Revolution

ggganz

ggganz

a.k.a. The Scyphozoa
Joined
Jun 25, 2006
Messages
3,485
Location
Sector 5
This is the story of the botwar, the newbie-n00b endangerment, the CFC-ACS alliance, and the IRL migration (you will find out what all of that means).

Before we begin this epic tale, I need to brign up the difference bewteen newbies and n00bs. Newbies :pat:, or newbs, are simply new people to a game/community. N00bs, or noobs, are newbies that insist they are experts, drive people insane with their ignorance to their ignorance, and just overall create anger. Please do not feed the n00bs.

Also, you for anyone who doesn't know what IRL means, it means In Real Life. Also, AFK means Away From Keyborard, as in "There is not IRL, only AFK."

I won't start the first chapter today, I'm too busy. But I'll start tomorrow, with an update hopefully every Sunday. It promises to be exciting.
 
The irony being only n00bs get frustrated by other aptly named n00bs ;) :D gutted i had to write that...
 
[party] :band: :dance: :woohoo: :bounce: :banana:
[party] :band: :dance: :woohoo: :bounce: :banana:
[party] :band: :dance: :woohoo: :bounce: :banana:​
That was all going through everyone's heads as the party started. Firaxis was releasing Civilization IV Complete with some extra new Mods, and Civilization Revolution. This would mean hundreds of new users to the CFC. Hence the party.

#civfanatics was flooded to the brink of crashing, so many people moved to #fiftychat to keep the party going. In case you didn't get that...
Spoiler :
BIG PARTY


So you get the point.

Suddenly, the music went off, and a loud voice said, "ALL USERS REPORT TO THE NEW NEWS ARTICLE ON THE FRONT PAGE IMMEDIATELY."

"I wonder what that could be about???" said KMadCandy.

Everyone quickly exited the chatroom, and were ushered by Chieftess, ainwood, and Turner into the front page, where everyone started to read the news article. But really it was Thunderfall, the divine ruler, about to give us a very important announcement.

"There will have to be some changes around here. As you all know, Firaxis has released new products, increasing our population.

"For most of you, this seems like good news. It is, in a way. But really it will bring our end.

"With all the newbies coming in, it can get pretty exciting. But where there are newbies, there are n00bs.

"This onslaught of n00bs is the perfect cover, hackers think, to launch bots. Since bots are usually stupid, they will just blend in with the newbies and n00bs.

"So, I'm going to start organizing an army. Anyone who wishes to join and help protect our registry terminals from these malicious bots may do so by signing up in the thread in News Updates. If we don't get enough signups by the end of the week, I may need to take more drastic measures. Like drafting.

"Have fun at the party."

KMadCandy: "Oh. I see."
 
But ggganz wasn't at the announcement. He wasn't even at the party. He was at http://www.codboards.com/ under the name The Scyphozoa, but with the same avatar. (BTW he is trying to get his name changed to that now.)

Not enough people had signed up for the protection team. So Thunderfall went seeking out CoD fans, as they at least have some experience using a weapon. He knew ggganz was one, and was determined to find him. He needed all the help he could get.

Meanwhile, The Scyphozoa was in a thread talking about what country has the best selection of weapons, but was pretty bored, because that forum is fairly dead. He would rather be playing CoD.

Thunderfall was able to find him. He was coming for him.

The Scyphozoa started to turn around to go play. He suspected nothing.

Thunderfall saw him. He quietly walked up to him.

The Scyphozoa heard him coming. He never went anywhere on teh internets without his M1 Garand.

Thunderfall saw the M1 Garand, and decided to just tell The Scyphozoa that he was there.

ggganz is now getting tired of typing this story with such cheezy suspense.

The Scyphozoa heard Thunderfall call out, "ggganz, turn around."

He did.

Thunderfall: "Would you like to join the protection team?"

ggganz: "The whaa??"

Thunderfall: "You didn't hear the announcement?"

ggganz: "No, I'm actually more into the games than the forums now."

Thunderfall shows ggganz the signup form, and ggganz says, "No way, I'm not gonna endanger the newbies, even if there are n00bs with them."

Thunderfall: "Read the whole thing."

ggganz reads the whole thing and says, "I won't do it until there's a chance that the server crashes."

Thunderfall: "There is a small chance of that, but you really need to...." A cell phone rings in Thunderfall's pocket. "What? Okay, I'll be on my way, and I'm bringing 94089 with me. ggganz recognized the number as his user ID number.

Thunderfall: "The server's under threat of crash, there's too much traffic right now."

ggganz: "I'll come."
 
Moderator Action: Moved to H&J
 
taillesskangaru said:
The Original Revolution Story
Click to expand...
Takes.........so.............long..............to...................loooooooooooooaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaooaoaooaaoaoaooaoaooaoodododoaoadodododoaooaoaoaaodoaodoaodoaogaddongnajajdodoajgajgjakjgnDHAJGDSFJGJNASkljodfgklfjdvna;fjjgklfjkabnadrjidovgnadgdfjdsafjkljdsafa whydidittakesolongtoload?
 
Hehe sorry it took so long. I've been playing with my new laptop. Anyway, here's the story.

ggganz came with him to the deep, dark depths of the CFC. Yes, he came to... http://www.civfanatics.net/!!! This was where all points in the CFCniverse joined. But right now, it wasn't looking so heavenly.

It was really hot, and there was smoke everywhere. Thunderfall said, "That's the server. It's gonna crash if we don't do something. Mods, I want you to try to calm it down. Other staff, I want you to work on making a backup. And you ggganz, I want you to go around with the protection team, and round up anyone who looks suspicious, and might be causing this problem."

