Achievements you'll never see?

[GrantBud]

So, given my sick sense of humor, after realizing that some of the new achievements, such as "Raiders of the lost ark," "Dr. Livingston I presume" and "Here's looking to you kid" are significantly more complicated than some of those in the past, I thougt I'd post a few achievements that you'll never see.

America - Custer's Revenge:
Create three settlers in a former Shoeshine city with a Great General in a Shoeshine city, before raising it to the ground.

Aleppo Pepper:
As Persia, raze Aleppo after it has been conquered by the Ottomans and subsequently liberated by the Arabs.

Roots:
As America, capture 5 Songhai workers in a single game.

Party of God:
As Persia, launch a missile attack from a puppet city against the Jewish Holy City.

Graveyard of Empires:
Replace three separate civilizations as an ally of Kabul within 10 turns.

Western Betrayal:
As England or America, capture Warsaw from the Germans and trade it to Russia as part of a peace treaty.

Anyone else have a black sense of humor and care to contribute?

 

[digrosz]

The Mongolian Reunion: As Genghis Khan, make a trade deal with China in which you get your original capital back
They're watching: Make the game crash after you've assigned a spy in America's capital.
Because Bauxite: On an Earth map, as The Dutch, capture New York and trade it to England, and get a city located in South America back from them

 

[Securion]

Small Venice Violins; As Ottoman, get your whole army destroyed by Winged Hussars outside the city of Venice, and disband your Great General the same turn.

 

[digrosz]

Rather Be Dead Than Red: As America, retire from the game after your citizens have revolted and want to have Order as their Ideology
I can have carnival too: Capture Rio De Janeiro and raze all of Brazils other cities. Gift Rio De Janeiro to Russia and buy up a militaristic city state with the gained money, and have it give you a Pracinhas.
No Blue Jeans please: kill an English Musician in a war, and then capture Liverpool. Gain 1000 gold or more out of the peace deal

 

[Marathoner]

Flanders Fields: with an English GWI and an Edinburgh, Dublin and Valleta ally GWI, lined up in consecutive hexes, charge and all be killed by German machinegun units.

 

[God of Kings]

Turkish Delight: Win as the Ottomans in the Scramble for Africa scenario at the Deity difficulty and conquer Italy.

Impi-rial Conquest: Win as the Zulus in the Scramble for Africa scenario at the Deity difficulty and control all of southern Africa.

 

[Cyanfunk]

Dish Best Served Cold - As Poland, capture Vienna, Moscow, and Berlin.

Leopold's Magical Rubber Factory - As Belgium in the Scramble for Africa scenario, delete three workers after they complete a plantation.

 

[Buccaneer]

Despite having nothing to do with achievements, I find these hilariously clever. Nice work!

 

[pwnerer]

Kingdom of the Crystal Numbskull - As the US have an archaeologist survive a direct hit from a russian atomic bomb

 

[bevelnator]

Taiwantinsuyu: Capture the Chinese city of Taipei as the Inca. Not hard just a pun I thought of.

 

[kingofsealand]

Scourge of the middle east: As the united states/russia fund a proxy war via satellite city states/third world civs which results in a bloody civil war, general destabilization of the region, and a "cooperative" transition from any other ideology to freedom ( must donate at least 10 tank units, 10 modern aircraft, 10 cruise missiles, 10 bazookas). When this fails and chaos ensues, invade previous satellites, sparing no expense in your war effort (must have at least -200 gold per turn) to reclaim so called "weapons of mass destruction" Find no weapons, give away princely sums of your cash (at least 200,000 Gold must be donated). promptly abandon said country to its fate after order has been temporarily restored.

 

[GoldenShadow]

Kingdom of the Crystal Numbskull - As the US have an archaeologist survive a direct hit from a russian atomic bomb

After refrigeration*

 

[pwnerer]

The lone ranger - As the shoshone, attack a barbarian with a panthfinder within 1 turn an american cavalry unit attacks it. (and then put a bird on your head and some emo paint on your face)

 

[Qbone]

Vive le Québec Libre - As France, free the City-State of Quebec from England.

 

[GrantBud]

Milletimiz - As the Turks, liberate at least one of your former cities from each of the following civilizations within a twenty turn period: Britain, France, Rome, Greece, Russia.

 

[digrosz]

Where your Impi at - As Germany, wipe the Zulu out of the game with Landsknechts

 

[Iry]

Thermopylae - As Persia, have six of your units killed by Greek units during a single turn.
Set Forgotten - As Egypt, enhance a religion during a revolutionary wave.
Itztli - As Aztecs, capture every city owned by Spain during a single turn.
Blitzkaput - As France, kill six armor units in friendly territory during a single turn.
Avoid Fate - As Babylon, win a culture victory without building any towers.

 

[atahop]

Monkey See Monkey Do - found a city in ice with no resources around
I missed That Day in History Class 2 - in scramble for Africa conquer a north African city as the Zulu or Boers

 

[Gucumatz]

300 Build 3 units in Thebes and have them die against the Persians. The world will now forever forget that those Thespians fought and your battle will become a "Spartan" Artifact

 

[budweiser]

From the Halls of Montezuma... - As America capture the Aztec capital and any Moroccan coastal city with same unit. Must have the amphibious promotion.