been missing since the collapse of the Minoans. Athens was ruled by a chief although the term “Tyrant,” meaning leader was applied in the later recordings of rulers.

Below we have an artists representation of a typical Helladic Mycenaean soldier from this era, although soldier is prehaps a misleading term as all men of a certain age were expected to contribute towards the militia establishlished by the Athenian chiefs by serving providing their own . A record was kept of the population (one of the first examples of a census) in communities under the Athenian control and expected contribution towards the militia was based on this although it was often inaccurate, another consideration for the Athenian chief was that during the harvest and planting seasons in Autumn and Sping the expected number of men dropped dramatically. As a result of these limitations the contempary historian Diomedes (the most reliable though not always chronicler of these times) explains how Athenian chiefs would let the agressive Mycenaean tribes move into the sparse hills to the north west of Athens over the Spring and Autumn before launching Summer and Winter campaigns to either subtjigate them or destroy them, in effect creating a buffer zone between the thriving Helladic communities in the south and east and the interlopers who were kept to the north and west.




Around 1300 BC a campaign of expansion was begun by the Athenian chief Nestor, we know that he was not a particulary large man even by the standards of the time but he achieved a place in Greek legend thanks to his cunning and foresight which if the stories are to be believed his mother won in game with the three fates, some stories also claim he was the son of Posiedon as compared to Ajax being Zeus's son.



Whatever the legends say all that can be concretely said is that Nestor brought the West Peloponnese under Athenian influence and then led the Helladic Mycenaean army North where he was able to gain the alliance of the local Mycaean tribes by leading them in victory over the Illyrian tribes in the area. Nestor would see the entirety of the Aegean peninsular brought either under Athenian direct rule or bound in alliance with Athens as well as the South Western balkans creating the Athenian empire




Nestor's final achievement was to reestablish colonies on Crete where the ruins of the Minoan culture were a reminder to the locals of how far they had fallen, this would also bring contract with the Egyptian Old Kingdom and soon enough Phoenician traders with whom Athenian Greece had much to trade.

\
The city of Sur was founded upon the banks of the Mediterranean, in the days when the world was different. The Phoenicians made Abibaal, who was an elder of the Phoenician peoples, their king and ruler. Abibaal's son, who was called Hiram, was the prince of his people, but also the chief adviser to the king, for Abibaal trusted few outside his own kin.
One night the father and son were out upon the west balcony of the palace of Sur at nighttime.
"To the north lies Anatolia," Hiram said, "where barbaric men and wild things dwell and make the land rotten."
"Unfortunate," Abibaal laughed, "rotten land is not good for trade. I suppose I will make no attempt to settle there anytime soon, if it is as bad as you say."
"To the east is the great empire of Babylon, which lies between the Tigris and the Euphrates Rivers, in what the Greeks call Mesopotamia."
"Is that land quite fertile?" asked Abibaal.
"Very."
"Hmm..."
"Anyway, to our south lies the petty Kingdom of Israel, where King Solomon has commissioned a great temple to be built to their god."
"Ha! Israel... I see nothing great coming out of there."
"But to our west lies the Mediterranean Sea, where we have traded with the Greeks in the past, and now we shall hopefully extend our trade further, and extend our empire further over its vast waters. Today shall be the day of Phoenicia, and tomorrow shall never come for our enemies!"

Update 2: Turns 68-90

Turn 68: Just a quick diplomatic overview. Note how Babylonian-Phoenician relations have soured quickly.




Turn 75: The Independent city of Zhongdu (Beijing) has been founded, to the north of Changan.


Turn 80: The Phoenicians have founded a new city, Carthage, moved their capital there, and are now known as the Carthaginians.


Turn 82: The Egyptians have also founded a new city, known as Siwa.


Turns 84-86: The Persians have founded their first city, Parsa, and this meant the beginning of the end for the proud Babylonians. Zoroastrianism was founded there, and the Persians rapidly acquired a new empire. Also, the Terracotta Statues were built in China.




Turn 87: The Greeks have founded the new (and undefended) city of Sparte.


Turn 88: It was evident that war had erupted between Persia and Babylonia.



Turn 90: The Babylonian city of Ur was captured by Persia. At this point, it seemed evident that Babylon was inevitably doomed.


Turn 90: The Romans have founded their first city of Roma.


