New Random Events (Funny Ones)

[Antilogic]

You have discovered Jarjar Binks. What do you do?

1: Let him live and reproduce. (+3 permanent unhappiness in all cities).
2: Neuter him, but allow him to live. (-10 gold, +3 unhappiness in your cities for 10 turns).
3: Deport him to another nation. (-10 gold, -100 espionage vs. that nation, +3 unhappiness in that nations cities for 10 turns, -2 relations hit with them, 50% chance they declare war on you, 50% chance receive a free great general named Darth Vader).
4: Torture him to death and record it. (-100 gold, -1 relations hit with peaceful leaders, +1 hit musicals type resource).

The fact that Jar Jar's screams of pain as dies a slow and agonizing death is considered a "Hit Musical" is utterly depraved. I like it.

 

[justininian II]

Strange new rocks???
Medevil age
Explorers find strange, black, burnable rocks

1. Fund further research (-100gold, reveal all coal, + 1 sci in all cities)
2. Ignore this... stuff (nothing happens)

50% chance when adjacent to coal

 

[generalstaff]

Idiocracy
Your population is getting stupider at an alarming rate.

1. Kill the stupid people. -50% population in all cities (Req. Police State).
2. Spend massive amounts on education and ban the FOX network. -500 gold, -2 Happiness
3. Well, I'm sure our best minds will figure out a solution... (i.e. the do nothing function) -90% Beakers and -10% Production in all cities.

Self inflicted defeat
Requires: Gunpowder, at least two gunpowder units in the same square
Your troops have misidentified another unit as the enemy and have open fire upon them.

1. Lose one gunpowder unit (Force response event, sorry).

Based on Battle_of_Karánsebes

 

[I-imp]

2. Spend massive amounts on education and ban the FOX network. -500 gold, -2 Happiness

Hey, its a fair and balanced network that critics both sides equally. With follow-up questions, thank you very much.

 

[generalstaff]

Hey, its a fair and balanced network that critics both sides equally. With follow-up questions, thank you very much.

I was actually referencing FOX the network channel not FOX News in my post. I am aware that the movie makes fun of FOX News though.

(Apologies if the post I am responding to is sarcastic, but sarcasm is hard to pick up through text)

 

[Matthew5117]

^Just add the sarcasm icon by using this except without any spaces :sar casm: It looks like this

 

[DaveMurray]

Subprime mortgage crisis (prereq: free market, corporation, built the wall street national wonder)

Your financial institutions have irresponsibly approved loans for high risk borrowers and are in danger of bankruptcy.

1. Bailout the firms and hope they can return to profit. (-200 gold, 50% chance of event reoccurring, 1 for 10 turns, rival civs receive 20 gold)

2. Maintain a strict policy against government intervention and let the firms fail. (1*[default number of cities] cottage/hamlets/village/towns reduced to city rubble, 2 for 10 turns, +20% inflation for 10 turns)

3. Nationalize the economy to ensure stability. (-500 gold, +20% inflation for 30 turns, 1 for 10 turns)


Corruption (prereq: Representation)

One of your governors has been caught trying to sell the former seat of the new president elect.

1. Secretly allow him to sell the seat which trying to convince the public that the evidence is false (receive 100 gold, 50% chance for 3 for 10 turns)

2. Allow the justice system to fairly prosecute the governor in question. (Courthouses produce 1 for 10 turns)

3. Mock his foul mouth and terrible haircut on national television. (Broadcast towers produce 2 for 10 turns, requires mass media.)

 

[toll_booth]

End the Spy Games
(Requires Alphabet)
(More likely to occur between nations that have been frequently conducting spy missions on one another)

(Civilization) believes that the spying between the two of you is detrimental to both nations.

-Sign a treaty to stop the spying. (Spies cannot enter each others' territories for 10 turns; any spies currently in them are ejected; -50% EP between the two civs; all diplomatic penalties related to spying removed)

-Agree in principle, but do not sign the treaty. (Spies currently in each others' territories are ejected, but they can immediately re-enter; (civ) less likely to spy on you during the next 10 turns; +100% diplomatic penalty for any spy caught in (civ) in the next 10 turns)

-Too bad; we need the information the spies gather. (-1 diplomacy point with (civ))

==========

Prison Escape!
(Requires Jail)

Prisoners have escaped from the Jail in (city)!

