Welcome back to GordIOT once again, buffoons and buffoonettes. We've had a few minor changes since we last saw each other. In a strange turn of events, ownership has been turned over for a restaurant. Emiya's Kitchen has now been passed over to the previous ownership of Paw's Brisket, keeping the name of Emiya's Kitchen, however. Strange, but let's move on.
Let's look at Skeletoni's to begin with. Their food quality has gone up a surprising amount since we last saw them, and it appears they've toned down the off-putting skeleton vibe. They claim their key to newfound success is a crash course through the "Spatulas of Justice" cookbook. There are also rumors that the cooking methods have become more "violent" in the kitchen. We're not sure what to make of this, but their tomato sauces are more vibrant than ever so take that as you will. In a recent interview, KaiserElectric quoted a supposed "Royal Scientist", a reference my children tell me is from the Nintendo game "Undertale". Bizarre.
Next up we have von Nuka-tan's Baron's Steakhouse. Steady improvements all around, yes, not much to note. However, we couldn't forget the newest addition to the steakhouse; an in house sommelier by the name of Count Montgomery d'Arges. The new addition takes the restaurant a step further in the high-scale direction, distinguishing itself as a high class eating establishment.
Chef Singh's Delhi Delights has also expanded fairly evenly. While some say that the higher quality food detracts from the homely feel the food has, numbers have shown the change has drawn in more customers than it has lost. New advertising ventures in the radio field have proven to be successful, and a local alternative station has even started a weekly "Indian Hour", playing the greatest hits of Indian-influenced rock. Coupled with their new delivery service, it is a smash hit with the senior demographic.
Guru Gurra's Smorgasbord Of A Name has adopted a new slogan with "Fruit For Thought". While not expected to be a big hit, it has been taken up by local hipsters and foodies all across town. The addition of local and in-house grown food has lead to the freshest fruit the restaurant has ever had, and sales have mirrored the increase in quality.
Chef Sumde's INFECTED! has taken a route not frequently seen by restaurants- a jump into the movie business. Partnership with a new zombie flick has increased sales greatly, as the restaurant has been granted exposure to customers all across California. The addition of a second location in Los Angeles has also proved to be effective, attracting tourists from across the nation because of its cult classic status.
The owner of Hot Pocket Heroes has had quite the mid life crisis. Reappearing under the new name "Chefzth", they have been under much ridicule after getting in a heated argument with a customer about Muesli-infused ramen. Closing temporarily, the restaurant reopened with much larger portions and a lavish remodel.
As always, Chef Okawa is producing top tier food and shouting at customers. We had to bring in our top translators, but through the anger we could tell that Shinobi no Resutoran needs to work on their customer service field. Regardless, many customers agree that it adds to the authentic atmosphere of the restaurant, making it feel like a quaint Japanese home. The food reflects this too, with Funa-zushi as fragrant as Okawa claims her customers are.
Despite a turbulent past week, Emiya Kitchen has managed to keep up the food quality that is the envy of the competition. The addition of swords decorating the walls has attracted the attention of foodie blogger and author of "As The Target Turns", known by his screenname Mechaerik, who praises the restaurant and claims it is "blessed by Saber desu vult".
This round seems like the round of innovation, doesn't it? It doesn't stop at The Whale's Gullet, where a recent expansion has lead to the new concept of "sushi parties". Despite the shady methods used for the expansion, these new ideas have become a hit among sushi joints around town. While their food quality has yet to see any major improvement, recent police visits and outreach from competitors across social media has contributed to a strange boost in sales.
Last up we have the titan itself, Cantina Sunrise. As always, the food keeps getting better and their popularity continues to soar. No one really knows how they've gained overnight success, some call it luck while some say owner El Terrance has made a deal with the ghost of Montezuma himself. Their new menu item, the Rainbow Rellano, has gained reputation among the LGBT crowd albeit unintentionally. Perhaps their true key to success is their uniqueness, setting themselves apart from typical Mexican fast food joints.
The moment you've all been waiting for, for the past few minutes that is, is here. Due to overwhelming criticism and an unstable rebranding, Chef Crez- I mean Chefzth's Hot Pocket Heroes has been eliminated from the competition. We've learned that rebranding can be a deadly blow, and it's normally best to stick to your gut ideas. Except for you Guru Gurra, your restaurant could use some abbreviation. As always, improve, improve, improve!
Player Food Quality Appearance Advertizing Size Price Points Available
KaiserElectric 14 6 4 5 2 10
Nuka-Sama 9 7 5 4 4 10
Terrance888 15 5 4 5 5 12
Tuxedoham 2 7 5 10 9 12
Inthesomeday 5 8 8 5 5 9
Omega124 12 3 3 6 5 10
NinjaCow64 20 5 1 2 2 9
Jackelgull 9 5 5 6 4 11
Gurra09 11 4 4 3 9 9