Here's the info about the next update. If you guys get your updates in by Sunday, I will most likely be able to make a third update by that Wednesday. However, starting Thursday, September 5th, I will be gone with no Internet access until the September 16/17th, so if there aren't enough updates by Sunday, I will postpone the third update until sometime after the 17th. The bottom line: if you want more updates, update by Sunday, and don't disappear off the face of the Earth while I'm gone!

Pi-Caxum: Oh Pharaoh, we need territorial expansion! Now, if we'd found a city by the coast, we could...
Ramesses: We already have a coastal city.
Pi-Caxum: I was talking about the Mediterranean coast, oh Pharaoh. We could build a Great Lighthouse there and...
Ramesses: I want a desert resort.
Pi-Caxum: I beg you pardon?
Ramesses: You know, like a safari resort but in the desert. So I can go spot the wildlife.
Pi-Caxum: But there is no wildlife in the desert... aside from scorpions, snakes and tiny critters which hide under stones the entire day.
Ramesses: I still want a desert resort. And I shall name it Siwa, because that excludes the possibility of puns.
Pi-Caxum: *Sigh*


Pi-Caxum: Also, the Greeks are pleased with us.
Ramesses: Does that mean we can let them do things like attack random nations or give their capital to us?
Pi-Caxum: ... I'm afraid not, oh Mighty Pharaoh.
Ramesses: Pity.

For a long period of time, the Median peoples were disunited. They were sheperds that lived on modern Iran that arrived from westren Europe.

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Well, that was true, until now. A king from Media named Cyrus the Great unified the medes and became the Shah of the newly-formed Persian Empire.



Many independent nations joined the newborn persian empire, including Babylonian areas such as Assyria and westren Persia. The only of those cities where things weren't good was on Judea, where despite the jews demanded to be part of Persia, the king of Judea refused stubbornly. The jews rose in arms to join Persia. Within a few months of siege, Judea was no more an independent nation. Pretty much the only nation that didn't join was Phonecia. Probabily because they werestrong enough to resist persian influence.

Around the same time, a prophet named Zoroaster began preaching the word of Ahura Madza in the newborn city of Persia. The inhabitants accepted his word quickly.



The babylonians hated the persians from the very beggining. They thought that they were demons and they had to be stopped. Cyrus was already planning to conquer Babylon but this only hurried the conquest. (sorry for sort of taking over Babylon, but I needed to explain it since nobody is around to play as Babylon).



The babylonians underestimated Persia and for that, the badly-placed city of Ur fell to the persians. The rest of Babylon will follow as well.

Romulus looks over the banks of the Tiber. This was lush green land, and would make a great city of culture, learning and government.​

"Settle here." he said to his advisor, Seneca.
"Yes, Dominus.
Seneca was immortal, like Romulus. They would guide Rome eternal. Instantly, Roma formed, a collection of wooden huts.

Romulus: Hey! Narrator!
Narrator: Yes?
Romulus: This isn't a French 18 Civs map, This is ROMA!
Seneca: What's a French? What's a Civ?

At this point, I guess this is a comedy.​

Romulus: Send our Legion north, we need to scout for targets er.. neighbors.

After the death of Nestor, a man named Cypselus came to power in Athens. He was disliked in Athens and was seen as against the local democracy and a monarch, being the grandson of Nestor’s father’s sister-in- law’s uncle’s niece. He did fashion himself more of a monarch than an elected official, but this eased tensions with the kings of the Phoenician city-states, yet continued to maintain good relations with the pharaohs of Egypt.
Among other things, Cypselus dreamed of having an empire larger than ever imagined. An empire that stretched from the hills of the Balkan Peninsula, to the legendary city of Babylon, and to the fertile riverbanks of Egypt. Alas, such would never come in his lifetime.

But a revolution was in store. Not content with being an elected official, he wanted to crown himself emperor. He had his personal guard raze the House of the Council of Elders to the ground, thus beginning the Korinthian dynasty. The event was hushed up and blamed on a candle fire.

After his death, his son Periander succeeded him. Periander wished to expand his empire. At first, he established a colony on the west coast of the Peloponnesus. It was called Sparta.

Periander also continued one of his father’s old projects. He knew of very fertile place that would provide for a good settlement on the Po River. A road was commissioned to connect this to the core Greek provinces. But in the years to come, one thing would stand in his way.

Rome.

China part 2

Qin Shin: China is the most powerful empire of far east!Right advisor?

Advisor:My name is Ming and not exactly

Qin Shin:What?But my empire is the ONLY in far east!

Qin Shin:

Meanwhile, somewhere in the desert...

