The Empire: A very boring story by a very bad writer

Katlover97

The liberal
Joined
Feb 3, 2004
Messages
101
Location
At the bottom of a bottomless pit
Based on a game of Civilization II Test Of Time

Introduction

Hello =) This is a story based on a game of Civ II ToT I was playing.

The game was Extended Original, random large map, Difficulty: Warlord,
7 civs (includes aliens), Roving bands of barbarians, standard rules.
I am the male leader Louis the XIV of the French.

Chapters are in one hour increments (ie chapter one will be hours 0-1 in the game),
so that I can post this before it's actualy done ;).
Enjoy, and when the story's complete (or before, if you like) take the poll, and
give me your feedback :).

P.S. Don't chew me out for a boring story, I'll try to put more dialog into the next chapter


Chapter 1
It was 4000 B.C. when it all started. We had previously discovered Roads, Mining and Irrigation,
and our tax rates had been set to 30%, 50%, and 20% of taxes, science, and luxury, respectively.
2 decades later, we had our first city: Paris. We were already building armies of warriors
to defend our Capital from attack, and creating an alphabet! Our civilization was thriving.
2 more decades later, we had completed out armie, and had built a fort in which our armies
could reside.
Now 8 decades passed without us growing, but just when we had lost all hope, we finished a second,
but meager army.
"Alright men. Our job is to explore the unknown territory around Paris, ang we'll need our
wits about us." They had heard dreadful tales of barbarian raiding parties waiting in ancient
runes to strike at unsuspecting armies.
"But sir, what if we're taken by surprise by a barbarian army?"
"Simple," said the sergeant "we die with honor.". Luckily, he wasn't held to his word.
They went about exploring the continent without incident, while workers at Paris made progress
on what they called 'barracks'.
Soon, we finished our Alphabet and had new choices open to us. Our wise men chose to start work
on writing. After all, what good was an alphabet if you couldn't put it to good use?
Though our king, Louis XIV, said that our funds were enough, he couldn't conceal the truth:
We only had 10 coins. 10, measly, miserable, little coins.
It was then, in 3740, that our army sent out to investigate the surounding country, discovered
a valuable deposit of metal that was worth 100 gold coins! Along with that, the population was
steadily increasing and, acording to travelers, we were the 3d most advanced civilization in the world.
We then built our long awaited, barracks. We could build better warriors than ever before!
And so we did. We told the old warrior unit to go help the other explore, and gave the new ones the fort.
We figured out how to use a pen and paper later, and began to write maps.
Poplation steadily increasing, we decided we would need a new city soon, so we started training settlers.
Ironicaly, as soon as we finished teaching the settler the basics of settling, one of our armies discovered
an ancient civilization that was willing to help us, thusly we founded the city of Tours.
Paris, building it's library, Tours building some barracks (with the old army guarding it),
we sent a settler out to build a road between the two cities. Our armies having combed the entire continent,
we were quite sure our settler would be OK.
We discovered Map making, and started working on bronze working. We found more metal deposits.
It was then that we received word that the French were #1 happiest civilization on the planet!!! We rejoiced then.
We discovered Bronze working and went on to Ceremonial Burial.
The population was groing ever larger, thusly our scientists taking on new pupils, we discovered new advances
faster than ever. We discovered Ceremonial burial. Luckily, we never had to use the knowlage once.
We started work on warrior code, while we started training Phalanxes in Tours, and completed the road from Paris
to Tours! Paris built it's library, and started working on a light house.
It would take far too long to describe the many events that happened in the following years, so I'll narrow it
down and summarize it:
>250 gold in treasuries
>Discovered Ceremonial Burial, started work on Warrior Code
>Built phalanx in Tours, started work on temple in Tours
>Population increase in Paris, population increase in Tours some time ago
>Built temple in Tours, started work on library in tours
>Discovered Warrior Code, started work on Code of Laws, St. Augustine completes epic history:
The most powerful civ in the world, french come in 7th
>New tax rate: 60%, 30%, and 10% of wealth goes to Taxes, Science, and Luxuries respectively
After all of that, which took decades by the way, Paris built the Light House. Our first wonder of the world!
Then we started building our first ship. At the same time, Tours was done with the temple they'd been building,
and started training an archer. I skipped a few advances, so try to stick with me. We deiscovered warrior code,
code of laws and were now working on Literacy. Tours sent their archer En route to Paris, to board the ship,
and the settler finished irrigating the land around paris and went to board the ship as well.
As the ship left port, many, many people were lined along the docks. Some were just saying goodbye, others
wanted desperately to go with them. They watched the ship sail over the horizon, and then it was gone.
They went back to their buisness, going between Paris and Tours to tell tales of what they had seen on the road,
their only comfort was the two sentry guards at the very middle of the road, guarding from all those who may attack.


The End.

How'd you like it? Reply to this to send feedback if you wish, and take the poll too if you want.
If you want the summary I wrote in-game, PM me for it. Or, if it's requested by enough people, I
can post it here. TTYS ;)
 
Sorry, I forgot the poll =P
 
It's not really a bad story at all. Granted, some of it could use a little fleshing out, but overall it seems as though you have some promise :)
 
TY :)

thismessageneededatleasttencharecters
 
P.P.S. I just saw alot of misspelled words in the story I'll double check the next one
 
Hey Katlover, remember me?

Iv'e been out for a while (since september), but I saw your story and thought I should take a look. It actually looks promising, especially as the first cross between a timeline and a story that I have ever seen (Call be blind if you want, but I must be honest.)

