Irish Caesar
Yellow Jacket
Wait, so on top of all the screwed up things and paranoia I already know about, if I get a girl a Cosmo she didn't ask for she'll think "He thinks I'm ugly and a bad lover," as opposed to "He thinks I could improve at sex."
Wow, that sucks.
Shouldn't have been difficult to figure out; if she were to "leave men's fitness magazines lying around where you could find them," would you be all excited, or would it be a passive-aggressive not-so-veiled insult?