-Send the National Guard to hunt them down. Authorize the use of lethal force.
(+4 in this city and +1 in all other cities for 10 turns; +100% increase in Jail's and anti- effects for 5 turns; whipping during the next 5 turns produces no )

-Send the FBI to round them up, but mandate compliance with federal laws.
(+2 , +100% city maintenance, until 5 turns after the prisoners are rounded up; 20% chance of problem continuing to next turn)

-We are too busy to spare any efforts. Let the local authorities deal with this problem.
(+1 for 5 turns; Jail produces no or anti- while escapees are at-large, 50% chance of problem continuing to next turn (these effects are cumulative if the problem continues))

==========

Disease Epidemic
(-25% chance of occurring with Aqueduct)
(-25% further chance of occurring with Scientific Method)
(-25% further chance of occurring with Medicine)

A dangerous, contagious disease has broken out in (city)! Four population in (city) are affected.
(Note: Since this Event is ongoing, the player will receive these options every 5 turns until it is gone.)
(Note: Each city gets one Disease Point--DP--per population affected.)

-Cast out all those who are ill. (-1 pop. for every 2 DP; +1 for 10 turns for every 1 DP; 25% of the disease re-emerging in full)
(Obsolete with Liberalism)

-Offer sacrifices to the heavens to take away the plague. (+1 , -5% , per DP; nearby cities have a small chance of catching the Disease [the more Disease, and the closer they are the higher the chance--up to 20%]; 20% chance of -1 DP each turn, until the disease is completely gone))
(Requires Mysticism)
(Obsolete with Education)

-Quarantine all those who are ill. (+1 , -5% , and +10% City Maintenance per DP; nearby cities have a very small chance of catching the disease [the more DP, and the closer they are, the higher the chance--up to 5%]; 25% chance of -1 DP each turn, until the disease is gone))
(Requires Education)

-Hospitalize all those who are ill. Care for them until they heal. (+0.5 , +25% City Maintenance per DP; 50% of -1 DP each turn, until the disease is gone; EXTREMELY small chance of spreading disease to any city in the world)
(Requires Hospital)

(Note 1: The disease can spread across international borders, not just to your cities.)
(Note 2: After researching Biology, the game could set up spies to spread the disease, with the chance of severe diplomatic penalties...and of course, with the disease potentially spreading into your own cities!)

 

[Joecoolyo]

Corruption (prereq: Representation)

One of your governors has been caught trying to sell the former seat of the new president elect.

1. Secretly allow him to sell the seat which trying to convince the public that the evidence is false (receive 100 gold, 50% chance for 3 for 10 turns)

2. Allow the justice system to fairly prosecute the governor in question. (Courthouses produce 1 for 10 turns)

3. Mock his foul mouth and terrible haircut on national television. (Broadcast towers produce 2 for 10 turns, requires mass media.)

lol, I live near the "corrupt" person in question

 

[DroopyTofu]

Subprime mortgage crisis (prereq: free market, corporation, built the wall street national wonder)

Your financial institutions have irresponsibly approved loans for high risk borrowers and are in danger of bankruptcy.

1. Bailout the firms and hope they can return to profit. (-200 gold, 50% chance of event reoccurring, 1 for 10 turns, rival civs receive 20 gold)

2. Maintain a strict policy against government intervention and let the firms fail. (1*[default number of cities] cottage/hamlets/village/towns reduced to city rubble, 2 for 10 turns, +20% inflation for 10 turns)

3. Nationalize the economy to ensure stability. (-500 gold, +20% inflation for 30 turns, 1 for 10 turns)


Corruption (prereq: Representation)

One of your governors has been caught trying to sell the former seat of the new president elect.

