Most people lie in everyday conversation

[smalltalk]

"Thou shalt not lie" was once set in stone, but now it isn't almost worth the paper it's printed on.

A University of Massachusetts' study, found that 60 percent of people lied at least once during a 10-minute conversation and told an average of two to three lies.

People were recorded during conversation. Afterwards they were asked to identify any, uhmm, inaccuracies they told.

the students who participated in the study were surprised at their own results. "When they were watching themselves on videotape, people found themselves lying much more than they thought they had"

The lies the students told varied considerably, according to Feldman. Some were relatively minor, such as agreeing with the person with whom they were speaking that they liked someone when they really did not. Others were more extreme, such as falsely claiming to be the star of a rock band.

http://www.eurekalert.org/pub_releases/2002-06/uoma-urf061002.php

Of course there are different degrees of lying.

1) Telling something that is not.
2) Bragging about something that is not so big.
3) deminishing some large issue
4) not telling something that is, because it deranges your position
5) not telling something that is, out of sheer politeness

"Soft Lies" like #3 - #5 are perhaps quite common in everyday social live. In fact, number 5 is Forum Rule. Please read the FAQ.

Telling the truth everywhere and everywhen might be desatrous to your public life. Maybe you'll have some friends, that hold your honesty in a high regard, but other people might not be so fond of you, if you purge your trail-of-thought into their consciousness.

"We teach our children that honesty is the best policy, but we also tell them it's polite to pretend they like a birthday gift they've been given. Kids get a very mixed message regarding the practical aspects of lying, and it has an impact on how they behave as adults."

Now call me rude or mixed-up, as all my close friends know by now that I don't like presents. They are my friends, I love 'em, and have few problems to tell them the truth. But if a stranger gave me a gift I did not like, I probably said nothing but "Well, thanks."

Anyway, the old polyghraph lie detectors seem to be outdated. Another research group was able to detect lies with magnetic resonance imaging.

In each situation, volunteers chose an envelope, which contained a five-of-clubs playing card and a cash incentive, and were told not to divulge what card they held.

The group was able to decide from the scans, when the paricipants where lying and when not.

http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2001/11/011112073302.htm

We ourselves are rather bad judges on the truthworthness of our neighbors. On average, we are only able to tell a lie with between 45 and 65 per cent accuracy. About as good as to toss a coin!

http://www.newscientist.com/news/news.jsp?id=ns99992054

Other studies indicate, that the brain needs more time to to come up with a lie than with the truth.


So what is my point?

Outright lying, opportunist trickery and simple politeness. Where does one end, and where does the other start?

The brain seems to process lies in a different way than the telling the truth. Telling lies is using up a lot of resources.

Obviously it's a good idea not to lie. so you don't have to remember all your different stories. Saves a lot of stress.

But tiny little "evasions" seem to be quite common in social contact. Where do you draw the line?

 

[Perfection]

That explains, the lengthening of my nose, I thought it was just old-age.

 

[superslug]

It's all a lie, anyway.

 

[CurtSibling]

Everyone lies, and so do I!

 

[Tsukemono5]

I'm agreeing with Curt on this.

 

[CurtSibling]

You might be lying...

 

[smalltalk]

I begin to feel you are all from Creta.

 

[Ian Beale]

You have to lie. You lie to your parents, teachers, friends. The society we live in means that it is unavoidable!

 

[bobgote]

Originally posted by smalltalk
1) Telling something that is not.
2) Bragging about something that is not so big.
3) deminishing some large issue
4) not telling something that is, because it deranges your position
5) not telling something that is, out of sheer politeness

I think that only option 1 is actually lying. #2 is exaggeration, which is not lying, #3 is the opposite of that, and #4 and #5 are just omission, you aren't actually lying.

And the only one there i'd do on a regular basis is #5, and that's only when i'm being polite, which isn't often

 

[Shadylookin]

I never lie ever
oh crap there i go again

it feels not lying or not hiding emotions is against what society teaches.

 

[WillJ]

I always lie and never tell the truth.

*world implodes under the weight of that paradox*

 

[Benderino]

Originally posted by WillJ
I always lie and never tell the truth.

*world implodes under the weight of that paradox*

F*ck...now my head's starting to hurt...WTF? I'm so confused.


*sob sob* why are you torturing me like this?

 

[Richard III]

True.

 

[Perfection]

Originally posted by WillJ
I always lie and never tell the truth.

*world implodes under the weight of that paradox*

That's easy to debunk, you lie this time and tell the truth other times.

 

[WillJ]

Originally posted by Perfection
That's easy to debunk, you lie this time and tell the truth other times.

****. Why'd you have to ruin it?

Well, how about this: "I am lying right now."

 

[Benderino]

Originally posted by WillJ
****. Why'd you have to ruin it?

Well, how about this: "I am lying right now."

God Damn you!

I still haven't figured out the last one

 

[smalltalk]

Now come on guys!

Are you really here to discuss the logical problems of a [edit] 3000-year old paradoxon?

I'd rather want to hear about the calamities of telling the truth! This forum is not so superficial as you make it look like, is it?

Giving you some fodder for thought:
Could a monkey ever lie? Could animals lie? Could politicians be MP or president without lying? Is it a sign of high intelligence if you're a good liar?

 

[Benderino]

Originally posted by smalltalk
"Thou shalt not lie" was once set in stone, but now it isn't almost worth the paper it's printed on.

A University of Massachusetts' study, found that 60 percent of people lied at least once during a 10-minute conversation and told an average of two to three lies.

People were recorded during conversation. Afterwards they were asked to identify any, uhmm, inaccuracies they told.

I find it ironic that you, Smalltalk, made a thread about this subject. That's pretty funny--small talk and casual lying.

or is it small lying and casual talk?

 

[Fëanor]

Originally posted by bobgote

I think that only option 1 is actually lying. #2 is exaggeration, which is not lying, #3 is the opposite of that, and #4 and #5 are just omission, you aren't actually lying.

i totally agree

 

[smalltalk]

Originally posted by Benderino
I find it ironic that you, Smalltalk, made a thread about this subject. That's pretty funny--small talk and casual lying.
or is it small lying and casual talk?

Believe it or not, I was not aware of the special relationship between this topic and my nick. But in fact, you are right, the relation is quite close.

Makes me wonder, if I do have any associative power at all?

Still, the original question remains ...
where do you draw the line between an outright lie and bragging smalltalk?

This also means, like one of my links suggests, it is very hard for us humans to decide whether we are told lies or the utter truth.