"Define suspicious."

"Lacking a custom avatar. Oh, and bring me Swedishguy too."

"Why do you want Swedishguy?"

"It's not about what I want, it's about what he wants. After the danced00d incident, he's demanded to be a part of all major forum activities, or he'll unleash his Hitmonchados upon us all. I'd like to employ his Hitmonchados, I hear they're very powerful."

"*cough*andnonexistent*cough*"

"What was that? Oh, nevermind, just go! Follow Perfection's orders."

"Whaaaaat??? You expect me to even talk to that nutjob?"

"Just do it! I put him in charge of the protection team. Now move!"

"*grumblegrumble*Wish I had some Perfection-B-Gone.*grumblegrumble*"

So ggganz met the protection team in the Site Feedback forum, where Perfection was giving a motivational speach (poorly). "What're you doing here, ggganz? I wouldn't think TF would even think about a n00b like you."

"THERE IS A DIFFERENCE BETWEEN N00BS AND NEWBIES, PERFYBOO. I suggest you learn that difference if you don't want a shot in the back."

"Oh, I'm so scared! I'm sure the rest of the team would find it very difficult to kill you on the spot."

"Until you agree to only talk to me when necessary, I'd rather die, as long as it means you're dead too."

"Whatever, let's just get moving. OKAY, LISTEN UP! Everyone, sort into your teams and stick with your captains. Then I'll decide where Mr. Worsethankmadcandy can go." A few seconds later, "Well, it looks like CivGeneral's team has the least people in it, becuase some people must not have gotten slide one. So ggganz can stay with him."

ggganz: "Goodbye. I'm not gonna get within 10 feet of him."

"Oh, you're going with him alright. I don't really have a choice. Grab your M1 Garand, little man, and get moving!"

"Sorry, I've recently switched my preference to a BAR, if that's okay with you."

CivGeneral: "Don't think for a minute that I'm happy about this either."

"Really? I was thinking that; I didn't think you'd like me to get my way."

"No, I hate you too, don't get me wrong, but I hate you so much I can't stand to be with you, whether it means torturing you or not."

"I'll let you live on one condition: keep the pudding pop machine turned off."
 
So CivGeneral's team got in a big half-track and traveled to the Civ3 forums, where they had been assigned.

ggganz: "Ah, civ3, the dark ages of civ."

gandhi rules: "Hey, I think I see someone."

There was a group of 10 people, all standing in a little valley in between some hills doing nothing. They didn't see the protection team.

CivGeneral: "gandhi rules and The Yankee, in a minute you go down there and see what they're up to. Everyone else find a spot on the hills to hide and aim at them."

Before they could even get down there, four of the bots bolted to the create thread terminals in half a second, and had 4 advertising threads up in another half a second, then went on to another section. The others did nothing.

The Yankee: "Let's pretend we didn't see anything."

They approched the people and said hi, and asked what their names were. They responded: "adbot003", "adbot005", "adbot012", "adbot017", "adbot034", and "adbot095".

gandhi rules: "Oh, nice meeting you. See you later!"

They quickly ran up and informed CivGeneral, and he shouted "Fire!"

Everyone fired at the adbots, and took down 4 of them, but the other two quickly escaped and called in about 20 viruses to defend them.

Bozo Erectus: "Keep shooting!" but more and more of them came.

ggganz kept firing with his BAR and finally got bored of just sitting there, so he started to move around, mostly running in a circle, but also going slowly down the slope.

CivGeneral: "Get back up here! If they don't get you, we will by accident."

ggganz: "And this worrys you because...?"

CivGeneral: "Good point. Fire away!"

As ggganz got closer and closer to the group of viruses (they were calling reinforcements), he got a better shot at them. He was taking more down than he was before. But then they called in an air strike.

Everyone: "ocraprun!!"

Nobody hesitated. They ran so fast they almost didn't stop when they got to the half-track. The Yankee, gandhi rules, Bozo Erectus, and CivGeneral took the 4 mounted machine guns, while everyone else either kept their head down or used their own gun. But they made it back to Site Feedback very quickly. As they left Civ3, they heard a bomb explode behind them.

TF and the Mods and staff had managed to cool the server down by cutting off the Archived posts, but they had not heard the bad news yet. CivGeneral approched TF to tell him.

"Sir, we found some bots, they made some ad threads, then called in some viruses to fight us. We had to retreat when they called in an air strike. Nobody was injured, except... We've lost Civ3. They completely blew it up, and by now they're probably planning to set up a base there once the smoke clears."

Thunderfall: "Now not only is the server in danger, but also all of our users. I now have no choice. I have to recruit everyone with 30+ days/posts. Maybe even ignore the posts part. I want you to start spreading the word, first thing tomorrow!"
 
taillesskangaru said:
The Original Revolution Story
Click to expand...

ggganz said:
Takes.........so.............long..............to...................loooooooooooooaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaooaoaooaaoaoaooaoaooaoodododoaoadodododoaooaoaoaaodoaodoaodoaogaddongnajajdodoajgajgjakjgnDHAJGDSFJGJNASkljodfgklfjdvna;fjjgklfjkabnadrjidovgnadgdfjdsafjkljdsafa whydidittakesolongtoload?
Click to expand...

First, that is not the *original* story, which would be on FCF. Second, yes it does take a loooooooooooooooooooooooong time to load, which stinks. :mad: One day I shall post a new version of it. In the meantime, complain to Tonyf12 and Ball Lightning, if you really care (and I suspect the majority of you don't, so don't worry :D).
 
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