1. Secretly allow him to sell the seat which trying to convince the public that the evidence is false (receive 100 gold, 50% chance for 3 for 10 turns)

2. Allow the justice system to fairly prosecute the governor in question. (Courthouses produce 1 for 10 turns)

3. Mock his foul mouth and terrible haircut on national television. (Broadcast towers produce 2 for 10 turns, requires mass media.)

Please, share with us your inspiration for those two.

 

[toll_booth]

Sarah Palin has taken over the government!

-Drill, baby, drill. (+100% build speed of oil wells and platforms; oil wells and platforms produce +1 .)

-Call Joe the Plumber. (Aqueduct produces +1 in (random city).)

-She can see Russia from her house. (Remove the fog of war from Russia for one turn.)
(Requires the presence of Russia)

-She's an outsider. (Diplomatic relations with all other nations are reset to 0.)

 

[Dumanios]

Killer Rabbit

Our (insert unit here) has found a cave littered with skeletons!he walks and there is a small rabbit.

1:Go on and kill it!(Unit dies)
2:Run away!(Gain Morale)
3:Attack from the side(50% of unit gaining Flanking 1,50% of 1)
4:Taunt it,maybe it will get so cross it will a mistake!(Unit gains 5 experience)

 

[Tephros]

Sarah Palin has taken over the government!

-Drill, baby, drill. (+100% build speed of oil wells and platforms; oil wells and platforms produce +1 .)

-Call Joe the Plumber. (Aqueduct produces +1 in (random city).)

-She can see Russia from her house. (Remove the fog of war from Russia for one turn.)
(Requires the presence of Russia)

-She's an outsider. (Diplomatic relations with all other nations are reset to 0.)

You forgot -10%, heh...

 

[toll_booth]

You forgot -10%, heh...

That gives me an idea: Universities and Libraries have no effect.

 

[Antilogic]

Or even better: those Washington insiders won't have any influence over your home-spun family values, so your Palace/Forbidden Palace/Versailles stops function as a center of government (in other words, you get max "Distance from Palace" city maintenance modifiers for all your cities). Now that is evil.

 

[Matthew5117]

^Even Courthouses?

 

[Antilogic]

Courthouses would still cut your massive number in half, but you would essentially not have a Palace any more. Ironically, State Property becomes the best civic choice...fancy that.

 

[Jabarto]

Mine is more an exaggeration of what already happens in the game - the "wind destroys pasture" event that happens EVERY SINGLE BLOODY GAME -than a totally new idea, but who cares, right?

A Tragic Wind Accident Requires: Electricity Tech

A foreign dignitary was visiting your palace the other day when he stepped outside the palace for a breath of fresh air. He got more than he bargained for when a sudden gale knocked him into a nearby bug zapper, stopping his pacemaker and killing him instantly. The world finds this story highly implausible.

- Finance an investigation to prove your innocence. (lose 2000 gold)
- Take the blame and move on. (-10 relations with all other players)

Solar Wind

A solar wind has decimated your newly launched space shuttle.

-Does solar wind even work that way? (your space shuttle is destroyed)

 

[Pembroke]

Grand Conspiracy

Requires: Internet must exist

"People are starting to whisper that there's a secret power group behind the government that has been making all the decisions for centuries if not longer. It looks almost as if some mystical immortal being had had absolute control of things from the dawn of time leading the nation towards a single goal with no heed to the consequences. People are getting frightened. What do you want to do?"

1) "Let's be real here, people. Every 4 turns... uh, years, you vote for the government you want changing the leadership if you are not happy with it. You, the people, are in charge. Ok?" (+1 in every city, lasts 5 turns, 50% chance of problem persisting)

2) "Ignorance and poor education combined with people's distrust of unfamiliar and romantic notions of heroes against government conspiracies can breed mass hysteria. Increase educational budgets and promote scientific popularizations to spread rational thinking among the masses." (Lose all bonuses from state religion, -500, +5%, lasts 10 turns)

3) "Cover it up. You know the procedure." (random building destroyed in random city)

 

[Wulture]

Not sure if it already is in the game (Or already suggested here, cant be arsed to read them all) but wouldnt it be realistic that if you launch a tactitacal nuke or ICBM, and if you start building a new one your scientist have a chance to revolt, and stop producing it?