Don't put yourself down, its bad for the soul.

Plus, it'll make you want to write less.
 
Hey Nylan =)

Don't put yourself down, its bad for the soul.

Plus, it'll make you want to write less.

It won't make me want to write less, but my stories might be worse.


I'll try to get the second chapter up today.
C ya then =)
 
Yes, specialist, I'm back. I've been busy, but I'll try to post more often.

UPDATE!!!!!!!!!!
 
Chapter Two

STATS: 1360 B.C. 300 gold 2 cities 250,000 people.
Hi again. I could lie and say that on my home planet, it's only been a day, but instead I'll
tell the truth (always best). I got slightly (ok very) addicted to a new game we got and
have only just today gotten around to finishing the second chapter. It's still and hour of
play (give or take fifteen minutes). Feel free to keep posting comments and such.

It was in 1320 B.C. that our trireme first sighted land. Our settlers and archers made
landfall and soon built the city of marsiells. The trireme was on it's way back to Paris
when a carrier pigeon landed on deck with a note saying that the English had made contact
and there had been a war started because the person in Marsiells who represented the French
refused to give away Ceremonial Burial. "They didn't say please" He was later quoted as
saying. When the trireme got to Paris with this bad news, Paris sent out to Tours for an
archer to go on the trireme to find and attack the english.
The settler, meanwhile, had discovered that they had landed on quite a small island,
an L shape that, if you walked all along the 'vertical' bar and the lower 'horizontal' bar,
was thirty miles long. This was quite enough to build a city, but it would have to have
constant trade caravans moving in and out later.
Tours built their archer and sent it off to Paris to board the trireme. They
decided that, seeing as they were at war, they would soon need a courthouse, so they started
production on one.
The trireme launched and days, weeks, months, years went on without incedent.
Travelers told tales of the amazing and wonderful collosus that the romans were building,
then, later in the year, tales of the wonder itself.
Marsiells relayed a message that the trireme had sighted land, and this news
coincided with the news of a new technology, literacy, to make a very hectic year.
The trireme landed and the archers soon found the city of nottingham.
Paris started to work on the crucial Great Library that would help our scientists to discover
new technologies, but lost 50% of their production as a result.
Travelers bought news that the english had fought off a trireme and archer, the french
new that it was theirs but didn't say anything about it. But Paris sent their newest trireme
(they built it before the started on the great library) to attack. And this time, the trireme
killed that last remaining unit in the city. However, it was to dammaged to attack any others,
so it rested there for days, until they saw signs of life in Nottingham (the english city)
and set sail, so as not to be attacked.
There were now two triremes out, one exploring the open ocean, the other charting the
english coastline. The war went on, quite quietly, only once was any trireme attacked, and it
won. The fact that there were barbarians everywhere on the frech continent, though, didn't
help.
Later that year, the trireme exploring the ocean sighted land, and went off to
investigate. Barbarian raiding parties frequently attacked tours, but there was nothing
the sentries on the road could do, they had to guard the way to the capital.
One of the triremes attacked an english settler, but it was too dammaged to survive.
At the same time, more barbarians were attacking Tours, without success. And a trireme from
an unknown civ attacked our trireme to boot! The trireme won, and went on to attack the new
enemy's city, but sunk there.
The romans were very far advanced at this time, and the golden age of philosophy
was begining with them. The French were getting on though. Tours, after building it's
courthouse, started on a diplomat, to bribe an english city, and they discovered republic,
started work on Iron working. But then the French were revolting. Not only did they not have
running water for their baths and showers, but they demanded a new government!!!
The king suplied this. He declared the french government a republic. The tax rate was changed
to 60% tax 30% sci 10 % lux.
Paris was in a state of civil disorder. The temple the government spent so much money
on didn't help. All that was left was to disband one of the warriors guarding the road, thus
decreasing deffense greatly. Only then did order restore in Paris. Tours built a diplomat,
and started on the great library that paris was working on before they had to build the
temple. Paris started building a trireme, and Tours sent it's diplomat there.
A little while later (the diplomat was safely in Paris) barbarians started attacking
Tours again. They attacked tours, and this time tried to get past the warrior to Paris.
But luckily, the warrior won. And Tours.
Marsiells built their baracks (alot of people thought it was about time) and started
working on Phalanxes. The french, after discovering Iron Working, started to raise horses to
ride.
Now TOURS fell into a state of disorder. But on the bright side, the population had
recently made over 500,000m, and the French were the 5th wealthies civ in the world, above
the pathetic english, or so said many travelers.
The diplomat that was going to incite a revolt in one of the English cities, never
had to. The French made peace with the English, after giving away a few technologies and
declaring war on Persia (who, they found out, had attacked them already anyway), and
cooperated to form a new map of the world. It was an unsightly blob, at this point, but still
helped. Entertainers were trained in Tours, at the cost of food and production, but that
stopped the disorder. The French started on masonry, and a trireme left with a diplomat to
make peace with the Persians.
The last thing that happened that year was another barb attack on Tours, it still
didn't do any dammage though.
 
Katlover97 said:
...There had been a war started because the person in Marsiells who represented the French refused to give away Ceremonial Burial. "They didn't say please" He was later quoted as saying.

:lol: I might put that one in my sig :lol:

Story sounds good. Keep it up! :)
 
I've been too busy recently I just a few days ago got back to this board. I'm gonna try and finish writing the story before I post the next one, cause I'm just no good at writing one chapter at a time and then doing something else, for some reason.
But just so as you know I'm still doing it
 
Top Bottom