Scouts:

Unfortunately, the reign of Abibaal abruptly ended when Hiram threw him off the balcony... Luckily, Hiram's son Pygmalion threw Hiram off the balcony. However, this was still a crime, so Pygmalion's sister, Dido, decided to leave Phoenicia for a new home, which would be called in the distant future "Carthage". When Pygmalion died in a balcony incident the rule of the empire came to Dido's descendants, and thus was founded the Carthaginian Empire.



(Now, back to narrative!)
"Hey Malchus, did you see what was going on back in Mesopotamia?" asked one of the king's advisers.
"What, do you mean the land where Babylon lies? Of course not! I have better things to do with my time than to hear about those pompous brats," responded Malchus, King of Carthage.
"Well I daresay you'll be happy to know that the people called the Persians have come in and basically taken everything over!" the adviser laughed.
"Ooh good! Does Sur still stand?" Malchus jumped up and down like an excited school girl.
"Indeed it does," the adviser said, which was responded to with Malchus preforming a flip. "But so does Babylon... but it will soon fall!"
"It better... or your life hangs in the balance!" Malchus growled, storming out of the room.

Romulus: Seneca!
Seneca: Yes, Dominus?
Romulus: Who are these people with a light blue owl next to them.
Seneca: Ah, the Graeci. They live to the east of Rome. They're building a road to the Po River.
Romulus: Why did they name it after a fat panda?
Seneca: What's a panda?
Romulus: You're hopeless, Seneca.
Seneca: Whatever you say, Dominus.

Updates will be due by Saturday, September 21st, as I will be gone until the 17th with no internet to a far away place, so don't spam or let this die while I'm gone! Anyways...

Update 3: Turns 90-121

Turn 91: Babylon finally crumbles under Persia's boot, fading into obscurity. Byzantion has also been founded by the Greeks. The Roman army also marches towards Melpum.




Turn 95: The Roman empire has already consolidated control over all of Italy.


Turn 100: The world is at peace... for now.


Turn 102:Egypt has completed the Pyramids in Per-Atum. China has also founded Luoyang in the center of China.



Turn 116: China has finished the Great Wall.


Turn 119: Tarraco has been founded on the Spanish coast, but Mediolanum has been captured by the Celts.


Turn 120: China founds the crappy questionably placed city of Haojing.


Turn 121: The Tamils and Ethiopia are born.



Just to reiterate the first point, updates aren't due for a while, until the 21st, so be good until then. Thanks!

i guess it's time fore me to write, ahem

One fateful day,the great tamil civilization decided to settle down on the southern tip of the indian subcontinent. But first a leader had to be chosen. At first they thought a man called Siddhartha Assokasson should lead them, but they quickly realised THAT would end horribly, so they settled on Rajendra. He then issued a royal decree to build the town of tanjipuri, after everything was built. He sat on his throne and thought to himself "How am I suppose to make a civilization to stand the test of time." He hoped his royal advisors would help him succeed, but it was all so uncertain at that moment in time...

Some time after the fall of Ur, the persians witnessed how the central goverment of Babylon collapsed. As the inmortals approached the city of Babylon to conquer it, they laughed at the warrior unit ouside Babylon wanting to flee the city. The unit will either be destroyed if the shah laughs at their foolish attempt to oppose Persia or will be left alone if the shah says that: "How the Babylonians can be so stupid in sending such units?!"

Also the governor of Jerusalem decided to troll the local jews by building a pagan temple there. The shah says about Ninua's production: "Best. Unit. EVAR."



The persians spot that the greeks decided to found Byzantion, very close to it's frontiers. The shah says: "This is silly. Everyone knows that Odessos is much better than Byzantion."

*In Ramesses' seaside resort at Per-Atum*

Ramesses: What time is it?
Pi-Caxum: Wait, I will go to the sundial on the fifty-third floor of your palace, oh Pharaoh.

3 hours later...

Pi-Caxum: It is five past thirty, oh mighty Pharaoh. Or rather, it was when I checked the sundial.
Ramesses: This system is obviously inefficient! We must replace it!
Pi-Caxum: I might have an idea, oh Pharaoh. We could use portable sundials...
Ramesses: Portable sundials! Ha! You never cease to amuse me, Pi-Caxum. Where is your megalomanical spirit? No, we will construct huge sundials, visible from miles far, always showing me the time!
Pi-Caxum: As you wish, my lord...

And so the Pyramids of Per-Atum were built.