Funny Journal Entries

[aronnax]

Frome the extracts of Julianus Estoivius, Foreign Minister of the Roman Empire.

25th July 332AD

Today, we recieve the ambassador of a new land far from borders of our Kingdom. The man hailed spoke broken Latin, with a heavy Germanic accent. He claims to be from the Holy Roman Empire. At first we thought it was a babarian from the German Kingdom pulling a prank on us but after he produced a seal signed "From the Throne of the Holy Emperor, Charlemagne" were we too believed him. The offended diplomat raised a complaint with the Emperor. Augustus nearly had my head. We apologised to him for not trusting him in the first place but in defence, who would be stupid enough to name their kingdom the same name as ours but with a Holy? The staff and I spent the entire night judging the new Kingdom as a wannabe of our grand empire. Silly babarians, can't resists fine Roman culture.

 

[dragon.jade]

"Your majesty? You remember that old warlord back in 820 AD that proposed to help the country? You remember that you granted him some money to settle in the capital as military instructor?

Well, it appears that move made him kind of immortal: It's 1890 AD and he's still alive!"

 

[DroopyTofu]

From the Diary of Julius Ceaser, 3400BC
_ "My scientist told me to come to the towncenter, and that they had discovered something amazing. When we got there, they showed me a piece of stone, but it had been cut to be round. They called it The Wheel. Suddenly, a large, shiny thing apeared in the sky, and a man came out of a beam sent out of the bottom of the ship. The said, "Put you shoulder to the wheel." Without hesitation, I did what he said. While I was doing that, he disapeared. I never saw him again, until my scientist told me about this thing called "Agriculture..."

 

[PaulisKhan]

excerpts from the diary of the illustrious and immortal ruler of Japan, Tokugawa the Genial.

Dear Diary,
Approached by Hammurabi the Devious who offered to share with our people the knowledge of paper, music and the optics in exchange for our knowledge of horseback riding.

I suspect a trap diary. I will tell him no.

------

Dear Diary,
Hammurabi showed up again today diary. He gifted us his knowledge of paper and optics, asking nothing in return

I remain suspicious diary.

------


Dear Diary
Hammy was here again today diary. He has offered to teach our people about education, music and astronomy in exchange for our knowledge of horseback riding. I am not inclinded to agree. His persistence indicates a fatal weakness. We must maintain our technological advantage.


------

Dear Diary
Ham can't seem to take a hint. Today he shared with us the knowledge of education and astronomy and gunpowder, he says it's just a gift but I know he wants something. He must think me a fool.

-------


Dear Diary

As I suspected! Hammurabi is MAD. Today he offered our people the knowledge of the Printing Press, Liberalism, Nationalism and Chemstry in exchange for our superior horseriding abilities. He clearly has no idea of the true significance of horses if he expects me to part with such knowledge for a paltry sum as this.

------

.
.
.
.
.



------
Dear Diary

Finally I am rid of the pest. Today Hammich climbed aboard his smelly flying contraption. He said he was headed to explore new worlds in the depths of space. He put on a brave face but the whole time I was watching him load the vessel I noticed not a single horse.

He must be feeling incredibly foolish right about now.

It's been a good day diary.

-Tokky