The Tale of Yjor

[Master_Hugian]

I am planning on creating several customized scenarios which follow a storyline, and decided that one of the best ways to start this (and get peoples interested in it) would be to start of this story and when the games are to be played add more to the story as time (and games) go by.

Here is the starting

--- This is a collection of memories gathered by some mages investigating the death of an archmage. It is also the first ‘recorded’ sighting of Yjor. ---

The morning brought little relief to the as the snow continued to settle, the wind had, at least, calmed down which made it a bit easier to watch the surrounding area. It also gave him time to think which in turn gave him time to curse the sergeant for putting him in such a position. His brother trodden along with him along with the mysterious fellow who they were told they must protect with their life. Not that there was much they could protect him against as the only thing threatening to kill them was the cold.

By mid afternoon they had arrived at their destination, which by his standards, filled him with both shock and wonder at the same time. They crystal in front of him looked really impressive, yet he knew what it was and was scared because of it. It was something to do with magic.

“Did it just get colder or is it my imagination” his brother asked him, when he was about to reply he was assaulted by a strong smell which brought him to him knees, he could not stand against it. He collapsed and struggled as the smell seemed to get stronger and stronger and soon he felt his nose would explode. He managed a quick glance to his brother and attempted a call for help yet he saw him lying on the ground shivering. The mage, he just stood there… watching... his eyes filled with… relief, as his life left him. As he collapsed his killer smiled as he approached our paralyzed states.

“You should not be here” was the last thing he heard…



What do you think of this idea, and do you have any recommendations. (and please note, I have only gotten as far as the idea and the basic story.)

 

[seZereth]

What do you think of this idea, and do you have any recommendations. (and please note, I have only gotten as far as the idea and the basic story.)

I really like the idea of scenarios based around a story. I recommend you try to keep as much as possible with the current FfH world (what has been documented so far) and if you come to a point where no information exists about, you can ask a design team member, the details and the story itself is up to your imagination.
And if you show that you take this serious, you can ask me for the art of the special characters or stuff you need, just pm me about it when you come to the point its worth creating it

So i wish you good luck and great ideas

 

[Master_Hugian]

I am planning on keeping it as much as in world as possible and if I come to a point where I am not sure what would work I will contact a member. And thanks for the offer - I will make sure I have got most of the scenario ready before I would ask something like that.

 

[Master_Hugian]

I have made my first attempt at scripting (lets not talk about how it went), and while I was at it I managed to pick up a few ideas.

It shall be a four player map, the different civs will be the Amurites, the Sheaim, the Doviello and the Ljosalfar. Each will have a different goal to complete in order to win the game.

Now, I am once again going to try and capture you interest with another story clip.

"The walls were decorated with extravagant portraits detailing the many archmages and wizards, all of which held some power within the school at some time. One of them caught the young students attention. It was of the schools founder, a lavish portrait created with powerful magic. The death of this archmage caught the people by surprise, he was a powerful spellcaster and was protected by two of the finest swordsmen.

The student turned away and continued down the hall, he never liked the portrait to much, it always gave him the creeps."

 

[Dinkeldog]

I think it's a great idea, especially if you stay within the base world canon.

Having said that--and I understand English may not be your first language (so please don't take this as criticism of the idea)--I've taken the liberty of doing some proofreading for you:

-----------------------------
--- This is a collection of memories gathered by some mages investigating the death of an archmage. It is also the first ‘recorded’ sighting of Yjor. ---

The morning brought little relief to them.(? Maybe "him" or "the soldier". It's difficult to track the antecedent of the pronoun here. Maybe changing the gender of one of the characters or providing a proper name and using it would help.) As the snow continued to settle, the wind, at least, had calmed down, which made it a bit easier to observe(?) the surrounding area. It also gave him time to think, which in turn gave him time to curse the sergeant for putting him in such a position. His brother plodded (trodden is a past perfect verb requiring a "helper" like "was" or "had") along with him in addition to (duplicating "along with," twice in one sentence seems awkward) the mysterious fellow whom they were told they must protect with their life. Not that there was much they could protect him against as the only thing threatening to kill them was the cold.

By mid afternoon they had arrived at their destination, which by his standards, filled him with both shock and wonder at the same time. The crystal in front of him looked really impressive, yet he knew what it was and was scared because of it. It was something to do with magic.

“Did it just get colder or is it my imagination?” his brother asked him. When he was about to reply, he was assaulted by a strong smell which brought him to him knees; he could not stand against it. He collapsed and struggled as the smell seemed to get stronger and stronger and soon he felt his nose would explode. He managed a quick glance at his brother and attempted a call for help; but saw him lying on the ground shivering. The mage, he just stood there… watching... his eyes filled with… relief as his life left him. As he collapsed, his killer smiled as he approached us in our paralyzed states.

“You should not be here,” was the last thing he heard…

------------------------------------

"The walls were decorated with extravagant portraits detailing the many archmages and wizards, all of whom (people are "who" or "whom", objects are "which") held some power within the school at some time. One of them caught the young student's attention. It was of the schools founder, a lavish portrait created with powerful magic. The death of this archmage caught the people by surprise, he was a powerful spellcaster and was protected by two of the finest swordsmen.

The student turned away and continued down the hall. He never liked the portrait much; it always gave him the creeps."